Written by: Deborah Garratt , Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Stigmas from the Past For most of you reading this, you are old enough to remember how divorced women over forty were depicted in the ’60s and ’70s. They were classified as failures relating to femininity, family, and morality. This list contains the most important things in life or what society perceived them to be. As a child, my first recollection of older, divorced women was from television. Even in the ’70s, in the midst of the feminist movement, this was seldom spoken phenomenon. Although divorce was becoming more and more common by then, it was still considered tawdry and came with a stigma that was both humiliating and alienating. The Blame Game The circumstances or chain of events that caused the end of marriage were not important. In many cases, the wives were characterized as the main culprit regardless of the circumstances. When the husband cheated or left his wife for another woman, people still blamed the wife for the marriage's unraveling. Perhaps if she had lost 20 pounds, kept a cleaner home, or had dinner on the table at exactly 6:00 every night, he wouldn’t have strayed. When the wife chose to work outside of the home, society would often blame that for the marriage's demise. Due to the above-mentioned reasons, she was putting her own career and selfish needs over the betterment of her marriage and family. The perception of divorced women back then was that they were somehow deeply flawed. Why else would her marriage not stay intact? She must be emotionally unbalanced, frigid, or just not wife material. Not only did women go through financial devastation, but also they found themselves being labeled by society, including their family and friends. There was a huge price to pay that took years to recover from, including rebuilding their lives, reputation, and financial stability. The High Price of Leaving In many ways, the fallout for women today going through a divorce is the same now as it was then. I left my husband about 10 years ago; I had more than enough reasons to do so, yet I took all of the blame. A friend tried to warn me that my children, family, and friends would view me as the bad guy if I left. She recommended that I stay and make him so miserable that he will eventually leave. Then I can play the victim card, and everyone will blame my husband for the breakup of our happy family. In my naiveté, I couldn’t fathom this actually happening. After all, this wasn’t 1972, and I had good relationships with my daughters, family, and friends. Boy, was I ever wrong? Even though my reasons for leaving were valid and there was never a third party involved, I absolutely took the blame. I suffered insurmountable losses both financially and emotionally. In many ways, I went through exactly what the courageous women before me did, complete alienation from my daughters, and family, and so-called friends. Ultimately, People blamed me, and like in most cases they thought they had to choose a side. Needless to say, most of my relationships did not withstand the divorce. The Unraveling I understand more than most the fallout and pain that comes along with divorce later in life. It takes courage and blind faith that you will eventually come out the other side happier, wiser, and stronger. Over fifty is a difficult age to face the process of divorce and the uncertainty that comes with it. In many ways, this goes against human development and societal expectations. This is supposed to be when you’re just starting to enjoy the empty nest, have the time and desire to rekindle your relationship, and finally, retirement is around the corner. Unfortunately, going through separation and divorce destroys all of that. Many marriages fall apart during this time due to simply growing apart. I had a friend years ago whose parents had been married for almost thirty years. Her father was an airline pilot and therefore was seldom home. Her mother always joked that when her husband retired that she would have to leave. They had four children, and she felt that the children were the only things they had in common anymore. Sure enough, he retired, and she up and left about four months later. The Perils of Dating At about this age, we realize that if we are going to pursue happiness, it needs to be now. We come to grips that we aren’t getting any younger and that time stands still for no one. It is hard enough to be single in today's world when you’re young yet alone in your 50’s and 60’s. Let’s face it; when it comes to dating at our age, there are not many good fish left in the sea. So many of us decide after fishing for a while that it’s not worth the effort or disappointment of trying to catch a keeper. Let’s face it; we all come with baggage and a passport full of stamps from life’s experiences, both good and bad. The hard part is finding someone whose baggage can coincide or complement ours. At this stage in life, we need to accept each other’s past, appreciate what we have and find the courage to try it once again. It is possible to find love, and for many couples, this last love is their greatest. Finding your New Tribe After a failed attempt at fishing, some turn their attention to other things. We take up hobbies that we’ve always meant to but never quite found the time or desire. Suddenly we find ourselves with nothing but time. The adult children that we successfully launched into the world seem to be so entrenched in it that we seldom hear from them anymore. All of the married friends we once had are suddenly busy and obviously sympathetic but only from a safe distance. This leaves us with few options. The reality is that we need to make new friends, preferably with other single women our age that still know how to have fun. Our goal is not to form a pity party consisting of jaded, bitter divorced women. There are plenty of those to be found, but we need to avoid them at all costs for our sanity and spiritual well-being. Take Action I want you to know that there is life after fifty and divorce. It might not be the life we planned or dreamed of, but it is ours. I have more respect for the brave women that reach out for happiness than those that hold back from fear. I used to have a lot of friends that took the latter path. Some were miserably married, sleeping in separate rooms, but neither one miserable enough to take action. Taking action like marriage counseling or separation would be embarrassing, expensive, and messy. And they are right, but it is the only way to come back to yourself and with a lot of hard work to each other. Your Own Path For my sisters who are contemplating divorce or for those who have already embarked on the journey, I want you to know that I see who and what you are. Even if the rest of the world or even the people closest to you can’t, I do. Please don’t forget that if you are on the right path for yourself that is reason enough. I promise that the strength, faith, and resilience you’ve proven not only to yourself but others have made a difference. By taking the journey to find self-love, happiness, and a new life, we have inspired and empowered other women, especially those brave enough to follow in our footsteps. Coming Back to You We should be thankful for the women who made the beaten path before us with their tears, resolve, and hope. We are a sisterhood, and we need to support each other with compassion, respect, and honesty. I will not tell you that the journey you’ve chosen will be an easy one because it won’t be. But I am here to tell you that you are not alone and that in the end, you will have self-respect, perhaps finally love yourself and realize that you are far stronger than you ever imagined. These accomplishments are what really matters in life, and sadly for most women, they will never achieve a single one. I honestly think that we are the chosen ones to push ourselves to heal, grow and eventually come back to love. I am a proud member of this club, and we welcome you with loving and supportive arms. Follow Deborah on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest and visit her website for more information! Deborah Garratt, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Deborah Garratt is an inspirational leader for women over forty. Her personal story is one of insurmountable loss, followed by redemption and hope. She had to completely reinvent herself in her fifties and has dedicated her life to helping other women do the same. She empowers "women in full bloom" to own their personal journey and embrace this amazing stage in life. Deborah uses intuitive coaching and spiritual arts to elevate her clients and all women in full bloom. She is a published blogger, executive contributor, public speaker, and a powerful truth-teller for women.

