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Self-Trust Is The Foundation Of Trusting Others

Written by: Andrew David McDowell, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.


Trust. Big Word. A huge part of human life and experience. Why is it that we have such difficulty talking about it?

Key and a note on a wooden table with text - It Starts With You.

Safety Needed for Trust

Trust is a living and breathing invitation to a connection between two humans. At its foundational core are the words' safety and risk. Trust cannot be given until a sense of safety is felt by an individual about the building relationship. A sense of feeling that the risk of being hurt emotionally or physically is low enough that trust can begin to build. Trust is an innate part of our human DNA. It is how we are wired as humans, regardless of our gender. The different genders have different needs to feel safe but inherently, we both need to feel safe in our relationship to begin to feel trust with the other.

Trust Has To Be Earned

Trust is not an automatic invitation just by the very nature that you are a human being. Trust is not an inherent right. Trust has to be earned. You earn the trust of another human by your actions and your words. Your actions have a bigger credit level than your words in building trust. Not only is the actual action you are doing important but also, do your actions match up with and align with your words? Are your actions consistent with your words and do your actions bring value to the other person's life? The invitation of trust can be revoked at any minute. If your actions begin to cause doubt and fear that safety no longer exists in the eyes of another, trust can begin to erode or totally disappear.

Higher Levels of Trust

When we look at the Why?, How? and What? structure of a human being, a new invitation of Trust must be created to penetrate to the next inner level. A Trust invitation that goes directly to a person’s Why? is rare but not impossible. A typical path to a relationship whether it be a friendship or in a dating relationship, is to start at the outer layer of the What? and over time work itself to the inner core of Why? The Trust invitation must be “upgraded” to the next level before aspects of the How? and Why? are exposed and discussed.

The Importance of Self-Trust

When there are discussions of Trust, it is often related about the relationship between two individuals or between an individual and an organization. But there is another situation of Trust that I feel is often neglected. That is the role of Trust in an individual’s relationship with themselves. What I mean by this statement is how safe an individual feel with the thoughts, actions, behavior and choices that he or she makes in and for their lives. Once again, this is about connection. How well are they connected to their purpose, their needs, talents, skills and desires. The deeper they understand and are connected with their inner self, the higher the trust level will exist within themselves.

Develop Your Why To Start Trusting Yourself

When you start looking at possibly creating a new relationship in your life, whether that be with a friend, a new boss or with an organization, be sure to be mindful of the level of safety you are feeling. This will make you cognizant of the level of trust you have with the person or organization. The most important relationship you should be concerned with as it relates to Trust, however, is yourself. Are you connected with your Why? at a deep enough level that you can begin to Trust yourself in making good choices in your life. Choices that serve your Why? If you are not making good choices for yourself, you should explore the events in your past that cause you to not trust yourself and your intuition.

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Andrew David McDowell, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Andy is an engineer by trade and a creative by nature. He spent 22 years with the Boeing Company, where he always felt more like a life coach than a boss. In 2002, he began his journey into entrepreneurship within a Corporation when he was asked to develop an Airspace Design Consulting business from scratch that would serve the global government market. Andy has a Bachelor’s Degree from Georgia Tech in Electrical Engineering and a Master’s Degree in Computer Information Systems from Georgia State. Naturally, his aviation work took him around the world and enabled him to work on high-profile projects - such as preparing the Beijing and Sochi Airports for their respective Olympic Games.



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