Stop Solving for Yourself and Start Changing the Life Around You – An Interview with Miranda Jane

Miranda Jane is a somatic coach and creator of the ND Friendly Tarot cards, supporting late-identified Autistic and ADHD adults as they reconnect with their bodies, understand their needs, and build lives that feel more authentic.

Drawing on their training in Somatic Experiencing and counseling, Miranda works at the intersection of neurodivergence and trauma. Their approach combines nervous system support, radical self-acceptance, and creative tools that make healing and personal growth more accessible.

In this interview, Miranda shares their own journey of late identification, the challenges many neurodivergent adults face after years of masking, and how somatic practices and the ND Friendly Tarot can help people trust themselves, accommodate their needs, and live with greater self-compassion.

Miranda Jane, Neurodivergent Affirming Nervous System Coach

Who is Miranda Jane?

First of all, I’m a late-identified Autistic ( just figured that out a few years ago) and ADHDer (learned that in my mid-30’s). I’ve always been very physical. I took dance lessons and made up my own choreography as a kid, and even spent a few years doing Roller Derby with TXRD in Austin, TX. I went through a profound burnout with health consequences in college (as so many neurodivergent people do) and spent the next twenty years waiting tables and trying to figure out why daily life was so much harder for me than for other people. I eventually went back to school and got my Master’s in Counseling and trained in SE, which was the one thing that had really helped me to put my PTSD into remission and start living in my body again.

Now I’m a coach and creative, and my mission is to help late-identified Autistic and ADHD people listen to their bodies and trust themselves again.

I love that work, but as an entrepreneur I wanted to make a bigger impact than I could working one-on-one, so I designed a special neurodivergent (ND) affirming tarot deck and am working on other creative projects like that. I know counseling and coaching are not for everyone, and I want to find ways to bring opportunities for healing and growth in ways that are more accessible.

What inspired you to specialise in supporting late-identifying neurodivergent adults?

As long as I can remember, I felt different from other people, and like I didn’t fit in. I regularly suffered breakdowns and had unusual physical health problems. My brain function was unpredictable, and sometimes I felt smart and capable, but other times it was like I couldn’t get the lights to turn on in my brain! I had to get very creative in how I lived my life, and particularly how I navigated work and relationships.

When I finally learned I was Autistic and had ADHD, it made a world of difference, and it became a special interest for me. I had always felt like I was the problem, and suddenly I understood I’d just been expecting the wrong things from myself.

When I learned how many undiagnosed and late-identified NDs commit suicide, I think it kind of radicalized me. I want to do whatever I can to help people realize it is OK to be exactly who they are.

How does your approach differ from traditional services for Autistic and ADHD adults?

My clients often come to me believing that they are the problem, and that they need to learn to be different. And unfortunately, that’s the message they’ve received from “helping professionals” in more mainstream spaces.

Instead, I embrace the idea of “radical acceptance” and invite my clients to accept themselves exactly as they are.

I use somatic techniques, helping my clients listen to their bodies and learn how to feel their feelings. I use tools like the Safe and Sound Protocol and the Rest and Restore Protocol, which are therapeutic audio programs designed to support the nervous system. I also help people update core beliefs that no longer feel useful or accurate to them, like “I should be different” or “I need too much.”

Because therapy and coaching are often unappealing to Autistics and AuDHDers, I created the ND Friendly Tarot so people can still get my messages even without working directly with me.

What inspired you to create the ND Friendly Tarot cards, and how are they different from regular Tarot cards?

Well, at a certain point I realized I was having to do the same work with most of my late-identifying clients. They had been masking their neurodivergence their whole lives without realizing it, and now that they understood they were Autistic and ADHD, they went through waves of grief and relief. They struggled to believe they were allowed to have the needs and limits that they had, and repeatedly burned themselves out trying to do too much. They had imposter syndrome, and didn’t think they deserved support or accommodations.

The work we were doing was radical self-acceptance and self-compassion. It was about understanding themselves, so they could adjust their systems and environments to support themselves better. It was learning about neurodivergence, and finally feeling like a “normal AuDHDer” instead of an extraterrestrial or a “bad person.” And it was life-changing.

My neighbor Shelby Glaser had been giving me these amazing Tarot readings that were so healing and just blew my mind. And one day the idea hit me. I had to make a tarot deck that was all about Autism and ADHD and get it out in the world.

What are the biggest challenges your clients face when they come to you, and how do you help them overcome those?

I work with people at the intersection of neurodivergence and trauma, where a lot of people have dissociated from their physical existence and only identify with their minds. This leaves them vulnerable in many ways, and I want to give them access to their physical sensations and emotions so they can have more accurate personal information as they’re making decisions and navigating their lives.

It’s a pretty common experience (for Autistic people especially) to hate feeling their feelings, or to fear that their emotions are dangerous. There are good reasons for that, but it doesn’t have to stay that way. When we accommodate the neurodivergence, bring support to the nervous system, and directly address the experiences that led them to fear feelings, things start to shift.

How do you help clients stop masking and start living authentically?

Actually, I think the ND Tarot is great for that. So many of us don’t even realize we’re masking and people-pleasing; we’re “performing human” because just being authentic wasn’t a safe option earlier in our lives. When you do an ND Friendly Tarot spread, it helps you question that default way of being and double-check to see what you really want and need.

What types of measurable changes or breakthroughs do your clients typically experience?

• The ability to stay present for more and more of their lives.

• To have challenging conversations with their romantic partners.

• To have a meltdown and then recover, without going into a shame spiral.

• Sometimes to accommodate their needs in enough time that the meltdown doesn’t even happen!

• Going from almost constant self-loathing and thoughts of escape (divorce, suicide, quitting their job) to living a life that feels manageable, and even sometimes fun.

It’s basically the coolest job in the world for me to get to witness this stuff! My clients are my absolute heroes; they inspire me daily. As hard as the stuff we talk about is, we spend a surprising amount of time laughing!

Who is your ideal client and how do they know they’re ready to work with you?

I’m kind of the coach of last resort for a lot of people. My clients tend to be “professional” clients, or experts at going to therapy. They’ve been in therapy and coaching for decades, and read every self-help book on the shelf. But when they start to get neurocurious and wonder if they might be Autistic or ADHD, they crave something different. They want to stop trying to get better at living a life that doesn’t fit, and instead custom-build one that does. They’re ready to work with me if they’re willing to practice accepting themselves exactly as they are, even if they don’t understand how to do that yet.

If someone is feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or “burnt out” as a neurodivergent adult, what is the one action you want them to take right now?

It’s kind of a thought experiment. I know this is crazy, but I want you to close your eyes and just imagine that whatever you’re going through, it’s ok to be who and how you are, and nothing needs to change about you. If you think about it like a math problem, stop making yourself the variable you’re solving for. Let yourself be the known quantity that is what it is, and let your environment, systems, and ways of moving through the world be the variables you can change.

Then head over to Etsy and get yourself an ND Friendly Tarot deck, or go to our website and book a session with me or my business partner, Amy Noyes! We can’t wait to meet you.

Visit my website for more info!

Read more from Miranda Jane