Is Joy the Missing Link in Your Wellness Journey and Why It Matters More Than You Think
- Brainz Magazine
- Oct 20
- 10 min read
Charlotte Phelps, Founder of The Alchemy of Being, transformed her life from a terminal prognosis into a mission to empower others. She offers tools and insights, born from her own journey, for personal growth and holistic health, helping individuals curate their unique 'Toolbelt for Life'.
We chase health, we chase growth, we chase change. But what if one of the most powerful medicines has been with us all along? Joy. For too long, joy has been treated as something optional, a reward you earn after the hard work is done. In reality, joy is one of the most profound forces for healing, resilience, and well-being. In this article, I’ll explore why joy is not frivolous but fundamental, how laughter and delight transform your brain and body, and how you can start treating joy as medicine in your everyday life.
Sedona by Sunrise from Hot Air Balloon, June 2023 – A moment of sheer awe, light, and the quietest joy
What do I mean by joy?
Joy isn’t the same as happiness. Happiness often depends on circumstances, a good day, a kind word, a win at work. Joy runs deeper. It can be sparked by small pleasures or big moments, but it also wells up from within, a sense of aliveness, connection, or meaning that isn’t dependent on everything going right.
In this article, when I talk about joy, I mean both the quick sparks of delight that lift your day and the soul-level joy that reminds you why you’re here.
Why joy isn’t frivolous
For many of us, joy has been pushed to the sidelines. We’re taught to value productivity, discipline, and sacrifice, while joy is treated as the icing on the cake, something extra, a nice-to-have if there’s time. But what if that perspective is completely backward?
Joy isn’t frivolous. It isn’t a distraction from the real work of life. It is the real work. Neuroscience shows us that joy is a biological necessity. It calms our nervous system, fuels creativity, strengthens relationships, and anchors resilience. Spiritually, joy is one of the clearest signs we are in alignment with ourselves and with life. Emotionally, joy is what makes all the effort of growth and healing worthwhile.
Without joy, even the most disciplined wellness routine can become a grind. Without joy, success feels empty. Without joy, health feels like survival, not thriving. Joy is what breathes life into all of it.
So let’s be bold here. At the end of the day, what is the purpose of life if it isn’t to be filled with joy? Not as a fleeting reward, but as a daily medicine that nourishes us, body and soul.
The neuroscience of joy and laughter
We often think of joy as just a feeling, nice when it happens, but not something we can rely on. Yet neuroscience tells a very different story. Joy is one of the most powerful states we can experience, with measurable effects on the brain, body, and even our ability to grow.
When you laugh, your brain floods with dopamine, the chemical of motivation and reward. This isn’t just about feeling good in the moment. Dopamine strengthens neural pathways, making it easier to repeat behaviours that serve you. Laughter also releases oxytocin, often called the bonding hormone, which deepens feelings of connection and trust. This is why laughing with others feels so good and why shared joy creates stronger relationships. (As confirmed by research by Dunbar et al., 2017, University of Oxford).
At the same time, laughter lowers the body’s levels of cortisol, our primary stress hormone. High cortisol keeps us in survival mode - alert, tense, and on edge. When laughter lowers cortisol, it signals safety to the nervous system, opening the door to rest, repair, and creativity. (See for example Hasan & Hasan, 2009).
Research also shows that joy activates the parasympathetic nervous system, the body’s rest and digest mode. This doesn’t just calm you down, it allows your immune system to strengthen, your digestion to regulate, and your heart rate and blood pressure to return to balance. Put simply, joy restores.
And here’s something I love. Joy also drives neuroplasticity, your brain’s ability to change. When you experience joy, your brain is more willing to make new connections and rewire itself. (Supported by studies such as Hanson & Mendius, 2010).
This is why moments of laughter and play can make it easier to learn, to heal, and to create lasting change. Joy is not a distraction from the serious work of wellness. It’s the biological fuel that makes all the other work stick.
Different kinds of joy from surface to soul
Not all joy feels the same, and that’s exactly as it should be. Some joy is light, circumstantial, tied to a moment or a setting. Other joy is deep, spiritual, and woven into who we are. Both matter, but it’s helpful to recognise the difference.
Circumstantial joy is often sensory and situational. It’s the simple delight of soaking in a bubble bath with a gin and tonic and not being interrupted for twenty minutes. It’s the freedom of dancing at a party, or the quiet pleasure of a favourite meal shared with friends. These joys might not last forever, but they restore us in the moment. They are the pauses, the treats, the little sparks that lift a day.