Written by: Marie Hernandez, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. They say your life has started the moment you were born. For me, my life started at 50. I screwed up the first 50 years of my life. Struggling with depression, so many negative thoughts, and the constant darkness at the end of the tunnel consumed me. For the longest time, I didn’t know what I was doing with my life. The details of how everything happened were a blur. All I remember is, I have always loved traveling. Seeing different parts of the world seems to take away the bitterness in life and instills me with new energy. When I first started sharing my travels, I didn’t know what to expect. My passion for traveling prompted me to reach out to sponsors. Then, I received my very first sponsored travel when I had less than 1,000 followers on all my social media platforms combined. A lot has happened since then. I have found my voice through countless nights of working up a marketing plan, trials, and errors. To date, I have traveled to 54 countries with more than $500,000 worth of sponsorships. From skydiving, spending an hour with Rwandan Gorillas to private dinners on yachts, and hot air balloon trips over vineyards in Tuscany, I have experienced it all. It has been a very long time since I have reached out to sponsors. They come to me. My achievements in the sponsored travel world validate my effort and dedication. Now, I absolutely love my life. My life started with my sponsored travel journey. Using my online presence to exchange for travel experiences is the greatest joy in life. It is not only the travel experience itself. There is so much more to it. I have helped my sponsors successfully market their brands with my strategies, met brilliant entrepreneurs, and collaborated with some of the most exciting businesses around the world. To help others experiencing the struggles I had, I started teaching everything I know about sponsored travel. Since it is a highly specialized and unique niche that no coach has really touched on before, I was convinced I could make a great influence and help digital entrepreneurs. And I was right. Students in my Mastermind are making their investment back in a short time and landing their dream sponsorships after joining my Mastering Sponsored Travel Mastermind . I’m proud to say that most members of my group have developed such a deep bond that we are long-term friends. To encourage aspiring digital entrepreneurs, I have a lively and engaging Facebook community, Seriously Travel Tribe , for everyone to join. Members can discuss their business plans and seek advice on it. I also hop in often for a live session to share some invaluable tips in pitching to your sponsors or marketing yourself. Every day, I wake up to seeing new sign-ups to my Mastermind, reading new offers my students got, and their collaboration to scale up their online businesses. Sponsored travel has changed my life and the lives of those who believe in me and support me. I have so much knowledge to share so those walking down my old path could fly away from mistakes and reach for the moon. I’m grateful to be in this amazing niche. For more info, follow me on Facebook , Instagram , LinkedIn and visit my web site ! Read more fro m Marie ! Marie Hernandez, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Marie Hernandez is a women's empowerment and digital entrepreneur business coach. After a devastating divorce at 50 that left her jobless, 10 thousand miles away from family, with 16 cents in the bank, she knew she needed to rewire her thinking. She has dedicated her life to the service of women who want to become empowered to alter the course of their lives. The owner and CEO of Marie Hernandez Coaching, LLC., she travels, lives, and works globally and offers women’s empowerment coaching programs that help women 45+ bridge the gap from where they are to a place of love and strength and live any life they choose. Download her free workbook " Rewrite Your Life Story ," which will help guide you to understanding the lies we believe and shift your mindset from limited to "anything is possible."

Written by: Kim Conway, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. What do you believe about your ability to access your soul? How does it feel to be touched by your soul? How do you know what you feel comes from your soul? For so many of us, the concept of our souls and spirits is vague and confusing. So often, we turn to religion to understand the soul. Yet, I never received an answer that gave me clarity. I wanted to know my own soul! This led me down a path of spiritual awakening and a desire to learn how to blend with my soul. I believe this occurred spontaneously during time spent in meditation. My meditations would often take me on journeys, and over time, I began to feel the blend of my soul. So powerful and exciting! Is it love Love that you feel, When you are connected To your own soul? This is real For no love is too much No love is too great No love is too expansive From your soul so innate For what do you find When you look inside your soul? You find your own God Source More brilliant than gold For this is the place And this is the part That feeds you with love Straight to your heart… What is the key ingredient needed to blend with our souls? Love and joy bring us down the path leading straight to our souls! When we elevate our moods, feel love and happiness, this allows our souls to rise and blend with us. Our mysterious souls are right there, just waiting to rise as we raise our vibrations and focus on all of the love and good in our lives and the world around us. So simple, right? Blending with our souls occurs spontaneously each time we focus on love and joy! There is often confusion As to how to connect to your soul When in truth it is simple To allow the emergence to unfold For in each thing you do There exists a starting point The place where you begin Connecting to your soul begins with you and a grin So concentrate on the beating of your heart Its gentle rhythm Pulsing human life through you For your soul chose this life Filled with pleasure and strife For you to learn and grow This is a truth you must know… What do we find when we blend with our souls? Inside our souls resides our own wisdom, philosophy, and healing power. It is exciting to discover what unfolds as you blend with your soul. Accessing this wisdom occurs when we sit quietly with our souls--with no distractions. Meditation can help lead the way to this quiet space. Spending time blended with your soul will help you understand the true essence of you and all the power you hold inside yourself. How would it feel to discover the wisdom held within your soul? Perhaps it is time to know your own truth and feel the love and joy that is you. ...Notice the color Of your own brilliant light… ...And swirling and mixing In all of this color and light Is your soul brilliant and bright…. ...So for this special moment Bask in the glow Of your own soul It will feel familiar and comfortable Filled with your own truth, you will know For it holds all of your wisdom Your desires Your personal journey Of love and enlightenment… ...For now, you know how to reach Deep inside yourself And allow your soul to teach Each lesson you need to learn For your soul is brilliant and magnificent The most magnificent part of beautiful you... If you would like to be led on a meditative journey to touch your soul and hear the remainder of this poem, you can access it on my meditation album, Soul Journeys, on Spotify , iTunes , and YouTubeMusic . For more info, follow me on Facebook , Instagram and visit my websi te ! Read more from Ki m ! Kim Conway, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Kim Conway, LICSW, Coach, Medium, Reiki Master. Kim believes we all have the capacity to overcome our struggles and that our souls are the most powerful healers and our greatest guide. Her approach is spiritual, helping clients develop a relationship with their souls, which supports us in every aspect of our lives and helps us heal, evolve, and grow. She incorporates intuitive work, energy healing, and education in her soul coaching program to help you discover and know your soul for personal development, guidance, and healing. Kim is a LICSW, developed spiritual medium, and Reiki Master Teacher who offers soul coaching, mediumship, intuitive and Oracle card readings, meditations, energy healing, and spiritual and intuitive development classes. You can listen to her Podcast, Soul Inspirations, meditation album, Soul Journeys for inspiration and healing. Kim is the Entrepreneuress of Kim Conway, LLC.

