Resilience for the Resistance

Written by Gareth Edward Jones, Visionary Technology Leader, Environmentalist, And Social Impact Advocate

Gareth Edward Jones is a visionary technology leader with 20+ year of digital success, CIO Times Top 5 Business Leader, Executive Contributor for Brainz Magazine, UN SDG Advocate and Co-Founder of Lightrise, and Trustee of the Lightrise Foundation

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Resilience takes many forms. From a business perspective, we must have cybersecurity and risk management to be resilient. From our survival perspective, we must have food, fire/heat, water, and shelter.

But how do you become resilient on a personal level in today’s modern world, where information and influence reign supreme?

Firstly, stop beating yourself up. Life is hard enough without listening to that inner voice that keeps telling you you're not good enough. You are good enough! Ask yourself this: Why is your brain telling you that? It should be on your side, right? Maybe it isn't your mind, but the conditioning of culture and society that your chattering brain is picking up on and relaying back to you.

Secondly, this is not an article for managers who say, “You need to be more resilient” to an overstretched workforce because they lack any sense of humanity. People can be resilient, but only for short periods, at the expense of their health.

Resilience is a sort of trait. There is a reason the special forces apply stress to recruits during training: they want to see how resilient you are. It's not something that money can buy.

Resilience techniques

Circles of influence

You need to be selective about the space in your mind and what occupies it. This is tricky when the media bombards us 24/7 with a stream of negativity, triviality, and hate. Psychologist Kurt Lewin, in the 1940s, developed a helpful framework that has served me well over the years, called the Circle of Influence framework. Lewin used it to describe the various social forces that shape an individual’s behavior and attitudes.

Essentially, the model consists of three nested circles. The deepest is the Circle of Control. This represents us as humans and what we can directly control through our thoughts, words, or actions, the day-to-day of our lives, if you will.

The next is the Circle of Influence. This represents the concerns we can address. We do not have control over the outcome, but we can influence it by controlling what we can.

I remember being sat down with a mentor and manager one day, when he asked, "What's the difference between power and influence?" Thought-provoking indeed (thanks, Keith). Don't be deceived into thinking you are powerless, as influence can often be much more impactful than power. Cartoons, single acts of protest, a single post, or a moment in time, we can all look back on the history books and pinpoint how those with influence, rather than power, ultimately gained more power through their influence, significantly altering our collective history.

The last circle, on the periphery, is the Circle of Concern. This represents a wide range of concerns that often manifest themselves as things we worry about, but realistically, we have no control over the outcome. If we continue to worry, we will ultimately trigger our nervous system into a fight-or-flight response. It's evolved to do that to keep us safe. But through our long history as a species, we've probably never been bombarded with so many things to worry about. Yet somehow, worry has been monetized. You need to look like this, look at this negative news, worry about your health, worry so that we can control you. Don’t worry, be happy. There's something in those words from Bob Marley. Joy is a key part of remaining resilient.

Why worry?

In most cases, worry tends not to serve anyone, other than to the detriment of your health. Throughout my journey, I've found it essential to distinguish between worry and concern. You can be concerned about people, the planet, and your experience, but not worried. It's a subtle difference, but through worry, we can choose how much emotional energy to apply to a situation. It's worth noting that most things we worry about are okay in the end. The circles of influence are good checkpoints to frame your worry and concern, putting a sense of realism around what you can realistically do as a human being with 1,440 minutes in your day.

Worry does put you under pressure, and whether you manifest worry or concern, some of those paths will create pressure if you let them. In those situations, I like to remember that even under pressure, some wonderful things form. Diamonds take millions of years of pressure, but eventually, they shine. Most things we worry about are not life and death, and it's worth balancing these concerns with critical reasoning to determine the realistic outcomes. If you don't know what they are, considering your newly transmuted worry could help. Ask yourself what concerns you. Debt? Find out from your creditors or amazing people, debt charities. Health? Seek medical opinions. At this point in our evolution, someone has likely experienced most things, and the answers are readily available. Seek, and you shall find, but remember this: as the book The Secret describes, your thoughts control your feelings. I’ve often said reality is a bubble of perception, and this is true. Think fear, and you will create fear; think happiness, and you will create happiness.

Risk review

On my way to Everest, there was a footbridge. It was terrifying not only because of its height but also because planks were missing. As if it weren't a challenge enough, I would need to conjure the inner Indiana Jones to stretch over the gaps while my mind reminded me of what would happen. During this journey, I broke the bridge into sections of risk. For me, that was helpful, and framing your concern through a risk framework may also be something you find useful.

I broke that bridge into chunks. At this point, the worst that can happen is a graze, then a broken leg. The highest-risk areas were only a few seconds long, and they were over before I knew it. The reality was that even in those moments of high risk, the statistics and evidence showed me that people repeatedly went through the high-risk areas without the risk manifesting itself. If anything, I was worrying for nothing, and it made no logical sense when I critically broke down the challenge in front of me.

