Cognitive Behaviour – Our Thoughts, Our Future
- Brainz Magazine
- 5 days ago
- 6 min read
Donna Reynolds empowers clients to build confidence, understanding it as the foundation for achieving personal goals. With experience working with people of all ages, her Confidence is Key approach helps foster a positive mindset, enabling individuals to move forward with clarity, self-assurance, and resilience.
If someone were standing in front of you right now and asked, “What would you like your future to be like?” How would you answer? Would your response be positive or negative? Hopeful or hesitant? What would that future actually look like for you? And do you truly feel you have control over it?
These are all valid questions. Important questions. And they are ones we should really sit up and take notice of. Because the truth is, we do have a say in what our future looks like.
But when we answer that question, we need to be honest with ourselves. Are we responding from a place of possibility, or from wounds carried over from our past? Have previous experiences shaped a belief that we cannot have the future we want?
Are we still carrying beliefs that were never ours to begin with, beliefs handed down by someone else who may have been carrying their own negative story? At some point, that cycle has to stop. Isn’t it time to say enough? Enough doubting. Enough shrinking. Enough believing we are less than we are.
You are good enough. You can do this for yourself. You can create an amazing future. There is no reason why any of us cannot have the future we dream about.
And if that starts with rebuilding your confidence, then you are in the right place. Because that is what I do. I help people rebuild confidence and resilience, especially those who had it taken away from them. More often than not, the person responsible is no longer even in their lives.
So let us move forward with new beliefs about who you are and what is possible for your future. Give it a go and see what happens. Give yourself permission to believe you are worth it. Take it day by day. And start creating the future you deserve.
Discovering cognitive behaviour
When I first started this journey, I had no idea what Cognitive Behaviour actually was. People would say, “Yeah, I’ve had CBT,” and I would reply, “Really? Nice!” without truly knowing what it meant. But once I got into the bones of it, something clicked. It just felt right. It aligned with who I am as a person. What followed genuinely blew my mind.
The twists and turns that showed up in my life started teaching me more and more. Sometimes it was a book someone recommended. Sometimes a quote someone sent. Other times, I was introduced to an idea or experience I had never considered before. And when I stayed open, really open, my experience has been that it helped far more than it ever hindered me.
Growing into this mindset has literally changed my life. It has changed me as a parent, a friend, an entrepreneur, and simply as a person. My life shifted because I allowed myself to change the way I think. Now, when I find myself in a situation that does not feel quite right, or when I notice I am getting stuck and starting to spiral in my thoughts, I pause. I stop and look at things differently.
People often say, “That cannot be done.” My response is simple. If you can have one thought, you can have another. It really is that simple. It starts with giving yourself permission to believe that change is possible. That is the foundation of a new way of thinking. Thoughts lead to feelings. Feelings lead to behaviours. Behaviours shape outcomes. Change the thought, and everything else can follow.
A real-life shift in thinking
I was recently in a meeting. Before I arrived, I had everything typed up and thought I knew exactly what I was going to say because I was prepared. I sat around the table listening to what everyone else was sharing, and I noticed something important.
There was a time when my thoughts would have sounded like this. They are amazing. They are doing so much better than me. I cannot follow that. I am embarrassed. What if they think I am an idiot? What if I mess this up? But none of that went through my head.
Instead, I looked at my paper and thought, that is only a fraction of what I have achieved. So I made a decision in that moment. I was not just going to talk about one small part of the year. I was going to go back to the root of where the year began and share how far I had actually come.
And do you know what happened? No one reacted negatively. Because where I am now, I understand something I did not before. When someone is mean or negative, it says far more about how they feel about themselves than it ever does about you. That shift in thinking has changed everything.
The message behind the quotes
This is Cognitive Behaviour in action. Changing your thoughts can literally change your life. You have probably heard phrases like these before. Think positively. When you change your thoughts, you can change your life. You have the power to change your life. What you think, you become. What you feel, you attract. What you imagine, you create. Your thoughts create your outcome. We do not control others, but we do control our reactions.
Every one of these is really asking the same question. What do you want your future to look like? Because when you change the way you think, you change how you feel. When you change how you feel, you change how you behave. And when you change your behaviour, you change your life.
Looking back and moving forward
That meeting took me back to this time last year. I was initially ready to say I was proud of finishing my book and proud that I had the confidence to share it with others and allow them to proofread it. And I am proud of that. But then I realised something important.
The book is the final chapter of this year. Around this time last year, I became an Executive Contributor for Brainz Magazine. I know this because my family arrived shortly afterwards for Christmas, and yes, they have reminded me. Instead of focusing on what I had achieved in the last month, I reflected on how far I had come.
Writing articles led me to create three CPD approved courses on mental health. And now, I have finished my book. If someone had told me years ago that I would do any of this, I know exactly what would have happened. I would have heard other people’s voices in my head. What are you thinking? Who do you think you are? Do not embarrass yourself. You are dyslexic. No one would read it.
Back then, I would have believed every single one of those sentences. But this time last year, those thoughts were not there. Instead, my mindset was simple. Why not? What is the worst that can happen? So I became an Executive Contributor. I discovered that I love writing. I find it therapeutic. And the response from others has been incredible.
No one said the things I had been told in the past. They said my writing was amazing. They said it was relatable and easy to read. And here is the truth. Had I continued listening to those old voices, I would not be a therapist. I would not be a writer. I would not be sharing my work. I would not be doing what I love today. Changing my thoughts has quite literally changed my life. So this is my final thought.
I am beyond proud of what I have achieved so far, and I cannot wait to see what opportunities unfold next. And when they do, I will grab them with both hands. Because instead of feeling dread when I am asked to do something new, I now genuinely feel excited. That is how you change your thoughts and change your life. That is Cognitive Behaviour.
Read more from Donna Kirsten Reynolds
Donna Kirsten Reynolds, Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist
Donna Reynolds discovered her passion for mental health and personal growth while living abroad and navigating her own challenges. After experiencing a sudden divorce that mirrored the struggles of many women around her, Donna sought to understand why such upheavals were so common. This quest led her to study mental health and behavior, ultimately guiding her to Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy. She believes that by changing our thoughts, we can overcome any barriers and create meaningful, lasting change in our lives.
