Let’s Talk About Death, and Therefore Life
- 5 days ago
- 8 min read
Sara has a unique ability to quickly shift energy into presence and joy through her work as a mindfulness coach, speaker, and yoga instructor. She is also the author of the book One With Nature (published in 2025) and a popular speaker in the field.
If you are afraid to talk about death, you might also ask yourself whether you are afraid to live. Death and life are, after all, deeply connected. When I give lectures, and my lectures include conversations about death, it is fascinating how many smiles and bursts of laughter fill the room during that hour. Even though there may also be moments of tears and many emotions, the room always feels somehow much warmer, more harmonious, and filled with more joy by the end of the lecture than it was at the beginning.
This happens precisely because of what unfolds when we choose to open the doors that feel uncomfortable, when we dare to talk about what we so often prefer to silence, and above all, when we choose to see death as a natural part of life and as a guide to truly living fully. From the heart, in love and togetherness.
Because that is also what death can do: bring us closer together and create community. It pushes us to our very limits, and in those moments, we need each other. Suddenly, that job, those material things, or the constant need to perform no longer feel quite so important. Death has a way of clearing everything away, back to what truly matters, and in doing so, it shows us the way back to ourselves.
When we lose the ones we love
The loss of both of my parents taught me an incredible number of things. One of them was gratitude. Even though I had lost the two most important people in my life, I could still feel gratitude for life itself. Something else happened that made that gratitude even stronger. I found a deeper connection with myself. A sense of security that tells me I am always held and always safe. There was, of course, an abundance of grief, pain, and tears, and it was precisely that which allowed me to arrive at gratitude and a sense of safety. That happened because I allowed myself to be released from the pain.
Grief does not ask to be solved
Grief and pain can feel heavy and very lonely. Sometimes pain is the only thing we have left of a person, and so we hold on to it. Because it reminds us of them, again and again. It can feel terrifying, even impossible, to imagine life without that person, and therefore without that pain. But here is something I have come to understand: holding on to the pain does not keep them closer. Letting go does not mean forgetting. It means freeing yourself to carry them with you in a different way, through love rather than through suffering.
You need to release your grip in order to free yourself. When you do, you may find that they are still with you, just in a lighter, gentler way.
When the old must die, so the new can be born
I am not here just so we can talk about physical death. Sometimes death is not only about the physical passing from this life. Sometimes we need a kind of “death” in order to truly live.
What do I mean by that? The old version of you, your past, and that story you repeat to yourself over and over again. You know the one, the story that makes you feel bad, fills you with anxiety, and keeps you living a life that is not the life you want to live. The masks and facades you carry need to die so that you can be reborn.
This shedding is not a loss, it is a homecoming. It is a journey from death to life, from darkness to light, from pain to love, and within that journey, there is also a passage from despair to hope. Ultimately, a life of happiness.
What nature already knows
If you have read my articles before, you know how deeply I believe in the wisdom of nature. This article is no exception, because if there is one thing nature truly understands, it is that we are born and we die. Everything is impermanent. Everything has its cycle. Everything is alive, and everything is in constant transformation. A leaf does not resist falling. A season does not mourn its ending. They simply trust the cycle, and so can we.
This is something I wrote in my book One With Nature. "Nature understands the challenges of existence. She knows that hardships can feel unbearable, yet she also knows the immense joy of simply being alive. I invite you to welcome both the highs and lows of life as part of the journey. See them all as doors that open you up to living, both the bitter and the sweet. The choice is yours: you can view the world as a palace or as a prison."
Perhaps that is the invitation death extends to us as well, not to frighten us, but to ask us, "Will you truly live, starting now?"
A life fully lived
So this is why we need conversations about death in order to truly live. They help us understand that everything is impermanent, that living in the present moment is not a luxury, it is a necessity. That every single day holds within it the possibility of a fresh beginning. You can start over every day. You just have to decide to and ask yourself: How do I want to live? Who do I want to be?
Appreciate life. The big moments and the small ones. Do not wait. Because you do not know if tomorrow will come.
