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Development Of Potential Vs Self-Optimisation Mania

Written by: Jérôme Rey, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight thin their area of expertise.

Executive Contributor Jérôme Rey

I can still feel the positive after-effects of my last retreat in Egypt, where I spent the whole day in nature, at the seaside. I had many wonderful encounters with free dolphins during that time. Words can hardly describe what can happen when you come into contact with these extraordinary creatures. Anyone who gets involved with the high-frequency vibrations of these unique creatures can experience the beauty and uniqueness of every encounter. Dolphins and whales can open the space of feeling in us the realm beyond our mind. They remind us of our beauty and marvellous natural essence, if we can really allow this within ourselves. 

Busy young smiling businesswoman with six arms doing different type of work in office.

I feel that invitation to surrender to the flow of life, without pressure to perform, to embody the magic of being and simply live! 

I ask you, if you feel the call, to meet these wonderful beings with the utmost mindfulness and respect and not just go for it because it's on your bucket list. Unfortunately, the dolphins' quality of life is being affected by increasing mass tourism, which significantly restricts their habitats. I recommend getting in touch with providers who take alternative approaches to encountering these fascinating creatures. You can find corresponding offers on my website.

You may be wondering what this has to do with developing your potential.

At a time in which even personal development has drifted into becoming an industry and often also into a mania of self-optimisation. 

Where inner images are fuelled that the ultimate in freedom is "independent" financial success. We are supposed to achieve goals and gain self-confidence in the process and then we have made it we are "successful". Those who have got there know it, but even when they realise that chasing after more and more hasn't really benefited them internally, it is hard for them to admit it to themselves. Even when they finally realise it and look for support, most of them are not really listened to. 

"Maybe I just need to make a little more effort and improve my mindset. Getting up at five in the morning, after a cup of hot water, breathwork, followed by ice baths, sport, meditation, visualising my freest version, eating a vegan diet, that's how I could do it, isn't it?" This is the modern version of a successful, independent and even spiritually aware person, right?

Unfortunately, this is probably more of an expression of a way of functioning that drives us into madness rather than into freedom. Even those who have realised that we as a modern society have obviously manoeuvred ourselves into a dead end often (unconsciously) try to change things with the same deficit-driven consciousness.

Please don't get me wrong, the approaches mentioned above can provide us with positive effects in the short term, but they can only have a lasting effect in the long term if we identify the true causes of our suffering, tackle the root of the problem and address our most fundamental relationship issues.

The development of potential is a natural ability that is inherent in every human being. The environment plays a decisive role in developing these potentials optimally.

These are the consequences of ideas that have led to the belief that we humans need to be educated from a very young age to become good people. And good people are productive people. Those who make a real effort and learn a lot of discipline can become something. It is the consequences of an idea that the stronger one prevails, that we develop our greatest potential when we compete and measure ourselves against each other.

It is possible that this will lead to higher performance in some areas, or at least that is how it might appear. We are flying to the moon, to ever new horizons, but the question is at what price and what are we even looking for out there? 

It's a game that appears to drive us forward, but in reality leaves us running on the spot. It makes many people deeply unfulfilled and unhappy, creates considerable stress in the nervous system, and even drives people into total misery. Waging wars, dominating or oppressing others are the expression of this conditioned madness. It may well be that this behaviour was beneficial to our ancestors and enabled them to survive. But it would certainly no longer be necessary today. This behaviour neither conforms to our true nature nor does it allow us to develop our higher potential. 

At present, the "hamster wheel" of modern life seems to keep spinning endlessly and many have become so used to it that it seems impossible to find a way out. Solutions are automatically sought via the same old (neuronal) pathways. 

Previous generations have undoubtedly done their best. They have ensured that we today have sufficient food and, in general, constant access to an abundance of matter. Ok, wonderful, yet in some way we seem to have missed out on something, don't we? 

Surely we should be happier than ever because we have everything we need?

It seems that we as a society have overlooked something fundamentally essential.

What can we learn from this now?

It is worth pausing for a moment and reflecting on what we really need to be happy as human beings.

