Beyond Survival and Healing From Trauma After FGM
Updated: Feb 22
Written by Howaida Abdalla, Life Coach
Howaida Abdalla is a survivor of Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) and a life coach who has experience when it comes to trauma that a survivor goes through and the journey it takes to heal. She helps women to reconnect and love themselves again. She is a founder of "The Growth Hub Coaching and "Women Empowerment edition: Impact for change" Podcast.
Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) is often discussed in terms of human rights and legality, but far less attention is given to what happens after. For survivors, FGM is not a past event, it can be a lifelong experience carried in the body, mind, and sense of identity.
Healing after FGM is possible. But it requires understanding trauma, breaking silence, and creating spaces where survivors are supported with dignity and care.
Trauma beyond the physical
While FGM causes physical harm, its psychological impact is often deeper and longer-lasting. Survivors may experience anxiety, depression, flashbacks, difficulty with intimacy, or a profound sense of shame. Many were subjected to FGM as children, before they had the language to understand what was happening to them.
Trauma can remain dormant for years and resurface during moments such as puberty, marriage, pregnancy, or medical care. These reactions are not signs of weakness, they are normal responses to harm.
The weight of silence
For many survivors, silence is one of the most painful legacies of FGM. Cultural expectations often discourage speaking about the body, pain, or sexuality. This silence can isolate survivors and delay healing.
Breaking the silence does not mean sharing one’s story publicly. Healing can begin quietly by acknowledging the experience privately, speaking to a trusted person, or seeking professional support. Survivors are never obligated to tell their story, but they deserve to be heard when they choose to speak.
Healing the mind and emotions
Trauma-informed mental health support can play a crucial role in recovery. Therapists trained in trauma or gender-based violence help survivors process their experiences safely, develop coping strategies, and release self-blame.
Support groups, whether in person or online, also offer powerful healing. Hearing others say “me too” can replace isolation with connection and hope.
Reconnecting with the body
FGM often disrupts a survivor’s relationship with their body, leading to feelings of disconnection or mistrust. Healing may involve gently rebuilding that connection through mindfulness, breathing exercises, gentle movement, or body-based therapies.
This process must always happen at the survivor’s pace. There is no correct timeline for healing, and no expectation to “move on.”
Intimacy, relationships, and trust
FGM can affect intimacy in complex ways, influencing desire, comfort, and emotional closeness. Survivors may struggle with fear, pain, or difficulty communicating needs.
Healing in this area may include therapy, compassionate medical care, and open communication with a trusted partner. Survivors are not broken. Pleasure, safety, and consent are rights, and healing in relationships is possible.
Culture, identity, and redefinition
Many survivors hold complicated feelings toward their culture. Love, pride, grief, and anger can coexist. Healing does not require rejecting cultural identity. Instead, it can mean separating harmful practices from culture and redefining traditions in ways that protect future generations.
Survivors can honour where they come from while still demanding change.
Hope beyond trauma
Healing after FGM is not about erasing the past, it is about reclaiming the future. Survivors around the world are building fulfilling lives, supporting others, advocating for change, and raising children free from harm. FGM does not define a survivor’s worth or limit their capacity for joy, connection, or power.
A world beyond FGM
Creating a world beyond FGM requires more than laws, it requires listening to survivors, providing trauma-informed care, and replacing silence with compassion. Healing is possible. Change is possible. And survivors deserve not only to survive, but to live fully.
Read more from Howaida Abdalla
Howaida Abdalla, Life Coach
Howaida Abdalla is a life coach who helps women (survivors) of Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) to reconnect & love themselves again. She was seven years old when the FGM procedure was done on her, which left her lost and disconnected not only from people, but also from herself.
She has since dedicated her life to help other survivors to reconnect and love themselves. She is a founder of "The Growth Hub Coaching," where she helps & coaches survivors. Her Mission: To hep, To inspire & To empower.