You should not live a life in which you doubt whether you are enough or whether you are loved. You should know that you are. Not because someone told you so, but because you have done the courageous work of looking inward and choosing yourself.
That is truly what life has taught me. My greatest teachers have been the grief and the pain that I transformed into wisdom, into love, into strength, and into a deeper understanding of what it means to be human. Because on the other side of pain, if we are willing to walk through it rather than around it, there is something unexpected waiting: more life, more love.
So let us talk more about death, together. Therefore, about life. Be curious. Be brave enough to open the door.
Eight steps to become more comfortable with death, and therefore, with life
Start the conversation: Talk about death with a friend, a family member, or a colleague. It does not have to be a deep or heavy conversation. Simply beginning is enough.
Sit with the discomfort: Notice what happens in your body when the subject comes up. Perhaps a sudden urge to change the subject, to lighten the mood, or to look away. Whatever comes up, simply observe it without judgment. You do not have to fix it or push it away. Discomfort is not a stop sign, it is an invitation to go deeper.
Reflect on your own life: Ask yourself, "How do I want to live?" Who do I want to be? Am I living in alignment with that? You do not need all the answers. All you need is the willingness to begin exploring.
Go into nature: Let nature remind you of life’s cycles. Watch the seasons change, notice a leaf falling, and feel the ground beneath your feet. Let her slow you down and bring you back to the present moment. She does not worry about yesterday or tomorrow. She simply is. So are you. Remember that you are not separate from nature, you are a part of her. You belong to the same cycles, the same rhythm, the same great flow of life. In that belonging, there is a quiet but profound reminder: you are never truly alone.
Get curious: Explore the subject. Read books, listen to podcasts, and seek out conversations and perspectives on death and dying. The more familiar the subject becomes, the less power fear has over you. Curiosity is one of the most courageous things you can choose.
Talk to your parents: If your parents are still alive, ask them the questions you truly want answers to. Ask them about life, about love, about what they have learned. Ask them about death. It is a gift to be able to do so. Do not wait. If you, like me, no longer have your parents here, or perhaps never had that closeness, know that the conversation does not have to end there. You can still talk to them. Whether you believe they are in heaven or simply that love does not disappear when someone does, speak to them. Write them a letter. Say the words out loud to yourself. It may feel strange at first, but there is something deeply releasing about it. Because some conversations heal us, even when the other person is no longer physically there to hear them.
Remind yourself you are never alone: Grief can feel incredibly isolating. But you are not alone in this. Every single human being on this earth carries loss, fear, and questions about life and death. We are all in this together. Reach out. Let someone in. Allow yourself to be held by a friend, a community, or simply the knowledge that what you feel is deeply, universally human.
Choose life, every day: This is perhaps the most important step of all. It is a choice, one you make not once, but every single morning when you open your eyes. Ask yourself, "What am I grateful for today?" It does not have to be something big. The warmth of your coffee. The light is coming through the window. A message from someone you love. Gratitude is not about pretending everything is perfect. It is about training yourself to find the light, even on the darker days. So start a practice. Write down at least three things you are grateful for each morning, or each evening before you sleep. Let it become a ritual. A daily reminder that life, with all its uncertainty and depth, is still a gift. That you, simply by being here, are enough. You are loved. You have a choice in how you meet this day.
Let’s connect
If this resonated with you and you feel curious to explore more, you are warmly welcome to connect with me. I also invite you to explore my book One With Nature, a deeper journey into the wisdom nature holds for all of us. Above all, enjoy the experience of being alive.
Connect with me on Instagram and through my website for more inspiration on meditation, yoga, and inner harmony.
Read more from Sara Brinell
Sara Brinell, Author, Speaker & Awareness Guide
Sara is an expert in inner harmony and the healing power of nature. She carries a profoundly healing story, having experienced depression in her teenage years and, later in life, the early loss of both her parents. These experiences became part of a deeper journey that eventually led her to guide others back to their hearts through her work as a yoga instructor, mindfulness coach, and speaker. She also shares her insights through her book One With Nature. Her mission is to show that loneliness can become a path to deeper connection, and that nature can heal where words are not enough.
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