Written by Manuel Aragon, Tax Consultant & Advisory Planner Manuel Aragon is a Colorado entrepreneur with a deep background in business, tax preparation, advisory, and planning. He has served as a Chief Financial Officer (CFO), Operations Manager, Finance Director, and Consultant. I just landed back home from an incredible trip to London, where I was honored and recognized as a Global Power Leader. Stepping onto another international stage was a dream come true, an unforgettable moment when the cameras flashed, hands were shaken, and words of praise filled the room. But on the long, quiet flight back across the ocean, far away from the applause, a heavy thought kept circling in my mind: elevation changes everything, and not always in the ways I expected. When an airplane climbs high into the atmosphere, the cabin pressure shifts and the air outside gets thin. There is less oxygen up there, making every single breath take a little more conscious effort. But even more critical than the altitude is an aviation concept pilots know all too well: the "point of no return." It’s the exact moment in a flight when the plane no longer has enough fuel left in its tank to turn around and head back to where it took off. The only option I have left is to push forward into the unknown, no matter what lies ahead. “I literally do not have enough fuel left in my tank to go backward. The energy, time, sacrifice, and heartache it took to get to this height mean the old version of my life can no longer hold me.” In my life, my leadership, and my personal growth, I have reached my own point of no return. Most people assume that as I achieve greater success and fly farther away from where I started, life automatically becomes easier, lighter, and happier. They see the awards, the trips, and the titles, and they think I’ve reached a place of complete peace. But the truth is much more raw and vulnerable than that. As I fly farther away from my beginnings, I have to acknowledge a deep pain and emotional hurt that I didn't anticipate. I genuinely thought reaching this level would bring pure happiness and satisfaction, but instead, I find myself feeling more exhausted and lonely than ever. There are nights when the quiet is deafening. The higher you climb, the smaller your inner circle becomes, and the harder it is to find people who truly understand the silent pressure you carry. You start to realize that the people you used to lean on can't meet you at this altitude, not because they don't care, but because the air is simply too thin for them to breathe. Reaching this stage doesn't mean I don't love where I came from. It isn't because I don't care about the people, the old memories, or the familiar comfort of my past. It’s simply a matter of reality: I literally do not have enough fuel left in my tank to go backward. The energy, time, sacrifice, and heartache it took for me to get to this height mean the old version of my life can no longer hold me. The pain I feel isn't a sign that I'm on the wrong path; it's the physical and mental weight of leaving the ground behind. Lessons from history: The one-way mission History shows us that real impact always comes with heavy sacrifice, deep personal cost, and moments of intense isolation. Think back to World War II, in the months following the devastating attack on Pearl Harbor in December 1941. The nation was reeling, wounded, and in pain. To restore hope and prove that the country would not break, Lieutenant Colonel James Doolittle led a legendary strike known as the Doolittle Raid. Sixteen B-25 bombers launched from the deck of an aircraft carrier in the Pacific Ocean. Because they were forced to launch early under intense danger, the crews faced the risk of running out of fuel before reaching their planned landing sites in China. It was a one-way mission into enemy territory, with no planned return to the carrier. Those crews didn't take off because they were numb to fear, immune to pain, or indifferent to their lives and families back home. They took off despite their fear, grief, and exhaustion because they knew what they had signed up for. They understood that protecting the future and guarding everything that had been built before them meant carrying the heavy hurt of the present and pressing on when there was no turning back. Stepping into legacy When I stepped into my purpose and pushed for true global impact, I signed up for my own one-way mission. I understand now that this may be a solo mission, and I may never get to go back to the simplicity of where I started. My exhaustion is real, and the loneliness at high altitudes hurts deeply. It’s a quiet ache that sits in your chest when you realize that achieving your dreams doesn't erase your personal scars. Sometimes, it just makes them clearer. People from my past might not understand why I can't just "turn around" and return to how things used to be. They don't see the thin air, the heavy baggage I've had to drop, or my empty fuel gauge. They only see where I landed, not the turbulence it took to stay in the air. But I understand that legacy isn't built in the comfortable safety of the hangar. Legacy is forged when I acknowledge the pain, embrace the exhaustion, allow myself to feel the loneliness, and keep flying forward anyway. I've put in the work. I've climbed the distance. I won't waste my remaining energy trying to fly backward into a past that can no longer sustain me. I'm going to keep pushing toward the runway ahead. This is my point of no return. Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Manuel Aragon Manuel Aragon, Tax Consultant & Advisory Planner Manuel Aragon has elite expertise in tax preparation, accounting, finance, cash planning, and tax strategy. Manuel has delivered modern, innovative financial solutions, driving growth and efficiency for multiple companies in Colorado. His leadership and approach have solidified a reputation for excellence, onboarding, and overall client satisfaction. Continues to serve in multiple roles across the Front Range as a Tax Preparer, Chief Financial Officer (CFO), Operations Manager, Finance Director, and Consultant.

Written by Monsieur Chase Estevez, Founder & CEO of Estevez Clothing Co. Monsieur Chase Estevez is the founder and owner of Estevez Clothing Co. He is well known for using his 15+ years of experience in the tailoring industry, image consulting, and personal presence coaching to serve clients all around the world. His mission is to help others align their appearance and presence, bringing out their ultimate confidence. Before you get the money, you must have fulfillment within yourself. Even after getting the money, you need a structured foundation. Money can turn any one of us evil. Throughout this article, I will ask random questions that I want you to think about and answer quietly to yourself. Search your soul for the answers. “For what is a man profited if he gains the whole world and loses or forfeits himself?” – Luke 9:25 What does money mean to you? When we are kids, we are not thinking about playing sports for the money. We play because it’s fun to us. We loved the thrill of letting our imagination run wild with all the unrealistic ways we could. We did it for the love of the game. We often see clips of Tom Brady and Michael Jordan talking about the love they had for their respective sports when they played. Michael Jordan even had a clause in his contract with the Chicago Bulls that allowed him to play basketball whenever he wanted. It was not the money that drove them to success, but their passion, love, and dedication to their careers. How much does money consume you? Let me state this: money is not evil or bad, but it is the 'love' of money that is evil. A lot of us only do a job or engage in legal or illegal activities for the money. When you were a kid, what did you tell your parents you wanted to be when you grew up? I used to want to be a firefighter. Why, you ask? I have no idea now, but that was the first career I wanted. It was not based on money or accolades, but just the love and passion I had for that job when I was a kid. A lot of happiness for us adults refers back to our childhood. That was a safe space for many of us and a trusted space. How often do we judge someone by their title and salary? Let us touch ground here for a hot second. I know everyone cannot do exactly what they love and are passionate about as their profession. It’s just not possible, but I will say, let your passion be something you do that still has a reference to childhood happiness or newfound adult happiness. Money cannot buy happiness, but it can buy material things, time, convenience, exclusivity, etc. Money will never buy peace, joy, understanding, knowledge, integrity, or love. How much would you change if you had the amount of money you think about? We all work in our careers to provide for ourselves and our families. There are very few people in this world who get paid an extremely high amount of money and absolutely love what they do. Either they learned to love it, and the job grew on them, or they already loved their career choice and went right into it. I’ll leave you, readers, with this: money does not make you cool, money gets you seen, money does not make you attractive, money makes you look better, money does not make you complete, it makes you above average financially, money does not get you closer to God, it reveals who you truly are. Follow me on Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Monsieur Chase Estevez Monsieur Chase Estevez, Founder & CEO of Estevez Clothing Co. Monsieur Chase Estevez built his life around a profound belief: Make people feel good. He is the founder and owner of Estevez Clothing Co., a bespoke tailoring company focused on custom-fitted garments and refined wardrobe solutions for men and women. Beyond apparel, his work focuses on aligning personal appearance and inner confidence so every client steps out looking and feeling unstoppable. He shares insights on style, dating, lifestyle, success, and the subtle mechanics of presence to help you live your best life.

Written by Erika Allison, Founder of NuFeet Medical Pedicures® Erika Allison is the founder of NuFeet Medical Pedicures® and creator of the medical pedicure business model, pioneering a private, condition-based approach to pedicures that incorporates physician collaboration. Through education, consulting, and live events, she has trained professionals worldwide and helped transform the pedicure industry. Since I introduced the term Medical Pedicure® in 2012, I have watched it become one of the most debated phrases in the nail industry. The conversation has grown louder over the years, but one thing has remained consistent: many of the people criticizing the term have never actually provided collaborative pedicure services, worked alongside podiatrists, or, in many cases, cared for clients with complex foot conditions. When I chose the name Medical Pedicure®, it was never intended to mislead the public into believing I was a physician. Quite the opposite. The entire concept was built around collaboration with physicians. I noticed there was a significant population of people who were under the care of a podiatrist, or clearly needed to see one, but still required routine foot care that physicians often do not provide. They still needed their toenails safely reduced. They still needed painful calluses managed. They still deserved a clean, comfortable, professional pedicure experience that respected their medical journey rather than ignored it. Choosing the name Medical Pedicure® was also a strategic marketing decision, and one that accomplished exactly what it was intended to do. People searching for help with thick toenails, painful calluses, diabetic foot concerns, or other foot problems were not searching for a “spa pedicure.” They were looking for something beyond cosmetic care. At the same time, podiatrists generally do not provide pedicures, and many state-licensed nail technicians without additional education or specialized certifications may not have been trained to recognize warning signs that warrant a referral or to work safely within their scope of practice while caring for higher-risk clients. Medical Pedicure® helped bridge that gap. The name communicated that this was a specialized pedicure focused on clients with problematic feet and, most importantly, one that encouraged collaboration with physicians rather than replacing them. It gave the public a way to find the help they needed while creating an opportunity for the nail industry and podiatry to work together for the benefit of the client. In more than a decade of providing Medical Pedicures®, I have never had a client sit in my chair believing I was a foot doctor. Not once. What I have experienced are countless clients who appreciated having someone who understood when to help, when to refer, and how to work alongside their physician rather than attempting to replace one. Unfortunately, as with any growing industry, controversy follows popularity. There will always be individuals who skip the education, ignore proper training, avoid professional certifications, and simply give themselves a title because it sounds impressive. We see it every day. There are people providing manicures and pedicures without ever attending cosmetology school. That does not invalidate the profession of licensed nail technicians. It simply means there are people practicing without the appropriate qualifications. The same applies to those calling themselves “Licensed Medical Nail Technicians.” To my knowledge, that title is inaccurate because no state currently licenses someone specifically as a Medical Nail Technician. States license nail technicians or cosmetologists. Additional education and certifications are exactly that: education and certifications. The misuse of a title should never define an entire specialty. Today, however, I believe defining Medical Pedicures® has become more complicated for another reason. Social media. I regularly see viral videos advertising “medical pedicures” where the client has perfectly healthy feet. No discolored nails. No painful calluses. No nail deformities. No skin conditions. No real concerns whatsoever. In my opinion, that is not a Medical Pedicure®. That is simply a pedicure. Whether it is performed without water, without soaking, or with more rigorous infection control procedures, it is still a pedicure if there is no underlying condition requiring specialized care or collaboration with a physician. To me, a Medical Pedicure® begins when there is a legitimate foot concern. Perhaps the client has thick, painful toenails that no longer fit comfortably inside their shoes. Maybe they have severe calluses causing discomfort while walking. Perhaps they have chronic athlete's foot, discolored nails requiring diagnostic testing, psoriasis affecting the nails, or another condition that warrants communication with a podiatrist. That relationship is what makes the service different. If there is no need for collaboration, no medical concern to monitor, no referral to make, and no specialized management beyond a routine cosmetic service, then it is simply a pedicure. A wonderful pedicure, perhaps a waterless pedicure, a dry pedicure, or a soakless pedicure, but still a pedicure. Our industry has specialists, just as every profession does. Specialists invest in advanced education, equipment, and protocols. Naturally, their pricing reflects that expertise. My own experience at NuFeet taught me this lesson very clearly. Ironically, some of the most difficult clients we ever served were those who had absolutely nothing wrong with their feet. They focused almost entirely on polish perfection. They expected baby-soft feet for weeks without performing any home care. They wanted flawless results while refusing to exfoliate or apply moisturizer between appointments. I even remember one celebrity client who contacted me a week after her appointment because her feet were beginning to feel rough again. I asked a simple question, “Have you been exfoliating and applying your moisturizer?” Her answer was, “No.” No pedicure, cosmetic or medical, can keep feet looking flawless indefinitely without routine maintenance at home. One review has stayed with me throughout my career. A gentleman scheduled what he insisted on calling a Medical Pedicure®. After evaluating his feet, we explained that he technically did not need one. His feet were healthy. We even offered him our standard waterless pedicure instead. He insisted on the Medical Pedicure®. So, we performed a thorough foot assessment. There were no abnormalities. No referral was necessary. No collaboration with a physician was appropriate because nothing was wrong. In the end, he left a review saying he did not see a difference. The reality was simple. There was nothing problematic about his feet, so no correction was needed. On the other hand, our most appreciative clients were those who truly needed the service. Clients who arrived with toenails so thick they could barely wear shoes comfortably. Clients who walked in limping because painful calluses had changed the way they walked. Clients who had been embarrassed by their feet for years. Many left smiling. Some became emotional. Others joked that they walked in limping and danced out the door. We rarely polished their nails. They were not coming for polish. They were coming for relief. Those clients became our greatest advocates. People traveled from different states because they could not find that level of specialized foot care where they lived. That experience shaped my understanding of what a Medical Pedicure® truly is. It is not defined by an autoclave. Properly cleaning, disinfecting, or sterilizing instruments, as required, should already be the professional standard. It is not defined by wearing gloves. It is not even defined solely by performing a thorough foot assessment, although every advanced pedicurist should perform one within their scope of practice. A Medical Pedicure® is defined by its purpose. It exists to safely care for individuals with problematic feet while recognizing the limits of our scope of practice and working collaboratively with physicians whenever appropriate. It is about helping clients on their journey toward healthier feet, not pretending to replace medical care. That collaboration has always been the foundation of the service I envisioned in 2012, and I believe it should remain its defining characteristic today. Medical Pedicures® are not for everyone. They were never meant to be. They are for people living with foot concerns that require specialized knowledge, thoughtful assessment, appropriate referrals, and compassionate care. For everyone else, there is absolutely nothing wrong with calling it what it is. A pedicure. The debate surrounding Medical Pedicures® should not be about the name itself. It should be about protecting the public through proper education, ethical practice, and collaboration with physicians. If we define the service by its purpose instead of assumptions, we can move beyond controversy and focus on what truly matters: helping people with problematic feet receive the specialized care they deserve while ensuring they are referred for medical diagnosis and treatment whenever necessary. Follow me on Instagram, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Erika Allison Erika Allison, Founder of NuFeet Medical Pedicures® Erika Allison is the founder of NuFeet Medical Pedicures® and creator of the medical pedicure business model. In 2012, she introduced a private, condition-based approach to pedicures that helped bridge the gap between the beauty and medical industries through physician collaboration and specialized foot care services. As an educator, speaker, inventor, and entrepreneur, she has trained professionals worldwide and developed innovative programs and products that have helped reshape the pedicure industry. Through her courses, consulting, and live events, Erika continues to advance professional standards and elevate the way pedicures are delivered around the world.

