How to Win the Game of Life
- Brainz Magazine
- Aug 22, 2025
- 6 min read
Sheun David Onamusi is a respected and inspiring healthcare collaborator, entrepreneur, and mind coach. He is the founder of Efra Wellbeing, a wellbeing startup, and Still Dapper UK, a bespoke leather goods company. An award-winning author, mentor, and part-time communications advisor to emerging leaders.
In today's world, it is easy to be overwhelmed by many choices and the inescapable noise of day-to-day life. This can lead many of us to spend years pursuing careers or life paths that do not align with our true desires, and never ask ourselves the crucial question: "Am I living on my terms, or am I playing someone else's game of life?" While falling behind in life may be manageable, advancing rapidly in the wrong direction can have far more serious consequences.
To experience lasting success, one needs to consistently move in the right direction. The longer you stay on this right path, the more the chances of victories when you play the game of life. By "Game," I mean your purpose; an unwavering sense of meaning that goes beyond mere ambition, recognition, or fame.
This article distils the core principles from my first book, "Knowing Your Game," and provides a clear roadmap for those who are fed up with just getting by and are ready to embrace a fuller, more vibrant life.
First: Start with spiritual clarity before strategic planning
Before you embark on your next life plan or craft your goals on a vision board, take a moment to pause and deeply reflect on the question: "What does achieving this goal mean to me beyond just material gains?" It's essential to delve into the emotional and spiritual significance behind your goals. The more immaterial and profound the outcome of your goal, the greater the sense of spiritual fulfilment you will experience once it comes to fruition.
Please understand my point here; strategic clarity is undoubtedly essential as you navigate your path to success. However, it is spiritual clarity that sustains your sense of purpose and fulfilment in the long run, protecting you from the emptiness that can creep in when the euphoric rush fades after achieving your goals.
In a world that constantly celebrates action, hustle, and tangible progress, often glorifying financial success and public recognition, it becomes all too easy to chase after accolades without considering what truly enriches your life and character.
To foster a deeper connection with your goals, strive for an alignment between your aspirations and your inner values. Don't just consider what you wish to attain, but who you want to become in the process. Your goals should be a pathway to personal growth, not merely stepping stones to wealth or status.
Cultivating spiritual clarity involves understanding your core beliefs, values, and desires, and allowing those to guide your ambitions. This journey begins from within, starting by sitting in a quiet space and writing down your personal beliefs and philosophies. After you have engaged in reflective dialogue, invite a higher power to guide you before establishing specific goals or destinations.
Own your game without apology
In our fast-paced world, it's also easy to be tempted by shortcuts and quick fixes that promise success, pulling you into roles scripted by others, be it parents, peers, or social media influencers.
Everywhere you look, there are voices eager to map out your path to success: caring parents with their advice, enthusiastic friends sharing their ideas, mentors championing traditional routes, and the insatiable stream of curated highlights flooding your social media.
While all of these perspectives sometimes come from a place of care, it's important to remember that your purpose is a personal journey. It's not dictated by a consensus but by your own convictions. Owning your journey means embracing the unique path that's right for you, even if it invites misunderstanding.
It's about seeking genuine fulfilment over fleeting recognition and prioritising meaningful impact above surface-level validation. Ask yourself: "If my efforts went unnoticed, would I still be passionate about pursuing this?" If your heart enthusiastically responds "yes," you're on an incredible path, crafting a journey that is genuinely yours.
Move from having knowledge to experiencing "knowing"
The key concept presented in my first publication, "Knowing Your Game," is the distinction between knowledge and knowing. Knowledge is primarily a mental construct; it encompasses facts and information that can be learned and memorised. In contrast, knowing is an experiential understanding that goes beyond mere information, bordering on a spiritual dimension.
