Never Do These Things – 4 Steps To Preventing Self-sabotage
- Sep 2, 2024
- 5 min read
Written by Marc Scheff, Life Designer
Marc Scheff works with people to design lives beyond what they think is possible. As a child he saw first hand what shifts in perspective and mindset can create even against difficult odds. He now dedicates his time to working with high-level creators and entrepreneurs to create well beyond the success they've had and into the success they've dreamed about.
Confession: I kind of laugh at the idea of getting things done. Not doing things, but I have a very reasonable critique on what is arguably considered the bible of productivity, “Getting Things Done.” Maybe 20 years ago I read the seminal book by David Allen and I realized something.
If I followed all these processes, kept my lists, binders, planners, I wouldn’t actually have any time to DO any of the things on those lists.
Organizing and tidying up could take up the time I need to do things
That is, in part, because organizing and list-building is one of the (many?) ways I sabotage my own creativity and productivity.
There are others. Internet rabbit holes get me like anyone else.
Fast forward, I do love my lists and organizing tools. I have so many projects going on at once, I have my coaching practice, I’m a creative, an entrepreneur, parent, partner, dog owner, school/camp chauffeur for my kids, chef to my family, and I have adult-diagnosed ADHD which is just, like, a nice finish to the whole thing.
The scaffolding upon which I build my success sometimes feels like something out of Tina Turner’s Bartertown, complete with my own internal Thunderdome where competing projects fight for my attention.
Real talk. I live by my Google Calendar and Trello lists. They keep me on track, my focus blocks keep me sane.
But these are things I want to or am committed to doing.
It’s the things you don’t have on the todo lists that get in the way
Nobody puts “doom scroll for 2 hours before bed” on their calendar. And yet…
Have you ever looked at your day, week, or weekend and gone “damn, why did I spend my time on __________, when I have _________ project that really excites me?”
How do you avoid things that you keep doing but mostly wish you didn’t?
You need a creative sabotage list
Darkness hates being dragged into the light (mwaahahaha). Similarly, by shining a light on the things you’re doing that get in the way, you can make a plan around how to remove, replace, or reduce time on those activities.
Here’s how to make yours:
Make a page with three columns: Never, Sometimes, Always
Write down all the things that drain your creativity, and put it in the appropriate column.Does it Never, Sometimes, or Always drain your creativity?
Now, take a breath, grab a snack. Do walk away for a moment. It’s important to let your right brain get a little warm up for step 4.
Come back and mark each item with a color:
GREEN - Reduce time
RED - Remove
YELLOW - Replace
Don’t judge, don’t edit, just write. If it pops into your brain, write it down in step 2 and evaluate later in step 4.
These exercises require being honest with yourself. And your brain is excellent at rationalizing. So if you find yourself going “well, that’s not so bad” just write it down.
Don’t think, write.
Why a never column?
If something never drains your creativity, why write it down?
It might not drain your creativity directly, but maybe it’s just something you have a sneaking suspicion isn’t you. This is a deeper cut on this work, because it’s less about the impact and more about how much it fits who you want to be. For example, running doesn’t drain my creativity, but I stopped running when I found that jiu jitsu gave me everything I wanted from a physical activity. It’s not about good/bad binary, but maybe it’s not the greatest fit.
What might you find?
Well, let me out myself with something from my list.
With waves hands everything going on, I got back on Twitter.
I rationalized.
My wife is on there and I’m keeping up to connect with her.
I care about the future of our country and the people in it, I am finding ways to engage.
I follow a lot of artists, keeping up with creativity.
I follow a lot of therapists and coaches, keeping up there too!
It’s research, it’s good for new ideas, it’s good to connect with folks there.
When I created this exercise and did it for myself, I started to look at the behavior and see if it needed to Reduce, Remove, or Replace.
It got a tentative green. It doesn’t drain me, in small doses. In large doses it drains my time spent on other things that fill me up.
I realized, to get the positive things from this activity, I don’t need to spend more than an hour a day. Two max.
Solution! I don’t want to not do it, I want to do it less.
Thank you screen time, which now has a limit I can feel good about. A limit will also help me focus on the positive aspects when I do get on there, like going in with a clear intention. And that will feed my feeling of accomplishment, confidence, creativity, all of it.
It also means that I can Replace some of the time I gained back doing things that fill me up, like writing this article.
You don’t really need to never do these things!
I know I said that at the top, but clearly that’s not the case.
This is another way to track your energy, and just like doing an energy audit you can keep things in whatever way feels good.
Just be open to change and come in with the intention to create space for yourself in your life for the things on your for real todo lists.
And even some Always drains are worth it! Honestly, I find family vacations pretty consistently draining, it’s a lot of work! Travel, kids, dog travel/care, logistics, planes, trains, and definitely automobiles. But I also love time with my family which is a huge Never drain when I stay present to it. Yes, you can shift your intention to shift columns, sometimes that’s all it takes.
Question
Leave in the comments:
Before even doing the exercise, what’s one thing you know is on your list and how would you Reduce, Remove, or Replace it?
PS: If you want a better book on staying organized as a leader, entrepreneur, or really anyone who juggles a few things, I can’t recommend Zen to Done highly enough. It transformed my productivity and helped me create boundaries which led to more ease, peace, and happiness in my daily work.
Marc Scheff, Life Designer
Marc Scheff works with people to design lives beyond what they think is possible. As a child he saw first hand what shifts in perspective and mindset can create even against difficult odds. He now dedicates his time to working with high-level creators and entrepreneurs to create well beyond the success they've had and into the success they've dreamed about. His purpose is to unleash creativity, and he has had the distinct pleasure of doing with work with a healthcare exec, a museum curator, an advisor to the president, and hundreds more.