Written by Annie Paraison, Founder of Love Before ALL LLC Annie Paraison, the visionary behind Love Before ALL, is a Cultural Architect who leverages over 17 years of leadership experience to demonstrate that love is a strategic necessity. She helps leaders, businesses, and communities operationalize love to optimize personal, organizational, and communal wellness and collective success. We keep sending people to communication workshops. We buy them new conflict resolution scripts. We hand them frameworks for difficult conversations and acronyms for active listening. And then we watch in quiet frustration as the same patterns return, sometimes before the training invoice is even paid. What if the problem was never the script? What if the reason nothing sticks is that we are trying to upgrade software installed in a body that is running on a completely different operating system, one that answers not to logic but to safety? The workshop that cannot reach them Every year, organizations invest enormous sums in communication training, conflict resolution programming, and leadership development workshops. The skills being taught are often sound. Active listening. Feedback frameworks. Nonviolent communication. De-escalation protocols. On paper, these tools should work. And sometimes, in the calm of a training room, they do. Then Monday arrives. The budget conversation gets tense. The deadline moves up. Two colleagues re-enter the dynamic that has always made them defensive around each other. And within moments, every script from the workshop evaporates because the nervous system took over, and the nervous system was never in the room. Research consistently confirms that psychological safety is the foundation of effective communication. Without it, people self-censor, avoid conflict, withhold difficult information, and perform what researchers call “professional theatre” rather than having real conversations. But here is what most communication training misses entirely: psychological safety is not a mindset. It is a physiological state. You cannot think your way into feeling safe. Safety is something your body decides, and it decides faster than your prefrontal cortex can intervene. Until organizations begin to address the nervous system that shows up to every meeting, every performance review, and every difficult conversation, the scripts will keep failing. Not because the people in the room lack intelligence or commitment. Because the body leads, and strategy follows. What the body already knows Dr. Stephen Porges, the behavioral neuroscientist who developed Polyvagal Theory, offers one of the most important insights for organizational leaders that most leadership literature has not yet caught up with. The nervous system responds to perceived safety, not logic or intention. Before a person can engage socially, collaborate, problem-solve, or receive feedback, their autonomic nervous system must first assess whether the environment is safe enough to allow it. Polyvagal Theory describes three hierarchical states of the nervous system, each shaping behavior in profoundly different ways. When a person feels safe, the ventral vagal state supports connection, creativity, and genuine collaboration. When a threat is perceived, the sympathetic state activates mobilization: fight or flight. When the threat feels overwhelming and inescapable, the dorsal vagal state triggers shutdown, disconnection, and collapse. Research shows that the tone a leader sets directly shapes the emotional and functional dynamics of their team through what Porges calls co-regulation: the biological reality that regulated nervous systems have the capacity to help other nervous systems regulate. The inverse is equally true. A dysregulated leader creates a dysregulated team, not through intention but through physiology. When leaders behave anxiously, research shows that it lowers employee morale and performance. Elevated cortisol levels in one person can trigger hormonal changes in those observing them. Tense communication becomes common, decisions are rushed, requests feel abrupt, and what could have been a minor misunderstanding escalates under the cumulative weight of stress that the room was already carrying before anyone said a word. This is not a metaphor. It is measurable biology. And it is the reason that the smartest, most well-intentioned communication initiative in the world will not produce lasting change if the leader standing at the front of the room is operating from their sympathetic nervous system while asking their team to feel safe. Stress contagion is not a metaphor The phrase “stress is contagious” sounds like something you might read on a wellness blog. The science behind it is considerably more serious. A 2025 study published in the Journal of Management & Organization confirmed that work stress spreads through teams via emotional contagion, with employees who are constantly exposed to a high-stress environment experiencing burnout even when their own individual workloads are balanced. The proposed mechanism is physiological: systems in our brains can cause us to unconsciously mimic and resonate with the emotional states of those around us. Daniel Goleman, whose foundational work on emotional intelligence has shaped decades of leadership thinking, describes the phenomenon directly: the leader’s mood is contagious, spreading quickly and influencing the emotional climate of the entire team. Leaders who exhibit positive emotions such as enthusiasm, optimism, and empathy foster a supportive and motivated work environment. Conversely, leaders who display negative emotions create a toxic atmosphere, leading to decreased engagement and productivity. Growing research in leadership neuroscience has confirmed that chronic stress affects memory, creativity, collaboration, judgment, and decision-making. The World Health Organization estimates that anxiety and depression alone cost the global economy one trillion dollars in lost productivity annually. When those conditions are being generated or amplified by the leader at the front of the room, the cost is not abstract. It is the meeting that ends in silence. The feedback that never gets given. The innovation that never gets proposed because the room did not feel safe enough to take the risk. In 2025, 56 percent of executives reported burnout symptoms, and a record 1,028 chief executive officers (CEOs) departed their roles, a 19 percent increase from the prior year, driven substantially by physiological depletion. These are not statistics about people who needed better time management. These are statistics about nervous systems that were never tended to, passing their dysregulation down through every layer of the organization until there was nothing left to lead. Why “Grow the Me” begins in the body At Love Before ALL, our approach moves through three tiers of transformation: Grow the Me, Grow the We, and Grow the Collective. This sequence is not a philosophical preference; it is a physiological necessity. The Me is the starting point because no leader can extend safety, hold space for another person’s reality, or repair a relational rupture from a nervous system that is in survival mode. Self-regulation is not a wellness luxury. It is the prerequisite for every leadership skill the organizational development industry has ever tried to teach. You cannot give what your body does not currently have access to. This is why growing research identifies nervous system regulation as a core leadership skill, not a personal extra. A leader’s ability to regulate their own emotional and physiological responses directly influences employee trust, engagement, and performance. When the leader is regulated, they function as what researchers call an emotional anchor, creating the neurobiological conditions under which teams can think clearly, collaborate genuinely, and take the kinds of interpersonal risks that real communication requires. The practice of Grow the Me at the somatic level includes learning to recognize the body’s early stress signals before they escalate into reactive behavior. It includes building the pause that allows the prefrontal cortex to come back online before a response is given. It includes tending to the nervous system through intentional rest, relational repair, and the honest acknowledgment that leaders are not machines and were never designed to operate like them. That personal regulation then creates the conditions for Grow the We, the relational tier of the Love Before ALL (LBA) Approach. Co-regulation is not a technique. It is what happens when one regulated nervous system enters a room and makes it physiologically safer for every other nervous system present. The We is what becomes possible when enough people in an organization have done the Me work: teams that can hold genuine tension without fracturing, give feedback without triggering shutdown, and repair relational harm without pretending it never happened. From that foundation, the Collective becomes possible: an organizational culture that has designed its systems, meeting structures, conflict protocols, and performance practices around the reality of what human beings actually need to do their best work. Not compliance. Not performance. Genuine relational health, built into the operating architecture of how the organization functions every day within the systems and communities in which it exists. The reimagining prompt What if the most effective leadership tool is not a new management framework but the radical practice of learning to regulate your own body so you can safely hold the realities of others? Sit with that question not just as an idea but as a physical experience. Notice what your body does when you consider that the problem you have been trying to solve strategically might actually be a somatic one. Here is what Love Before ALL believes that practice could look like in your organization. Imagine a leadership culture where regulation is treated as a professional responsibility, not a personal hobby. Where leaders are supported in building the physiological capacity to stay grounded under pressure, not because they are required to perform calm, but because they understand that their nervous system is the first environment their team inhabits every day. Where communication workshops are preceded by embodied safety practices rather than replaced by them because the organization has learned that no script survives contact with a dysregulated body. Imagine a meeting culture designed around the reality that human beings need to feel safe before they can think clearly, contribute honestly, or receive feedback without defensiveness. Where the first minutes of a gathering are used not for logistics but for the kind of relational attunement that tells every nervous system in the room: you are safe here, your presence is welcome, and your full humanity is not a liability. Imagine a leader who has stopped outsourcing their own regulation to productivity hacks, caffeine, and the adrenaline of urgency and has instead learned to work with the biology they actually have, honoring its need for rest, connection, and honest acknowledgment of when the tank is empty. That leader changes every room they walk into. Not because they perform confidence. Because they have earned a regulated presence through the actual hard work of tending to themselves. That is the Grow the Me work. And it is the beginning of everything else. An invitation to begin with the body If you are a leader who has invested in communication training and watched the results dissolve under the pressure of a difficult week, this article is not an indictment of your strategy. It is an invitation to go one layer deeper. The organizational culture you are trying to build cannot be scripted. It has to be regulated into existence, one nervous system at a time, starting with yours. Use the LBA Leadership Soil Check to actively explore your individual somatic experience. Love Before ALL exists to help leaders and organizations build exactly that kind of somatic and relational foundation, from the inside out, beginning with the body. There are two ways to take the next step with us: Join the LBA Connection Circle Our free, 45-minute monthly session is a curated space where leaders are invited to arrive as they are, without performance, without an agenda, and without the pressure to have the answers. It is a room designed to help your nervous system remember what safety feels like. Reserve your spot! Join the LBA Movement Subscribe to the LBA Care and Clarity Update, our monthly resource for leaders navigating the intersection of personal well-being and organizational impact. Each issue includes a somatic reflection tied to our monthly theme, a conversation from the Talk to Me: Conversations on Relationship Power podcast, and practical regulation practices you can bring into your leadership the same week. Subscribe here. Because the most revolutionary leadership practice available right now is not a new framework. It is the quiet, courageous act of learning to feel safe in your own body so that others can feel safe in your presence. That is where the real work begins. Join the movement Connect with Love Before ALL: Annie's LinkedIn | YouTube Channel | LBA Blog | Talk to Me Podcast Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Annie Paraison Annie Paraison, Founder of Love Before ALL LLC Annie Paraison is the visionary behind Love Before ALL, a consultancy optimizing wellness through the power of relationships. A proud Haitian-born leader, she journeyed from New York City to Vanderbilt University, igniting a passion for harnessing human potential and building "Beloved Community." With over 17 years of leadership experience and an Executive MBA, she challenges the status quo by proving that love is a rigorous life and business strategy. She ensures no leader has to choose between impact and well-being by supporting the transformation of unconscious patterns into conscious compassion. Grounded in faith and guided by hope, Annie is committed to a world where personal and collective success are inextricably linked. References: BetterWithOli, “The Biggest Communication Training Mistakes Companies Make (and What to Do Instead),” November 2025. Stephen W. Porges, “Polyvagal Theory: A Science of Safety,” Frontiers in Integrative Neuroscience, 2022. Leadership Circle, “Leading with the Nervous System: The Power of Polyvagal Theory,” March 2025. TruworthWellness, “Secondhand Stress: How Anxiety Spreads in Teams,” September 2025. Hernandez Grande et al., “Catching On: Work Stress, Employee Wellbeing, and the Moderating Role of Team-Level Emotional Contagion,” Journal of Management & Organization, Volume 31, Issue 1, January 2025. DILAN Consulting, “The Contagious Leader: How Your Emotions Affect Your Team’s Success,” citing Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence, 1995. TradeFlock Asia, “Why Leaders Must Prioritise Nervous System Regulation,” citing World Health Organization data and Deloitte Women @ Work 2025, August 2026. SoliVana Wellness Lab, “Nervous System Reset: A Physiological Guide for High-Performing Professionals,” citing 2025 chief executive officer departure data, May 2026. Psychology Today, “Is Your Stress Impacting Your Leadership?”, December 2025. Workplace Peace Institute, “Leading with the Nervous System in Mind: How Polyvagal Theory Can Shape a Trauma-Informed Workplace,” August 2025.