Written by: Stephanie Reh, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Hiring a coach has always cost me more than I hoped it would. And it has always delivered more value than I anticipated. Make Yourself Sweat I provide online group coaching through my 6-month Focus & Momentum Goal Mastery Program . I am also in an online group coaching program, and I still remember the moment I paid to enroll the first time - that was the moment my goal fire was lit . As my coach often says, “the transformation is in the transaction.” Once you commit and you put good money behind it, you’ve taken a huge step forward and set yourself up for success. I remember years ago, at a local fundraiser luncheon, the keynote speaker implored us to write a check in an amount that would make us sweat. That advice applies to paying your coach too. In most cases, it’s got to be enough that it makes you pause. Otherwise, you don’t have enough “skin in the game.” You get out of it what you put into it, and if you start by putting in a nominal investment, you will also start by getting a nominal return. Not the best place to start. A good coach will hug you accountable and enable you to achieve the goals and dreams for which you have a burning, inescapable desire . How much is that worth to you? Let me be clear: You do not have to pay an exorbitant amount of money. Now, let me be even clearer: No matter what you pay, you will pay proportionate to the value you will get. That is because you and your coach show up according to your perception (or not) that a fair amount of money has been exchanged . My first coach offered to coach me for free. I declined that arrangement and insisted on paying him. Not only did I insist on paying him, but I also insisted he charges me at least what I was charging my private coaching clients at the time. The reason, I explained, was because the difference between a coach who is working for you and one who is doing you a favor is significant. If you are going to sign up for coaching, get your money’s worth. You’ll achieve that when neither one of you feels like you’ve been taken advantage of. When your coach feels they are being paid for the value, they are delivering. You are going to get that value. When they don’t, you won’t. Underpaid coaches will still serve you out of the goodness of their hearts, but not necessarily their souls. I want a coach who is “all in,” one who is nearly as obsessed about my ambitious goal pursuit as I am. I call this “vested support”: people who “get” you; what you need, what you want, and why you don’t have it yet, and who are personally committed to enabling your success. You should also recruit vested support you don’t pay for - from your family, friends, etc., but that doesn’t replace a paid coach who consistently dedicates their time and energy to you as agreed. I have requested or accepted free or low-cost help from people I know who genuinely want to support me on several occasions. (I’ve also offered and provided the same to others.) The consistent result is inconsistent support . That’s because they are doing me a favor, and therefore, all their other priorities come first. The less I pay, the lower priority I am. When I pay them, I become a priority. When I pay them well, I become a top priority. And since my ambitious goals are very important to me, I want someone who will make me a top priority. The only way to ensure that happens is to pay them appropriately. It’s also not fair to expect friends and family to make room for you beyond the unconditional love they already provide. And, there’s the benefit of objectivity you get from hiring a professional whose own interests aren’t impacted by yours, unlike what is often the case with your inner circle. Remember that the transformation you are seeking when you hire a coach will inevitably change you. When you change, other people around you may become uncomfortable, and they may inadvertently - or even deliberately - deter your change efforts so they can stay in their own comfort zone. Two-Way Street It’s not just the coach who holds back in the absence of fair money exchange. From the perspective of the one being coached, the difference between “I invested a lot of money in this” and “No big deal if it doesn’t work out” is also significant. That’s why $10/month gym memberships rarely result in consistent attendance unless there is already a steadfast commitment to fitness. Here’s what often happens when the coach feels underpaid, and the client didn’t wince at what they paid the coach: One or both show up late to established meetings. One or both are unprepared or underprepared. One or both are disappointed with the progress that is being made. One or both don’t really want to be there. Most typically, I would suspect, the hypothetical outcomes listed above don’t appear immediately. But it doesn’t take long for them to appear. After the initial excitement about getting started, the enthusiasm quickly wanes when it feels more like work than a calling - for one or both parties. You’re both Worthy As a coach, I have always regretted undercharging my clients. While I wanted to make the fee accessible to them, I resented it after the fact. The decision to undercharge was mine - not theirs - so I had no one to blame but myself. I convinced myself I was serving them best by lowering the rate. But that wasn’t true because I wasn’t fully serving them. It’s hard to escape the nagging feeling that I need to get back to my “other work.” when I feel the weight or pull of higher priorities, I struggle to get fully motivated for coaching sessions that are provided at a fraction of what I feel is most appropriate to charge. While I am still delivering value and the client is still deriving value from these sessions, the client isn’t getting everything I’ve got. And I’ve got a lot to give. Experienced coaches command a higher price because they can. Once they are established, they won’t even consider a discount because they are in such high demand that any 1:1 coaching they do offer will require a premium for the privilege of them carving out time for you. Good coaches are a good investment regardless of the depth of their experience. So if you do not have the funds and after exhausting all creative efforts to obtain the necessary funding to invest in your dreams, consider hiring a less experienced coach (who presumably charges less than a more experienced coach). Either way, you’ve got to pay them what they believe they're worth. Because you are worth it. For more info, follow me on Facebook , Instagram , LinkedIn and visit my web site ! Read more from Stephan ie ! Stephanie Reh, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Stephanie Reh is on a mission to help more people to serve more people. Stephanie’s aim and passion as CEO & Founder of Accountability Evangelist are to help accountable people achieve their most ambitious goals so that they can happily live a life of fulfillment and make a tremendous, positive impact on the lives of the people they choose to serve. Stephanie’s signature offering for personal transformation is the Focus & Momentum Goal Mastery online group coaching program. She specializes in Succession Planning / Leadership Development, Strategic Planning / Goal & Risk Management, and Change Management for Mergers & Acquisitions for organizational transformation. Stephanie is an active community volunteer and champion. One of Stephanie’s current priorities is to help build a thriving, diverse, and inclusive entrepreneurial community in Western New York State, USA.

Written by: Moira Hutchison, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Life-changing decisions can be overwhelming at times. You spend days and even weeks contemplating the options in front of you. All you really want to do is make the best decision, but it is stressing you out. Your gut instinct tells you to go one way, but you still hesitate. Indecisiveness can make some situations more difficult than they need to be. But what is causes indecisiveness? You are likely allowing insecurity to cloud your judgment and cause you to second-guess your intuition. Do not worry - it happens to everyone. Here is how you know intuition is guiding you in the right direction: 1. It is constantly on your mind. Your intuition pushes you to think about the impact of a decision constantly. It is difficult to get the thoughts off your mind when deep down, you know the right thing to do. Avoid underestimating the power of your intuition! 2. You feel sad when you go against your intuition. You usually feel relieved when you choose the option your intuition tells you. You feel as if a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. So, if you feel heavy after the decision, it means you may have made an unfavorable choice. It is possible to feel sad after a tough decision if there is a negative impact on others. But that sadness should go away quickly if you have made a decision that is absolutely right for you. If you have fallen victim to any of these scenarios, you are probably being impacted by insecurities: 1. You ask for the opinion of others. Usually, insecurity manifests itself in doubts. If you find yourself asking others for opinions on your potential decision, it means you are not fully convinced of it yourself. It is always okay to seek advice. However, you are grasping at straws if you are allowing opinions to take precedence over your own thoughts. Keep in mind that the opinions of others may very well be based on those people trying to fulfill their own needs. 2. You are considering the feelings of others first. When you consider how your decision can affect someone else first, chances are you are insecure about something. If you are struggling with a decision that will be life-changing for you, consider your own feelings first. Are you afraid of what others might think? Or are you concerned about how they may view you after the decision? Remember that those who love you will support you in whatever decision you know will be best for you. The opinions of others are not your priority – you are!! Your values and morals are reflected in your intuition. Once you develop a system for decision-making based on your values and morals, it is likely going to be much easier to make important decisions. After a while, you will realize that the most important opinion is your own. Embrace your decision-making abilities, so you can eliminate insecurities. You are a wonderful being who deserves to confidently go through life. Start by believing in yourself and taking bold steps based on what your instincts tell you. Follow Moira on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn. Join her Facebook Community and visit her website! Read more from Moira! Moira Hutchinson, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine As an Intuition Cultivator and Mindset Mentor, Moira Hutchison guides her clients to access the inherent power they have available when they ignite their personal trinity of trust, inner awareness, and self-confidence. Moira works with professionals who feel that there is something better in life for them, but they have no idea how to access it. However, they have a yearning to be guided by their intuition and align with their unique calling. What makes her distinctive and different in this work is that she has developed the ability to take complex energetic, and spiritual ideas and interpret them in ways that people find easy to understand, integrate and implement.

