Written by: Fran Pedron, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
The Beast within is actually your friend … WILL YOU BE YOUR BRAVE?
Have you ever been downsized? Bet you’ve experienced something earth-shattering in your lifetime.
Mine looked like this:
Friday back in the office from an out-of-town client’s facility – time and expense reports due on my boss’ desk. Great weekend planned in the mountains.
Monday—Pink Slipped. Locked out of my computer, and I looked forward to—two weeks severance pay and looking for a new job.
What started out to be a lovely Monday, changed my life forever and I was lost and scared. I was in my early 40s; had bills to pay; food to put on the table; and a lifestyle I had grown accustomed to, to live and improve. Plus, I did not know how to proceed.
TWO CHOICES – WHICH ONE
Whether in your personal or professional life, things change – people leave – something stops outside of your control. You either choose the adventure of purposeful change, or you become paralyzed in fear.
You may have had a similar experience or at least one that looks like this. 2020 was this for many people.
If you chose to go with the flow, did you see where before—you might have spun out of control, and those results left you limp, as a washrag over a waste barrel? But now, you knew that you could manage your change with ease because you made it through prior trauma successfully.
What if you didn’t? What if you chose not to go with the flow and ended up with that limp washrag? Are you still paralyzed with fear and searching for a way out of that waste barrel?
HOW DO YOU PIVOT
“If you know yourself, but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer defeat” – Sun Tzu
What did you choose? What did you do to combat the paralysis?
Our mind goes blank and fear paralyzes any future action. Recognition is the first step toward upward mobility, to overcome that danger reaction, our body AND our mind decide is the only choice.
Here are steps to overcome the paralysis ….
Acknowledge the fear – fear is an emotion and something you can overcome. You know what that “fear” is and many times, it comes from a past experience. To solve it, you have to know what that something is. Then you understand the problem is not the boogie man. You have the confidence to solve the problem.
Relax – calm composure overcomes fear. You stabilize that “fear.” Face it. See that it cannot harm you in the ways of your past.
Think about the benefits – turn that negative into the positive. Take the power away from your “boogie man.” Disable it. Hold and turn that positive into the motivating factor, which releases the paralyzing hold from that particular comfort zone.
Take action – set yourself up for success by purposeful strategy building. You have surmounted a problem that has set you back – that fear. And you are moving forward to your desired destiny with a plan of attack.
Not only have you climbed out of the waste barrel of defeat. You have maneuvered safely through times of chaos and upheaval.
BEATING the CHAOS – ENSURING STABILITY
Building stability matters. Knowing you are in control during chaotic times converts into confidence, safety and self-trust, in your personal and professional life.
One way to build stability is by using Smart Goals. They can be used to make plans, measure progress and change behavior patterns, which support paralysis from fear.
Smart goals pad success in your favor by: clarifying your ideas, focusing your efforts, making productive use of your time and resources, and simplifying the change process.
SMART goals are:
Specific – simple, sensible, significant, using the six “Ws” to increase your chances of accomplishment. Is your goal on track?
WHO – is involved?
WHAT – do I want to accomplish?
WHERE – identify the location.
WHEN – establish a time frame.
WHICH – identify requirements and constraints.
WHY – specific reasons, purpose, or benefits of accomplishing your goal.
Measurable – meaningful, motivating, establish a concrete criteria for measuring progress toward the attainment of each goal you set. When you measure progress you:
Stay on track.
Reach your target date.
Experience your achievement – YEA! YES! I DID IT!
…. motivation for the next phase.
Achievable – agreed, attainable, is “this” goal important to you?
You figure out ways to make it come true.
You develop: attitude, abilities, skills and the financial capacity to reach it.
You plan steps, with time frames needed to carry out each piece. You watch your goal take shape, as you move closer to completion.
You build self-image. You see yourself as worthy of your goal. You develop traits and personalities that allow you to possess your goal.
Realistic – reasonable, relevant, resource, result-based and must:
Represent an object you are both willing and able to work toward.
It can be both high and realistic – you must decide just how high you are willing to allow IT to be. Your goal must be realistically accomplishable for you.
A “high” goal at times is a labor of love.
Your goal is probably realistic IF you truly believe it can be accomplished.
Your goal is probably realistic IF you can: taste, touch, smell, see or hear it.
Timely – time-based, time-bound, time-limited, cost-limited, time-sensitive, there is a grounded time frame for accomplishment.
With NO time frame, there is no sense of urgency.
With a time frame, you have set your subconscious mind into motion—to begin work on your goal.
Every goal needs a target date: when—today, 6 weeks, 6 months, etc.
Building success into any action or behavior change is simple, when following a defined route. To address behavior changes, we follow the same path, and look at changing our behavior, through created HABITS using the same Smart Goals.
Checking habits and behaviors: what is working for you?
Are they good or positive: i.e. –being on time, cooking a delicious meal, smiling, following through, arguing fairly, having a happy heart, etc.
Are they bad or negative: i.e. –gossiping, drinking to excess, not keeping your word, overindulging, lying, etc.
Making changes by using the same Smart Goals as above and answering these questions:
Specific: you notice a behavior or habit. What is it? Did it originate from an event or person’s action? Where and when you decided to form it?
Measurable: measure the benefits you receive. What do you receive by continuing the behavior or habit? How much does it cost in the quality of your life?
Achievable: you decide to keep it or not. How does your life look different with or without it?
Realistic: you decide how it fits into your life. With any change or modification – time is a habit-creating element. What time elements work best for your success?
Timely: You decide when the change needs to happen. NOW or SOMEDAY?
What behavior or habit do you want to change, which will benefit you and your success?
Whether you choose to awaken the beast within or not, your life quality is a decision resulting from how well you adapt and the adjustment you make to address fears, change, success, etc.
Will you allow your resources to become tools, which work for you and fit into your success plans?
Will you be brave and allow your beast within to be your win?
Fran Pedron, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Fran Pedron combines intuition, education, and life experience to help clients understand their foundational self-definition, make changes, and intention-purposed plans, which align with who they are as they create their desired outcomes.
Her experience in insurance, technology, accounting, communications, along with being abruptly downsized later in life, led her to understand how change affects people and their decision-making processes, along with the need to make decisions aligned with their authenticity.