Written by Christina Carras, Leadership Coach Christina Carras is an ICF-accredited leadership coach based in Brisbane. She specialises in guiding leaders with compassion, collaboration, and practical experience. With 30 years of experience in senior management, she helps both emerging and established leaders build confidence, develop people skills, and gain clarity on their leadership journey. I was wandering through the narrow streets of a small village in Sicily, which I've now visited for three consecutive years, when someone called my name. “Christina!” I turned around, and there was a familiar face from a previous visit. What struck me wasn't simply that they remembered me. I remembered them too. I remembered their names, where they worked, their families, the conversations we'd had and the little details that connected one visit to the next. It made me think about how powerful it is to be remembered and how equally powerful it is to remember. Because names are never just names. They are recognition. They are respect. They are connection. It took me back to a very simple habit I had throughout my corporate career. Friday afternoon rounds On Friday afternoons, I often walked around the office and said hello to our people. I'd ask how their week had been and, often, what they were doing over the weekend. I heard everything. Family gatherings. Birthday celebrations. Sporting events. Dinner with friends. Children's activities. Trips away. Sometimes difficult personal circumstances. Sometimes something as simple as plans to stay home and relax. I wasn't conducting a leadership exercise. I was simply interested in people. But occasionally, those little conversations came back to me. I particularly remember one Monday morning when I saw a staff member I'd spoken to the previous Friday. I asked her, “How was your father's 80th?” She looked at me, completely gobsmacked. I could see the surprise on her face. Not only had I remembered that her father was turning 80, but I'd actually remembered enough to ask her about it. Her reaction was priceless. I remember it to this day. It reminded me that what might feel like a small thing to one person can mean something quite different to another. For her, I had remembered something personal that mattered to her. For me, it had simply been part of a conversation. But that moment taught me something about leadership that has stayed with me ever since, "People notice when you remember. They notice when you listen. They notice when you follow up. Most importantly, they notice when you genuinely care." Leadership is remembered in moments, not milestones When we think about leadership legacy, we often think about major achievements, successful projects, promotions or organisational transformation. Those things matter. But ask people to describe the best leader they've ever worked with, and something interesting happens. They rarely begin with a strategy. They begin with a moment. “She always stopped to ask how I was going.” “He remembered my children's names.” “She listened when everyone else was talking.” “He believed in me before I believed in myself.” Leadership leaves fingerprints in everyday interactions. It's built in hundreds of seemingly ordinary moments that add up to something extraordinary: trust. Throughout my career, I've worked in governance, finance, compliance, executive leadership and organisational transformation. I've sat in boardrooms and executive meetings where decisions affected thousands of people. Yet the moments people still talk about aren't usually those decisions. They're the conversations. The encouragement. The welcome. The feeling they had when they walked away. That's the leadership people remember. Over the years, this moment took many forms: a name remembered, a conversation followed up, a personal milestone acknowledged. None were grand gestures. But together, they taught me that connection is built through attention. A lesson I learned in a lift Many years ago, during a significant organisational merger, I noticed something every morning as people entered the lift. The atmosphere was quiet. People avoided eye contact. Heads were down. Everyone was adjusting to uncertainty, wondering what the changes meant for them. So, I decided to do something incredibly simple. I started saying good morning. Not just a polite greeting. I made a point of learning people's names and using them. “Good morning, Sarah.” “Morning, Michael.” “How was your weekend, Priya?” At first, some people seemed surprised. Then they smiled. Weeks later, people began greeting one another before I entered the lift. The mood shifted. Conversations started. The lift became a place of connection, not silence. It wasn't a leadership initiative. It wasn't part of a communication strategy. It was simply recognising people. That experience reinforced something I've carried throughout my career, "Culture often changes one interaction at a time." Why remembering names matters so much Growing up, my father taught me the importance of remembering people's names. He believed it was one of the greatest signs of respect you could offer another person. As a child, I didn't fully understand why it mattered so much. As a leader, I understood completely. A person's name is deeply personal. Hearing it tells us we've been noticed. Remembering it tells us we were worth remembering. In coaching today, I often talk about belonging before performance. People contribute more confidently when they feel seen. Remembering someone's name is one of the simplest ways to communicate exactly that. It's not about having a remarkable memory. It's about paying remarkable attention. Recognition creates belonging One theme I've explored in previous articles is that leadership is felt, not announced. This is what that looks like in practice. Recognition isn't always public praise or formal awards. Often, it's much quieter. It's acknowledging someone's contribution in a meeting, following up after a difficult conversation, checking in after a presentation and thanking someone whose work often goes unnoticed. Recognition tells people, “I see you.” Belonging tells people, “You matter here.” The best leaders create both. Sometimes, the impact lasts. Another moment from my corporate years comes to mind. I once supported a leader who was capable, ambitious and growing into his potential. I encouraged him, challenged him and, perhaps most importantly, empowered him to believe in what he could contribute. Years later, he had become a C-suite executive. I would never claim that I had anything to do with his career path. His abilities, choices, hard work and capability were entirely his own. But he once told me something that stayed with me. He had told people who had been part of my team that the “world would be their oyster.” I was both humbled and deeply touched. Because sometimes, as leaders, we don't realise the impact of the words we use or the belief we place in someone. We may think we are simply encouraging someone, giving them confidence, or reminding them of their potential. But they may carry those words with them for years. That, to me, is the quiet power of leadership. We don't always get to see the impact we have. Sometimes, the greatest evidence comes much later, when someone tells you that something you said, did or believed about them stayed with them. Perhaps that is what leadership legacy really means: not what we achieve for people, but what we help people believe is possible for themselves. The leadership we remember makes people feel safe Listening. Presence. Voice. These have been recurring themes in my writing because they all contribute to psychological safety. People remember leaders who made it safe to ask questions. Safe to admit mistakes. Safe to contribute ideas. Safe to disagree respectfully. In coaching emerging and mid-level leaders, I often see talented people hesitate to speak because they're worried they don't have all the answers. The leaders who make the greatest difference create rooms where everyone's voice is welcome. That's a legacy worth leaving. 5 everyday behaviours memorable leaders practise Memorable leadership doesn't require extraordinary charisma. It requires attention and intention. Remember people's names. It is one of the simplest ways to show someone they matter. Be present. Put the phone away, make eye contact and genuinely listen. Do what you say you'll do. Consistency builds trust. Notice the contribution. Acknowledge effort, not just outcomes. Be consistent when things get difficult. People often remember how you showed up when circumstances weren't easy. Legacy isn't built at the end of a career One privilege of retiring from a long corporate career and becoming a leadership coach has been reflecting on what truly lasts. It's not the position. It's not the office. It's not the title on a business card. It's the people whose lives intersected with yours. Some of the most meaningful conversations I've had since retiring have been with former colleagues who don't remember a project we delivered together. They remember a conversation in my office. A moment of encouragement. A difficult day when someone listened. A belief that someone had in them before they had it in themselves. Those memories reminded me that leadership legacy isn't something we build after thirty years. We build it today. One conversation. One greeting. One remembered name. One act of respect at a time. A question every leader should ask As I walked through that Sicilian village, I realised something beautiful. The joy wasn't simply that people remembered me. The joy was remembering them. Connection is reciprocal. Leadership is too. So, here's the question I'd leave every leader with, "When people remember you as a leader, what will they remember feeling?" Because long after strategies are replaced, meetings are forgotten, and organisational charts change, people carry the emotional memory of how they experienced our leadership. Perhaps that's the legacy that matters most. Leadership begins when people feel seen, heard and valued. The leaders we remember aren't remembered because they demanded attention; they're remembered because they gave it. As Maya Angelou famously said, “People will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Follow me on LinkedIn for more info! Read more from Christina Carras Christina Carras, Leadership Coach With more than thirty years of leadership experience, Christina Carras is committed to helping individuals find the confidence to express their own voice. As a leadership coach, she collaborates with professionals to enhance self-belief, clarity, and authentic influence. Christina believes leadership is not defined by one's position but by service, courage, and the desire to uplift others. Her work centres on unlocking potential and cultivating leaders who inspire trust, foster growth, and drive positive change.

