Written by: Tanja Bogataj, M.Sc., Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Often when we are faced with a certain change, we might feel stuck and powerless, or at least not as strong as we would like to feel. We even sometimes procrastinate with necessary changes because we are afraid of the consequences, potential failure, potential loss, or messiness in between. In these situations we rather choose to use our power for change for keeping the status quo, or making change with some slow improvements and adjustment, instead of surrendering to the process of change as it’s needed.
Create a positive change
In this article I invite you in your world of change and change, and share with you 3 secrets that will help you create a positive change in any challenging situation. If you choose to get equipped and guided through your process of change in a faster, impactful way fulfilling, and impactful way, feel free to connect now to Get Empowered2Impact and/ or to find the powerforchange.world.
Change and aesistance to change
“Let those who want to change the world, first change themselves”, “If you want to make the change, put all your energy into the new, and stop fighting the old”, “Change yourself, change your world”, “Change is the only constant in life”, “If you change the way you look at things, things you’re looking at will change”, “Change is inevitable, growth is optional” are just few out of many drops of wisdom on the change and changing, learned from human experience, exchanged throughout the history and transferred from generation to generation.
It sounds so simple. If you want to make a change, just make one. It starts with you. Just do it. Hm, how come we then struggle with changes and changing process going through life and facing life challenges? How come we are not always able to thrive through the experience? What are we actually saying when we say I want change, I need to change, I desire change, etc.? Let’s go deeper into the world of change and changing so we get closer to what’s the real challenge and question here. Change is an act or process through which something becomes different. It means to replace something with something else, to substitute one thing for another. When one thing ‒ form, expression or function – is converted into another one, we are talking about the process of transformation. This means, if change happens, what was before will no longer exists. Are we ready for this to happen? Are we willing to make this exchange? Are we willing to take an active role in this changing process, or rather stay in a more passive one? Let’s check ourselves where we are with the idea of change and changing with few warm-up questions:
What kind of changes do you usually like to make?
Which change are you resisting the most/the longest?
If you have a magic wand to change 1 thing in your life, which change you’d choose?
What’s one fear you have in relation to the idea of change?
In which areas of your life are you currently in ‘trying to change mode’?
What would change for you, if there is no trying, either you make the change, or you don’t?
How would your today (and tomorrow) look/feel like, if you do the needed change today?
How would your today (and tomorrow) look/feel like, if you do the desired change today?
How would your today (and tomorrow) change, if you’re thinking about change and changing?
Any inspiring thoughts and insights? It’s not always easy to work with change, and ever more challenging to make one. There are few ways though that can make change and changing inspiring challenge, and with that also easier. Let’s dive further together so we get closer to those 3 secrets that I’ve promised you in the title of this article. Patti Johnson identifies in her book Make waves (2014:18) five common obstacles that keep us from being wave makers (meaning: being the ones who start the change at work and in life). These 5 obstacles are: fear of being wrong, being inadequate, or hurting our standing; lack of accountability – the unspoken belief that someone else will do it; assumptions about what’s important and what will work; procrastination, which delays action; and perfectionism, which makes us feel we are never ready. Sounds familiar? I challenge you now to select one concrete change that you need/want to make in your life, and check by yourself these following 4 assumptions that, according to Johnson (2014:26-28), usually get in our way:
1. Don’t know enough
To make it easier, I offer you few questions for self-exploration: Is this True? What is True? What you Do Know? What you Can Do?
2. It’s not my job
To make it easier, I offer you few questions for self-exploration: Why you‘re thinking about this (thinking about other people’s business in Byron Katie’s words), if it’s not your job? What are your thoughts/beliefs behind this statement? What is your job then?
3. This may not work
To make it easier, I offer you few questions for self-exploration: What’s the fear behind? What’s the worst that can happen, if ‘this may not work’? Which are 3 good things that might happen, if you do it anyway? What’s your new idea that might work and you’re willing to test it out?
4. Someoneelse will do it
To make it easier, I offer you few questions for self-exploration: What’s your intention behind this assumption? What this kind of thinking brings you? What if no one else will do it? What if this is actually yours to do, are you okay to not do it?