Written by: Hayden Orme, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Oscar Wilde couldn't have phrased it better when he said: “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” While this sentiment is powerful and factually accurate, it can feel challenging at times to stay true to our authentic selves, operating day after day in the virtual arena. The virtual world has perpetuated a sort of "high school mentality" to emulate and aspire to new levels of "fitting in" with new trends, popularity, and (virtual) attention. Nonetheless, it is always when authentically being oneself that you shine the brightest, virtually, or otherwise. Collectively, we have grown not just accustomed to being remote but all the benefits it affords so many of us. We now have a face pop up on the screen in front of us, at a proximity that’s much closer than would normally be considered respectful of another’s personal space. It’s also not typical to have a speed introduction to your colleagues' children, spouse, and household pets while conducting a business meeting. This has evolved into our new "normal" and, I think, has increased our mutual compassion for one another, knowing we are all in a similar boat. For example, when my cat recently decided to attack my webcam mid-client call randomly , I swiftly scooped him up, put him outside the office, shut the door, re-adjusted the camera, and laughed, saying, "Thanks for your patience - my furry office assistant is a bit out of sorts today." Hearty laughs were returned on the other end, with a shared story about their respective fur babies, and then the business was resumed. A year and a half ago, I would have been mortified beyond belief, and more than likely, judged on some level for a perceived lack of professionalism by the person on the other end of the Zoom call. But oh my, how times are changing. Granted, working remotely certainly adds a layer of complexity to developing and maintaining authentic human connections in our lives and our work. However, for so many roles, the necessary skills to thrive in your position are not location-dependent skills. Meaningful and authentic communication, proactively and with purpose, rather than passively or reactively, is essential. We can very easily assume a more passive, disconnected role working remotely. However, that shapes the difference between a virtual home-based assistant and a high-level, Executive Assistant and Strategic Business Partner working remotely. Ensuring quality service provision is never compromised, regardless of location, one must understand exceptional remote support brings a very distinctive skill set. Although this might be intimidating, I challenge you to view this as empowering. This transformation in the power dynamic underscores the opportunities you have in taking ownership of redefining your roles and setting the standard for your future successes in the virtual arena. Human connection, I believe, is an essential component of this, and it is up to us to foster meaningful and authentic connections, even from afar. We are blessed today with a plethora of technological options to do so. I can also assure you that your authenticity, or lack thereof, shines through on a Zoom call. Ultimately, staying true to your authentic self necessitates getting comfortable with your own vulnerability. Remind yourself to embrace your imperfections, with or without the Zoom filters! There are so many components that comprise your unique self. Some people struggle with authenticity in the virtual arena because they are striving for perfection or perceived perfection that can be portrayed online, albeit not authentically or sustainably. So, what have you got to lose? Align with your genuine self in the virtual arena because perfection is not real, and there is only one of you; everyone else is taken. Follow me on Facebook , Instagram , LinkedIn , or visit my website for more info! Hayden Orme, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Prior to launching her own business, Hayden supported various C-level executives. Most recently, she partnered with the Chairman, President, and CEO of a Fortune 5 company. Supplementing over 13 years in the Corporate world, as a licensed 50-Ton Master Merchant Mariner, Hayden has captained yacht charters and delivered private sailboats. During her tenure managing a Boston-based charter company, Hayden was named one of “The Top 10 Meeting Planners" by Women’s Business Boston and featured in Boston Business Journal’s “On the Move.” Hayden's broad professional experiences inspired her new business enterprise. Handled. By Hayden, LLC is a unique approach to customized operations support, combining elements of small business consulting, project management, and virtual assistant services. Hayden also provides 1:1 strategy consulting and coaching in small businesses and individual career optimization. Hayden bridges the gap for entrepreneurs between their current state of overwhelm and their optimal business goals (whether it be with an established business or one just in the initial conceptual states) . She collaboratively maps out the best path forward with realistic timelines and accountability and then works on the execution to support her client's actual goals. Hayden is an international speaker on best practices in virtual support. Hayden is passionate about animals, dedicating time to volunteer with various animal rescue leagues wherever she has lived. She currently sits on the Board of Directors for the non-profit Craniocervical Foundation.

