The Road Unknown – Trials And Tribulations
- Brainz Magazine
- Mar 6, 2023
- 3 min read
Written by: JL Keez, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
As someone who has lived a life characterised by far too many “WHY's?” when my body failed and developed an eating disorder, I found that when deciding to write my first book to give the gift of knowledge, I felt the same level of overwhelm!
How do I do this? Where will guidance come from? Exactly what does guidance look like?
Gosh, I had healed a body desperately depleted, so how hard could this be? But there I was, in the depth of despair searching for answers as to the approach, the necessary inclusions, the steps to take, and finally, pulling it all together for publication.
Putting off the inevitable, procrastinating over the value of such, all to avoid a time certainly filled with frustration, I acknowledged the similarities through thought that halted my recovery. Recalling the emotional overload as I was asked, “Tell me your story”, I felt the same overload when asked, “Write your story.”
“Write your book” they said. “Don’t know if I can be bothered” I said.
Surely such a task will be a debut nightmare filled with tears, the desire to give up, and sleepless nights pondering the ‘why’ behind starting this fateful journey.
January 2020 I reluctantly opened my computer to start what I thought would be a drawn out process with regret lining my emotional temperament. Instead, recalling chapters from my life became a welcome joy.
Hesitation turned into longing to complete this manuscript and realise the dream of establishing myself as an author. February 17th 2020, first draft complete!
I proudly noted the short time duration and envisaged my book in the hands of many, inspired by the words shared. This, my friends, was where trails and tribulations began, concluding 28th November 2020, launch day.
Readers for feedback, travelling the self publishing road, cover design, formatter/interior designer, editing, author bio, photo, copyright, Goodreads, ISBN’s, paperback, ebook ‒ trials and tribulations took control.
Back and forth, way too many decisions, tired of reading the pages; tears, sleepless nights, regret, when will this end.
In conversation with a dear friend, I confided my woes. In kind response, she replied, “You have navigated this road this far and as far as I can tell whenever you were challenged with the next step the right support showed up. Am I wrong? And you have successfully met each challenge, yes?”
In quiet contemplation I saw her words were true.
Writing your first book comes with a steep learning curve, filled with previously unknown components. I can choose to crumble and bin my progress, or choose to relax and trust that all I need to know will be shown to me. The ending to this journey, yet unknown at that point, was there ‒ I simply had to keep moving toward it.
In acknowledgement of what this journey was teaching me, I saw the parallels to my healing journey.
To debut authors, and to those seeking healing from life’s damage:
Take a deep breath, relax
Be excited by the learning curve
This path will challenge, intrigue, keep strong
Surround yourself with those who have navigated this path before you
Accept the trials, the tribulations as friends guiding you toward your greatest achievement ‒ becoming an author/ being healed
Rest when necessary
Should despair show itself, learn from this moment
Do not lock in a timeline, allow the process unfolding provide the timeline
Give gratitude when steps complete
Acknowledge your progress along the way
And when all is said and done, celebrate in style!
My book, successfully launched, is a beautiful inspiration ‒ I am told. My recovery story now scribed for others is a beautiful inspiration ‒ I am told.
And this is exactly what recovery, or writing, looks like when one finally begins! Overwhelm, tears, sleepless nights, wanting to give up and consistently calling out two words, “Why?” and “Stop!” But through dedicated application, accepting the support when it turns up, and allowing the process to unfold naturally, the desired outcome will result.
Move toward the unknown end date in quiet acceptance that all will be revealed in the correct order so healing, or book completion, as the goal, will eventuate in triumph as the reward for all the hard work applied.
JL Keez, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
J.L Keez survived a nine-year struggle with anorexia nervosa. She endured years of mental illness, including suicidal depression, OCD and depersonalisation. Today, she is the Director of JL Keez Anorexia Unlocked, a passionate speaker, author and Thought Leader in her field. In her role as a Reality Therapy Coach and influential teacher she empowers others to heal their lives through delivering the understanding required to do so.
