Living with Intention – Learn to Slow Down
- Brainz Magazine
- 2 days ago
- 11 min read
Updated: 20 hours ago
Written by Johnna Key, Spiritual Guide & Teacher
Johnna Key is known for her calming and serene voice when guiding meditations. She is the author of the newly published book, Making Space to Breathe, and YouTube channel, Journeys with Johnna.
In our modern society, we are busy. In fact, this has become a favourite phrase, “I’m just so busy,” as if it were a badge of validation that one has somewhere to be. We use this to excuse ourselves from everything, such as meet-ups with friends or family, the reason why a phone call hasn’t been returned, or as deep as the fear of slowing down to be present.
It’s being used so often that it’s no longer valid.
Most of us are living this modern life. We all know how busy it can become when you allow it. Bubble buster, being busy isn’t a badge of validation, it’s avoidance of life and a deeper connection to those around you.
What does it mean to live with intention?
In a yoga class, an instructor will often begin a class by inviting the practicing yogis to welcome in an intention for the practice. In other words, if a yogi has come to class to calm a busy mind, then that would be their intention for the class, to welcome their mind to relax and land with their awareness in their body.
When we are open to the concept of living with intention, we are practicing heightened states of mindfulness and self-awareness. We are slowing down to be present with the moment. And even deeper, we are allowing the moment to be what it is, teachable, expansive, or eye-opening.
Living with intention is the flip side of the coin to goal setting
To live with intention would be a similar concept to goal setting. This concept works for many people. It gives the mind something to look forward to and the body, mind, and spirit something to work towards. Goal setting can often materialize something in the tangible, to go on a trip, to buy a house, start a business, to be a minimalist, etc. Goal setting helps you get organized in your life and can often give you a sense of purpose.
Living with intention would be to choose how you feel in any given scenario. Choosing how you’re going to show up for you or for others, the energy you wish to put out in the world, or the legacy you wish to let linger after you're gone. In order to recognize these moments, you’ll need to slow down to be present. When you’re present, you can then cultivate the discernment either in the moment or later to know how to respond.
Societal programming has us behaving in a way where we consume a lot. As tourists, we take as many photos, eat as much food, and go to as many sites as we can, all without stopping to consider the impact that millions of people touring has on the area. As eaters, we are content to eat what looks and tastes yummy without considering its origin story or the quality of the food. As exercisers, we focus so heavily on what the outward appearance is looking like that we don’t slow down to consider if the body movement that’s being performed is actually right for that specific body.
We are moving so fast, catching so many trends, and trying to keep up that we are missing the point of being here, the experience.
When we slow down to experience life, we can enjoy life and also be resilient to its ebbs and flows. Bonus, you can also regulate the nervous system when slowing down, causing the mind, body, and spirit to be at ease.
What could life look like if you lived with intention?
Living everyday life with intention would look different for everyone, but it would be more meaningful and content, perhaps feel more purposeful.
In Man’s Search for Meaning, Dr Viktor Frankl emphasizes how important it is for us to find that sense of purpose for a life fulfilled. That for us to discover our purpose and find that satisfying life, we must take responsibility for ourselves, for our actions, our words, our energy. We can then make space to live out our life's unique blueprint.
In Making Space to Breathe, my first published book, I also write about how important it is to take responsibility for oneself. When we do this, it becomes the moment we begin to shift. If I hadn’t slowed down my life to take responsibility for my role in being in partnerships with narcissists, then I’d still be in that victim role, hating my life, not doing anything about changing it.
When responsibility comes into play, everything else follows, gratitude, acceptance, joy, love, abundance, and so much more. What also flows is the ebb, anger, shame, embarrassment, resentment, and all other emotions that are being stored have to come up to come out.
For example, see yourself in a cafe having lunch with a friend. Neither of you is on your phone, but it sits face down next to your non-dominant hand. Your friend opens up about something they’re going through, right as your phone buzzes. What do you do if you’re living intentionally?
Your fingers twitch to grab the phone, Pavlov's dog response. If you’re rushing, then your brain is screaming at you to know right now what that notification was about, probably grabbing your phone for a seemingly innocent glance. The energy of the moment is broken as soon as the hand grabs the phone. Subconsciously, the friend shuts down, so when you look up and probe a little deeper, they don’t really respond. Conversation ends, subject changed.