Written by: Agnes Gomori, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Are you toying with the idea of becoming an entrepreneur but afraid that as an empath, it might not be a good fit for you? Here are some traits that come naturally to extroverted empaths, but maybe you haven’t considered them as useful assets when starting a business. Financial security is one of the top priorities for empaths, and certainly, there is a lot to consider before quitting the 9-5 job, which comes with a monthly paycheck. But if you have a nagging feeling inside that, you are not living purposefully. And that year after year, you are working to build someone else’s dream as opposed to building your own, I understand you. For empaths, purposeful living is in the center of their lives, yet many of them hold back on their dreams because of the fear they might be too sensitive for a dog-eat-dog world. But what if you already have the qualities that can make you become successful in your own right? Let’s look at some traits which are typical for extroverted empaths. 1. They are highly creative . Many empaths are multi-passionate with an infinite pool of creative ideas. Sometimes these ideas come in the form of a dream or during meditation. This level of creative vision comes with the need for freedom, and that is why empaths don’t enjoy doing monotonous tasks where they have to do the same things day in and out. They enjoy being stimulated intellectually and won’t stay in a place that isn’t motivational and where they can’t progress. When they are in the right headspace, they can come up with truly original ideas. They dislike anything which is fake or of poor value. They are authentic and want to offer the best possible service. Half of the fun for them is coming up with new ideas. 2. They are highly intuitive. Empaths are deeply in touch with their inner wisdom. They can spot the gap in the market or simply have that strong feeling about which candidate to hire when recruiting. Their intuition helps them in decision-making from the start; whether they want to know the right time to expand the business or start a new adventure, they will tune into their intuition. 3. They are natural-born leaders. Extroverted empaths have a natural authority around them. Whether they work as a solopreneur or with a team, empaths genuinely care about the people they work with just as they care about their clients. They are charismatic and attract people naturally. Early in their career, they might find it uncomfortable as, despite being extroverted, they don’t like the attention. But as they become more experienced, they will make a visionary and empathetic leader. 4. They love networking. Empaths who are on the extroverted side are people orientated and connect with ease with people from all walks of life. Empaths don’t like small talk but love having meaningful conversations and lots of it. With their friendly approach and genuine curiosity, they make people at ease. They feel people’s energy and intention. Therefore, know when to continue or abort a conversation politely. Their love of networking makes them good at negotiating too. 5. They are skilled listeners and observers. Empaths are good listeners and intuitively know what questions to ask or how deep a conversation should go. They know the power of active listening, and they do it with genuine interest. Their open attitude helps them observe and understand the different energies of people. Empaths prefer the traditional approach of making lasting business connections - as opposed to quick surface-level sales - and active listening is a helpful tool in achieving it. 6. They are authentic. Although they can sense if something is about to become a trend, they dislike following the crowd. This comes from them being the creators as opposed to the followers. Their authentic approach to life and not joining the mainstream comes from the need of living purposefully. Empaths are lifelong learners, which allows them to adapt to new situations. They often have a calling from a young age but don’t dare to explore it because of social expectations. They want to help others, and it’s not unlikely that a business idea arises from searching for an answer in their life situation, such as a parent becoming a life coach for fellow parents for children with ADHD. 7. They genuinely care about helping others. Because empaths are caring and people orientated, they are likely to start a business where they can interact with people face to face, but not in large volume. It is against their nature to do something purely for financial gain. They can smell it from a mile when someone is not genuine, whether it’s a vendor or a prospect. Their business has to be purposeful where they can make a difference in people’s lives, and it’s unlikely to be a franchise. 8. They are diplomatic. Empaths have a strong moral compass paired up with good mannerism. They are idealists, which makes them natural peacemakers, always aim for harmony. They are friendly and respectful, and this is what they expect in return. Empaths cannot thrive in a hostile environment. It makes them off-balanced and unproductive and they would make it their priority to smooth things out. If there is any frustration in their team or a client complains, empaths can resolve the situation with their calming presence and their first-class listening skills. Conclusion There are many reasons extroverted empaths can succeed as entrepreneurs, and hopefully, the above list helped to highlight some of these traits. If your inner voice is telling you it’s your time to live purposefully but just can’t figure out the next steps, please get in touch via my website , LinkedIn or Instagram . Follow me on Facebook , LinkedIn , Instagram and visit my website for more info! Read more from Agn es ! Agnes Gomori, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Agnes Gomori is an Intuitive Life Coach and Healer. As a multi-passionate, creative Empath, Agnes is committed to helping fellow Empaths to find their true calling by applying the healing power of arts and nature, which she combines with energy healing in her therapeutic coaching sessions. Agnes has helped clients from across the globe to unlock their true potential. Her mission is to help extroverted Empaths become the empowered creators they were born to be.

Written by: Liz Sparkes, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. It can be scary to think that if we let go, forgave, and let ourselves fully accept ourselves just as we are and lived fully present, what would happen, isn’t it? Also, we can be very attached to the person that we believe we are. The person that others have told us that we are. This is how we limit ourselves time and time again. We can hold a huge amount of resistance to overcoming blocks and integrating aspects within ourselves and entering into our true authentic selves. We can become so used to functioning with only half of our ‘power,’ or giving it all away to situations, or people and places. Believing at some level that they have more strength than we do. The idea of firing on all cylinders raises our red flags sometimes. What will happen if I engage fully with my abilities? How will my life change? What will happen to my relationships? At some level, we do fear our own ability and what it means to be fully authentically ourselves. I know because I fear it! Whilst building my business, self-worth, and self-acceptance, work has been paramount to moving forward. Each time we move through a limiting belief, forgive ourselves (and others), or allow our true nature to be seen, we welcome a little more of what is right for us. Like attracts like, if we live up to our potential and believe and trust in ourselves, we naturally gravitate towards more of what we desire. It’s the letting go of the old limiting baggage that’s important, to allow more space for what we do want. During my courses, we do a lot of exploration around self-compassion, forgiveness, and how this creates space for more of what we actually want to attract into our lives. Often this isn’t a one-session solution but something that we revisit over time. Whilst we remain frozen and bound by our fear or feelings or limiting beliefs, we can only really attract that level of newness into our lives. Here are some ways to consider when working with fear and resistance, to level up and welcome more of what you do want. Self-compassion By connecting with feelings of acceptance, connectivity, and love, we welcome supportive and nurturing feelings into the body. This provides the perfect landscape, backdrop to our experience. If we feel as though we are living from a place of fear or on high alert, we cant be open to possibilities in the same way that we are when we feel nurtured and grounded. Visualization As we begin to visualize and connect with the image of who we are beneath the sea of experience, views, and opinions, we start to move closer to ‘BE’ing that. What we focus upon, we generally strengthen. Moon work and ritual The phases of the moon are so helpful when moving through change. As you learn the energetics of the stages, you begin to understand the reasons for certain patterns, for example, why you get drawn into certain thought processes at different times. Also, you can learn how to optimize the energy in the different phases to support change within and externally. Follow me on Facebook , Instagram , Twitter , and visit my website for more info! Read more from Liz ! Liz Sparkes, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Liz Sparkes is a health psychologist, intuitive coach, and meditation and reiki practitioner. After completing a Ph.D. in Pain Psychology and training to facilitate meditation and mindfulness, Liz dedicated herself to helping others feel more empowered and fulfilled. Liz has developed academic and private transformational courses for heart-based living, meditation and compassion, awareness, and moon living. Liz works with groups and individuals in workplaces, health settings, charitable organizations, and holistic retreats. Liz utilizes a mixture of psychological and ancient spiritual methods for healing and to support living life from the perspective of the heart, gaining greater insight and intuitive trust.