But beneath those lighter sparks lies deep inner joy, the kind that doesn’t depend on circumstances. This is the joy that arises from within, a sense of aliveness, peace, or purpose that fills you no matter what’s happening around you. It might arrive when you’re fully present in nature, when you create something meaningful, when you serve or connect, or when gratitude swells unexpectedly in your chest. Unlike circumstantial joy, this deeper joy doesn’t fade the moment the bath water cools or the music stops. It stays. It sustains.
Both kinds of joy belong in your wellness toolbelt. Circumstantial joy gives you accessible, everyday ways to lighten your load and shift your state. Deep joy roots you, reminds you who you are, and connects you to something larger than yourself. Together, they form a balance. One keeps life buoyant, the other gives it depth.
The real art lies in noticing which kind of joy you’re experiencing and making space for both. When you can weave quick hits of circumstantial joy into the fabric of your days, while also cultivating the practices that unlock soul-level joy, you create a life that isn’t just functional, but truly fulfilling.
Personal rituals: My daily joy practices
For me, joy isn’t something I leave to chance. I make sure I build it into my day because I know it’s the difference between simply getting through life and actually living it.
One of my non-negotiables is to laugh every day. If the morning has been stressful, I’ll deliberately reset at lunchtime. Back when I worked in banking, that often meant watching a Michael McIntyre clip on YouTube. I find him hilarious, and within minutes I’d be laughing out loud at my desk. That laughter gave me the release I needed to go back to work with a lighter heart.
I also make space for the simple, everyday joys, the simple, sensory experiences that bring me peace and delight. Like playing fetch with my dog or lying in a warm bubble bath by candlelight. It’s breathing in sea air or simply standing still in awe at something beautiful. Some of my most treasured moments have been just that, looking out over the Grand Canyon in Arizona, standing before a majestic Icelandic waterfall, or watching the Northern Lights dance across the Arctic sky. These moments remind me of the sheer wonder of being alive.
Skogafoss Waterfall, Iceland, October 2022. Moments like these remind me of the sheer wonder of being alive.
But joy for me also runs deeper than these moments. My real soul joy comes from purpose. Creating the alchemy of being isn’t just about writing or teaching, it’s about sharing something that can help people. When someone tells me that an article I wrote or a verse I shared touched them or gave them hope, that is joy at its deepest level. That sense of contribution, of being part of something greater, fills me with a satisfaction that nothing else can match.
Music is another daily doorway into joy. I keep a playlist called Bring Your Soul Joy on Spotify and Apple Music, packed with the songs that make me dance around the room or sing at the top of my lungs. It’s my go-to when I need an instant lift, and it never fails.
And then there’s the practice of capturing beauty. Whenever I notice something truly beautiful, a picture, a view, or a fleeting moment, I take a mental snapshot. I hold it in my mind’s eye so I can return to it later. In difficult times, recalling those images reminds me that in a world that can offer such beauty, anything is possible. It gives me hope.
These small daily rituals, laughter, play, awe, music, and purpose form the backbone of my joy practice. They’re not luxuries, they’re lifelines. And the more I make space for them, the more I notice how joy transforms not just my day but my life.
If you’d like to explore how joy can become part of your own well-being toolkit, visit The Alchemy of Being’s Wellness Wiki for inspiration, tools, and joyful practices to try.
Joy as a resilience builder
We often talk about resilience as if it’s something forged only in struggle, a muscle strengthened by hardship and endurance. But neuroscience and lived experience both tell us that resilience is also built in joy. Every time we allow ourselves to laugh, play, or savour delight, we’re not just enjoying a fleeting moment, we’re wiring resilience into our nervous system.
Here’s why. Joy creates nervous system safety. When you laugh, sing, or dance, your body shifts out of survival mode and into expansion. Your parasympathetic nervous system signals, “It’s safe here,” and your system starts to regulate. This is more than just calm, it’s the foundation that allows you to face stress, adapt, and recover.
Think of it this way. Resilience isn’t built by avoiding life’s challenges. It’s built by teaching your body and mind what thriving feels like so that when stress inevitably comes, you know the way back. Joy is the map.
Moments of laughter and delight also act as emotional resets. They give the brain and body reference points of lightness, which make it easier to recover when times are hard. In fact, studies have shown that people who regularly experience joy and humour bounce back more quickly from adversity, not because the challenges are smaller, but because their systems are more flexible. A life peppered with joy becomes a nervous system that can bend, adapt, and recover.