There were moments, however, during my adventures when I felt overwhelmed for no apparent reason. Two instances I recall from an arctic survival course: one night, I was in an ice shelter and suddenly felt a sense of claustrophobia, and another morning when I couldn't get warm. Wim Hof has developed a method to overcome such fear situations, but I wasn't aware of it at the time. I naturally started taking deep breaths; it felt good. It felt like I was moving in the right direction, so I continued, and both moments passed. I did eat a load of sweets too, which probably gave me a quick dopamine hit to ward off the cortisol. Later on, through reading about anxiety and Wim Hof's methods, I learned that breathing (not sweets) is a good way to regulate the nervous system. I had been thrust into a fearful situation, but I could also be nurtured back to safety.

Dark arts (and positive ones too)

Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP)

At Hogwarts, they taught the students the Dark Arts, but this wasn't so they could run around being Voldemort wannabes. No, it was because you understand how people with dark intent can and will try to manipulate you. Sadly, this extends to all aspects of life, from politicians to the media, colleagues, and beyond.

It may even be a revelation to you that these exist at all. It's always good to question the intent of a message or visual and to consider whose benefit it serves. The brain is susceptible to programming, which is why hypnosis works, and more importantly, why billions are ploughed into marketing each year. Whatever we see, hear, smell, or sense has an emotional impact on us. Some of these impacts are beneficial, while others are less so, some big, and some small.

Much of this has been condensed into a technique known as Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). NLP began as a model of how we communicate with ourselves and others, developed by Richard Bandler and John Grinder. Here is a positive example of how it may work. I won't discuss dark patterns here, but you can use your imagination to reverse some of this messaging. There are many books out there that explain dark patterns. Those with malicious intent will use them, so for resilience, you may want to check them out so you can be like Gryffindor and protect yourself from Slytherin.

Example scenario: A Product Description Using NLP and Psychological Triggers

Let’s say you’re reading a product description for a fake wellness app:“

Imagine waking up tomorrow feeling refreshed, focused, and completely in control. With just five minutes a day, ImaginaryApp helps you reconnect with your best self effortlessly. Thousands have already experienced the shift. You deserve that too, don’t you?”

Breakdown of the NLP techniques used

1. Embedded commands

“Imagine waking up tomorrow feeling refreshed…”

This subtly directs the reader to visualize a positive outcome, which the brain often interprets as an authentic experience. It creates a mental rehearsal of success.

2. Presuppositions

“With just five minutes a day…”

This assumes the reader will use the app; it skips over "if" and goes straight to how little effort it takes.

3. Pacing and leading

“Thousands have already experienced the shift…”

This builds social proof and momentum, leading the reader to feel like they’re joining a successful movement.

4. Tag questions

“You deserve that too, don’t you?”

This is a soft agreement technique. It encourages the reader to nod internally, reinforcing the message without resistance.

5. Sensory language

“Feeling refreshed, focused, and completely in control…”

These are kinesthetic anchors that evoke physical and emotional sensations, making the experience more vivid and desirable.

Why it works?

This kind of language bypasses critical thinking and taps into the emotional and subconscious mind, where decisions are often made. It doesn’t force the reader; instead, it guides their brain gently toward a positive association with the product. Powerful healing can come from NLP techniques, like all tools.

Brainwashing

Another technique you see used is brainwashing.

The science of brainwashing, also known as coercive persuasion or thought reform, explores how individuals can be manipulated into adopting beliefs or behaviors against their will, often through psychological pressure, isolation, and control of information. Here's a concise summary of the key scientific insights:

Core mechanisms of brainwashing

1. Isolation

Removing the individual from familiar environments and support systems increases dependency on the manipulator. "Join our club, but don't talk to your friends and family; we are your friends and family now."

2. Control of information

Limiting access to outside perspectives and flooding the person with repetitive messaging reinforces the desired beliefs. "All those people, it's their fault, we need to stop them, they don't belong." "Don't listen to that, it’s 'fake news.'"

3. Induced dependency and fear

Creating emotional or physical stress (e.g., sleep deprivation, threats, or rewards) makes the subject more compliant. For example: "The outside world doesn’t understand us. If you leave, you’ll be alone, judged, and lost. Only here are you truly safe and valued. Without us, you’ll fall back into chaos.”

4. Cognitive dissonance

Forcing individuals to act in ways that contradict their beliefs can lead them to modify their beliefs to reduce internal conflict.

5. Gradual escalation (foot-in-the-door technique)

Small commitments are used to build toward larger ones, making it harder to resist over time.