To illustrate this difference, consider an example involving space travel. Individuals who have never been to space possess only knowledge about it, based on what they have read or seen. In contrast, an astronaut, having physically experienced space, maintains a deeper level of understanding, which can be described as a "knowing." This experiential insight enhances their knowledge, allowing them to speak on the subject with conviction and depth that cannot easily be challenged by someone with only theoretical knowledge, no matter how extensive.
While knowledge is intellectual and can be easily acquired through education, knowing is rooted in experience and personal conviction. Many people attend seminars, read books, and seek information, yet they may lead unfulfilled lives because their learning does not transform into deeper understanding.
When someone truly knows something, their behaviour reflects that understanding. They tend to navigate life with confidence rather than arrogance, and they embody direction rather than desperation.
Knowledge gives you information, but true knowing leads to profound transformation.
Partner with God: Don't just sit back and wait
There's a common belief that if something is meant to happen, it will automatically come to pass. This mindset often leaves many people passively waiting when they should be actively shaping their own destinies.
Neither God nor the universe intends to micromanage your life. Instead, they seek to partner with you. Just like in any meaningful business relationship, collaborating with a force greater than ourselves brings valuable wisdom, unfair advantage, and insights that come from the elusive "X" factor.
In this partnership, you must contribute your obedience, effort, and creativity. Unlike human collaborations, you are not just a piece on the chessboard; you have a role as a co-creator with the Divine.
Pray, absolutely, but don't stop there; plan as well. Listen attentively, but also make your move. Outline your vision. Chart your steps. Seek wise counsel, then take action. Remember, divine purpose is often revealed gradually, not all at once. Don't pause in your journey waiting for the entire blueprint to be laid out. Walk forward with what you know, and more will unfold as you go.
Keep playing even when you fail
After years of studying successful people, I now believe that success is not defined by the absence of failure; instead, it is characterised by the ability to rise after each setback. In life, encountering failure is a common occurrence, but the decision to give up is entirely up to the individual.
Many individuals abandon their goals after experiencing a single defeat, mistakenly believing that it is a definitive endpoint. However, experiencing loss can be an essential component of building a meaningful legacy, as pointed out in my first article (The Magic of Failure). It often provides valuable lessons, humility and skills that formal education may not impart.
Demonstrating resilience shows that you strongly believe in your aspiration, and if you stumble, focus on getting back up. If you're facing delays, use that time for reflection. The important point is to keep moving forward; standing still can be more detrimental than failure itself.
Final thoughts: Knowing is becoming
The distinction between those who achieve success and those who simply wish for it often lies in their understanding. When you truly understand the "game" you are playing in life, this knowledge influences your language, choices, social connections, and even your subconscious thoughts. You begin to embody your ambitions, leading you to ultimately fulfil them. At this point, you no longer just have a knowledge of the game; you have a "knowing" of it.
Having ambition is not sufficient; alignment with your purpose could be the "game changer" that skyrockets you. Authenticity rather than pretence, profound understanding rather than surface-level information sets apart the pro from the rookie in the game of life.
Embrace the journey of Knowing Your Game and allow it to serve as a reflection of your true potential and identity, guiding you toward becoming who you were truly meant to be.
A personal invitation to you
If you've read this and something in your heart stirred, then don't ignore it. You were not designed to drift. You were created to dominate, not people, but purpose.
Now is the time to pause and ask yourself honestly, "Am I playing my Game, or simply following the crowd?" If the answer leans toward uncertainty, this is your wake-up call.
Pick up your copy of "Knowing Your Game" and begin your personal transformation today. And if this message resonates, share it with someone who's on the edge of their next breakthrough idea.
Read more from Sheun David Onamusi
Sheun David Onamusi, Healthcare Collaborator, Entrepreneur, Mind Coach
Sheun David Onamusi is a thought leader in how the mind influences success in business and life. Graduating from his first degree with a lower second class, he struggled with imposter syndrome which led to a life changing experience in 2021. He has since dedicated his life to collaborating and helping others find purpose and relentlessly seek to change one life at a time. His mission: Shape life through words & actions.
