Why “Fixing Yourself” Isn’t Wellness and What to Do Instead
- Brainz Magazine
- May 20
- 7 min read
Updated: Nov 24
Genta Spaho-Vazquez is a visionary in Freedom-Based Wellness, spearheading Genta Wellness + The Glow Wellness Club. Her global movement is reshaping the wellness landscape by empowering high-achieving women to break free from burnout. Through her innovative approach, she guides them to design a lifestyle that thrives on clarity, energy, and ease – making wellness not just a goal, but a way of life.
You know that feeling when you're doing everything right, the lemon water, the morning walk, the hormone-balancing supplements that cost more than your last electric bill, and yet, you still feel off? Picture this: a woman holding a mug, standing in an office surrounded by computers, sticky notes, and charts on the wall. She looks thoughtful, bathed in warm lighting.
Still bloated. Still wired but tired. Still waking up feeling like you've run a marathon in your sleep.
It's frustrating. But more than that, it's defeating.
Because you're smart. You're capable. You're trying.
So why does it feel like no matter how many habits you stack, wellness is always just out of reach?
If you've ever found yourself thinking, "Maybe I just need more discipline," "Maybe I'm not trying hard enough," or "Maybe something's wrong with me," let me stop you right there. There is nothing wrong with you. But there is something very wrong with the version of wellness we've been sold.
This article is not about doing more. It's about doing less, but better. It's about stepping off the hamster wheel of hyper-vigilant health tracking and stepping into something softer. More sustainable. More you.
What is the “fixing yourself” cycle?
Here's the thing no one tells you when you start chasing wellness:
If you approach it from the belief that you're broken, nothing you do will ever feel like enough.
The fixing yourself cycle is sneaky like that. It often starts with something innocent, a desire to feel better, to take control, to glow a little more.
But before long, you're neck-deep in protocols, half-finished programs, blood sugar graphs, and a supplement drawer that rivals Sephora's skincare wall. You've got a morning routine that's longer than your attention span, and still, you're exhausted.
Because underneath all that is the belief that if you could just get it "right," you'd finally feel okay.
This cycle shows up as:
Constantly tweaking your habits instead of trusting your body
Jumping from one solution to the next, hoping this one will be the one
Feeling guilty for resting, for eating, for not doing more
It's not laziness. It's not a lack of discipline. It's survival. Your body is trying to keep up with a system that's been built to keep you chasing.
Where did this come from? (And why it’s so sneaky)
Let's call it what it is: this obsession with fixing ourselves didn't come out of nowhere. It's been drip-fed to us for years.
It started in childhood for a lot of us.
When being good meant being quiet, polite, obedient. When perfection was praised, and anything less was, well, not. When rest was laziness. When listening to your body meant you were being dramatic.
Then we grew up, and that conditioning shape-shifted into hustle culture, diet culture, and a wellness industry that profits off your exhaustion.
It's no coincidence that high-achieving women are the ones most stuck in the fixing loop.
We were taught to perform. To prove. To be perfect.
So when we don't feel well, when our bodies are bloated or burned out or breaking down, we don't ask what we need. We ask what we did wrong.
And here's why it's so sneaky:
It looks like wellness. It feels like taking control. It sounds like self-care.
But in reality? It's just another flavor of self-criticism, dressed up in green juice and cute matching sets.
And the more we chase healing as something to earn or unlock, the more disconnected we become from the very thing we're trying to restore: trust in our own body.
What wellness should feel like
Here's the radical thing no one tells you: wellness isn't supposed to feel like another job.
It's supposed to feel like you're coming home to yourself.
It's not rigid. It's not performative. And it's definitely not another spreadsheet full of things you should be doing before 7 a.m.
True wellness is quiet. Grounded. It meets you where you are, not where your perfectionist brain thinks you should be by now.
It's the version of health that doesn't demand extremes, just consistency.
Not discipline, just self-respect. Not shame, just softness.
Here's what it actually looks like:
Moving your body because it feels good, not because you're trying to earn your next meal
Eating in a way that supports your energy, not spikes your anxiety
Knowing when to push, and when to pause
Tuning in, not checking out
Building habits that nourish you on your worst day, not just your best
And maybe most importantly? It's trusting that your body doesn't need to be micromanaged to be healthy. It just needs to feel safe. Supported. Heard.
