Five Tips on How to Overcome Your Inner Judge and Speak With Confidence
- Feb 12, 2025
- 3 min read
Updated: Jun 25, 2025
Lisa works as an executive public speaking coach, actor, and fitness enthusiast. She is passionate about helping people overcome imposter syndrome and find their authentic voice to unlock career success in business and beyond. She is the founder of Speak Proud.
Have you ever stood up to speak and suddenly heard that little voice whispering, "They’re judging you"? It’s like an unwelcome guest in your mind, making you second-guess yourself right when you need confidence the most.
That voice? I call it The Judge. It’s sneaky, persistent, and often the biggest thing holding you back. But here’s the twist: The Judge isn’t your enemy; it’s just misunderstood.
1. Recognize the judge for what it is
The Judge is like an overprotective friend; it means well but often gets it wrong. In ancient times, when survival depended on group acceptance, the judge evolved to keep us safe and prevent us from being ostracised. But today, it mistakes public speaking for a life-or-death situation. So next time The Judge pipes up, pause. Take a breath. Instead of buying into its fears, recognise it as outdated programming that no longer serves you.
2. Flip the script
The Judge loves to throw harsh critiques at you:
"You don’t know enough."
"They’ll see right through you."
"You’re not a real expert."
But here’s the thing: Most of these thoughts are baseless. Challenge them. Ask yourself, "Where’s the proof?" You’ll often realise that the Judge is just running an old, worn-out tape that doesn’t reflect reality. Instead of fearing judgment, shift your mindset. Ask, "How can I help my audience?" Focusing on serving others silences self-doubt and makes your message more powerful.
3. Take action anyway
Confidence isn’t about never hearing The Judge; it’s about moving forward despite it. The more you speak, the more you prove to yourself that nothing catastrophic will happen. A skeptical look from someone? Just a moment in time.A pause in your speech? Normal. Not everyone will agree with you, and that’s okay. Your goal isn’t universal approval; it’s connecting with the people who need to hear what you have to say.
4. Make peace with the judge
The Judge isn’t going anywhere, but you can change how you interact with it. Instead of letting it control you, use it as a tool and let it remind you to prepare, to be intentional, but not to hold back. When you hear your internal judge, speak to it kindly and say.
“I get it, judge. You want to protect me, but this is not a life or death-situation.”
If you’re ready to quiet The Judge and speak with confidence, I’d love to help. Because your voice matters and the world deserves to hear it.
5. Shift from self to service
The judge thrives when you are focused on yourself in your head. When you feel this happening, shift your focus to the audience. Ask, How can I help them at this moment? Working as an actor, my best work happens when I focus my attention on my fellow actors and not on myself. The same applies to public speaking.
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Read more from Lisa Sheerin
Lisa Sheerin, Executive Public Speaking Coach
Lisa works as an executive public speaking coach, actor, and group fitness instructor with over 20 years of experience. A graduate of a three-year drama school program in London, she began her career in theatre and film, where she faced and overcame imposter syndrome. Today, she empowers others to embrace their authenticity and transform self-doubt into confidence, combining her acting expertise, fitness training, and passion for personal growth. Her mission is to guide others toward a life where they can speak and live proudly.
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