Written by: Corina Dudu, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. June is approaching fast to the end marking the middle of a progressive 2021 year full of intense events which push our limits. With the Eclipse Season open in full swing in Sagittarius and Gemini, a 2nd Saturn-Uranus square on the fixed zodiac signs of Aquarius and Taurus and Mercury retrograde in Gemini for almost the entire month, June 2021 stands out as a month to remember in case you felt not challenged enough! Before it ends up its journey, June is going to be the host of the full moon in Capricorn on June 24th, 2021 . This is a beautiful full moon and one of the most positive and constructive full moons of the year with huge potential to evolve! If you are familiar with the Lunar cycles, you may have seen that the previous full moons in Capricorns have nothing to do with being positive. Despite this, this time is totally different considering that the upcoming full moon in Capricorn is Jupiter-influenced, bringing in more faith and positive impact than expected. Full Moon In Capricorn And The Cancer Summer Solstice The Summer Solstice , which just took place on June 21st, infuses this full moon in Capricorn with a strong dose of very catalyzing and manifesting energy. The Summer Solstice occurs when The Sun enters into the Cancer zodiac sign and officially starts the summer season from the astronomical perspective. This time, The Sun entered into the zodiac sign of Cancer, opening a magical realm full of challenging energies, keeping up aligned, and closing the karmic channel of both recent Eclipses we’ve just passed (Moon Eclipse in Sagittarius on May 24th and Solar Eclipse in Gemini on June 10th). The Full Moon takes place on the Family Axis Cancer — Capricorn, having the Rising Sun in Capricorn and activating the Sacrifice and Limitations Axis (Houses VI-XII ). The Sun just installed into the Cancer sign (cardinal, feminine, water sign and ruled by Moon) will be highlighted all the aspects related to home, family, traditions, roots, safety, emotions, intuition, nutrition, and desire to return to origins. The Full Moon generates a conflict between private life (family) and professional life (social) , which will create a strong impact on how we look at our life and how we act in our family. The Full Moon on the House XII (spirituality, hidden enemies, karma, subconscious, isolation and sacrifice, chronic illnesses , etc.) is going to bring out to the light all the problems related to the past, fears, traumas, unfinished works, etc.) . Once we stick more to the past, we will experience the feeling of being helpless and not getting out of the crise. House XII is considered a karmic one that comes as a test, and once the test is passed, there is a chance for a new (re)start to evolve. The Sun placed in Cancer on the House VI brings to our attention the care for our own health, the need to progress in our work and daily routine, the relationship with our peers and our pets. Also, The Sun puts the light on the need to find the right balance between personal needs and others, the need to find alternative solutions of natural healing, to look beyond the physical limits, and to evolve on the spiritual level. Also, it may be a period of closing any toxic relationships or giving up on a professional project considered too harmful at this point. This beautiful full moon gets positive aspects through the sextile to Jupiter as a reminder to keep our eyes on the big picture and never lose faith. What Really Matters is a Better Tomorrow. So, let’s keep our vibe up and create a safe space for our inner balance and, with forgiveness and compassion, to ground the new seeds into a healthy soil of our soul! I wish you all a happy full moon and happy birthday to all Cancer natives! Connect with me on Facebook and LinkedIn . Corina Dudu, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Corina Dudu is an HR Professional & Certified Life and Career Coach specialized in Talent Management and Career Development, with deep expertise in Corporate international HR processes gained over 20+ years across cultures. Corina is dedicated to delivering transformational change to people and catalyzing individuals’ potential by eliminating mental barriers to accelerate their career growth and achieve a healthy work-life balance. Corina is also a Certified Astrologist and Numerologist. She is passionate about supporting others by guiding and coaching through the various aspects of a person’s life to fulfill their unique destinies and overcome life's challenges. She believes transformation begins with each individual connected with his higher self and is essential in achieving life purpose through a conscientious and colorful life journey.

Written by: Iris L. Mendez, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. Things happen every day that tends to tick us off or rub us the wrong way. It could be something as irrelevant as getting a paper cut, waiting on hold too long when calling a customer service line, spilling your coffee, petty conflict with loved ones, or getting into a fender bender. All of these things may cause anger, sadness, annoyance, and/or irritability in our lives. What does our ability to regulate our emotions and control our impulses say about how we handle conflict when things don’t go our way? How do we practice validation of feelings while refraining from reacting to the actual emotion? How do we stay calm and grounded? Read more below: As a former social worker and psychotherapist turned Breath, Body, and Energy coach, I help clients understand how to get back into their vessels and release harbored emotions in the 4 bodies: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Through intuitive spiritual guidance, mindful movement, breathwork, energy healing, and SOULution-focused coaching: I assist clients in mindfully releasing things that we tend to take too personally. When we beat ourselves up, it creates negative self-talk, which can lead to limiting beliefs causing us to feel perceived defeat. As the saying goes, “you are your own worst critic ,” as such, it’s important to understand that beating ourselves up, especially in situations that were beyond our control, is never the answer. Getting in the imaginary boxing ring with ourselves is a form of self-abuse that can also lead to self-sabotage. When we are angry or irritated, it is more so with ourselves and our circumstances than with others. In the psychotherapy world, we also acknowledge how parts of our brain like the amygdala, which elicits our innate “fight, flight, and freeze” response in our brain, take over in these moments as a source of protection. When we blame others, in psychology, we call this projecting. As I tell my clients, blame, shame, guilt, judgment, whether of others or for ourselves, never serves us. When I work with clients, I invite them to ground down in their vessel and notice the psychological responses that come up in the physical body to release it through yoga, reiki, and self-inquiry. When we fail to do this, this usually leads to an energetic build-up in the spiritual body (or chakra systems), manifesting as physical and emotional ailments. So how do we practice emotional regulation, impulse control, and managing mindful anger? Here are 9 tips below! Step 1: Pause and Breathe! Pause! Stop in your tracks and breathe! Be aware, acknowledge, and assess the situation. Practice non-judgmental openness, mindfulness, and consciousness of what just occurred. Take 3-5 deep breaths. Inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth, noticing the rise and fall of your belly and chest with each inhale and exhale. Be aware of your thoughts and invite yourself to intercept any negative thinking or negative self-talk. Focus on the present moment (not past or future) so you can make sound decisions on your next steps- logically rather than emotionally. Deep breathing increases the oxygen flow to the brain, which in moments of perceived danger, tragedy, or perceived obstacles can allow us to make quick and sound decisions. For more on mindfulness practice, meditation, and deep breathing exercises, be sure to contact me. For now, try this practice below: 4-box breath technique: Inhale for 4 counts or seconds (filling up the diaphragm) Hold your breath safely for 4 seconds Exhale for 4 counts (deflating from the gut) Pause for 4 counts or 4 seconds (Scan your 5 senses and notice what you see, taste, smell, hear, and feel) Repeat 4 times. Step 3: Stop Finger Pointing Quit blaming yourself or others. Face it, things happen! Was there a cause or effect to the situation that’s causing anger or anguish -of course? But it is now in the past which we cannot change or undo. So, there is no reason to begin a marathon of ruminating thoughts, self-blaming, hypotheticals, and/or what-ifs. Blaming yourself will not make things any better, nor will it change a situation. We often want to hold someone accountable, even if it’s at the cost of our sanity, by taking the blame for something that was completely out of our control /or not our fault. Sure, sometimes, there is something or someone to blame, and we must hold ourselves accountable to times we intentionally and unintentionally mess up. But sometimes, that doesn’t mean the action we need to be remorseful about was intentional. Practice this mantra in moments of blame or guilt by