Twelve Tips From a Birth Doula

Written by Remington Steele, Intuitive Breath Practitioner, Emotional Wellness Coach & Philanthropist

Remington Steele is an Intuitive Breath Practitioner, Emotional Wellness Coach, and the visionary founder of Breathe With Rem and We Are The Village – Teen Moms. A philanthropist and author of Breathe With Me, Remington’s work is rooted in healing, empowerment, and generational transformation.

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Parenthood is one of life’s greatest transformations, a journey that awakens strength, vulnerability, and an entirely new depth of love. As both a doula and doula instructor, as well as a birth educator, I’ve witnessed how preparation, awareness, and trust can turn fear into empowerment. Birth is more than a medical event, it’s a sacred passage that calls you to partner with your body and your breath. These twelve tips are drawn from years of experience supporting parents through pregnancy, labor, and beyond, each one designed to help you approach birth not with anxiety, but with confidence and calm.

Whether you’re planning your first birth or adding another little soul to your family, these insights will guide you toward a more mindful, connected experience.

What is a doula?

A doula is a trained professional who provides emotional, physical, and informational support to individuals and families before, during, and after childbirth. Unlike medical providers such as doctors or midwives, a doula does not deliver the baby or perform clinical tasks instead, they focus on ensuring the birthing person feels empowered, informed, and supported throughout the experience. Doulas offer comfort techniques, breathing guidance, and advocacy to help families navigate labor with confidence. Their presence helps reduce stress, promote calm, and create a more positive and connected birth experience. In essence, a doula is the steady, compassionate anchor in one of life’s most transformative moments.

Who can be my doula?

Anyone who offers you consistent, loving, and informed support during birth can serve as your doula, whether that’s a certified professional, a trusted family member, or a close friend you’ve prepared for the role. What matters most is their ability to stay calm, present, and focused on your needs throughout labor. You have the right to choose who surrounds you in this sacred moment, and to build a birth team that reflects love and trust. Empower those closest to you to be part of your support system because birth is always better when you feel safe, seen, and surrounded by care.

Why is a doula beneficial to the birthing experience?

A doula is beneficial to the birthing experience because they bring both emotional grounding and hands-on expertise to every stage of labor. They know where to apply counter pressure during contractions, how to adjust positioning to ease discomfort, and when to encourage movement or stillness to help labor progress naturally. Doulas also help interpret medical terms and procedures, translating hospital language into words you can understand, so you can make informed choices about your birth. Their continuous presence ensures that you’re never alone, while doctors and nurses may rotate, your doula remains focused solely on your comfort and confidence. They remind you when to breathe, how to release tension, and when to trust your body’s natural rhythm. With their support, families often experience smoother births, less anxiety, and a deeper sense of connection to the process. Ultimately, a doula helps turn labor from something you fear into something you’re fully prepared to experience with strength and peace.

The difference between a doula and a midwife

While doulas and midwives both play vital roles in the birthing experience, their responsibilities and focus are distinctly different. A midwife is a licensed medical professional trained to provide clinical care throughout pregnancy, labor, and postpartum, including monitoring the baby’s health, performing medical exams, and assisting in delivery. A doula, on the other hand, is a non-medical support professional dedicated to the emotional, physical, and informational needs of the birthing person. Doulas guide families through the birth process with comfort measures such as breathwork, massage, positioning, and encouragement, helping parents feel informed and empowered every step of the way. While a midwife ensures safety from a medical standpoint, a doula nurtures the emotional environment, creating a calm, supportive space that enhances the overall birth experience. Together, they make a powerful team combining care for both body and spirit.

Now that you understand the difference between a doula and a midwife, let’s explore how to make the most of your birthing experience. Every birth is unique, and preparation makes all the difference. The following twelve tips are designed to help you feel confident, supported, and empowered, whether you’re working with a doula, a midwife, or both.

Twelve tips from a doula

1. Remember your postpartum care

Remember, your care doesn’t end once the baby arrives. Postpartum care is just as important as pregnancy and birth. This is a sacred time for rest, healing, and adjustment as your body, mind, and spirit recover and transform. Surround yourself with support, nourish your body with good food and hydration, and allow yourself grace as you bond with your baby. Whether through your doula, family, or community, give yourself permission to receive the care you deserve.

2. Practice in advance for your big day

Practice in advance for your big day! Just like any important event, preparation builds confidence. Spend time learning breathwork techniques, comfort positions, and relaxation methods that work best for you. Practicing with your partner or doula helps create trust and rhythm, so when labor begins, your body and mind already know what to do. The more you rehearse, the more natural and empowering your birth experience will feel.

Related article: How to Use Your Breath For Labor and Delivery

3. Your breath is your friend, guide, and doula

Your breath is your friend, guide, and doula, it’s the one tool that never leaves your side. Through every contraction, your breath grounds you, reminding you that you are safe and capable. Deep, mindful breathing helps reduce tension, manage pain, and keep your body oxygenated for both you and your baby. When you focus on your breath, you invite calm into chaos and strength into uncertainty. Trust it, it will lead you through each wave with grace and power.