Scientists like Kathleen Taylor from the Department of Physiology, Anatomy, and Genetics at the University of Oxford have distilled the science of brainwashing and its neuroscience into three main areas: Torture and Seduction, The Traitor in Your Skull, and Freedom and Control. Drawing on contexts such as POW camps, politics, and cults, she identifies stages like "breaking down the self" and "rebuilding with new beliefs." It’s well worth reading her book Brainwashing: The Science of Thought Control, specifically the sections on ‘Taking a Stand’, which will equip you with a deeper understanding of tools for resistance. She summarizes pages of high-quality safeguards with this statement: "With understanding comes power, however imperfect: the capacity to change our brains and actions, and our politics, so that ethereal ideas become less lethally attractive. We have that power. We should make the most of it.”

Modern neuroscience shows that repeated exposure to emotionally charged messaging can rewire neural pathways, reinforcing new belief systems.

NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) is sometimes associated with persuasion techniques, though its scientific validity is debated. Debated it may be, as in all science. However, the reality is that it hasn’t stopped billions of dollars from being spent on marketing, which uses these techniques daily. Does it work? Well, I leave you with this: What feeling is invoked when you hear the sound of an ice-cream vendor's bells and sounds?

Tools for the resistance

Physical tools

Much of what I've discussed here focuses on mental management. But even then, things can take a physical toll. It's essential to remember that there are additional tools and techniques we can utilize to become even more resilient. Perhaps the most remarkable people on the planet are those with impairments, who daily demonstrate how they can continue without limbs, sight, or hearing, serving as an inspiring example. These warriors show the rest of us that, no matter what happens, there is still a high quality of life using the right tools for adaptation. I send you all positive thoughts so that you may never need them. But even on another level, we can still use tools and adaptations to our advantage. The right clothes, the right equipment, and the right level of self-care are essential parts of the mix. I sit here with a missing tooth in the back. I spent years grinding my teeth while managing interfamily tension as an executor in my late father's estate. I could have used a gum shield, and it would have been less costly. It wouldn't have addressed the root of the cause, but it would have protected me. Sometimes, you need to find the things that will protect you in the short term while working toward your longer-term strength.

IT tools

As we fully embrace the world of Artificial Intelligence (AI), you may want to choose an ethical and safe provider of an AI agent who can act as your J.A.R.V.I.S. (Iron Man comic/film reference). AI can be used to guide and advise you appropriately, and also in a way that is less likely to be as biased or malicious as a human (if you use the right tools). Be cautious when seeking legal and medical advice. It’s always best to be informed, but seek the assistance of professionals for expert guidance.

Equally, a strong cybersecurity posture is now imperative, not just to protect you individually or your company, but the reputation and security of your workers, clients, and prospects too. Microsoft provides a Security Assessment Tool (MSAT) that offers information and recommendations about best practices for security within an information technology (IT) infrastructure.

Debt tools

Debt charities exist in many developed economies, and responsible lenders usually have processes and procedures in place. I encourage you to reach out to them if you are concerned about what may be about to happen. I’ve walked this path, and I can say the cliff I thought existed is more of a gentle slope. Always keep your creditors informed about your progress and reach out for assistance whenever it is available. There is a whole world out there of untapped, quietly advertised help to support you.

Debt charities exist in many developed economies, and responsible lenders usually have processes and procedures in place. I encourage you to reach out to them if you are concerned about what may be about to happen. I’ve walked this path, and I can say the cliff you may be facing is more of a gentle slope. The key to alleviating your concern is to seek help and engage with those around you who are impacted. Remember that this is typically not a life-and-death situation. Credit ratings do recover.

Spiritual tools

I spent an unhealthy amount of my youth watching horror films. To some extent, it taught me the art of fear and darkness. But it also taught me that spiritual talismans and artifacts could be used as weapons. It was rare for items not to form the basis of many plots that provided positive closure at the end of a ‘good’ horror film. Perhaps one of the most famous portrayals of good versus evil is depicted in the movie The Exorcist. However, to this day, although they may not be overt, these practices of combating evil have been present in many of the world’s mainstream religions and tribal belief systems for centuries.

Now, you don’t need to run around being a Demon Slayer to protect yourself, but you might choose several mainstream practices that are now available.

The Golden Bubble

• Visualize yourself surrounded by a golden bubble of light.

• This bubble acts as a spiritual shield, protecting you from negative energy, psychic attacks, or emotional drain.

White Light Meditation

• Envision a white light descending from above and filling your body.

• This light is meant to cleanse, heal, and protect your aura.

• Often used before sleep or after stressful encounters.

Prayer and Affirmations

• Use affirmations like:

  "The light of the creator protects me. No harm can come to me."To help protect yourself from harm, or choose your favourite religious mantra or prayer. The science, psychology, and metaphysics of prayer are ever evolving, and indications are positive.