placing one hand over your heart and one hand over your belly and repeat three times: “I know my heart, and I know my intentions.” You can take accountability and responsibility morally. However, if it truly wasn’t your fault and you had NO control over the circumstances, quit making it your fault! Stop the judgment and quit trying to hold someone accountable-especially if the finger-pointing is being done in the mirror. Step 4: Reframe & Regain Resiliency Reframe your negative self-talk into positive self-talk and positive thinking. Cognitive Reframing is a process in which you reframe negative thoughts and feelings into more positive ones and elicits positive responses, reactions, and behaviors. Think of it as a lens you change or modify inside your mind to turn the bad into good. See the good or positive out of difficult situations. This is where true control and resiliency are regained. You can practice this by intercepting negative thoughts and redefining them in your brain by saying the opposite. Switch the internal light switch from negative to positive. If you practice positive affirmations daily, this can also improve this habit. Step 5: Quit Quoting Sometimes it is not our voice or negative self-talk that influences us. Some of our deep-rooted anger towards the self has been learned or comes from past trauma, including verbal and physical abuse- especially during our upbringing. Someone may have told you something negative about you or believed something negative about you that you have now internalized. During times where things happen that are out of our control, we tend to replay those quotes in our minds like a tape recorder or a broken record. This is a form of negative self-talk by attempting to confirm and validate that narrative and bias beliefs about ourselves. We can’t continuously repeat the negative quotes that we have heard from others, especially toxic people/or loved ones. Quit the quoting and understand that you are human. Repeat after me, “ Even though ______ Is not ok, right now, it will eventually be ok, and I lovingly and wholeheartedly accept myself.” Step 6: Quit Catastrophic Thinking Sometimes we get stuck in “worry loops,” catastrophic thinking, or other cognitive distortions or unhelpful thinking patterns. Negative situations can sometimes cause an increase in anxiety which can cause us to make irrational inferences from one situation to another. I have always been an “expect the worse, hope for the best” type of person. But thinking the worst is not always healthy. Ruminating about difficult situations, magnifying the worst-case scenarios, jumping to conclusions can increase negative thoughts. There’s a negative domino effect that occurs. In turn, we run around in our brains in circles, pondering ALL of the worst-case scenarios and outcomes, which can be energetically and emotionally draining. Reverse the downward spiraling and instead think of some positives that can or have occurred as a result of the one negative situation. Sometimes it’s hard to find a positive but focusing on the positive is better than having the negative manifest and take over your life. Ground down and use your wise mind (not emotional mind) to deal with situations we cannot change. Step 7: Exert Energy In difficult situations, as stated above, our fight, flight, freeze response kicks in, and sometimes your response is to want to KICK something or someone. There is no positive result of potentially harming yourself, others, or even objects, nor will it fix or solve a situation. You may want to punch a wall. You may want to scream, yell, or fight. It is in these moments where being present is essential and beneficial. Be mindful of your physiological responses. I.e., heavy and fast breathing, leg shaking, clenched fists, jaw clenching, pacing, rapid heartbeat, etc. This is all normal! Be present and aware of this response-connect to your body. Acknowledge, validate, but don’t react. Find healthy ways to exert negative energy positively. When you exert energy -endorphins in your body are produced, secreted, and/or released, which can cause positive or happy feelings in the body. Here are some healthy physical ways to exert and release energy positively: Exercise and physical activity Laugh Boxing Yoga Running /jogs Brisk Walks Push-ups Weight Lifting Dancing Sex or Masturbation Crying Step 9: Let it go Let it GO! Let go of things you cannot control. It’s important to recognize some things we just cannot control. However, we can control our feelings and our reactions to those feelings. You can’t allow small bumps in the road to affect your entire day, week, and life. While it is important to acknowledge your feelings, and even more important, to validate them- what you do with them matters most. We tend to believe the scenarios we create in our heads and then react to that perceived created belief or scenario as if it’s a fact or true. Fact-check and reality test yourself. Remember to be present. Be mindful. Accept what is, and move on. If you need support in managing your 4 bodies, be sure to contact me and schedule a complimentary 1:1 SOULution-Focused Strategy Session HERE . Visit my website HERE . Follow me on Instagram and @ilm_healing , and if you need more mindfulness be sure to check out my Youtube Channel HERE with free yoga + mindfulness as well as my podcast The IM Healing Podcast for more brief mindful moments now streaming on your favorite podcast applications, including Apple, Spotify, and more. Namaste! Iris L. Mendez, LSW, RYT, Reiki II Iris L. Mendez, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Iris L. Mendez, LSW, RYT, Reiki II; is a Breath, Body, + Energy coach and founder of ILM Healing Soulutions, LLC. where she aligns with her clients to co-facilitate healing in the 4 bodies (mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual) through alternative healing practices. She helps clients break through limiting beliefs, root down, and rise through yoga, reiki energy healing, SOULution-focused coaching, and intuitive and spiritual guidance. She has a Bachelor’s in Psychology and a Master’s in Social Work. In her spare time, Iris enjoys writing, hiking, dancing, exploring, and spending time with friends and family.

Written by: Serena Fordham, Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise. I have been thinking about this topic for some time – years, in fact. You see, since I started my first business in 2013, social media has been a massive game-changer, and as I see so many ‘influencers’ and ‘experts’ increase their followers by thousands, this has left me wondering “what’s more important – the numbers or the people?” Rewind to times in history before the internet was the ‘be-all-and -end-all’ of marketing for business. The way businesses thrived was they made sure they got in front of their target market in the locations where they serviced and then sold the shit out of what they were offering (yes, there is such thing as being in the right place at the right time!) However, nowadays, I come across business women (and men) all the time who are so confused with how to market and promote their products or services because they are being fed so many conflicting views online. Social media and the internet are both blessings, as with a touch of a button, we can get ourselves in front of our ideal clients. However, sometimes these are disguised as blessings, but in fact, we are suckers of our time and energy, throwing confusion at us every time we log on. With the ease of the output on social media, so many small business owners make this platform their number one choice for selling; however, with so much competition, most posting, commenting, and interaction falls on death ears, as our customers are busier and more knowledgeable than ever before. If I had a pound for every time I have heard ‘social media’ as the answer to the question ‘where do you market your business?’ then I would definitely be a millionaire! Have we all forgotten that there are so many more ways to promote your business offline, which might be more valuable to our specific business? Yes, social media is free. However, with many platforms changing the rules (a.k.a. their algorithms) all the time, the fate of your business is surely in the hands of Mr. Zuckerberg and his crew, rather than you as the owner. Plus, each time the rules change, as business owners, we have to find answers to how to get ahead again, which takes up our valuable time and energy, meaning we are always playing catch up and never really making any marketing progress. So, now my frustrations with social media are laid bare, I want to move on and out of this crap about the popularity contest of life. With the rise of so-called influencers, everyone is calling themselves an ‘expert,’ ‘qualified,’ ‘experienced,’ la-de-dah – but behind these labels, there sometimes seems little depth or evidence to back up claims – and this totally frustrates me. You see, for me, I call myself a Business Strategist, Growth/Development, and Empowerment Mentor to Female Entrepreneurs because that is what I am! But I always get asked why I don’t call myself a coach – and the reason is that I don’t hold a coaching qualification. I have a Business Management degree, ten years’ experience in advising, working with, and developing different businesses in various industries, plus multiple awards to back up my knowledge and