4. First-time parents may want to consider birth education classes to prepare for the unknown

First-time parents may want to consider birth education classes to prepare for the unknown. These classes offer practical knowledge about each stage of labor, pain management options, and postpartum recovery, helping you feel informed and confident. Understanding what to expect can ease fear and create a sense of control during birth.

Many classes also include partner participation, allowing both parents to learn how to support one another effectively. Education empowers you to make informed decisions and approach birth with calm awareness rather than uncertainty.

5. Empower yourself with knowledge

Empower yourself with knowledge because understanding your body and your options transforms fear into confidence. Learn about the stages of labor, your birth rights, and the choices available to you. The more you know, the more you can advocate for the birth experience you desire. Knowledge helps you communicate clearly with your birth team and stay grounded in your intentions. Remember, an informed parent is an empowered parent.

6. Move your body

Move your body because movement during labor is one of your greatest allies. Swaying, rocking, squatting, or walking helps your baby move down the birth canal and encourages your cervix to open. Each movement works with gravity to guide your baby closer to birth.

Don’t be afraid to dance, stretch, or change positions. This is your time to move and

groove your baby into the world. Trust the rhythm of your body, it knows exactly what to do.

7. Practice the laboring, push, and postpartum breath

Practice the laboring, push, and postpartum breath. Each stage has its own rhythm and purpose. Your labor breath helps you stay calm and present through contractions, your pushing breath channels your power to guide your baby earthside, and your postpartum breath supports recovery of the body and emotional balance. Learning and practicing these patterns in advance allows your body to respond with ease when the time comes. Breath is your anchor through it all, steady, powerful, and always available when you need it most.

8. Know what works and doesn't beforehand

Know what works and what doesn’t beforehand because practice makes preparation. Every body and birth experience is different, so take time to explore comfort techniques, breathing styles, and positions that feel best for you. The more you practice, the more you’ll understand what truly helps you relax and focus. This self-awareness builds confidence, allowing you to enter labor prepared, not guessing. Preparation turns uncertainty into empowerment.

9. Remember to create safety in your mind and body

Remember to create safety in your mind and body. A calm mind sends powerful signals of safety to your body, helping labor progress more smoothly and reducing tension or fear. Surround yourself with soothing sounds, comforting scents, and supportive people who make you feel secure. Visualize your birth space as a peaceful and sacred place where you and your baby can work together in harmony. A baby will not rush to come into a world it doesn’t feel safe in, so nurture peace within yourself first. When your mind feels safe, your body follows, and together you create the perfect invitation for birth to unfold naturally.

10. Noise scares the baby

Noise can startle your baby, so try to keep your sounds intentional and grounded. While it’s natural to vocalize during labor, focus on low, deep tones instead of high-pitched screams. These calming vibrations reassure your baby and help your body stay relaxed and open. Remember, your baby feels everything you feel, so the more peaceful your energy, the safer they’ll feel entering the world. Let your voice be a guide of love, not fear.

11. Interview more than one doula

Interview more than one doula before making your decision. Every doula has a unique style, energy, and approach, and finding the right match makes all the difference in your birth experience. Ask about their training, philosophy, and how they handle different birth scenarios. Pay attention to how you feel in their presence. Comfort and trust are key. The right doula will feel like an extension of your support system, someone who sees, hears, and honors you fully.

12. Get to know your doula in advance

Get to know your doula in advance so that by the time labor begins, you already share trust and comfort. Spend time talking, practicing techniques, and discussing your birth preferences together. The stronger your connection, the more intuitive your doula’s support will feel when you need it most. Building this relationship early creates a sense of calm and familiarity that carries beautifully into your birthing space.

Start your journey today

Your birth journey is one of the most powerful experiences of your life, and the right support can make all the difference. Whether you’re preparing for your first birth or adding another little one to your village, remember that knowledge, preparation, and breath are your greatest tools. At Breathe With Rem, we guide parents through mindful birthing, conscious parenting, and emotional preparation so you can welcome your baby with peace and confidence. Start your journey today by visiting here or emailing breathewithrem@gmail.com to connect and learn more. You can also follow along on social media @BreatheWithRem for daily inspiration, birth tips, and upcoming classes. Your calm, confident birth begins with one mindful breath.

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Remington Steele, Intuitive Breath Practitioner, Emotional Wellness Coach & Philanthropist

Remington Steele is an Intuitive Breath Practitioner, Emotional Wellness Coach, and the visionary founder of Breathe With Rem and We Are The Village – Teen Moms. A philanthropist and author of Breathe With Me, Remington’s work is rooted in healing, empowerment, and generational transformation. As a former teen mother herself, she has turned her personal journey into a mission to guide others through intentional breathing, holistic wellness, and community-centered care.