The problem is, that kind of wellness isn't sexy. It doesn't sell out bootcamps or sell you $88 tinctures promising to detox your life.
But it does work. And it lasts.
What’s the alternative? (Do this instead)
If you're nodding along right now thinking, "Okay... love this for me... but what do I actually do instead?"
Let's talk about that. Because the answer isn't another protocol. It's a paradigm shift.
You don't need to do more. You need to do what actually works with your body, not against it.
Here's what that looks like in real life:
1. Shift from control to curiosity
Instead of obsessing over getting it right, start asking better questions.
What's my body asking for today?
Where am I pushing when I could be pausing?
What does enough look like right now?
Curiosity quiets shame. It opens the door to deeper self-awareness, without the pressure to fix anything.
2. Focus on capacity, not discipline
Discipline is overrated. If your nervous system is fried and your body is inflamed, no amount of discipline will carry you through. Start with your capacity. Build habits that support you on your lowest-energy days. That's how you create consistency.
Think:
10-minute morning walks
Breakfast that balances your blood sugar (protein + fat + fiber)
Screens off 30 minutes before bed
Not glamorous, but transformational when done consistently.
3. Build from safety, not shame
Most of us have been trying to heal our bodies while actively stressing them out. Instead of restriction and punishment, ask:
How can I make my body feel safe today?
What would regulate my nervous system instead of hijacking it?
Spoiler: this might look like less cardio, more slow strength. Fewer supplements, more sleep. Fewer food rules, more nourishment.
4. Start with simplicity
Before you reach for the adaptogens and $70 hydration powder, go back to basics.
Are you sleeping 7-8 hours a night?
Are you eating real meals at regular times?
Are you drinking water that isn't coffee or flavored with a side of guilt?
Are you getting outside, sunlight on your face, feet on the ground, even just for a few minutes?
Are you breathing, like, actually taking a full inhale at any point in your day?
These are the unsexy, unmarketable basics that actually move the needle.
Simple doesn't mean easy. But it does mean sustainable.
If it's not doable on your busiest day, it's not sustainable.
Start small. Start soft. Start with the version of wellness that meets you where you are, not where you think you should be by now.
5. Stop “fixing.” Start listening
This one might feel the hardest, and the most important. Because when you've spent years outsourcing your body's wisdom to experts, protocols, and plans, it can feel almost unnatural to trust yourself.
But your body isn't the problem. It's the guide.
It's been speaking to you all along, through your fatigue, your cravings, your cycle, your moods. Not to sabotage you, but to communicate.
What if, instead of silencing those signals, you got curious about them?
What if bloating isn't something to fix, it's your body saying, "Hey, something's not sitting right."
What if burnout isn't failure, it's feedback?
What if healing isn't a checklist, it's a relationship?
Because real wellness starts with listening.
And listening isn't passive. It's powerful.
Start your journey today
Here's what I want you to remember, if nothing else lands today:
You don't need to be more disciplined. You don't need a total overhaul. You don't need to fix anything.
You need support, not pressure. Simplicity, not stress. Safety, not shame.
You are not broken. Your body isn't the enemy.
And wellness isn't something to earn, it's your birthright.
If this resonated with you, know this: you're not alone, and you don't have to navigate this on your own.
That's exactly why I created The Glow Wellness Club, a membership space for high-achieving women who are done with the all-or-nothing mindset and ready for something softer, smarter, and more sustainable.
Inside the club, we focus on real routines that work in real life. We unlearn the toxic "fix yourself" noise and replace it with support, structure, and science-backed strategies that feel good, not overwhelming.
If you're ready to stop chasing the perfect wellness plan and start building one that actually fits your life, I'd love to have you join us.
Come see what effortless wellness actually looks like.
Join The Glow Wellness Club here.
Read more from Genta Spaho-Vazquez
Genta Spaho-Vazquez, Founder of Genta Wellness + The Glow Wellness Club
Genta Spaho-Vazquez is a visionary in Freedom-Based Wellness, dedicated to empowering high-achieving women to break free from burnout and design a life of clarity, energy, and ease. As the founder of Genta Wellness + The Glow Wellness Club, she leads a global movement that redefines wellness, blending cutting-edge practices with a deep understanding of modern challenges. Genta's work offers a sanctuary for women to reclaim their energy and purpose, proving that it's possible to have a thriving career, vibrant personal life, and profound well-being. Connect with her to explore how wellness can be a sustainable way of life.