Avoiding Energy Vampires

• Some people unconsciously drain others’ energy. I saw the term "Energy Vampire" several years ago, and I’ve stuck with it. You may recognise these people as those who have nothing good to say, make you feel bad, and generally drain you of your energy in your exchanges with them.

• Recognize these patterns and limit exposure, or use shielding techniques when interacting with such individuals. Some of them may also fall into the realm of being toxic, so you may want to check out my previous article on dealing with toxic managers.

Grounding Techniques

• Connect with nature through visualization or physical contact, e.g., walking barefoot on grass, forest bathing, hugging trees, lying on the ground, whatever feels right to you.

• There is a growing amount of evidence to suggest that nature helps us to release excess energy and restore balance. One book my brother Mark recently passed on to me was Rewild Your Mind by Nick Goldsmith, a former Royal Marine Commando. Having spoken to her earlier in the year, I’m super excited about Clara Schroeder’s new book, Re-Nature: How Nature Helps Us Feel Better and Do Better, which comes out later in 2025.

Ethical considerations

You need to remember that most people are largely awesome, but the Empire is out there, so train yourself to be a Jedi to face them.

While understanding these mechanisms is essential for education, therapy, and protection against manipulation, using dark techniques for your gain, with dark intent, or unethically, is harmful and coercive. Ethical influence respects autonomy and informed consent. I, as a writer, encourage you to use this content in a manner that respects these principles.

Nutrition tools

Your body and mind can’t function optimally without the right fuel. Different foods mess with your body chemistry in various ways. You may be your enemy when it comes to resilience from this perspective. Drink lots of caffeine, and you’ll become more susceptible to anxiety and heart palpitations. Drink loads of alcohol, and you’ll mess with your mind and body. I’ve done my bottle (or two) of wine-a-night habit, which was occasionally fun. Mostly not. I feel more regulated without it. In the end, being sick in the mornings was the message I needed to hear from my body that it was too much destruction. I missed the sugar that gave me an initial boost. Then I stopped missing it altogether. Eva and her Mind and Body coaching introduced me to different foods and drinks that filled the void more positively: kombucha, cacao, and water. When you break things down, you can live a humble but wholesome and low-cost diet. Oats, eggs, and yoghurt are some of my weekly staples now. There is a new kid on the block, too. I say new, but it’s ancient. Mushrooms are being recognized here in ‘developed’ countries for what they already are in some other countries around the world. Csilla Gindorf, a friend of mine, pulled herself out of her darkness with the power of mushrooms and adaptogens. Now she packages her form of resilience in some amazing Lucid food bars, which feel like they are manna from elves. This demonstrates that there is a lot about nature’s food that we seem to have forgotten, for example:

Reishi – can be used to treat anxiety

Lion’s Mane – can bring mental clarity

Cordyceps – energy

Final thought

Those in the entertainment industry are often subjected to abuse, insults, lewd comments, and unwanted attention. It must be a tremendously difficult job to maintain your internal strength while rising above challenges and continuing to create art for the happiness of others. I could have chosen many examples, but as I wrote this article, I was reminded of Kylie Minogue, someone whom, since I was young, I’ve been drawn to for having a lot of grace. No matter what the media, health, or negative relationships threw at her, she continued with an amazing positive intent in life. Pop star resilience, you could say.

I also came across the concept of Tall Poppy Syndrome in an early interview with Kylie. I had not come across this before, but the moment you start to stand firm, there's always a chance someone will try to cut you down, much in the way that someone may attempt to chop poppies down to make a field uniform in height. As you demonstrate resilience, some people may try to cut you down through dark intent, fear, envy, or just the discomfort of you being yourself. The media are well known for this, but it also happens on a business-to-business, person-to-person, or group-to-person level. Try not to let yourself shrink. The more you do so, the more you may feel disconnected from your true north. It’s not threatening to grow; it’s nature! Keep growing, and you’ll impact more than just those who hate growth; you'll also inspire those who want to be free to grow. Haters often harbor self-loathing in some way and project it onto others. It’s important to remember that. Always question the visual, auditory, kinesthetic, and olfactory messages you receive and to whose intent they genuinely serve. It’s easier to spot weird currents when they start to flow in odd ways, particularly when they’re away from the way they were flowing in the first place.

Reach out to Lightrise or Gareth personally for guidance and support in building personal or business resilience driven by positive impacts.

Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info!

Read more from Gareth Edward Jones

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Gareth Edward Jones, Visionary Technology Leader, Environmentalist, And Social Impact Advocate

Gareth Edward Jones is a visionary technology leader, environmentalist, and social impact advocate with over two decades of experience at the intersection of people, purpose, and digital transformation. A CIO Times Top 5 Business Leader (2024–25), and Executive Contributor for Brainz Magazine. Gareth is the founder and CEO of Lightrise, where he champions ethical innovation, ESG-driven strategy, and inclusive technology solutions.