Written by Constanze Zientek, Women‘s Coach Constanze Zientek is a women's coach who works with highly sensitive women in their thirties, helping them to cultivate inner strength, embrace embodied leadership, and build an authentic, aligned life. Her approach blends emotional depth, clarity, and self-trust. Do you often find yourself overwhelmed by problems, worrying about your future or about events that you know you have very little to no influence over? If you do, you are not an exception. In fact, you are experiencing a fundamental part of the human experience. We all go through phases in which insecurities and worries are a big part of the picture, and in many parts of life, they can become permanent. While it’s unlikely that worrying can be completely defeated, one thing makes navigating real problems, fear, and doubt much easier: the practice of realistic optimism. Of course, what else, you may think. But practicing optimism in everyday situations can truly be challenging. It gets even harder to stick to it when things start feeling really heavy or when problems arise that just don’t seem to be solvable. That’s why this article dives into different aspects of optimism, as well as the question of how to actually practice it when things feel tight. 1. The nature of optimism What is optimism The very first thing we are going to take a look at is the nature of optimism. Researchers can use the term “optimism” differently in their individual fields. One way to measure optimism is the Life Orientation Test Revised (LOT-R) by Michael Scheier and Charles Carver. According to this psychological measurement, optimism is defined as dispositional optimism: a stable, generalized personality trait reflecting the steady expectation that good things will happen in the future, even when a person faces obstacles or adversity. Realistic optimism is not the belief that everything is always well. It is the belief that, whatever happens, something positive, desirable, hopeful, and meaningful can come out of a situation. It contains the belief that current conditions will likely work out for the better in the future, even though the how may not be visible yet. According to Michael Scheier and Charles Carver, optimism is a scientific disposition rather than just positive thinking. But through introspection and practice, it can be built up or deepened. About the benefits of realistic optimism Research has shown that people who display a larger amount of realistic optimism tend to experience a better quality of life in multiple areas. Being optimistic tends to improve physical health and the quality of a person’s immune system, as well as psychological health and well-being. Higher levels of optimism often coincide with lower rates of depression and anxiety. Optimism can also improve relationships between people, since optimism can lead to being more oriented toward the success of a relationship and therefore more likely to show the willingness to communicate and respect one’s own needs, as well as those of the other person. Overall, there seems to be a frequent connection between optimism and a person’s personal success, as they may not take failure as severely and are therefore able to approach a goal from different perspectives. Common blocks of optimism Cynicism often opposes optimism with the argument that it is dangerous, irresponsible, and inauthentic to assume the best. There are countless reasons why these ways of thinking are deeply established. Some very common ones are, for instance: Referring to previous moments of failure or hardship: If a person has evidence that certain events have not turned out well in the past, chances are high that they will expect the same outcome the next time as well. Just like that, a worry spiral arises. The “not me” narrative: Even people who see the possibility of things going well for others can get into the trap of assuming negativity by saying, “Yes, good things happen, but to other people, not to me.” This standpoint then opens another spiral, as the brain starts looking for evidence that this is actually true. Assuming the worst to avoid disappointment: Many times, it seems easiest to just assume the worst in a circumstance to protect oneself from disappointment: “If I don’t get my hopes up, I won’t be disappointed.” Well, the thing is, the person will most likely be disappointed, no matter how hard they try not to get their hopes up. It’s not natural for us to repress our own desires on an emotional level if we really want something. Trying to repress the desire can actually double the suffering. The need to feel responsible: Getting in the car, fastening your seatbelt, and driving cautiously while assuming that you will most likely arrive safely is an example of calculating a risk, taking reasonable precautions, and therefore reducing the likelihood of injury. However, if one’s fear of getting hurt leads to them not getting in the car at all, it can have a very negative impact on their life. Discernment is key in judging what is actually a reasonable risk calculation and what is not. Loyalty to a group: Both of the points indicated above already show how hard it can be to change thoughts and habits that are directed toward expecting negativity. Another factor that can perpetuate negative assumptions is collective behaviors and opinions. No matter if it is family, a friend circle, or the workplace where a collective negative thought is formed, group loyalties can make it increasingly harder to question and counteract it. It can feel ridiculous or like personal betrayal to show up with a different outlook on things, let alone to demonstrate changed behavior that might go against the common way of thinking and acting within a group. Finding it impossible to be optimistic when looking at the current situation of the world: With wars, killings, climate change, and so many tragedies circulating in the news all around the globe, one can say that it is pretty hard to be optimistic nowadays. Sadly, countless tragedies are happening in the world. In fact, wherever we feel like we can contribute and make a difference to help solve any of these problems, it is important that we do so. On the other hand, getting stuck in worrying over problems can actually lead to a blockage of mental and physical energy, and as a consequence, the energy that could otherwise be used for solving problems becomes trapped. This can quickly turn into exhaustion without making any meaningful changes on the outside. While it can seem very understandable at first glance to assume the worst, it has a big downside: It will undoubtedly prepare the brain to look out for evidence of just that. As if that was not problematic enough, it can also have a ripple effect on other areas of life. Once the brain prepares to “detect the environment for potential problems,” it will most likely find situations containing that potential, create more worries, and as a consequence, deepen the spiral further. Realistic optimism can hold two truths at once Of course, one could say that untamed optimism would toxically bypass pain or hardship. That is, in fact, true if optimism is used as a way to pass over evident issues or feelings. Telling a person, “Just be fine,” “Just get over it,” or “All is well” can actually be an attempted manipulation and potentially damage their emotional sphere. It can also negatively impact relationships and cause trust issues regarding the ability of the other person to truly understand one’s needs and perceptions (“Do they even understand how I feel?”). However, optimism is not a one-dimensional principle. There is a more profound and sustainable way to use it. While toxic positivity denies what can be very real, realistic optimism can hold two truths at once. Realistic optimism can say, “This is really bad, and yet I’m convinced that there’s a better way forward. I’m working on it.” The how doesn’t have to be clear just yet. But the mere possibility has to be acknowledged: that the way to something better actually exists. Optimism is a practice Optimism is not something that you can just decide to have if it has never had a lot of room in your life before. It is a practice. Sometimes that practice is lifelong. But training the muscle is highly rewarding. Because to receive great things, to see possibilities, and to acknowledge something good as such, and not simply as “beginner’s luck” or “let’s wait and see if this is too good to be true,” we have to prepare ourselves for them. Yes, in order for us to become more optimistic, we need to practice a basic level of optimism in the first place. We need to practice on a daily basis to open ourselves up to the possibility of good things happening to us, without the inner critic showing up and ruining the momentum. 2. Optimism denies fear the chance to write the story The first reason to practice more optimism is that it refuses to let fear write the ending of a story. The question is literally, “What do you make it mean that something happened?” When something unforeseen happens, fear is quick to take its place alongside uncertainty. Optimism often feels very much out of the picture or at least out of place. But the truth is that, in the end, the meaning of an experience is up to you. Not up to your surroundings, not up to society. It is up to you. Inviting optimism into the picture has multiple benefits. Fear presents itself as realism Fear is a vicious feeling. It’s like a very disturbing neighbor that tends to do something good for the community every once in a while, while for the rest of the time, it really disturbs everyone around it. Fear can also do good when it warns of real danger. But many times, fear ruins good experiences just for the sake of being present. What seems to be realism in the first place is, in fact, nothing more than an act of protection against growth into unknown places. Fear often presents itself as realism as a form of protection from disappointment, but falsely so. More often than not, it manipulates people out of growing into bigger and better versions of themselves rather than protecting them from real danger. So it is up to us to determine the moments in which fear is actually helpful in becoming aware of a circumstance. It is equally important to determine the moments when it is necessary to build so much inner authority that we don’t permit fear to manipulate us out of our growth and away from our most authentic path. Optimism can favor uncertainty Since fear operates as a hidden brake in our psyche, it also puts uncertainty in a bad light. It makes not knowing what is going to happen seem irresponsible. Without a detailed plan, it can seem just too risky to approach anything. While it is true that planning, structures, and systems create security, it is also true that none of them will ever be able to fully get rid of uncertainty. Have you ever experienced a situation where you have tried to plan for every eventual outcome, only to have a mere infinity of unforeseen challenges come up? If yes, you know what I am talking about. I’m not saying that the solution is to leave things up to chance. That would, in fact, be pretty irresponsible. But what is often overlooked is that, no matter how good the plan is, uncertainty won’t ever fully disappear. On the other hand, uncertainty is also the very thing that leaves room for creative solutions to come in. It leaves space for things to be created in a better way than a human mind could initially even plan for. Trusting in the creative potential of uncertainty instead of fighting it requires optimism. Together, they can create the space for unexpected, pleasant developments rather than blocking them through the fear of uncertainty. Optimism contains possibility So, if an event only has the meaning that you assign to it, that means that realistic optimism simply refuses to take a situation as a dooming verdict. It is the conviction that even if an event feels hurtful and potentially traumatizing, it holds the potential of becoming the ground that something good can be built on. That’s where the tricky part begins: gathering enough determination and inner authority to perceive this as a real possibility. Optimism and inner authority work closely hand in hand, as it is actually inner authority that does not allow an outside circumstance to determine your outlook on things. Inner authority gives that permission only to yourself. 3. Optimism challenges anxiety culture Optimism is the biggest opponent of mainstream media’s and society’s perception of reality. This is not surprising if you take a look at the news and countless undoubtedly terrifying happenings in today’s world. Also, it is pretty basic knowledge that our survival as humans has always depended on our nervous systems detecting threats in order to ensure our survival as a species. Fear constantly competes for your attention Whenever fear comes up, it brings up a notable reaction in the body. Fear is most of the time not a subtle emotion, as it has an alarming function. It tells our bodies to fight, run, freeze, or fawn in response to danger. Since our species never used to be, and sometimes still isn’t, free of danger for our survival, fear becomes loud, with only one goal: to secure our survival. Fear is much louder than optimism. Many times, optimism seems to be an almost reckless endeavor in the face of survival. So, it is no wonder that optimism is often pushed aside. Cynicism is often mistaken for intelligence Since positivity doesn’t seem to ensure our survival, cynicism can seem like a sign of intelligence at first. Ultimately, so many brilliant philosophers and writers have become known for being deeply cynical, framing the human experience as often deeply disturbing for the soul and doomed by suffering. Optimism, on the other hand, seems to be something that finds its place first and foremost in some childhood cartoon series. Comparing the cynicism of deep-thinking minds throughout humanity’s history, from the ancient world onward, to shallow children’s entertainment, it is no wonder that happy content often gets a bad reputation for being unintelligent. As intelligent adults, we can have a hard time allowing ourselves to enjoy the superficiality of happy content. But what if children’s programs contain truths about the approach to life itself that we have already started to forget? Cynicism creates paralysis As already described, cynicism is often perceived as intelligence in the eyes of society. What is not discussed enough, instead, is how inviting more doom and gloom into a situation often builds up to a state of paralysis. Suddenly, the problem is not being discussed in order to find a solution, but in order to vent about the problem itself. Just like that, a single problem starts being followed by a multitude of more problems with potentially horrific consequences, without any solutions in sight, neither for the first problem nor for the following ones. 4. Optimism protects your ability to act Realistic optimism interrupts the spiral indicated above by putting things into perspective. It pulls one’s thoughts back into the here and now and enables a focus on finding practical solutions. It also serves to put problems into their place. Some situations are just very dark indeed. But other times, a problem is not a real problem, but a healthy challenge. Optimism asks, “How dark does this really have to get until it is solved?” and by doing so, actually helps the brain interrupt the negative emotion that is fueling the problem and instead puts the focus on finding possible solutions. Protecting your inner world is an act of defiance Many of us move through life feeling like we are targeted by circumstances without being aware of the power we actually hold over them. Protecting your inner world through the practice of optimism is actually so much more than “just thinking better thoughts.” It is an act of defiance toward life experiences and outside influences that make you feel like it is natural to live in a constant state of alert. It means upholding the authority to act and react to circumstances instead of getting stuck as their target. It means bringing movement where others stand still and co-creating circumstances instead of just letting things happen to you. By doing so, we don’t only become a bigger fountain of strength in our own lives, but also in the lives of those around us. Optimism is a sign of inner authority Many of us move through life feeling like we are targeted by circumstances. We are not aware of the authority we actually hold over them. Just in gathering the willingness to practice more optimism in spite of visible challenges and problems lies an inner authority that can extend itself over all parts of one’s life. Even if you never felt like you had a say in any part of your life, this inner part will always be available for you to command. This inner authority can bring solutions that were not visible before, and sometimes, it bends circumstances that seemed unbending in the first place. Optimism fuels activity Since optimism restores inner authority, it fuels physical and psychological power. After all, it is a lot easier to work for something if you actually see a purpose in the reason you are doing it. That purpose can come through optimism that is based on authority. It says, “I am doing this because I have decided that this is contributing to a higher purpose.” About the role of trust and detachment Now, let’s take a look at the pretty logical thought of what happens if you are truly committed to a goal or a cause that you are not sure will ever fulfill itself. This is where it gets interesting. Let’s say you are studying to become an astronaut, but that never happens. Or you are contributing to a humanitarian cause, and no matter how much work you put in, there will always be more work to do, more problems to solve, and more suffering to face. That’s when trust becomes mandatory. Your human efforts do indeed have limits. Optimism is not only useful for reaching a goal, but it is also the basis for the road you are taking toward a destination you don’t know. The destination can be up to chance, luck, or even faith, but real optimism requires trust and a certain detachment from the outcome. Some outcomes are simply determined by one of the factors above. Sometimes, it requires trust that the road will somehow make sense in hindsight. Sometimes, you simply need to acknowledge the possibility that the road might carry you to a far better destination than the one you originally had in mind. Follow me on Instagram for more info! Read more from Constanze Zientek Constanze Zientek, Women‘s Coach Constanze Zientek is a women's coach working with highly sensitive women in their thirties. She supports them in cultivating inner strength, embodied leadership, and an authentic, aligned life. Her approach blends emotional depth, clarity, and self-trust. She furthermore practices as a lawyer with over ten years of work experience, specializing in inheritance law. Her work with clients in emotionally complex transitions, combined with her own journey through her thirties, led her to coaching. Today, she integrates structure and intuition to offer clear, deeply human guidance.