Recent findings in neuroscience show that most neuronal connections in the brain occur when we perform activities with joy and without obsessively striving for a specific goal, especially when there are no external constraints.

We develop our greatest potential through curiosity and co-operation. 

As children, we already had the ability to discover the world through play, even before we were taught by adults what they considered life to be. Comparatively, little happens in the brain when we memorise things or are forced to perform tasks. We may then be "good" and diligent pupils. However, this gradually suffocates our creativity and motivation. Today we are experiencing the consequences of years of suppression of natural impulses and needs.

Yet inner motivation is of great importance in learning processes. When people do things that really interest and excite them, a more intensive and sustainable neurobiological activation takes place. When we do what we really like, we get a good physical feeling, feel a zest for life and can be present in the here and now. We experience a good connection with our own self and the world around us, which automatically leads to an improved quality of life.

Community and relationships

The importance of community and supportive relationships is essential for realising our potential and for developing at all levels. Social interactions, empathy and love are crucial for neurobiological development. A supportive community and positive relationships not only create an environment that fosters individual abilities, but also contribute significantly to emotional stability and psychological well-being.

This synergistic combination of community, relationships and individual development thus creates a thriving environment that helps to realise your full potential at all levels.

Stress and anxiety

Stress and anxiety have a negative impact on brain development and the realisation of our potential. In stressful situations, our nervous system switches to "survival mode", whereby neocortical functions are reduced to enable our organism to react "defensively" such as fight, flight or freeze. 

Every person has their own unique potential! Authentic and safe relationships are the key to supporting this development in the best possible way. This allows individual abilities to blossom in a unique way. This not only contributes to the true fulfilment of each individual, but also to the diversity and development of society as a whole!

Nowadays, we are intensely preoccupied with countless problems that manifest themselves in the external environment, neglecting the fact that it is basically almost always about these life issues within us. 

We believe that we have to do a lot in order to survive. If we don't perform to the best of our ability, our existence is at stake! We have been taught this consciously or unconsciously since our earliest childhood and it is still being hypnotised to us every day through the media.

Human arguments often revolve around who is right or who is considered "right" or "better". Some have learnt to remain silent, others to assert themselves and the winner is the one who can influence the most people. In politics and business, it is often accepted that this can also be done through skilful manipulation.

This is not a major step forward in development compared to our ancestors. A competition-based climate automatically means that stress and fear are prevalent. 

Since the discovery of the polyvagal theory by Steven Porges, we have sufficient scientific evidence as to why, in such an environment, the development of potential is inhibited, physical stress develops and the likelihood of various physical and mental illnesses increases significantly.

From a psychological perspective, these effects are often the result of traumatised child aspects in our personality that continue to find expression as we grow into adulthood. As a result, we tend to slip into either the role of the victim or of the victimiser. The perpetrators often find themselves in top positions in our society, while those who have not made it to the top are forced into the role of victims and have to settle for less. 

And this is supposed to reflect our true potential as humanity?

From the perspective of a trauma therapist, it can be stated: we are a traumatised society that perceives these conditions as normal, as most of us have never experienced how things could be different.

Nevertheless, more and more people are harbouring the desire for change, which is already a promising start.

However, the majority are not aware that they are largely controlled by their subconscious programmes. In this state, accidents, physical or mental illnesses, conflicts and separations are regarded as random events. They (still) lack the inner awareness to recognise a correlation between their inner experience and external events. As long as everything runs smoothly, the suffering of this person remains minimal.

There is also a level of consciousness at which you realise that you are unconscious. In this phase, suffering is often perceived more intensely, as the person realises that what is happening to them must have something to do with themselves. 

At this stage we are confronted with our negative relationship patterns and we become aware of the conditioning from our childhood. Forms of therapy such as floating (more information on my website), NARM and systemic constellations can help us to free ourselves from the associated identifications.

And then there are the awakened ones, the very few who have developed consciousness to see the perfection of life in all things, to feel the love and goodness of creation and to carry deep inner peace within themselves.

Today's society ultimately reflects our collective consciousness. It is an expression of a profound insecurity and alienation from the world of nature to which we actually belong.

If we suddenly realised that we are wonderful metaphysical beings who have inner impulses in which we can trust. Impulses that accompany us through life and take us to the right place at the right time. 

