Written by: Leticia DeSuze, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
“Action is a great restorer and builder of confidence. Inaction is not only the result, but the cause, of fear.”– Norman Vincent Peale.
As a mindset and business coach, one of the biggest barriers I see with my clients is the lack of confidence, and it’s usually when they are embarking on something new. The lack of confidence and fear can be so real that it’s paralyzing. This has also been one of the greatest challenges I have overcome. Below I have shared these 10 steps to develop ‘unstoppable confidence.’ I used these in my work, and I have learned to put them into practice in my own life over time.
1. Start with courage.
Many people believe they can’t accomplish something because they lack confidence. Confidence usually comes through mastery. Mastery comes through repeated practice. It is very normal to lack confidence -- especially when you’re doing something new. Courage is a great substitute. You simply take action repeatedly until your confidence is developed.
2. Understand that ‘done beats perfect.’
If you find yourself procrastinating, you're simply afraid. The greatest fear in the beginning is usually tied to other people’s opinions which is a fear of judgment. People will always have opinions. However, their opinions aren’t necessarily true.
It’s more important to remain laser-focused on your vision and not on other people, or you will quickly get derailed. Discipline yourself to get things done – not perfect - by only focusing on the next step. Do the best with what you have right now.
3. Prioritize your self-care.
Self-care should be a top priority. When you’re doing anything new, your subconscious mind will kick into overdrive, and all of your fears may surface While this is perfectly normal, having a self-care routine in place to manage it will be largely helpful.
Self-care consists of giving yourself what you need on a regular and consistent basis. This includes eating well, exercising, nurturing and supportive relationships, spiritual practices, and protecting your time and energy. It also includes giving yourself breaks when you need them. When you have a self-care routine, it’ll help you develop the resilience necessary to pursue your goals.
4. Get help to accelerate your growth.
Personal growth precedes all other growth. So many people downplay it, but your mindset matters most and needs to be regularly developed. Whether you’re doing that with a coach, via books and podcasts, a support group, or even through something as rigorous as strength training – getting help outside of yourself will strengthen you for the journey and create the mindset necessary for sustainable success. You don’t have to go it alone.
5. Celebrate every win.
When you’re someone who lacks confidence, you will typically see what’s wrong with yourself instead of what’s right. You will also tend to minimize your accomplishments as if they’re not a big deal. So even though celebrating your wins might feel cringeworthy - do it anyway! Celebrating your wins will show other people what’s possible. It will also get you into the habit of thinking and speaking well about yourself.
6. Reframe how you see failure.
Failure to meet our goals does not make us personal failures. Because we often tie failure to our self-worth, we internalize it and make it mean something about us personally. It does not. It means you have an opportunity to learn, grow and pivot. It’s actually a great way to get feedback and make needed changes. Fail as often as you can and see it as a shortened path to success.
7. Never compare yourself to others.
Comparison leads to despair. We tend to compare our worst to others’ best. You are in your own lane. Your only competition is you. Focus on becoming a better version of yourself each day and be unconcerned with others’ journeys. You are uniquely designed to do what you do in the way that you do it – even if there are a gazillion other people who do the exact same thing. They are not you, and therein lies your advantage.
8. Finish what you start.
It’s easy to start. However, it takes mental stamina and endurance to finish. Most of what we call failure is actually us stopping. Stop stopping yourself and keep going until you reach your goals — no matter the difficulty.
Conversely, learn to quit when it’s time. Although it might seem like the opposite of finishing what you start – it’s not. There is a difference between not finishing something because you stopped and quitting when you are going in a direction that no longer serves you. How will you know the difference? Trust that when it no longer feels right, it isn’t right.
9. Repair self-trust.
It’s been said that the most successful people make decisions quickly. However, many of us don’t trust ourselves to make the decisions necessary or handle the responsibility that comes with success. Perhaps you’ve made a ton of decisions that wreaked havoc in your life in some way, and you’re afraid to try again. Making decisions is the only way to repair self-trust. If you make a wrong decision, simply make another one. Eventually, you will gain the wisdom and insight necessary to make good decisions from the beginning, but it takes practice.
10. Commit to getting better.
Every version of a product eventually gets outdated, and what was once all the rave becomes a distant memory. This is also what happens to people when they don’t continually hone their skills. You are your biggest and best investment. Continue to get better. Continue to learn. Continue to grow. Never settle for what’s comfortable or convenient, and you will always have a competitive edge.
Leticia DeSuze, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Leticia DeSuze is a holistic mindset coach and business strategist who works with C-level executives and established entrepreneurs who desire to break the 7-figure barrier. Having coached more than 1200 senior leaders and entrepreneurs across multiple industries, Leticia believes that every problem is a mindset problem and that mindset matters most. Leticia has developed a 'laser-like' ability to pierce the facades and identify the deeply engrained thought patterns that have limited her clients' potential, and identify opportunities for accelerated growth. She helps them clearly define what they want and designs the roadmap to get there - while holding them accountable. The result is a life and business they've intentionally created vs. one they've settled for.