Written by Nicci Lee, Founder of Lovingly Guided Nicci is the founder of Lovingly Guided, where she helps women overcome limiting beliefs, build confidence, and step back into their power through mindset and personal growth. Drawing on her own healing journey, she combines mind, emotion, and energy work to help women build self-trust and create a life rooted in authenticity. What if the thing you’re most afraid of hearing could become the thing that changes your life? Do you ever hold yourself back from pursuing something you want to do because you’re scared? Maybe it is the fear of failure, the fear of rejection, or simply the belief that you aren’t good enough or worthy of the opportunity you want. Whatever the reason, many of us have experienced that moment when we want to take a chance on ourselves, but our minds convince us that it is safer not to try. We end up rejecting ourselves before anyone else ever gets the chance to. But what if we changed the way we looked at rejection? What if, instead of running from the possibility of hearing “no,” we started chasing it? Changing your mindset around rejection Six months ago, I came across a woman’s reel about a rejection challenge she was doing. Her goal was to collect 1,000 no's. My immediate thought was, “That’s a great idea. I’m going to do that.” It might sound strange to intentionally seek out rejection. After all, most of us spend our lives doing the exact opposite. We try to avoid embarrassment, failure, disappointment, and the uncomfortable feeling that comes with someone telling us no. But what if we flipped the script and stopped seeing rejection as something negative? When you start chasing no's, a rejection becomes progress. Every no is one more step toward your goal. Instead of feeling defeated when someone turns you down, you can become excited because that no gets you one step closer to reaching your target. The more you do it, the more comfortable you become with the possibility of rejection. I believe this is where the challenge becomes so powerful. You are not necessarily trying to make rejection feel good. You are teaching yourself that rejection isn’t something you have to fear or avoid. Why are we so afraid of rejection? Our brains naturally try to protect us from things that feel unfamiliar or potentially threatening. When we are about to step outside of our comfort zone, that protective response can show up as fear, doubt, overthinking, and hesitation. Instead of moving forward, our minds begin looking for all the reasons we shouldn’t. This is where so many of us get stuck. We think about taking action, but then the questions start. What if they say no? What if I embarrass myself? What if I’m not good enough? What if I fail? Before we know it, we have talked ourselves out of trying. The problem is that we can mistake the possibility of rejection for proof that we shouldn’t pursue something. We convince ourselves that because there is a chance we could hear “no,” it is better not to ask at all. A rejection challenge forces you to approach that fear differently. Instead of avoiding the unknown, you intentionally step toward it. Instead of allowing your mind to tell you, “Don’t do it,” you begin telling yourself, “Let’s see what happens.” Sometimes what happens is a yes. What happened when I started chasing no's I’ve been chasing no's for six months now, and during that time, I have grown in ways I never expected. Some pretty amazing things have happened along the way. I made it all the way to the semifinals of a modeling competition, even though I had never modeled before and I’m in my 30s. I entered two speaking competitions, and both times I made it into the top 100 out of approximately 7,000 applicants. I also received my first callback for a commercial. The funny part is that when I applied for many of these opportunities, I fully expected to get rejected. I started getting creative with the things I applied for because I thought, “There’s no way they’re going to pick me. This is definitely going to be a no.” I figured, if I already expected the answer to be no, why not try? That mindset completely changed what I was willing to pursue. I stopped deciding for other people that I wasn’t qualified, talented, experienced, or worthy enough before they even had the opportunity to make that decision themselves. I started giving other people the chance to tell me no instead of making that decision for them. To my surprise, some of those no's turned into yeses. So many, in fact, that I’ve had to slow down on applying for new opportunities until my schedule frees up. Six months ago, I never would have imagined that would be my problem. The confidence that comes from trying One of the biggest changes I’ve noticed throughout this challenge isn’t necessarily the number of yeses I’ve received. It is the confidence I’ve developed simply by being willing to try. Every application, audition, competition, and opportunity has taught me something about myself and about what is possible when I stop allowing fear to make my decisions for me. I’ve also realized how much fun it can be to try something new when you aren’t completely attached to the outcome. Instead of thinking, “I must get this,” I’ve started thinking, “Let’s see what happens.” That small shift has changed everything. I get to learn something new, meet new people, challenge myself, and discover what I’m capable of. When I do get a yes, it feels even more meaningful because I know I was willing to go after it when I thought the answer would be no. Every yes has become another piece of evidence that I am capable of more than I originally believed. But even the no's have become valuable. They don’t carry the same weight they used to. Instead of seeing rejection as a statement about my worth, I can see it as one experience, one opportunity, or simply one person’s answer. The psychology behind rejection challenges While researching rejection challenges, I discovered that this practice is also sometimes referred to as “rejection therapy.” The concept is associated with Canadian entrepreneur Jason Comely, who created a rejection therapy card game in 2010 designed to encourage people to intentionally experience rejection rather than avoid it. The basic idea is to make rejection a normal part of life instead of something we constantly try to escape. The science behind this idea is less about literally rewiring your brain every time someone tells you no and more about what can happen when we repeatedly face something uncomfortable and learn that we can handle it. With repeated experiences, our expectations and responses to those situations can change. Something that once felt extremely threatening can begin to feel much more manageable. That has certainly been part of my experience. The more no's I collect, the less threatening they feel. I have learned that hearing “no” doesn’t mean I failed, and it certainly doesn’t mean I’m not good enough. It simply means the answer was no for that opportunity. Once you learn that you can handle rejection, something interesting happens. You become more willing to take chances because the possibility of hearing “no” no longer feels like a reason to stay where you are. Stop rejecting yourself Think about something you’ve been wanting to do but haven’t pursued because you’re afraid of rejection. Maybe it’s applying for a job you don’t think you’ll get, submitting your work somewhere, asking someone for an opportunity, entering a competition, starting a business, speaking on a stage, asking for the sale, or simply putting yourself out there in a way that feels uncomfortable. Now ask yourself: Am I being rejected, or am I rejecting myself before I ever give someone else the opportunity to decide? That question has changed the way I approach opportunities. I don’t get to control whether someone else says yes, but I do get to control whether I ask. I get to control whether I apply. I get to control whether I try. I get to decide whether someone else’s no becomes a reason to stop or simply another number on my way to the next opportunity. What if you started chasing no's? Six months into my own rejection challenge, I’ve received far more yeses than I ever expected. But the biggest thing this challenge has given me isn’t the opportunities. It’s the willingness to pursue them. I’ve learned to stop letting the fear of rejection decide what I’m capable of. I’ve learned that I don’t have to know whether something will work out before I try. I’ve learned that I can be uncomfortable and still take action. So maybe there is something you’ve been holding yourself back from. Maybe you’ve been waiting until you’re more qualified, more confident, more experienced, or more ready. Maybe you’ve been waiting for the fear to go away before you take the first step. What if you stopped waiting? What if you went after the opportunity knowing there is a possibility you’ll hear “no”? What if, instead of being afraid of that no, you started counting it? Because every no means you tried. Every no means you were willing to put yourself out there. Every time you try, you allow yourself to discover something you never would have known if you had stayed safely inside your comfort zone. Six months ago, I started chasing no's because I thought it would be an interesting challenge. I didn’t realize that along the way, I would become someone who was no longer as afraid of hearing them. Maybe that’s the real power of chasing rejection. It isn’t about collecting no's. It’s about becoming the person who is willing to ask anyway. Sometimes when you stop rejecting yourself first, you might be surprised by how many yeses are waiting on the other side. Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Nicci Lee Nicci Lee, Founder of Lovingly Guided Nicci is the founder of Lovingly Guided. She helps women overcome limiting beliefs, build confidence, and trust themselves again. Drawing on her experience overcoming depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), as well as her business and coaching expertise, she combines mind, emotion, and energy work to create personalized coaching programs that empower women to step back into their power. She is also the author of Rewriting Life's Rules: How to Break Free from Society and the host of the Lovingly Guided podcast, where she shares personal breakthroughs and practical tools for shifting mindset and creating lasting change.