“There is a lot of energy invested in ‘trying’, but not much real power in it. While there is very focused energy and power in ‘making a choice’. Either you do it, or you don’t.” ‒Tanja Bogataj
The process of change and transformation
There are different changes that we face throughout our life and living. Evelien Van Es in her book Be Relentlessly Yourself And, Take On Life (2021) says, ‘Sometimes you need to change, either to stay yourself, or to become yourself.”. The art of changing is a life skill that we are developing throughout life, living, becoming, growing, and creating. It means understanding, accepting and embracing the whole process of changing. It’s about how to go through a transformation from one state to the other powerfully and with grace. Like going through the hardship with your heart and eyes wide open, and still smiling from within. It’s about going through the process and following the flow, by being open to learn what you need to learn, with letting go and letting in, with allowing the transformation to happen. It’s about continuing the path by gaining inner wisdom of who you are now becoming through this process and what’s your ‘next’. And it never stops. It keeps happening. The process of changing can start if you accept it or not. But when you accept it, you can start practicing the skill and art of change. Only when you dive into the change, you can realize that change and changing as the process become the teacher. It’s the trust in the process that gives you the strength. It’s the reflection of the new you and what you’re creating that awakens and strengthens the inner power to keep going. The reward is the empowerment for your life, and more enjoyment in your life. "To know that you know what you know, and that you do not know what you do not know, that is the biggest knowledge of all." This thought from Lao Tzu can serve you as a helpful guidance while going through the unknown, transforming and integrating the known and unknown, and allowing the change to happen within your heart and your mind.
“When we change, the world changes.The key to all change is in our inner transformation - a change of our hearts and minds. This is human revolution. We all have the power to change. When we realize this truth, we can bring that power forth anywhere, anytime, and in any situation.” ‒ DaisakuIkeda
I hear you saying now, “Wonderfully said. I want to tap into this kind of inner power to change. I want to create this positive change in any challenging situation, and thrive personally and professionally. But, how can I? Where are those 3 promised secrets that can help?” Thank you for your question. You’re right where you need to be. Your doors are ready to open for you. Are you ready to step through?
3 secrets to master the art of change and keep thriving
Secret 1 Crystal-clear why
Do some good thinking, some deep contemplating. Get the clarity on WHY you REALLY want the change. Dig deep, and go even deeper, if needed. Peel off layers of ‘it would be good, I should/ could/would, I think it would help, if everyone says, maybe because of this, maybe because of that, maybe just maybe if, etc. Keep peeling off till you come to ‘this is my crystal-clear why, and it’s done’.
Secret 2 Show up your change everyday anyway
Be there for yourself, and your change. Not on auto-pilot, not half present. Fully present. It’s a day-to-day practice. Acknowledge daily improvement. Celebrate the process and your upgrade.
Make it simple and enjoyable for yourself. If, and when it gets challenging, make a challenge to challenge the challenge. Go in anyway. Show up anyway. Do what needs to be done anyway.
Secret 3 Commit to 'it's done'
Leading the change starts with you. It can start today, or tomorrow, or never. Be courageous, and start today, anyway. Be creative, and create the change your desire to create, anyway. Believe in the process of change.
Be a doer. Are you ready?
If you are the change you wish to see in this world, which change are you? How does this show throughout your day-to-day living? If you’d start to be this change today, how will this change your today/week/month/year/life? Ready to commit? Let’s do this in 1-2-3 flow:
1. Choose the change you’re starting today
2 - Write down what’s your inspiration and determination (your why) to start the change/to stay within the process of change/to complete the change
3 - Add the date and your signature on this commitment
If you’re ready to go deeper, higher, and further, feel free to connect to get some help for your exponential change/impact-making. Maybe my online program might be just the right fit for you. I wish you all the best on your journey. Enjoy the process! When in doubt, if you can change, be reminded that the change is already happening. The question is, if you are an active creator of this change or a passive participant. The choice is yours. Make some great choices for yourself today!
Tanja Bogataj, M.Sc., Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Tanja Bogataj, M.Sc. (www.tanjabogataj.com | tanjabogatajcoaching@gmail.com) is a Leadership Coach and Consultant, Founder of the bepowerfulandfree® approach. Founder and CEO of the Power for Change Institute. Tanja’s motto “In the world where you can be anything, choose to be powerful and free while making a difference”.
Sources and References:
Evelien Van Es, Be Relentlessly YourselfAnd, Take On Life!, Motivation Champs Publishing US, 2021;
Patti Johnson, Make waves, Be the One to Start Change at Work and in Life, Bibliomotion, 2014;
Tanja Bogataj, How to lead yourself in challenging times, published article in BusinessFit Magazine, May 2022;