I was in a cafe the other day and witnessed this exact scenario take place at the table next to me. A woman, Friend 1, is opening up to her friend about the struggles she’s having in her relationship. Friend 2, the listener, phone buzzes, she looks at her watch, then her phone. Friend 1 pauses. “Uh-huh,” Friend 2 absently replies, not listening but paying more attention to her device than the friend in physical presence. Friend 2 looks up to say, “Go on,” while the friend with the grievance replies, “I don’t know, it’s just frustrating.” Her train of thought was broken, her words caught in her throat, so she spilled out a quick conclusion because frustration was what she was feeling in the moment. Is it frustration with the relationship or a subconscious frustration with being somewhat ignored during a vulnerable moment?
You’re living intentionally, though, so the above scenario would go differently. You are aware that your hand twitches for the phone, so you bring your hand to your water glass instead. You look at your friend, stay silent to let them know they have your attention, and they go on, the conversation continues, and you two make a connection.
Because you’re living with intention, you notice all of the above, while simultaneously noticing how powerful the pull of the device buzz can actually be.
How to live with intention
Can I say step A through Z is to slow down? But for real, slow your roll.
We can use the terminology living with intention in place of where we’ve used mindfulness. Living with intention is a deeper way of being mindful. You want to live with your intention, to walk your talk.
In my life, following the toxic relationships I was in, which felt like chaos to my nervous system, my mind and body reacted for years in a way that was pure panic.
When I began living with intention, my intention was simple, peace. I wanted to find peace and safety within my mind and body, letting my nervous system heal and become more resilient. In the last decade, this has been the source behind most of my life's choices for myself, in addition to how I wanted to present myself to the world.
I wanted to be at peace. I am peace. My intention has become my superpower.
While living in Bali, I discussed living with intention with one of my Balinese friends quite often. She was a mother of two, we’re the same age, and both loved traveling the world. Her intention in life was to be a wise mentor and teacher to her two toddlers. She felt honored and grateful that their souls chose her to be their mother. Everything she did was to honor her newfound purpose as a mom.
Your intention will come from your experiences or where you want to go in the world. It will one day, in time, with patience and persistence, carry you to your purpose-filled life, if that’s your goal.
Sometimes your intention will change. Be willing to slow down over and over again to take time to see your intention and let it materialize. If you’re rushing around from work to event to distraction, then you’re not giving enough space for that intention to come through.
Slow down.
It’s edging into winter as I write this article, the perfect time to slow down and reduce your calendar. Be real with yourself and your limitations, and make time for your intention.
Setting your intention
Intention setting can feel overwhelming when there’s pressure. I’d encourage you to do what you can to take the pressure and stress off, resist the urge to push or force yourself. Give it space to develop over time and come in naturally.
The first step to creating intentions is usually found with a lot of questioning yourself and lots of patience.
Ask the question(s), then make time and space for the answer. Sometimes the answer arrives weeks, months, or even years later. Chill and let it come in. If you feel like the answer is taking too long, then slow down some more and ask the question(s) again.
A simple and achievable place to start is, “How do I want to feel today, in {fill in the blank} scenario?” Be specific on how these scenarios cause you to feel, identify those feelings, and ask more questions.
Sometimes it comes through the process of elimination, write down the way you don’t want to feel and work backward from there. Choose one and go with it. It doesn’t have to be complicated.
There are times when I am feeling run-down or do not want to interact with people. I notice individuals out in the wild, when they feel this way, they’re short and snappy. I too used to do this. No one appreciates this behavior, so I didn’t want to do that anymore. On a day I’m not in the best mood, I acknowledge that I am in a bad mood, tired, etc., yet I need to run some errands or make a call. I will intend my attitude and how I want to feel doing the things that need to get done.
The second step is to create your intention using one of two ways, working backward or going off the intuition of what immediately comes up.
For example, working backward, I don’t want to be unkind or snappy because that makes me feel like a jerk. I also don’t want to be the individual who puts out lower energies, causing others to also react or have a bad day. I want to be kind, not fake polite. Working from this intention, I will monitor my tone of voice, energy level, music or podcast I listen to while driving, and of course, my thoughts. I’ll be kind to myself first, which makes it easier to be kind to others next.
