When To Walk Away From Someone Who Is Not Meeting Your Needs
- Jul 1, 2024
- 3 min read
Meagan Brody is a Relationship and Communications Coach who helps her clients connect better within their own relationships and helps those looking for a relationship find the right partner. Although she studied Psychology, for ten years she worked in fashion pursuing the creative side of marketing.
It is hard to walk away from someone that you care about. Is caring enough to stay? No. It is very easy to care for someone and very hard to leave a relationship when you still care. I once had to walk away from something that I thought was meant for me and it felt like the hardest decision I ever made at that time. However, I knew I had to put myself first and I knew that I had to leave for the sake of my own self-respect. I knew what I was looking for and what I wanted in a partner, and it wasn’t him. In retrospect, it was the best thing I have ever done for myself. By leaving, I was able to gain real and true fulfillment in my life. We often put the other person ahead of ourselves when it comes to needs, but any relationship that is worth being in consists of both people’s needs being met. It is otherwise unsustainable.
The fantasy
Don’t let the fantasy you have about someone cloud your vision to see who they really are. You cannot be fulfilled by someone who you are creating in your head. The sooner you see them for who they are, the faster you are on track to being with the right person. Fantasizing someone into a person who they are not is only going to lead you to deceive yourself. You want your partner to show you fully who they are, so that you can make the right choice for your future and how they fit into it.
Facts vs. assumptions
Look at the facts. What are the facts and what are the assumptions? Are you assuming that someone will change, or have they actually shown you change? Are you assuming that they will be a good partner or are they actually being a good partner? When you lean too heavily on assumptions, you are tricking yourself into, once again, believing that someone is who they are not. When you are able to look at the facts and see what this person brings to the table in the relationship, you can lay it out like data. Use this data. A good way to look at the data is to imagine if someone else were to bring those aspects into the relationship, not the person you are hyping up. For instance, if you were on a first date and they told you they never wanted to have kids, but you do want to have kids, you probably wouldn’t make a second date with them. If your partner says they don’t want kids, but you are assuming that they will change their mind after being with you for many years, then you are not being true to yourself, and instead, you are leaning too heavily on the assumptions. Think about what you are willing to accept in a partner and what you are not willing to accept. See where the person you are dating falls into each of those categories and don’t gloss over the facts.
Starting over
Don’t be afraid to start over. The idea of starting again feels scary, but it’s all about mindset. It isn’t scary, it’s the start of a new chapter. This time you are not starting from scratch, you are starting from experience. Your experience is going to bring you new levels of self-respect, self-love, and self-awareness. This will lead you to the right person and fulfillment in your relationship.
Meagan Brody, Relationship and Communications Coach
Meagan Brody is a Relationship and Communications Coach who helps her clients connect better within their own relationships and helps those looking for a relationship find the right partner. Although she studied Psychology, for ten years she worked in fashion pursuing the creative side of marketing. As she has transitioned into Life Coaching, she has realized that her creative abilities have helped her clients in reaching their full potential; whether that be in their relationships, personal growth or confidence in the real world. Meagan is NLP Certified (Neuro-Linguistics Programming) and has used these techniques to help her clients with various mindset goals.