Written by Delia Brett, Coach, Teacher, Facilitator, & Dance Artist Delia Brett is a transformational coach, yoga teacher, and dancer with 35+ years of experience. Owner of Green Room Yoga and creator of East Van Wisdom School, she guides people to dissolve stuck patterns, reclaim their power, and awaken to deeper purpose and creativity. The body is more than a collection of parts or a machine to be understood through facts and figures. It is a living, responsive whole, constantly adapting to our experiences and the world around us. Through yoga, movement, breath, and mindful attention, we can move beyond what we know about the body and discover what it means to experience it from within. This shift invites us to listen more closely, deepen our awareness, and bring a greater sense of connection and presence into everyday life. The body is more than we can measure We've been trained to think of the body as a simple equation: calories in, calories out, an input-output device. Or, at best, as a sophisticated machine, with parts that plug into other parts and operate other parts. The truth is, while these frameworks are useful in some regards, they don't capture even a fraction of the body's miraculous complexity. The body, like all other life forms, is built from nature, from the force of life itself. It is constantly rebuilding, adapting, and responding. Cells are dying and being replaced. Tissues sense and respond to mechanical forces. The nervous system continually changes in response to experience, learning and environment. Even fascia, the connective tissue that runs throughout us, isn’t simply wrapping and holding things together. It is richly innervated, and the cells within it can sense mechanical forces and translate them into biochemical signals that influence how the tissue behaves. In other words, the body doesn't simply experience force; force is information to the living tissue. Then there is the physics of simply being alive on Earth. Every time we stand, walk, step, jump or land, we are in a conversation with gravity and the ground beneath us. The ground pushes back. Forces travel through the body as we move, and our cells and tissues are exquisitely responsive to them. What we call mechanical loading is part of this constant conversation between the living body and the world around it. So even at the level of cells, connective tissue, the nervous system and physics, the body isn't a machine made up of isolated parts. It is a dynamic, responsive, continuously adapting living whole, sensing, exchanging, reorganizing and responding. Information is not the experience Even that information, as astounding as it is, doesn't come close to what we can know through our own felt experience. Or let me put it this way, "Information is always about something. It describes the thing, but it is not the thing itself." Information doesn't heal us, restore us, or help us transform less-than-optimal ways of holding, moving, or living in our bodies. That's where we get it all wrong in the West. We prioritize information over the felt experience. But when we practice things like yoga or breathwork, when we sing or dance, or when we're simply hanging out with friends, laughing and socializing, we do wonders to bring the body into a more balanced, harmonious state of flow. These are the things, these are the experiences that we are skipping over when we consume information as though it were the source of our healing or transformation. There is an old Buddhist metaphor: the finger pointing at the moon. The finger is not the moon. It is simply pointing toward it. When we begin to treat information as the finger pointing at the moon, we can stop staring at the finger. We can go to the moon, to the feeling, to the body. From there, we can begin to amplify our capacity for healing, understanding, growth, and the full embodiment that we are ultimately hoping to have in this life, where we feel more ease, more connection, more comfort, and strength in our bodies. Because the way we feel in our bodies informs the way we show up in our lives. It gives us access to greater presence, capacity, energy, and resilience. Arriving at the moon I've spent decades hungry for information, hungry to understand the body's mysteries. What I've learned is that these practices, yoga, dance, voice, are, in fact, the most valuable ways that we can come to arrive at the moon. They bring us into the very experience we've been looking for. So how do we do that? It sounds complicated when you put it into words, but really, it’s very simple. We take what we know about the body and turn it into knowing through the body. That means moving beyond the technical language and into sensation, relationship, rhythm and response. Instead of simply understanding that the spine can move in certain ways, we begin to feel the spine moving. Instead of thinking about gravity as a force acting on us, we feel the ground beneath our feet and notice how it meets us, pushes back and sends support through the body. This is what I try to cultivate in my yoga classes. We move through poses, but the pose is never really the destination. We wave our spines through cat-cow. We lean over the left foot to float into Warrior One rather than simply coming into Warrior One and straightening our leg and lengthening our spine. That is not just an aesthetic sensibility. Or a decorative, feel-good kind of approach. It's actually a sophisticated understanding of how the body works: through a net, a weave of systems inside of systems, inside of systems, constantly processing and filtering, interacting with each other in an exchange, a flow. I teach this way so we can train our minds to stay present while moving through, stepping into, breathing into and expanding from, etc. These verbs become actions of being and bring us closer to the truth of our lived experience. In a yoga class, all of this is happening at once, the myofascial flow, the deep core line, the physics press of the feet, the bounce of the Earth back up through. We are moving, breathing, sensing, responding, taking in so much information through the body that we don't necessarily have time to stop and understand what is happening. We don't need to. The body is already doing it. But there is something powerful about slowing down enough to notice. To begin to recognize these underlying principles, not as information to memorize, but as something we can feel and eventually carry with us off the mat, into the way we walk, stand, breathe, move and meet the world. So we can begin to listen to the cues, the signals, the sharp pains, the discomfort, whatever it may be, and respond by fine-tuning the way we're sitting, standing, carrying ourselves and breathing. The practice of wholeness This is, to me, what yoga has always been about. Because yoga, in and of itself, is about everything. It's about joining. It's about yoking. It's about bringing together all that is. It's about dissolving any sense of separateness into a whole, full, unified state of being. No, we can't get there in a workshop. We can't get there in a single class, but I believe we can arrive there in a single moment, when we drop into feeling, when we drop into presence, and we allow the natural wonders of the mountain, the sky, the sea, the stars, the fractal formations of leaves bursting open in the sun, to reveal the same miraculous truth about our bodies, and about ourselves. Visit my website for more info! Read more from Delia Brett Delia Brett, Coach, Teacher, Facilitator, & Dance Artist Delia Brett is a transformational coach, embodiment teacher, and yoga instructor with over 23 years of experience. A veteran dance artist and choreographer, she co-directed the interdisciplinary company MACHiNENOiSY for 17 years, creating boundary-pushing productions with youth and adult performers. She is the founder of Art Full Well Coaching and the East Van Wisdom School, and the owner of Green Room Yoga in Vancouver, BC. Delia blends somatics, creativity, and consciousness to help people dissolve stuck patterns, reclaim their power, and reconnect with the wisdom of their bodies. Her work invites others to turn life’s challenges into gateways for growth, clarity, and spiritual awakening.

Written by Joseph C Pledger, Jr., EdS., Educational Specialist Joseph C. Pledger Jr., EdS, is an accomplished master of the storytelling adventure. Though shunned by world affairs dinner-table guests, it became his civic innovation that was sought and bought by justice reform. Thus, “The Microchip” appreciated the wrongfulness of his actions. A Microcomputer Systems Manager, AI Scholar, and Justice, Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion (JEDI) Developer. For Vegas Vance Whitmore’s BBQ and the ACE Pizza Party Connection, The Wizard of Domino's was there for the bang-bang shoot-'em-up at the Cedar Lee Building Corner Store #2142! In the Cedar Lee Building’s back parking lot, during the Summer of 1996, a 21-year-old female shift manager’s Toyota 4 Door Compact took a drive-by delivery of three donut-hole-sized shotgun blasts into its backside driver-side door, above its wheel well and rubber tire. As the first Crime Reporter on scene, “The Wizard of Domino's” started rolling his 8mm Sharp View Camera, recording and processing the holey donut trail of powdered shotgun shell evidence. News of the drive-by brought out a horrified Shift Manager named Lashawn W. Though she resided one block away on Cottage Grove Road, she drove herself in for labor management work. Yet while she seemed oblivious as to the identity of her tormentor, “Myrical Star” had framed herself as cheesecake, appearing for covers in Black Pleasure Magazine. But stardom had to project her into the video lineup. So, why was she resisting her charm? A Cartoon Sales Guy sent Lashawn W. a collection notice! She had to perform with “Coach Chris” in an All Star Cheerleader Search Audition taping. Yet Vegas Vance Whitmore and his twin brother stepped outside, observing the back parking lot, shrugging their shoulders and shaking their meatheads with bewilderment! Somebody knew Sumthin'. But they weren't telling “The Wiz” nuthin’. Here's for that “Sumthin' For Nothin' 1993 Summer Promotion!” When you called Domino's Pizza connection to the Akron Cleveland Enterprises Franchise, there was nobody home to answer. With his dream home under construction, Domino's Pizza Franchisee Kevin Williams mysteriously fell out of the race to the stoop. After Doing Business As “ACE” for exactly five years, he passed the final delivery on to his Angel in the Outfield. Kevin Williams was once former Detroit Tigers Owner Tom Monahan’s left-hand bodyguard and tossed his Domino's Pizza crust with his right hand. Through the years of 1993 through 1998, Domino's Pizza brand promoted “Making it Great!” while former ACE Employees, like white boy JD, promoted “Keeping Mouths Shut” after being seen and asked at Sea World of Ohio 1999 Summer Nights. Now then, Whitmore's BBQ Polish Boy Originals got hosed down last Spring. Mysteriously, Vegas Vance Whitmore's BBQ Lee Road, Harvard Avenue insurance policy dropped its coverage four days before the fire gutted the strip mall. Local news reports that his home mortgage coverage denied Whitmore's BBQ and the twins any compensation! Until their operation’s fire insurance claims are resolved, Cleveland Mount Pleasant’s Whitmore's BBQ is closed for goods sold. Ask the BBQ Whitmore brothers’ twin, “What Do You Want On Your Tombstone?!” (frozen pizza promotional offer). Rest in Pizza. Kevin Williams. Follow me on Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Joseph C Pledger Jr., EdS Joseph C Pledger, Jr., EdS., Educational Specialist Cited for his Strategic Expertise, "The Microchip" appears distinctly listed within the 76th edition of Albert Marquis' Who's Who in America for 2023. He trades business licenses with those who purchase and browse such periodicals and literature to pick his brain.

Written by Leonard Shen, Doctor of Chinese Energetic Medicine & Buddhist Lama Leonard Shen is a Doctor of Medical Qi Gong, Buddhist Lama, Christian mystical priest, Harvard-trained litigator, Fortune 100 corporate executive, and on the Board of homeless shelters and technology startups. Founder of California Qigong, he teaches Qi Gong online and uses sophisticated medical Qi Gong protocols to promote healing. This article is the second in a series published by Brainz Magazine, describing how Medical Qi Gong can be used to heal oneself and others using detailed protocols developed over the last 4,000 years in China and now recognized for use with patients of the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs (VA). The author using qi gong to connect to ancient energies October 3, 2026 In last month’s Brainz Magazine article, “Medical Qi Gong to Heal Yourself and Others,” we introduced the science of Medical Qi Gong (MQG). Developed in China to a high degree and practiced in Chinese hospitals using solely its energy healing techniques to cure diseases such as cancer, diabetes, and liver, lung, heart, brain, digestive, reproductive, skin, bone, and kidney diseases, MQG has recently been authorized by the VA for the treatment of millions of patients. This article, the second in a series delving into what MQG is and how it works, will focus on the role of patients in their own healing. What is Medical Qi Gong? An MQG practitioner uses gentle movement, breathing and visualization techniques, and meditative exercises to sense into the body and energy field, remove toxic energies and historical trauma, and infuse and balance positive life force energy. Whether practiced by individuals to heal themselves or by an MQG doctor to enhance the energy of a patient, the detailed protocols and prescriptions of MQG can strengthen the immune system, increase energy levels, promote calm and emotional resiliency, and increase kinesthetic awareness and connection to the environment. California Qi Gong students first sensing the energy of fellow students, then projecting their own energy toward their partners. How does disease arise? According to traditional Chinese medicine (TCM), we are generally born with open energy highways (acupuncture “meridians”) that ensure the smooth distribution and nurturing of life force energy (“chi”) throughout our system. But from the first time a parent shouts “Stop that!” to a 2-year-old, sending waves of negative energy into the clear field of the toddler, to the impact over the rest of their life from toxic relationships, car accidents, psychological stress, and abuse…the entire lifetime of exposure to negative energies disrupts and diverts the original unimpeded flow of energy in the body. Once an energy meridian is blocked by a clot of externally inflicted toxic energy, like a dam in a river, there ends up being too much energy in one part of the body and too little energy in another, and the body becomes a checkerboard of unbalanced energy. Once the energy pattern has been warped, biochemical and cellular behavior change, and over time even the physical tissue can shift and grow to follow that abnormal pattern. This can eventually lead to biological malfunctions, cysts, and even tumors. This is how TCM explains its belief that emotional trauma and exposure to or suppression of anger, rage, fear, grief, loneliness, sadness, and other emotions lie at the root of many illnesses, as the mind-body connection works over time to create the conditions leading to physical illness. How does MQG cure disease? To break up such accumulated clots and stagnations, MQG trains patients to make certain sounds and to vibrate