Why High-Functioning People Struggle to Stop Drinking and Why It’s Not About Willpower
- Brainz Magazine
- Jul 7
- 4 min read
Updated: Jul 8
Written by Sonia Grimes, Alcohol Control Coach
Sonia Grimes is The Alcohol Control Coach and founder of The Simply Sober Path. She helps high-achieving individuals break free from the Alcohol Illusion and silence Alcohol Noise–creating lasting freedom with confidence and ease.
For high-achieving, capable people who “have it together” on the outside, the private battle with alcohol can be one of the most misunderstood and silently painful struggles.
And the reason so many intelligent, successful individuals find it difficult to stop drinking–or simply to drink moderately–is because the focus is on alcohol.
Limiting, being mindful, or total abstinence of the substance... that isn’t the root of the problem.
So, what is the alcohol trap if it isn’t alcohol? Here’s the answer.
It’s because of what the mind still believes alcohol gives them.
If alcohol felt like poison in the moments when you were exhausted, overwhelmed, or in need of something to take the edge off, no one would struggle to walk away from it.
But in the moments that matter most–when the stress builds, the overwhelm ramps up, or when any emotional need is unmet, life feels harder and you feel less able to cope–alcohol still feels like it helps.
That’s what keeps you stuck.
It’s not a lack of willpower – It’s the meaning alcohol still holds
It’s not a lack of discipline. It’s not weakness. And it’s certainly not because you don’t want to stop.
It’s because a part of your mind still sees alcohol as relief.
And no amount of willpower can override your need to feel better.
In fact, the harder you fight using willpower alone, the more exhausted you become–and the more likely you are to return to the very thing you're trying to escape.
This is what I call The Alcohol Illusion–the false belief that alcohol brings comfort, connection, reward, or space to breathe. That belief, even if unconscious, is powerful enough to override logic, values, and even consequences.
The hidden conflict: Why the battle feels so exhausting
Here’s the part no one talks about:
Your mind isn’t fighting alcohol.
It’s fighting the meaning alcohol still holds.
That meaning lives deep below the surface–in the part of the mind that isn’t logical, but emotional. It doesn’t care that alcohol leads to regret, poor sleep, or missed opportunities. It only remembers that it felt like relief–even for five minutes.
So you make another promise. You draw another line in the sand.
And yet somehow, the bottle wins again.
That internal tug-of-war–between knowing the damage alcohol causes and still feeling like it helps–is what I call Alcohol Noise. It’s loud, exhausting, and relentless. Not because you’re failing–but because alcohol still feels like the solution.
Until that belief is dismantled, the conflict remains. And no strategy feels sustainable.
Freedom comes when alcohol stops making emotional sense
Here’s what most people don’t realize:
The real battle isn’t with the drink in your hand–it’s with the belief that drinking is the only way to feel better, calmer, or more in control.
And that belief doesn’t disappear through effort or abstinence. It disappears through awareness.
Once alcohol stops making emotional sense, the desire for it dissolves.
You don’t resist the drink–you simply no longer want it.
That’s the shift that changes everything.
It’s the foundation of the work I do with high-performing clients–many of whom don’t see themselves as “addicted,” but feel stuck in a cycle they can’t explain.
Through a framework I call The Simply Sober Path, we break through The Alcohol Illusion and silence Alcohol Noise–so drinking becomes an effortless choice, not a compulsive need.
Because real freedom doesn’t come from restriction.
It comes from no longer needing what once felt essential.
When alcohol no longer represents relief, escape, or reward, there’s nothing to give
up.
No more mental negotiations. No more guilt. No more pretending. Just Awareness. Control. And peace of mind.
So if you’ve ever found yourself wondering why you keep going back to something that makes you feel worse, know this:
There is nothing wrong with you.
You were responding to a belief that felt true in the moment.
But once you see through the illusion, the struggle ends.
You’ve always had the power–now you have the truth.
Sonia Grimes
The Alcohol Control Coach
CREA Global Award Winner | Helping high-functioning professionals take back control from alcohol–without the fight
Take the next step
After 29 years of struggling with alcohol and over a decade of living in complete ease and freedom, I can tell you with certainty:
When you finally see alcohol through the lens of The Alcohol Illusion – the belief it eases stress or makes you feel better, when in truth it only ever leaves you feeling worse – the path to effortless change becomes clear.
The journey out of alcohol pain and back into peace becomes The Simply Sober Path.
If you're ready to break free from your daily drinking battle and return to ease, clarity, and control, there are two powerful ways to begin:
Click HERE to book your complimentary 20-minute Take Back Control Call
or
Join my FREE 7-Day Alcohol Reset Experience to discover the truth about your drinking–and how to change it.
You don’t have to do this alone. And you don’t have to stop for ever.
You just need to see alcohol differently.
Read more from Sonia Grimes
Sonia Grimes, Alcohol Control Coach
Sonia Grimes is The Alcohol Control Coach and creator of The Simply Sober Path™. She helps high-achieving individuals break free from the Alcohol Illusion and silence Alcohol Noise–with confidence, self-trust, and lasting peace. After overcoming a 29-year battle with alcohol, Sonia now leads a powerful movement of effortless control and self-reclamation. Her mission is to help people take back their power and live fully as their truest selves.
