Written by: Christelle Deblon, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Did you, as many of us, take some new year’s resolutions end of December? Do you want to stop buying anything from the Internet, see your family more often, lose weight or start running? The range of possibilities is wide.
And probably, like most people, at this early stage of the young year, you are already struggling with keeping up what you promised yourself. Change is never easy, let’s face it! So, my first tip would be: be kind to yourself and accept that perhaps you did not have all the keys to success. Of course, you already know that your goal must be SMART, but the truth is that’s not enough!
That’s why I want to share with you 7 + 1 easy steps that will make a huge difference. Fasten your seatbelt, here’s the magic:
1. Why and for what?
The very first step is to understand deeply your motivations. Why do you want to change? What’s the reason behind it? And for what? What will it bring? What will it change in your life? What might be possible after this change came true?
Take time to understand your deep motivations, and write them down, for example in a beautiful booklet or on your iPad.
To illustrate, I will use my own example. In 22, I want to lose 25 pounds. There are several reasons for this:
Three years ago, I almost died in an accident. I realized that being in good health is the most precious asset one might have. And I know that being overweight has a negative impact on my health.
I want to get back to my weight of 2019, and there is a financial reason for this. I then renewed my closet – and it cost me an arm and a leg - and today, I cannot wear any of these wonderful sexy clothes! I started to buy some clothes on Vinted, to survive in between, but really …
Finally, I’m often short on breath and more tired.
These reasons are strong and relate to my life goals and values. Check!
2. Each word counts.
When articulating your goal, make sure you use positive and concrete words. Our brain can help us, or hinder us in this exercise. The more specific, realistic, and understandable your goal will be to your brain, the more your brain will help you as you go. The reason is that your brain cannot figure out something negative or inexistent. He will not know what to do to help you to reach the target.
So, prohibit negative formulations as ‘lose weight’, ‘quit smoking’ or ‘do less of this’. Instead, express an intention linked to a real outcome.
In my example, it will be:
I want to get a slim and muscled body, a dynamic figure
I want to weigh xxx pounds
I want to get back to my silhouette of June 2019, when I was proud to be in a bikini on the beach of Saint-Tropez
3. Experience your goal with your 5 senses.
The ‘Saint-Tropez’ target is a perfect illustration of this point. The more your brain can see, feel, … what you mean, the more it will help you get there.
Translate your objective into outcomes related to your five senses: what will you see? How will you feel? How will it taste?
For someone wanting to quit smoking, for example, it could be seeing yourself able to walk up four floors of stairs in one go, being able to play in the garden with your children, having a good breath, or being able to taste the wine again.
4. Make your action plan.
That’s an essential point, and yet often forgotten! How will you get there? Which steps will be necessary? Make a very specific plan. Take also possible constraints or limits into account. Be realistic! And last but not least, if your action plan includes actions that will take time, plan them thoroughly in your agenda!
In my example, no way that I can lose 25 pounds by the end of January! A reasonable target might be 2 pounds a month. Thus, a reasonable target might be October.
My action plan is:
To do at least one hour of intensive sport three times a week (twice in the week and one on the weekend) – and I plan these meetings with myself in my agenda
To drink alcohol only on the weekend or on occasions (restaurant, with friends, etc)
To work on my emotional eating
To pay attention to my feeling of satiety and immediately stop eating
To follow strictly the tips of my nutritionist.
Another dimension to consider when it comes to your action plan is evaluation and feedback. To keep going, you need to check that you did what you committed to do and measure progress on the road to your goal. Again, regular writing will help:
I will record these topics in my journal and assess every day what I did well and what went wrong.
In case of failure, I will try to understand why (especially important for emotional eating)
At the end of each month, I will measure progress, and adapt actions accordingly.
5. What will it cost?
This is the one you never think about! Not the financial cost, but the impact on your life. People imagine they can start to go to the gym three times a week, while they already have no time for a daily five-minute walk. Guaranteed that the first time your husband calls to say he can’t look after your children tonight because of an important unexpected meeting, your disappointment will lead you to consider you will never be able to reach your goal.
Moreover, you must know that we never change if the cost of changing is higher than the cost of not changing. So, at this stage, you must assess the cost of not changing and assess the cost of changing.
In my example, making sport three times a week has an impact on my weekly schedule. On the weekend this is quite easy, but in the week, it means I need to stop working earlier, which might be an issue. Another important cost will be the feeling of satiety. I just love eating! And of course, when it comes to spaghetti Bolognese, even if I’m full, it is very hard for me to stop eating.
But what will it bring to me? In short term, I do not need to renew – again – my closet. Direct financial benefit. In the longer term, studies show that being overweight can reduce the life expectancy of 3 to 6 years. Moreover, there is a higher risk of diabetes, heart problems, articulatory disorders, etc.
When considering this, is the cost of not changing higher than the cost of changing? Definitely!
6. How are you going to reward yourself?
When your son is brave, you probably reward him right? So, why don’t you do the same with yourself? Adding rewards to your action plan will have two consequences. It will add extra motivation, improving your chances to reach your goal. And even more important, taking the time to celebrate your progress will create a positive memory and underline the importance of the step you reached.
The ideal is to think about key moments. For example, an important milestone has been reached. Or you have done something very difficult.
In my example: if I keep on doing my sport 3 times a week, 4 weeks in a row, I will grant myself a massage. Or, when the first target of XXX pounds is reached, I take a day off in a spa.
Again, make sure you write this down in your notebook and assess regularly how close you are to your reward.
7. Tweet it!
Make your commitment public. For once, your post on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram will be useful.
Making your commitment public will make it more difficult to quit: if your family and friends are aware of your goal, you’ll have to explain why you change your mind.
Christelle Deblon, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
"For Christelle, joy is definitely the greatest emotion one can feel. She dreams of a world where everyone wakes up in the morning anticipating the joy of the working day to come. Not only she dreams of this, but she puts all her positive energy and broad skillset into action to make this vision become reality and to impact the professional world.
Before being a coach, she worked in marketing, communication and direct sales. She then had the chance to become a people manager. That's when she discovered her mission: helping others to become the very best version of themselves in their professional life.
In 2011, she decided to make her dream come true: she learned coaching, and started her own business. For the last 10 years, she provides hundreds of days of training, facilitated work sessions in sectors as going from banking to semi-conductors sales, helped teams and individuals to improve, led projects, and enjoyed every single day!
Living in Belgium, her mother tongue is French, and she works in English and Dutch as well.
She successfully completed her Coaching training in 2013, and kept on developing herself continuously ever since. She is certified in Stress & Burnout Coaching, Prosci ADKAR change management and Appreciative Inquiry (Case Western University). She contributed to two chapters of 'Le grand livre de l'Appreciative Inquiry' published in 2021."