the parts of the body where there may be blockages. In fact, TCM has held for centuries that certain emotional frequencies tend to be stored in certain organ systems. So, to clear those emotional histories, vibration of those organs is necessary. For example, the energies of anger, frustration, and rage tend to accumulate in the liver and eyes. TCM holds that long years of suppressed anger can lead to problems in those organs, including glaucoma and liver disease. A patient with those issues will be taught to make a descending-pitch, resonant sound, “Guooooo,” and seek to vibrate their liver area, then, with palms over that area, imagine ripples of released toxic energy pushing their hands away from the body and being released and dissipated. Suppressed anger can also be released through more vigorous exercises, including figuratively “beating the punching bag” by swinging the arms forcefully for several minutes to throw angry energy down certain acupuncture meridians, out the palms, and deep into the ground while loudly shouting “No!” California Qi Gong student sensing into their own body’s energy pattern. In parallel with the patient’s own “homework,” the MQG practitioner will sense into the patient’s body and associated energy field. The MQG practitioner will then remove excess energy and infuse positive chi where it is needed, rebalancing the energy field to a healthier state. The practitioner will also educate the patient on where to direct their homework exercises, focusing on this or that organ and deploying many different techniques of vibration, visualization, gentle movement, and meditation. California Qi Gong Dr. Eliza Meeker performing MQG on a patient. Does MQG work? In addition to centuries of use and refinement in China, the efficacy of MQG has begun to be recognized in the United States. In May 2026, Harvard Medical School hosted a conference titled “The Science of Tai Chi and Qigong as Whole Person Health,” where hundreds of physicians, academics, and practitioners from 65 countries shared research about what has long been known and practiced in the East as a powerful system for healing. More importantly, earlier in 2026, after several years of studying the healing efficacy of Qigong, the VA announced that qualified MQG practitioners would be authorized to treat, not just teach, millions of VA patients around the country. A program has been established with the National Qigong Association to facilitate the qualification of Qigong practitioners for this enormous market of patients in need. MQG gives patients autonomy One of the concerns patients have raised with Western medicine is the loss of autonomy. Whether receiving tests and scans, taking prescribed pills (or pills to ease the side effects of other pills), or going on the table to receive surgery or radiation interventions, many patients feel that control over their own healing is largely out of their hands. Yet autonomy and sovereignty over one’s body are perhaps the single most indispensable part of our existence. MQG takes an entirely different approach. “Teach a man to fish”: patients are taught how to sense into their own bodies and then to direct the vibration of their own voices, the stretching and arcing of their own limbs, and the visualization of light to clear out any stagnations or blockages they may feel in themselves. Patients are encouraged to apply these techniques at any time, on any day, sensing, modulating, and steadily shifting the energetic equilibrium in their bodies to a healthier state. The more they practice, the more they will remove blockages and suppressed emotions and feel their bodies and emotional states even more, creating a virtuous cycle of sensing and healing, sensing and healing, which can over time ameliorate both physical and emotional illness. Changes in mindset and the “energetic aquarium” At least as important as these physical exercises, MQG also strongly encourages patients to reflect on the energetic “aquarium” in which they live and eliminate ongoing sources of negative energy. Removing anger from the body through MQG exercises is great, unless the next day it is replenished because a toxic spouse or boss at work rekindles and retriggers the same emotions. This self-reflection may require even radical changes, such as quitting a job or divorcing a toxic spouse, if patients want to truly address the root causes of the emotional and physical stress that has led to their diseased state. Finally, patients will be counseled to take a penetrating look at their own behavioral patterns and mindsets. Many of us have been schooled since a young age to “be a man,” “sit down and shut up,” and suppress our voices instead of speaking our truth. That habit of suppressing emotions and swallowing the emotional sewage spewed out by others can be self-destructive and must be changed for true permanent healing to occur. Most difficult of all, MQG trains patients to practice forgiveness and to take accountability for deeds that, difficult as it is to acknowledge, we may have wrongly done ourselves. Holding subconscious guilt and resentment, and warping reality to mask our hurt, consume huge amounts of life force energy. Once freed up by MQG, that energy can be productively used instead for the immune system and a multitude of other functions requiring life force energy. Where can I find out more about Medical Qi Gong? Fewer than 1,000 MQG doctors have been certified in the U.S. (These degrees are theological doctorates to comply with U.S. regulations, not M.D.s.) My colleagues and I at California Qi Gong are among those MQG doctors, with years of training and clinical work directly under Dr. Jerry Alan Johnson, “the father of Medical Qi Gong in the West,” as well as extensive other healing experience. It was Dr. Johnson whose eleven MQG books documented and brought back to the U.S. dozens of protocols he learned in Chinese MQG hospitals in the 1990s. Our mission is to bring the healing powers of MQG especially to those who can least afford it, and hence we have provided over 80 pro bono training workshops with homeless shelters, VA patients, dementia wards, and women with cancer. We are also launching a Master’s of Energetic Medicine (M.E.M.) degree certification program in January 2027, training people to use the power of Medical Qi Gong and other healing traditions through over 600 hours of clinical and classroom training. Please see www.californiaqigong.com or email leonard.h.shen@gmail.com for more information about our classes and the master’s program. Follow me on LinkedIn for more info! Read more from Leonard Shen Leonard Shen, Doctor of Chinese Energetic Medicine & Buddhist Lama Leonard Shen is a Doctor, Lawyer, Buddhist Lama, and Priest. He has dedicated his life to public service, first as a Harvard-trained environmental advocate and Fortune 100 corporate chief ethics and compliance officer, and now bringing the 4,000-year-old healing tradition of Medical Qi Gong to clients and students through his non-profit. Dr. Shen and his colleagues at California Qi Gong provide treatments and online training, including for those who can least afford medical care. They are recognized experts, including presenting their work at Harvard Medical School in May 2026 and being featured in National Qi Gong Association webinars and publications. Medical Qi Gong is used to treat a host of diseases, including cancer, chronic fatigue, menopause, and trauma-related illnesses.

Written by Connie Ng, Holistic Practitioner, Quantum Healing Facilitator & Transformational Coach Connie Ng is an international speaker helping people overcome chronic pain, mobility issues, and complex health challenges, especially when conventional approaches fall short. Integrating Five Elements philosophy, vibrational medicine, and mind-body coaching, she empowers clients to reclaim their health, reconnect with who they truly are, and create lasting transformation. Opening the windows on a lovely spring morning takes optimism when the next twenty minutes are spent sneezing. Everyone else admires the blossoms, you are counting the tissues left for breakfast. Here in Canberra, where I live, spring is beautiful, but appreciating it is harder when your eyes will not stop watering. Respiratory health was where my holistic healing work began. I owned what was then Canberra’s only salt therapy clinic. More than 90% of my clients came with respiratory concerns, and spring was particularly busy. Having lived with asthma in childhood, allergies, sinusitis, and eczema myself, I hardly needed convincing that breathing comfortably could change someone’s day. It still has a very personal place in my practice and my life. What surprises some people is where a conversation about their nose can lead. Before long, we may be discussing bloating, meals that leave them heavy and tired, or a digestive complaint they have put up with for years. Through the Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) Five Elements principles, those details belong together. There is a mother involved, and she deserves some attention. The lungs have a mother In Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), the Earth element is associated with the Spleen and Stomach, while Metal corresponds to the Lungs and Large Intestine. Earth generates Metal. In the language of the TCM Five Elements, the mother nourishes her child, which gives digestion an important place in how we understand respiratory well-being. The TCM Spleen describes a functional system that transforms food into nourishment and transports fluids, rather than the anatomical spleen alone. When that function is weakened, the traditional interpretation is that the Lungs receive less support and fluids become harder to manage. Dampness and Phlegm can accumulate. Someone may arrive talking about congestion, yet their bloating, loose stools, or fatigue may be part of the pattern that deserves attention. TCM pattern assessment recognises several presentations of hay fever, or allergic rhinitis. The “International Evidence-Based Guidelines for Traditional Chinese Medicine Management of Allergic Rhinitis” include Spleen Qi deficiency alongside other patterns, such as Lung Qi and Kidney Yang deficiency. That variety matters. Even within the same tradition, hay fever does not come with one explanation stamped on everyone’s forehead. Pollen explains the allergic trigger, while my TCM Five Elements training prompts me to examine how the person is functioning between exposures as well. The body has a history that extends beyond this morning’s pollen count. Ancient Chinese common sense has a long memory Growing up Singaporean Chinese, I encountered this way of thinking well before I could explain it. With my childhood respiratory history, keeping my feet, shoulders, and joints warm and avoiding icy drinks were ordinary parts of life. My family did not need a wellness podcast to suggest that my constitution deserved consideration. I wrote about that upbringing in “Why the Same Biohack Can Energise One Person and Exhaust Another”. Food had a constitutional temperature with a place in the season, as well as ingredients. How it agreed with the unique constitution of the person eating it mattered. It has never been about one diet that fits or fixes all. That perspective still influences my macrobiotic work. In TCM, lingering mucus belongs to a wider pattern of Dampness and Phlegm, where fluids accumulate and obstruct healthy function. Naturopathic attention to the body’s “terrain” offers another way to consider that stagnation. When excess airway mucus is poorly cleared, it can provide conditions in which microbes flourish. My “mucus-free” dietary approach focuses on this excess, considering dairy, sugary, and rich foods traditionally associated with Dampness, according to constitution. Even fruit, such as oranges, deserves consideration of how it agrees with someone’s digestion, bringing us back to the TCM relationship between Spleen Qi, fluid management, and the formation of Dampness and Phlegm. At my salt therapy clinic, I used to tell clients that if they forgot everything else I had just said, they should remember one important thing when they walked out: start drinking warm or hot water, comfortably sipped. I often used the image of warm air expanding and cold air contracting to explain the traditional association of warmth with movement. In TCM, Cold can constrain Qi, while warmth encourages its flow. The Lungs normally disperse and descend Qi. Congestion can reflect disruption of that movement. Warm water was my simple starting point for supporting digestive warmth and fluid movement, particularly in someone with a Cold pattern. The kettle had a surprisingly important and active role in that daily routine. Such a modest habit could become a game changer in elevating their respiratory and digestive wellbeing. Wood can upset the family In the Five Elements, spring belongs to Wood, the season of new growth, linked with the Liver and Gallbladder. Wind is its associated climatic influence, bringing the changeable weather familiar to many hay fever sufferers. Earth corresponds to the Spleen and Stomach, Metal to the Lungs and Large Intestine. In the controlling cycle, Ke, Wood regulates Earth, and Metal keeps Wood in check. A little regulation helps the family function. Trouble enters when that control becomes excessive. Wood overacting on Earth, called Cheng, describes Liver disharmony disrupting the digestive function of the Spleen and Stomach. In the insulting cycle, Wu, Wood pushes back against Metal, reversing the usual direction of control. Liver disharmony can therefore enter the TCM discussion of respiratory symptoms as well as digestive complaints. Think of a mother struggling to nourish her child while someone keeps interrupting her. Supporting her and addressing the disruption are different tasks, although both may matter. The person’s symptoms help me consider which relationships deserve attention. A spring clean with the person in mind My wellness philosophy begins with respect for the body as an intelligent, interconnected whole, constantly working to keep us alive and maintain internal balance, or homeostasis. Its housekeeping is already underway. The liver processes substances, the kidneys and bowel remove waste, mucus and phlegm help carry trapped particles out of the airways, and sweat regulates temperature. Even a fart has a job, releasing digestive gas, although its timing rarely considers polite company. When bloating, constipation, and heaviness accompany a congested head, those everyday functions deserve attention. Think of the digestive “sewerage pipes”. We readily attend to what comes into the kitchen, while often giving less thought to what leaves it. My fascination with nourishment and elimination connects Earth (Spleen and Stomach), Wood (Liver and Gallbladder), and Metal (Lungs and Large Intestine). I explored this seasonal perspective in “Is Your Body Ready for a Spring Clean? What Ancient Longevity Wisdom Can Teach Us About Detox, Part 1”. ZenCleanz’s emphasis on cleansing alongside nourishment, using fermented plant enzymes and whole-food ingredients, fits that interest. Its seven-day Rainbow Protocol combines digestive and liver and gallbladder cleansing programmes, bringing Earth and Wood into the same conversation we have just had about Metal. For those with less time, ZenCleanz ONE offers a one-day format designed to support elimination while nourishing digestion. Further information on the TCM Five Elements detox kits and details of my reader discount appear below the article. Choosing either involves considering health