I’ve seen this play out in my own life. Four and a half years ago, I lost everything in a massive crypto fraud. Yet, after only a couple of days of feeling utterly wretched, I was moving into action: contacting HMRC, setting up a debt management plan, and working with the bank. People were shocked at how quickly I sorted things out and got back to living. But for me, it was the natural extension of a nervous system trained by joy to reset, find centre, and keep going.
So the next time you find yourself laughing with friends, lost in a hobby you love, or simply smiling at something silly, remind yourself, this is not frivolous. This is resilience training.
How to curate your joy toolbelt
Like any other part of well-being, joy isn’t one-size-fits-all. What makes one person laugh might leave another unmoved. What feels nourishing for you today might not be what you need next month. The key is to curate your own collection of joy practices, your personal joy toolbelt, so you always have something to reach for when life feels heavy.
Here are a few ways to start:
Make a joy list: Write down ten things that make you smile, laugh, or feel lighter. Keep it somewhere handy so that on tough days, you can pick one and do it immediately. It can be as small as listening to a favourite song or as big as booking a spontaneous trip.
Schedule joy breaks: Don’t leave joy to chance. Put it in your diary. Whether it’s a weekly comedy night, a daily walk in nature, or ten minutes with your Bring Your Soul Joy playlist, treat joy as non-negotiable self-care.
Capture and revisit beauty: Take photos, mental snapshots, or journal entries of things that lift your spirit, a landscape, a piece of art, a child’s laughter. When life feels flat, revisit them as reminders that joy is never far away.
Mix surface and soul joy: Balance quick, circumstantial joys, like a bubble bath, music, or a good laugh, with deeper soul joys, like purpose, connection, creativity, and contribution. Both have their place, and together they create a full spectrum of resilience.
Share joy: Joy multiplies when it’s shared. Send that funny video or meme to a friend, dance with your kids, or invite someone to join you in a joyful ritual. Co-created joy not only lifts you but also strengthens your relationships.
Hold it lightly: Remember, joy doesn’t have to be perfect or profound. Even a two-minute laugh break can shift your chemistry. The more lightly you hold it, the more often you’ll notice it.
Curating your joy toolbelt isn’t about forcing yourself to be happy all the time. It’s about giving yourself options. It’s about remembering that joy can be chosen, practised, and strengthened. The more you weave it into your days, the more natural it becomes, until joy is not an occasional visitor but a familiar friend.
Need some ideas? Here are two for you. Why not try Laughter Yoga or even our 30-Day Laughter Challenge, both designed to help you rewire your brain and body through intentional joy.
Conclusion: The bold reminder
At the end of the day, what is the purpose of life if it’s not to be filled with joy? Not the fleeting kind that comes only from circumstances, but the deep, soul-level joy that lights you up from the inside and reminds you what it means to be alive.
Joy is not a side effect of wellness. It is wellness. It is the evidence that we’re not just surviving but thriving. And the beauty is that it doesn’t take a grand event or a perfect life to find it. It can be as simple as laughing at a silly video on your lunch break, dancing in the kitchen to your favourite song, or feeling the warmth of connection in a shared smile.
So don’t wait for joy to just happen. Curate it. Make space for it. Treat it as the vital medicine it is.
Because when you choose joy, you’re not only lifting your mood for the moment, you’re rewiring your brain, strengthening your resilience, and aligning with the very purpose of life itself.
Northern Lights, December 2024, near Tromso, Norway. A reminder that joy connects us to something vast and beautiful.
The question I’ll leave you with is this. What’s one small act of joy you can bring into your day today?
Because joy isn’t a luxury. It’s the cure.
Read more from Charlotte Phelps
Charlotte Phelps, Founder of The Alchemy of Being
Charlotte Phelps's life took a pivotal turn at 33 when she was given just six weeks to live due to a likely bowel perforation. This diagnosis came after a decade of being told she was fine by the medical world, making it both validating and shocking. Forced to explore unconventional options to survive, Charlotte not only regained her health but also underwent a transformative journey of soul, mind, and body. She also developed a profound need to understand how she had lived, which sparked a decade-long exploration of holistic practices and alternative approaches. This journey ignited a deep passion to share what she’d discovered with others, leading to the creation of The Alchemy of Being.