An example of going with your intuition, sitting quietly, and asking the question, “How can I live with intention today?” Sometimes the answer will fly into your head, other times, you’ll need to write out the thoughts in your mind to get to the intention. So grab a journal.
Journaling is my favourite way to get to an intention that wants to come through. You can use your electronic devices, pen and paper, or voice notes to get the thoughts out. We pick up so much energy from the outside world that we need time to process what the mind and body are registering in the background of the subconscious. Get those initial thoughts out of your mind to make space for the intention to pop through.
The follow-through
Following through is one of the hardest things we face as a human species. Hence, why we have the phrase, “It was done with good intentions.” Many times, we have good intentions, yet we get lost in how we’re executing them.
Are you following through with your word? Are you slowing down to be present?
I was raised in Texas by war veterans and cowboys, and one of the biggest lessons I learned from the men of my family was, “You have nothing if you don’t have your word.” It was drilled into us as children that when you speak, you speak with clarity and confidence, and you follow through with any promises made. If you cannot follow through, communicate as much and change directions. This philosophy is part of old Texas, not much of this exists today, unfortunately. It’s one of our better lessons and ways of being as Texans that I wish could catch on again.
Instead, we’ve become a culture of ghosting and “I don’t owe them anything,” a.k.a disrespectful behaviour to the extreme. If you cannot have difficult conversations to communicate change in a dynamic, then one has zero business being in said dynamic. I am, of course, not referring to abusive or dangerous situations, I’m referring to the everyday exchange with one another.
One problem that our society has is that we cannot commit to ourselves. Getting some people to commit is like pulling teeth, far more difficult than it needs to be.
If you attempt to commit to yourself yet don’t follow through with the commitment, then you build resentment and anger with yourself that eventually seeps out onto others. You start to see yourself and tell yourself that you have commitment issues, or are just not interested, or just not self-disciplined enough, creating the “I’m not enough” storyline in the mind and operating from this subconscious belief.
Following through is one of the hardest things we do, we tend to make it too complicated, put too much pressure, don’t leave room for grace, and think it can be rushed or forced along. If you can create a small intention that you feel confident you can achieve, you feel incredible.
You’re more likely to create bigger and bigger intentions, living a more fulfilled life with the small wins you’ve set up for yourself, leading to bigger wins.
Living with intention brings more connection
Why would you want to live with intention? It’s not easy work to practice mindfulness all day long, whether you're alone, at home, at work, or in public, it’s a practice, a way of being. Living with intention isn’t a quick-fix idea or even fast-paced. It’s a lifestyle choice, and a change, a commitment that you make to yourself every day.
Living with intention is what I believe to be one of the missing catalysts in our society. Living with intention causes you to be able to meet people where they are and to give others the individual need to be seen. Living with intention teaches you to love yourself more and the person you are in this moment, also the person that you wish to become.
Your intention and your energy matter.
It matters to you as an individual, to those you love or are surrounded by, to those in your community, and to those in the collective, each of our energies matters. If we want to connect more with others on a level that feels supportive and considerate, then those intentions have to begin with you.
Create your intention, then follow through with it in the world.
What you do matters. What you say matters. How you show up matters.
Take your energy and that of others more seriously, and you’ll notice the difference and the value in what each of us offers.
After reading this, can you conclude for yourself, “Are you living with intention already?” If not, are you ready to make the shift to a more present you? Enjoying the life you live and relishing the moments you’re here.
Read more from Johnna Key
Johnna Key, Spiritual Guide & Teacher
Johnna Key is a certified Yoga, Meditation guide, & Spiritual Teacher, leading others to calibrate their nervous system and ease overwhelm within the mind. Derived from her experience in the Western medicine system as a child and divorce from a narcissistic relationship as an adult, Johnna has learned and implemented tools to heal the mind, body, & spirit from traumatic experiences to exit karmic loops and generational patterns. Her passion is teaching others to find self-acceptance for their experiences and the emotions or perspectives that can surface. It's her passion to help others calm a busy mind, ease the tension in the body, and learn to meditate to find joy and self-worth in the journey we call life.
Resources:
Man’s Search for Meaning, Dr. Viktor Frankl
Making Space to Breathe by Johnna Key
Pavlov Dog Theory by Ivan Pavlov
