Pleasure Is The Missing Link
- Aug 31, 2021
- 3 min read
Written by: Ailsa Keppie, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Many people these days are not doing well. I say that after hearing from a couple of close friends who shared about their personal experiences of deep depression this summer. And it has been a strange and challenging year, no doubt about that! But why are so many people really struggling just to put one foot in front of the other or questioning the point of getting out of bed at all?
Is it the fault of the virus we have all been hearing about so much or the conflicts that seem to be ramping up about how to deal with it? Is it the fault of the governments who haven’t provided enough support through this whole year and a half ordeal? Is it the fault of having to isolate and not see our friends and loved ones in person? Are we touch-deprived? Sanity deprived? Nature deprived? Purpose deprived?
Maybe all of those things are there but there is actually something we still have personal control over and can take action on; creating and experiencing pleasure. Pleasure? You ask. I know it seems unimportant or trivial or even downright irresponsible to be thinking about pleasure in the middle of a worldwide crisis but I challenge you to stay with me here for a minute.
We are wired, like most animals, to move away from pain and towards pleasure. We can show this in many biological settings and experiments. But what does this mean for our everyday life?
What it means is we can choose what we focus on. We can choose to focus on the pain and how to avoid it at all costs or we can focus on pleasure and how we can experience more of that. So which way do you want to orient your experience?
It seems simple to me. If I focus on the pain and the difficulties, I withdraw. I numb out and hide more and more from a world that only seems to be getting worse. Before long I’m afraid to go outside, to talk to real people, to go to the supermarket. I begin to lose my will to do ordinary daily tasks. It all seems overwhelming and pointless. I become depressed.
If, on the other hand, I focus on pleasure, on what feels good to my body or what uplifts my soul, I find I am drawn to notice more and more ways to be useful, both to myself and others. A bouquet of flowers given to a neighbour today, a few fresh shiitake mushrooms for dinner with my beloved, a smile as I walk past some particularly rowdy pigeons on a city street. What do you find pleasure in?
Maybe today, when you sit down at the end of the evening, and think things over, remember one thing that brought you pleasure. No matter how small or insignificant it seems, as yourself if it uplifts you, makes your heart feel lighter, brings a smile to your face. If it does, then you have just experienced the power of pleasure healing!
Don’t wait until you feel depressed to try this, make it a habit in your life and see if it changes your outlook. I’ll bet all the pain in the world, it does!
With pleasure,
Ailsa
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Ailsa Keppie, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Ailsa is a trained intimacy Educator and Somatic Therapist and has been working in hands-on bodywork, somatic coaching, and healing for over a decade. Ailsa Keppie brings aspects from her background in circus arts, physical theatre, music, dance, myofascial release, bioenergetic processes, archetypes, and spirituality to her work with clients. She is a published author of her compelling memoir entitled "By the Light of the Crescent Moon," which describes her incredible journey into Islam and polygamy and how it lead to her awakening and reclamation of her own Eros and power. Ailsa works with individuals, couples, and groups both online and in-person at her retreat center, Our Celtic Hearth, in Nova Scotia, Canada, where she resides with her current life partner.
