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Hope For The Holidays – Navigating Festivities When You Are Not Expecting

Written by: Ashley Holmes, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.

Executive Contributor Ashley Holmes

The holidays can be emotionally triggering when you are trying to conceive and are not expecting a baby yet, or have endured miscarriage(s) or infant loss. The gaping hole in your heart can feel raw and surreal as the future you envisioned has not come to fruition. Fake it ‘til you make it, isn’t even an option as you can barely plaster a smile on your face in public.

 Girl getting unexpected result from pregnancy test

The unspoken grief of infertility and pregnancy loss often goes unnoticed and unacknowledged during the holidays. Your heart simply isn’t in it, so why do you have to pretend that it is?

Simply put – you don’t.

You have full permission to be selfish and do the holidays differently in a way that honors your energy and needs. You get to set boundaries that serve you and change your plans last minute if necessary, whether it’s arriving late or leaving early. You don’t owe anyone an in-depth explanation or the vulnerable truth unless they are a cherished part of your inner circle.

Let this holiday season be a time to free yourself of expectations and obligations and choose what serves you best in the moment. Imagine a quieter and calmer Christmas that is exactly what your nervous system has been seeking so that you can tap back into feeling like you again.

Trying to conceive is draining and depleting all of your systems, so why not move through the holidays with the peace and grace you deserve? Stop putting your needs and desires last and continuously trying to pour from an empty cup. Treat your mind, body, and spirit like the sacred vessel it is instead so that your cup is overflowing and you have an infinite capacity to give wholeheartedly. Being consciously aware that you can have the energy, health, and vitality you are searching for by reducing the amounts of sweets, beverages, and late nights you partake in.

Every moment you have the choice to consciously create the feeling and reality you desire or the unconscious route of taking the path of least resistance and not being any closer to achieving your goals. I offer these best practices to implement this holiday season to put your health and well-being at the forefront of your fertility journey.

  1. Choose to prioritize yourself this holiday season.

  2. You are worth it and your needs matter so honor them.

  3. Create new traditions that honor your time and energy that are uplifting and elevating for you.

  4. Leave the comparison, judgment, and ‘shoulds’ at the door as they are unwelcome visitors and hinder your mental and emotional well-being.

  5. Remember the one act that lit you up the most as a child and cultivate that energy and vibration into this holiday season.

  6. Embody sacred self-care rituals to replenish your mind, body, and spirit.

  7. Unconditional self-compassion and grace for being exactly where you are in this present moment.

Know that if you are struggling this holiday season you are not alone and that seeking help isn’t a sign of weakness, but rather inner strength and resilience to resolve to find inner peace and joy.

If the holiday season is challenging for you I invite you to participate in our Holiday Harmony Virtual Yoga Retreat Saturday December 16 at 9:00 AM PST. Enjoy this wellness experience (which includes TaiChi Yoga Flow, Face Yoga, Yin Yoga and a Yoga Nidra meditation with Sacred Sound Bowl Ceremony) from the comfort of your own home. Reserve your spot here.

Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info!

Ashley Holmes Brainz Magazine

Ashley Holmes, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Ashley Holmes is the CEO and founder of Holistic Fertility Coach Inc., a Registered Yoga Teacher; a meditation guide; an Ayurvedic health and wellness educator; a Reiki practitioner second degree; and an international best-selling author. Her passion for customizing yoga, meditation, chakras, ayurveda, and Reiki empowers women to come back into balance and alignment to heal themselves and conceive with ease. She uses this energy medicine to support women struggling with infertility to help them conceive naturally by healing their womb. She has been blessed with twins and a miracle baby and is fulfilling her passion and purpose by offering what the traditional medical world does not – mind, body and spirit.



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