skills. So, because I am an honest person and totally transparent with my audience and clients, you can see why it totally pisses me off when I see someone post that they are new to their business with no qualifications or experience for one month. The next month they are an ‘expert’ (because they have had one or two clients!) And what is all this fakeness about? It’s because social media has made us feel that we need to be popular and the best at what we do to be accepted/to fit in/ to complete with others – and it is a load of rubbish! The absolute truth is that it is all about popularity and how we are viewed by others, rather than actually delivering value and giving two F’s about each person that we speak to and support with our businesses. That’s why I wanted to mix things up and be the revolutionary, forward-thinking, independent woman that I am (as I’m a round peg that doesn’t seem to fit in any of the square holes out there!) by creating HER Business Revolution. Not a big shocker - I actually do give a crap about the women I speak to, and whether they choose to buy from me or not, they are all special, and I really do care about their futures, dreams, and ambitions. Of course, I want to support them (and to do that, I need money to eat too!), but if they don’t want my paid offerings, I’m not about to just cast them aside like they are nothing to me. Life as a female entrepreneur is hard, and we all need to support each other as much as possible, without the judgment of popularity being the measure of worthiness. Especially as social media makes us feel inferior, the number of followers being the number one judgment on us and our success as businesswomen. The pressure upon us to be liked and popular on social media also means that we will never actually be able to reach our own personal ‘success goals’ if we are constantly striving to increase our number of followers, likes, and engagement figures, rather than focusing on our true passions and where best to promote these to our potential buyers. For years I have worried about what people have thought about me on social media. With the recent changes on Facebook, meaning my group numbers decreased significantly overnight, it felt like the right time to out these concerns and rationalize my recent insights into how the online world of social media actually operates. I want to make it clear that I am not a hater of social media at all. In fact, it allows me to connect with some incredible people from across the globe. However, it all boils down to the fact that if we focus all our efforts on being popular online – with the numbers being our number one measure – then we are not concerned at all about building genuine relationships with the people behind the computer screen. By acting in this way and putting all our eggs into the basket of social media stardom, surely, we are missing the actual valuable opportunities to make ourselves and our businesses successful? (These being to reach out to them offline and by really getting to know the people who are interested in what we have to offer the world!) I hope this has given you some food for thought. Feel free to visit my website & follow me on Facebook for more tips like this! Read more from Serena! Serena Fordham, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Serena is an expert Business Strategist, Growth/Development and Empowerment Mentor to Female Entrepreneurs, and a best-selling Author, Speaker, Entrepreneur, and successful multiple Business Owner. Her main passion is offering business strategies, support, and empowerment to ambitious and high vibe business women both locally and internationally – through HER Business Revolution. She is also known for her organizational skills by owning Glow Virtual Assistants and supporting women and child-related charities (also founding two charitable initiatives – Mums Empowerment Movement and SociaBubble).

Written by: Raeesa Mahomed , Executive Contributor Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise . When I was 21 years old and didn’t really know much about anything, I changed my life through the power of self-belief, and I didn’t even know what I was doing. Here is what happened: Once upon a time... I need to give you a little bit of background first. I was always interested in acting and performing. I took Speech and Drama as my majors for my BA degree, which is unusual. I am a South African of Indian origin, and Indian parents around the world generally only want their children to be doctors or lawyers (bless them). Still, I only wanted to do something in performance and entertainment, and my supportive parents let me do it (they probably just wanted some peace). Then I saw an advertisement that the national cable television channel was looking for an anchor for their ‘Indian bouquet.’ This was apartheid, South Africa. There were no Indians on television, which white presenters dominated. It was a totally new field, but something instinctively told me that this was what I was meant to do, that I would be perfect for this position. Thanks, but no thanks. I applied with an audition tape (yeah, it was a long time ago) and got a polite rejection letter within a week. No reason. I guessed it was probably because they wanted the anchor to be Johannesburg, and I lived in Durban, an hour’s flight away. I was so convinced, though, that I was the right person for this job that I could not leave it at that. I called the offices of the channel and asked to speak to the Executive Producer. I finally got to speak to him a few days later after nagging a few people. He was curt. I told him he sent me a rejection letter because he hadn’t listened to my tape. There was silence. “ What do you mean? ” he said. I replied, “ With respect, Mr. X, if you had listened to my audition, you wouldn’t have sent me a rejection letter.” More silence. “Okay,” he said. “ I’ll get back to you. ” (Yeah, right). But wait… He actually got back to me after listening to my audition! The next day a local newspaper called me and did a front-page article (with huge color pic) as a contender for the job. A week later, I flew up to Johannesburg to do a live audition at the TV channel’s offices. The same EP personally told me that my audition was excellent, but unfortunately, they had to get someone based in Jo’burg as they did not want the expense of flying the presenter in to do links every week. I understood - as long as I had been given a chance to audition. Miracles do happen. A few weeks later, after the media had built up to a crescendo in this historical search for the first Indian presenter on TV, the EP called me personally to tell me I had got the job. So let’s just understand this: I got the job out of 700 auditions when they didn’t want someone based in my city (because of the added expense) after originally getting a rejection letter. The media went wild. I was on the front, the middle, and back page of every major (and minor) newspaper in the country and quite a few magazines. Moral of the Story I so strongly believed in my abilities that I refused to take a ‘no’ from a major cable TV network. I didn’t think about what I was doing – I just did it because I felt so strongly - in my gut and every fiber of my being. I didn’t let the fact that it was a totally new and unknown field deter me. And that belief is what got me that job that 700 people had auditioned for and which launched my broadcasting career that lasted decades in TV, radio, and film. Not all plain sailing. I have had lots of very low moments since then. I fell many times and learned some hard and difficult lessons. I’ve had to pick myself up and dust myself down and start again. And I had excruciating self-doubt and felt hopeless. But I remembered that original self-belief clung to it (and my faith in God) and forged on to new highs. Why am I telling you this? Not to blow my own trumpet (really) or tell you about how fantastic I am. It’s to tell you that every one of you can do exactly the same if you allowed yourself to truly believe in your abilities and ignore everything or the person who tried to persuade you otherwise. Everyone has a talent and ability that is special and unique. You just need to believe in it, nurture it and act on it. And keep doing it, over and over. Never give up, never give in. The power of belief. There is a reason why beliefs are so powerful and can make anything happen. But that is another article on its own, which I will talk about next time. Until then, make it happen. Want to learn more from Raeesa? Follow her Facebook, Instagram, Linkedin, and visit her website. You can also email her at info@raeesamahomed.co.za . Raeesa Mahomed, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Raeesa Mahomed is a transformational life coach and her tagline 'Be the best you' aptly describes the results she gets with her clients. Raeesa has helped hundreds of clients remove negative programming from the subconscious mind and take them to a place of positivity and empowerment and in so doing create the life they want. She comes from a decades-long award-winning international career in radio, TV, and film, and her path to deep self-reflection and life coaching began when she faced a life-threatening illness a few years ago. She now also helps others heal from disease by addressing their emotional health and spirituality. She is also a writer and motivational speaker.