This is usually a challenge for us adults, as these impulses, also known as intuition, have often been successfully suppressed through upbringing and education. As a result, many decisions are not really made from within, self-confidence is low and the majority of us feel at the mercy of life or society.

We could, however, become curious again as adults and see the world and our lives as a wonderful gift that we can discover more and more deeply, free from stress and fear. We could develop into adults who allow themselves to be led from within, from our hearts, and we could then experience ourselves as coherent and competent to act. We would step out of the victim-perpetrator consciousness, as this game would simply no longer make sense. 

In this change of consciousness, we would realise that as adults we can fulfil our needs in a different way. 

Within this new perspective, we might come across politicians who would create something new in their party manifestos by shifting the focus away from pure economic growth to healing on a relational level. 

We might then realise that instead of fighting about who is more right, whose idea, opinion and vision is better, we could first talk about how we really feel. We could finally talk about what we have suppressed since childhood, that we feel insecure, angry, anxious, sad or happy. And if we were then to experience the healing effect of really paying attention to ourselves, i.e. really listening to each other, we could experience how beneficial this can be!

We would suddenly feel seen and recognised and could then realise that this creates more closeness and security between us humans. 

And suddenly we would realise that we are dealing with vulnerable human beings and that we are ultimately looking for the same thing. That is, to first feel safe and then to experience closeness and freedom. 

We would realise that we achieve safety not simply by creating rules and laws and punishing people who do not abide by them - but rather by truly taking an interest in each other, by listening to each other. Suddenly we might realise that we can get a lot further together.

By authentically sharing our feelings, we would lose any urge to attack each other. It could turn out that we suddenly find much better solutions on a mental level because our subconscious programmes are no longer busy defending our space. 

Like a virus, this could spread to all people and the whole of humanity would suddenly realise that they, we, have actually created a safe environment for each other.

People in positions of power would suddenly be allowed to feel weak and feel their sadness and loneliness and tell their fellow human beings that they actually secretly want more closeness and connection. The victims could finally take responsibility and say what they don't like. They realise that they are no longer powerless, at the mercy of other people's ideas, and that they can consciously live their freedom and autonomy.

In this scenario, we would suddenly focus on the essential things and recognise the suffering of an individual as a reflection of the whole. As a community, we would take care of it until a balance is restored. We would stop simply looking away and thinking that the plight of others is none of our business. We could focus all our energies on ensuring that everyone finds their place both in our families and on the big political stage of countries and continents.

For individual and collective peace, freedom and the realisation of potential, we must therefore become responsible adults who remember the joy of playful discovery!

It is up to each and every one of us to break free from the headiness of modern life, to let go of outdated thought patterns and instead choose the path of joy, curiosity and cooperation. This realisation could contribute to a collective transformation that allows us to become responsible creators of a more harmonious and fulfilling world.

Sooner or later we will remember our true nature. What we really are, awakening in the light of consciousness, is what I feel very deeply in my heart... and I try to live it every day and inspire others with it!

Some call me naive, a dreamer with utopian fantasies, others feel inspired and recognise themselves more and more free and connected with the flow of life.

We can continue like this with "always the same" or learn to live from a different consciousness. There we could finally experience what I claim we are all looking for:

Deep peace, love and the bliss of embodying a part of life! 

We can start at any time. Start to experience the special contemplative atmosphere of this time of the year. We could pay more loving attention to the people around us, actively listen to them and find the courage to communicate with them honestly. In this way, we can feel a deep, healing connection and develop our human potential together. I sincerely wish this for all of us.

Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube and visit my website for more info!

Jérôme Rey Brainz Magazine

Jérôme Rey, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Jérôme is undoubtedly a charismatic and passionate holistic therapist of the new age! At the heart of his work is: Live and embody your essence – He draws on decades of his own personal experiences with shamans, healers and therapists as well as years of experience in dealing with trauma. His profound knowledge is based on extensive training in the field of trauma therapy and spirituality. This broad spectrum of personal experience and professional knowledge forms the basis of his professional work and enables him to accompany people on their path of healing and personal growth.



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