top of page

Why Positive Affirmations Don’t Work – And What Does

  • Oct 30, 2020
  • 3 min read

Updated: Dec 7, 2020

Written by: Aimee Teesdale, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise

Whenever I think of people using positive affirmations, I am reminded of the scene in the movie American Beauty, where the realtor is affirming to herself: “I will sell this house today, I will sell this house today” - all whilst tears are streaming down her face, appearing to contradict the very words that are coming out of her mouth.


Indeed, I come across many people who try to use positive affirmations in order to make themselves feel more confident, happy or positive - only for it to often have the exact opposite effect. After all, the typical reason why people tend to use affirmations is because they don’t actually believe what they are affirming.


So whenever they say the affirmation, they are simultaneously met with the voice that whispers: ‘But we both know that’s not true’. And yet, at the same time, our words ARE powerful. Our words CAN create states of being that then give rise to our actions and results in the world.


So how then can we use our words to create positive and powerful states of being without making us feel worse? The answer lies in diagnosing the counter belief that is the cause of our desire to use an affirmation in the first place. Feel the need to affirm that you are a confident person? Ok, great, let’s look at why you don’t already believe that you are.

It’s by diagnosing the limiting belief that we are then able to delete it, effectively making space in our minds for a new belief to be created, or declared, and downloaded into our mind.


These are the first 4 steps in my signature 5-Step Framework, the simple yet powerful method I use with myself and my clients to reprogramme our mindsets and thus reprogramme our lives for success: Diagnose, Delete, Declare, Download.


The reason why affirmations don’t work, then, is because people are essentially attempting to skip to step 3 (Declare) without having done Step 1 (Diagnose) and Step 2 (Delete) first.


So you might be wondering, well, how exactly does one delete a limiting belief?

By forgiving themselves for having believed it in the first place.


When one can see that the belief was never actually true to begin with, and that it was simply a false interpretation of events based on a limited perception and level of consciousness, it becomes easier to let go of it.


Then one can create a new belief - the equivalent of an affirmation - and declare it to be true without ‘the voice’ insisting otherwise.


The fifth step in the 5-Step Framework? It’s ‘Do’ - in other words, to ACT from this new state of being and a new mindset.


And that’s how you create results you’ve never created before and reach new levels of success.


If you’d like more information about The 5-Step Framework, you can download my free ebook where I explain it in more detail plus The 3 Pillars that are necessary for it to be effective, or listen to me using it in real-life coaching sessions to transform the lives of entrepreneurs and change-makers around the world by subscribing to my podcast, Next Level Success.


Tipped to be the next big name in the coaching industry, you can connect with her via her website or Instagram!

Aimee Teesdale, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Aimee Teesdale is an international six-figure success coach, speaker, author, podcast host and digital nomad who is living her dream life whilst enabling others to live theirs. Using her signature 5D Method™, Fearless Framework™ and Love.To.G.I.V.E Approach™, she enables service-based business owners and entrepreneurs to accelerate towards six-figure success and create financial security, freedom and prosperity from doing only what they love faster than ever. Her ability to create such rapid transformational results with her clients is due to her personal experience overcoming 20 years' of struggle, fear and severely limiting beliefs and discovering what the secret to success - both for individuals and humanity - really is: less fear, more love.

 
 

This article is published in collaboration with Brainz Magazine’s network of global experts, carefully selected to share real, valuable insights.

Article Image

Four Things Leaders Must Get Right to Make Digital Transformation Actually Work

Many organizations do not fail at purchasing technology; they fail at the subsequent digital transformation activities: how the workflow changes, whether staff have the skills to adjust and perform...

Article Image

Your Color Season Isn’t Supposed to Put You in a Box

You finally find out your color season, get your palette, go home, look at your closet, and suddenly think, “Wait... am I allowed to wear any of this anymore?” This is where color analysis can go a little...

Article Image

10 Ways to 5X Your Business by the End of 2026

You don’t need to become less human to become more successful. You need to become better at being human because your business can only expand to the degree that you can hold the...

Article Image

There's Nothing Wrong With You, You've Just Been Stuck in Survival Mode

You've done the work. You've gone to therapy, read the books, followed the frameworks, and still, self-sabotage shows up right when you're closest to the goal: the video you don't post, the book you...

Article Image

Who Am I When I’m No Longer Needed in the Same Way?

A month ago, my husband and I travelled to spend time with our adult children. Like many parents, I had quietly imagined what those few days would look like. Long conversations. Family bonding.

Article Image

The Three T’s of Relationships and How to Audit Your Inner Circle and Protect Your Peace

Many relationships collapse under the weight of a beautiful yet deeply misunderstood ideal: unconditional love. We are often conditioned to believe that true devotion means staying "no matter what."

Four Things Leaders Must Get Right to Make Digital Transformation Actually Work

Your Color Season Isn’t Supposed to Put You in a Box

5 Reasons the Teen Years Are the Greatest Opportunity Your Child Has to Shape Who They Become

10 Evidence-Based Nutritional Supports for Women

Why Kobido is the Future of Natural Facial Rejuvenation

What Happens When These 4 Pressures Take Command

The Difference Between Rest and Retreat

11 Ways the Performing Arts Build Confidence and Practical Life Skills in Young People

The Practice of Returning and Why Yoga and Meditation Are More Than Wellness

bottom of page