Were You Raised To Be The “Good Girl” And Follow All The Rules?
- Nov 8, 2021
- 5 min read
Written by: Dr. Denise L. Morrison PT DPT, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Do you still carry the heaviness of those perfectionist expectations? How’s that working for you now as an adult? I hear from many women (and some men) that they have been living in a low-level state of stress, anxiety, and depression.
They tell me they just feel a general sense of unease going through life; yet, they can’t pinpoint what’s causing this… but I can. At the root of their stress and negative emotions are their old, childhood programs that limit their beliefs about themselves. Those old programs and beliefs stifle them from living to the fullest expression of themselves. Wouldn’t it feel amazing if you could finally shed those old beliefs, rules, and expectations? Just imagine all of the energy, happiness, excitement peace you’d feel….being the real, authentic YOU?
It’s time to step into your power!
Give yourself permission to listen deep down inside yourself and gather up your courage to say “yes” to YOU! While you’re at it, start using your powerful voice to say “NO” to the norm! Cut loose the cultural expectations that have kept you hidden in a metaphorical box!! Stop people-pleasing and giving away all of your energy to people who take advantage of you!! Go right ahead, my friend!! I’m here to support and witness the magic coming from inside of YOU! It’s time to let your true self speak up and lead you to live a life that excites you!!
My client Deborah finally did at the age of 52 and she’s never felt more invigorated and passionate about being her most authentic self!!
She always did what she was told to do because she was the firstborn. Her parents set the bar high for her to be the perfect one and lead the trail for the rest of the siblings to model success. From an early age, she felt pressure and heavy emotional climate of her family dynamics, to always perform, do her best and never show emotions. Sadly, she also absorbed the unsaid expectations of having to win the approval of her father. And as you can imagine, this set the stage for a life of striving and feelings of pressure to keep achieving again and again. Deborah came to me at 51 years old; overweight, fatigued, frustrated and feeling like she wanted to run away from it all. She was now a prominent figure in society, earning significant amounts of money and married to a man (who, coincidentally, was just like her father). She was feeling stifled, stuck, and didn’t know what was keeping her that way.
Together we took an honest assessment of all aspects of her life. My Holistic Assessment helped her to get clear on the areas of her life that she felt fulfilled and those areas where she felt drained. Once she could see and feel that she was living in survival mode and old past patterns, the transformational process changed her career, marriage, and relationship exponentially!
My Intuitively Unique Coaching process goes like this:
Discover who you are and what you want
Knowing what you want out of your life can be the biggest hurdle to achieving it. Many women I work with don’t know what they want—only that they aren’t happy with what they have right now. I’ll coach you through a process of reflecting and casting a vision for your future. What do you aspire to move towards? What do you want your future to look like? You’ll learn to look inside and listen to your own powerful voice.
Clear the obstacles out of the way
We all face obstacles in our lives. Some people are held back by experiences in their past. Others stay blocked because of unconscious beliefs. I have an extensive toolbox of techniques to help reframe your past experiences, rewire your belief systems, and retrain your thoughts and actions. These techniques will help you overcome any obstacle standing between you and what you truly desire. Create a plan to get what you truly desire
When you have a vision of what you want to achieve and the tools to help you overcome any obstacle in your way, you finally have control over your life. You are able to listen to your inner voice and make better choices and decisions. The gap between where you are today and where you want to be tomorrow closes, and you are able to live authentically and vibrantly as your best self. After our coaching journey together, Deborah was able to confidently tap into her inner wisdom to speak into the world what she desired. Of course, she considered the needs of her family; however, now she had firm, loving boundaries to ensure that her mental, physical, and emotional wellbeing was a priority. Those extra pounds were released when she let go of the years that she carried the expectations from her father. Deborah happily embraced and honored her deepest emotions and used them as a guide to stay true to her priorities and keep her boundaries intact.
She learned how to create a new way of “being” and felt invigorated at 52 years old!!
Why did I share this with you? I know that you struggle too. Every time you say to yourself that “it needs to be perfect” or you compare yourself to others. When you ask everyone else for advice because you doubt your true inner wisdom and ignore what you deeply feel is right for you even when it goes against the norm. I want you to know that you CAN leave those old “good girl” behaviors behind and create your OWN rules moving forward!! I believe that YOU can transform into the mind and body you seek. Email me if this struck a nerve and triggered a flood of emotions in your heart and body. I would love to hear from you.
Dr. Denise L. Morrison, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Denise Morrison is the CEO of Intuitively Unique Coaching, her Holistic Brand of Health/Life Coaching.
She struggled for decades to overcome traumatic experiences from her own past. She compensated for her lack of confidence with degrees and professional success. She numbed her pain with addictive eating and self-abusive behaviors. And when she finally turned to the right teachers and coaches, she learned that change does not need to take decades. Change can actually be instantaneous. And change can be lasting. After working for many years in healthcare, Denise felt a pull and a passion for working with people on a deeper and more transformational level.
Her academic mind was drawn to the evidence-based nutrition and exercise practices, but she was also compelled by the more mystical therapies emerging from neuroscience and quantum healing.
Denise sought out the best training in health and wellness, life coaching, and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) to have access to the most powerful tools to help others change their lives for the better.
