Written by: Susan Watson, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Every day of my life, I hear people reach out to me and say, “I hope you can work your magic on me,” and every day, I say, "You have your own magic." The one thing I share with every client that comes along to see me is this; I have no special skills – no magic wand, and I am just the same as you are. The difference is I know how we can make lasting changes, and I will share that with you.
The one thing I share with every client that comes along to see me is this; I have no special skills – no magic wand, and I am just the same as you are. The difference is I know how we can make lasting changes, and I will share that with you.
You see, every one of us has our own magic. No one makes changes for us. We always do it for ourselves. As a therapist and a coach, we work as a team; I show you 'how-to,' and you do all the hard work and make all the changes.
So how do you find your magic, and what does this kind of session look and feel like?
We work as a team. We both have a part to play. I try and make it as relaxed as possible. What we do depends on your needs and age. One thing is for sure, I try and make change fun. We may have tears – that is okay, and we may also have laughter. Even working with complex trauma, we manage to smile and laugh through change.
The game-changer for everyone is the education and understanding of the mind and body. Learning to come out of your head and back into your body and listen. Do not just listen but try to understand the messages you receive every second of every day. Then importantly, know what to do in response. Knowing that you can do simple little exercises to dial down stress, anxiety, fear, and anger in seconds can be liberating and empowering.
Knowing that you no longer will have unwanted emotions, thoughts, and reactions that rule your life, brings a sense of freedom that most people believed they would never experience. In fact, those emotions are not wrong and they do not mean that you are ill. All those emotions and reactions are based on past experiences and learnings. These are fully normal and expected when you have a highly activated nervous system. Understanding how your nervous system functions, the hormones released and how this feels, and the actions that these drives are key to have the power for change.
Guess what? You are normal.
When you know this and how to calm your nervous system, you are on the road to self-regulation. To be in a position that you can regulate your own body to feel calm and relaxed whenever you need it most.
Have you ever heard of an anxious, stressed, scared or angry person who is also very relaxed?
No, because it is impossible! This is why I teach self-regulation and how to dial down the activation levels and live that calm life you wish for. To live your best life.
I really feel we are missing an opportunity here which should be taught in schools and colleges. With the numbers of young people experiencing anxiety increasing and waiting times for help, lengthening this education and learning would be so beneficial for everyone.
Now that we have covered the importance of self-regulation, let's practice a few basic exercises. Remember to get the benefits from them, you must practice them often.
1. Sit down in a place that is a safe space for you. Breathe normally and get comfortable. Place a hand on your heart and a hand on your tummy. Just close your eyes and feel the sensations of your hands, perhaps the weight or temperature. What does it feel like to have your hands on your body? Now say this “In this moment, this second of time, I am 100% safe”? Really, think about how that feels to know you are 100% safe and comfortable.
2. Sit comfortably. Breathe and drop your shoulders. Now let your jaw drop. Let it hang loose. Allow your jaw to hang there and let your tongue drop. Feel the tension leave your neck, jaw, and shoulders – do this as often as you wish.
This is just a small sample of exercises available. If you would like to know more about living a life with a regulated nervous system, please get in touch.
Susan Watson, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Susan Watson specializes in working worldwide with all ages experiencing Anxiety, Emotions, and Trauma, in a content freestyle, so that no talking really needs to take place unless wanted. Working with feelings and emotions within the body, Susan releases the emotional connection of past experiences. She teaches self-help tools to help others live their best life, the life that is deserved. Susan supports individuals, groups and the workplace with her Be Your Own Empowered Hero workshops, which were introduced as a measure to reduce the risk of future issues with mental and emotional health.