history, medicines, and nutritional needs. Someone depleted may first need strengthening. Daily habits matter beyond any programme. A tissue box tells only part of the story Two people can both describe “terrible hay fever” and mean rather different experiences. One has streaming eyes and sudden bouts of sneezing. Another feels persistently blocked, with thicker mucus and a heavy head. Digestive discomfort adds another clue, even when the tissue boxes look identical. As a Biochemic Therapy Practitioner certified by the Schussler Institute of Biochemic Therapy, I individually select practitioner-prescribed Tissue Salts that are not available over the counter. My facial and tongue assessments come from the German naturopathic tradition taught in my Biochemic Therapy training. Alongside constitution, diet, and lifestyle, these observations inform my selection. My developing framework also compares reported symptoms with recognised TCM patterns of disharmony, comparing notes with the comprehensive TCM tongue diagnosis and drawing on my Five Elements training as a separate interpretive framework. For a streaming nose with repeated sneezing, I might consider Nat Mur #8 and Mag Phos #7, traditionally associated with watery discharge and spasmodic symptoms. Thick white mucus would prompt consideration of Kali Mur #4 and whether the wider picture suggests Phlegm-Dampness in TCM. Digestive acidity might bring Nat Phos #9 into consideration, while Nat Sulph #10 has traditional associations with liver and fluid-balance concerns. The question becomes how those observations fit the Earth, Wood, and Metal relationships, rather than which bottle has “hay fever” on it. These are examples of my selection process, not a formula for every reader. In “Can 12 Mineral Salts Change How We Think About Cellular Optimisation?”, I introduced this part of my toolkit. Two noses may look equally miserable while the people attached to them need rather different conversations and individually prescribed combinations of Tissue Salts. A different experience in Vancouver My work also includes integrated 0’Ishiki and Star Magic Healing. I begin with 0’Ishiki energetic clearing before moving into Star Magic quantum healing, adapting the session to the person. Dietary and lifestyle conversations may accompany that work. A client in Vancouver shared an anonymous review for my website that has stayed with me. She described “a sinus/allergic reaction”, with a blocked nose and persistent sniffling. What struck her first was the speed of the experience: “When the session started, I was surprised by the power and speed, but I quickly got used to it.” She rated her initial discomfort at 8.5/10 and described feeling energy flowing through her brain during the session. Afterward, she wrote: “And my nose was feeling better after the session. It went down to 1.5/10 and progressively unblocked moments later.” This was her account of an immediate change following our integrated session. Her review ended: “I also appreciated the advice on supplements and diet in addition to the treatment itself. Thanks a lot!” I appreciate that she mentioned both. There is room for an energetic session and a useful conversation about what happens when someone goes home and makes dinner. The nose has more to say After years of living with respiratory concerns and working with people who have them, I have little patience for reducing someone’s experience to a seasonal inconvenience. Being able to sleep comfortably, enjoy a walk, or finish a conversation without reaching for another tissue makes a difference to ordinary life. Familiarity should never make us dismiss how wearing those symptoms can be or quietly narrow our expectations of life. That is a question I explored in “What Future Has Your Diagnosis Quietly Persuaded You to Stop Imagining?”. The Five Elements give me a way to explore relationships that might otherwise stay outside the conversation, while my different modalities offer several avenues for investigating what may underlie symptoms and working towards lasting improvement. Hay fever brings us to the nose, but digestion, constitution, and everyday habits give us much more to work with. Another spring need not mean resigning ourselves to the same conversation and yet another box of tissues. Before we put the tissues away, there is another part of the equation, and it takes us somewhere more personal. In Part 2, we will explore the emotional and psycho-spiritual perspectives I bring to my work, including irritation, boundaries, and what we find difficult to tolerate. “Something is getting up my nose” may prove an unexpectedly useful conversation starter. You might arrive ready to discuss the pollen and find yourself thinking about a conversation you have been avoiding. Well, I’ll leave you with that thought until Part 2. You may be surprised to learn a thing or two about yourself. Until then, keep sipping your warm water. Your nose has had quite enough of the limelight for one article. Connect with Connie Explore Connie’s services or book a complimentary clarity call to discuss your concerns and whether her approach feels right for you. Follow me on Facebook and Instagram for more info! Read more from Connie Ng Connie Ng, Holistic Practitioner, Quantum Healing Facilitator & Transformational Coach Connie Ng is a Multi-Disciplined Holistic Practitioner and Quantum Healing Facilitator who specialises in helping clients overcome chronic physical and emotional conditions by addressing their root cause at the energetic level. Blending Five Elements wisdom with Star Magic Healing, vibrational medicine, and holistic counselling, she facilitates deep transformation for those who feel stuck despite trying everything. Connie is the founder of The Salt Therapy Clinic & Sanctuary and works with clients both in-person and remotely. Curious to experience ZenCleanz for yourself? Shop through my practitioner link and enter promo code: CONNIENG at checkout to receive 5% off your order. ZenCleanz practitioner link. Affiliate disclosure: I am a Holistic Practitioner and Affiliate who uses ZenCleanz products in my clinical practice. I may receive a commission from purchases made through my affiliate link.

Written by Valerie Priester, Self-Trust & Clarity Guide for Established Women Entrepreneurs Valerie Priester is a Self-Trust & Clarity Guide who helps established, heart-centered women entrepreneurs build unshakable self-trust. She supports them in moving forward with clarity, courage, and consistent action. Sometimes the hardest decisions are not the ones where we do not know what to do. They are the ones where we already know what is true and have to decide whether we are willing to honor it. There is a particular kind of discomfort that comes when you have outgrown something before you are ready to let it go. Maybe it is an offer that once felt exciting but now feels heavy. A way of working that helped you build your business but no longer supports the woman you have become. A commitment you keep honoring even though something inside you has been quietly asking for change. Or maybe it is more personal than that. A boundary you know you need to set. A conversation you have been avoiding. A desire you keep minimizing because acknowledging it would require you to make a different choice. In those moments, we often tell ourselves we need more clarity. We think a little more time, another conversation, another opinion, or one more piece of information will finally reveal the answer. But sometimes clarity is not what is missing. Sometimes we already know. The real question is whether we trust ourselves enough to choose what is true. When clarity asks something of you Clarity can feel wonderful when it confirms the direction you were already hoping to take. It feels very different when it asks you to change something. This is where many accomplished women find themselves caught between what they know and what they are willing to do with what they know. You can be deeply self-aware and still hesitate. You can have years of business experience and still wonder whether you are making the right decision. You can know that something no longer fits and still feel reluctant to release it. That hesitation does not necessarily mean your clarity is wrong. Sometimes it simply means the decision matters. When you have built something meaningful, there can be history attached to your choices. There may be people affected by them. There may be expectations, relationships, financial considerations, or an identity you have carried for years. So, you begin negotiating with yourself. Maybe I should give it more time. Maybe I am expecting too much. Maybe I should be grateful for what I have. Maybe changing direction means I failed. Slowly, the truth you initially recognized becomes buried beneath everything you think you should consider before allowing yourself to honor it. Self-trust changes the question There was a time when I thought good decisions came from being certain. I wanted to know that I had considered every possibility and that the choice I made would lead to the outcome I wanted. Life and business have taught me something different. There are decisions we will never be able to make with complete certainty because we cannot know everything that will happen on the other side of them. What we can know is whether we are being honest with ourselves. That distinction has changed the way I think about clarity. Instead of asking only, “How do I know this is the right decision?” I have learned to ask a different question: "What do I know to be true right now?" There is freedom in that question because it brings you back to yourself. Not to the expectations surrounding you, not to what worked three years ago, and not to what someone else believes you should do. It brings you back to yourself. That is where self-trust begins to change the way you make decisions. Your next level may require a more honest choice We talk often about reaching the next level in business. Usually, the conversation centers on what we need to add: a new strategy, a bigger audience, another offer, more visibility, more opportunity. But growth also asks us to become more discerning. Sometimes the next level is not asking you to add something. It is asking you to tell the truth about what no longer belongs there. For me, one of those areas was the way I had structured my business, which no longer supported my capacity. Perhaps, for you, an offer that made sense for an earlier version of your business no longer reflects the work you most want to do. Could it be that you have been saying yes because you do not want to disappoint someone, even though every yes has been pulling you farther away from yourself? Or perhaps the vision itself has changed. There is nothing inherently wrong with what came before. Something does not have to be bad for it to no longer be right for you. That is one of the most important distinctions we can make as we grow. We are allowed to appreciate what something gave us and still recognize that its season is complete. Boundaries are clarity made visible One of the clearest places we see this tension is in our boundaries. A boundary often begins long before we communicate it. It begins with noticing. You notice where resentment has started replacing generosity. You notice what consistently drains your energy. You notice the commitments you keep making out of obligation rather than desire. You notice the places where your words say yes while something inside you is saying no. That awareness is clarity. The boundary is what happens when you decide to honor it. That can be uncomfortable, especially for women who care deeply about other people. Choosing yourself does not mean you stop caring. It means your care for others no longer requires abandoning yourself. You can be thoughtful and still say no. You can be compassionate and still change your mind. You can understand someone else's disappointment without making their disappointment the authority over your decision. This is where self-trust becomes more than an idea. It becomes something you live. Aligned decisions are not always comfortable decisions We sometimes imagine alignment as a feeling of ease. Everything clicks. The path opens. We feel completely certain and move forward without hesitation. Occasionally, it happens that way. But some of the most aligned decisions you will ever make may still feel difficult. There may be grief in them. There may be uncertainty. There may be a period when the old choice is gone, and the new one has not fully taken shape. There may even be moments when you wonder whether it would have been easier to stay where you were. Ease is not the only evidence of alignment. Sometimes alignment feels like relief underneath the discomfort. It is the quiet exhale that comes when you stop arguing with yourself. It is the energy that returns when your choices and your truth are no longer moving in opposite directions. It is realizing that you do not have to keep carrying something simply because you have carried it for a long time. The courage to choose what is true If you are standing in front of a decision right now, you may not need to force yourself to make it faster. You may simply need enough space to hear yourself without all the other voices in the room. Notice what you know before you begin explaining it away. Notice what feels true before you start building the case against it. Notice where you are asking for permission when what you really need is the courage to give yourself permission. Then consider what honoring that truth might look like. It does not have to be dramatic. One honest conversation can be an aligned decision. One boundary can be an aligned decision: one no, or one yes. One change in direction. One choice to stop carrying what no longer belongs in the life or business you are creating. This is the quiet courage of aligned decisions. Not having every answer. Not knowing exactly what comes next. But trusting yourself enough to let what you know become part of how you choose. Let your next choice reflect what you know If you have been second-guessing a decision, questioning what you already know, or recognizing that something in your business no longer feels true, you do not have to work through that alone. Inside The Confident Clarity Pathway™, this is the work we do together: creating space to hear your own voice more clearly, deepen your self-trust, and make decisions that reflect the woman you are now and the life and business you are choosing to create. If this resonates, I invite you to book a Next Level Clarity Session. We will explore what is present for you, where you may be second-guessing yourself, and whether The Confident Clarity Pathway™ is the right support for your next season. Schedule your Next Level Clarity Session today. Designing your victory is a choice. Start today by honoring the truth you have been waiting for someone else to validate. Follow Valerie on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn, or visit her website for more info. Read more from Valerie Priester Valerie Priester, Self-Trust & Clarity Guide for Established Women Entrepreneurs Valerie Priester is a Self-Trust & Clarity Guide who helps established, heart-centered women entrepreneurs build unshakable self-trust so they can move forward with clarity, courage, and consistent action. As the creator of The Confident Clarity Pathway, she blends reflective depth with grounded planning to help women expand without overworking or abandoning themselves. Her work centers on one belief: "When women trust themselves deeply, they move boldly."