How to Stay With Your Habits
Updated: Apr 15
Written by Madeleine Daleng Nyland, CEO of MAD
Madeleine Daleng, a five‑time Norwegian figure skating champion, now empowers people through rehabilitation, obesity coaching, and fitness training, blending elite‑sport insight with a human, down‑to‑earth approach.
Sticking to new habits is often harder than it seems. While willpower plays a role, true change comes from understanding your motivations, setting clear goals, and finding support. This article explores how to make habits an integral part of your life without the pressure, focusing on long-term growth and balance.
Why habits are so hard to stick to
How many times have you promised yourself that this time you’ll stick to your new habits?
If you’re like most people, the answer is: more times than you can count. And yet, every time someone says, “It’s easy, just push through!”, something inside you tightens because you know it’s not that simple.
Real change isn’t about willpower alone. It’s not about being “strong enough” or “disciplined enough.”
It’s about understanding yourself, your motivation, and the life you actually live. Once you get that part right, habits stop feeling like a battle and start becoming part of who you are.
1. Why January feels easy, and April feels hard
January and February come with fresh-start energy. We’re mentally ready for change. We feel motivated. We want to do better.
But as the months pass, life returns to its usual rhythm. The excitement fades. And suddenly, the habits we were so committed to feel heavy again.
A new year is not a new life, it’s simply an extension of the old one. Goals matter, but they need structure and purpose to survive beyond the “New Year glow.”
2. Your why: The foundation of every habit
Your why is the anchor. It’s the reason you want this habit to become part of your life. And no, “because I want it” is not enough.
Your why should be rooted in:
What this habit will give you
How it will improve your life
What it means for you long-term (think 20 years, not 6 months)
Write your why down by hand. Keep it somewhere you can return to when motivation fades, because it will.
3. Your inner motivation: The engine
Inner motivation is the quiet, powerful force that keeps you going when things get tough. It sounds like:
“I want to feel stronger.”
“I want more energy for my kids.”
“I want to trust myself again.”
Without inner motivation, habits rarely last.
4. Your outer motivation: The support system
Let’s be honest: very few people rely only on inner motivation. Outer motivation can be:
A workout buddy
A coach
A challenge
A reward
A community
A schedule
Using external support isn’t cheating, it’s smart.
5. Don’t be too hard on yourself
Life is not meant to be lived inside strict routines. It’s healthy to:
Go to a party
Eat comfort food
Have a girls’ or boys’ night
Stay up late on a beautiful summer evening
Take a break
These moments don’t ruin your habits, they balance them.
6. What to do when you fall out of the system
Because you will. Everyone does. A day, a week, or even a whole vacation “off track” is not failure. It’s life. When you’re ready to return:
Go back to your why
Reconnect with your inner motivation
Start with one small action
Don’t punish yourself, redirect yourself
You haven’t lost progress. You’ve gained experiences.
7. Don’t make it absolute
The more restrictive the habit, the more likely it is to break. All-or-nothing thinking kills consistency. Instead:
Allow flexibility
Adjust when needed
Focus on progress, not perfection
Sustainable habits are built on balance, not rules.
The real secret to staying with your habits
Staying consistent with your habits isn’t about perfection, it’s about direction. It’s about knowing your why, understanding your motivation, giving yourself grace when life gets messy, and choosing to return to your path again and again.
You don’t need to start over every Monday. You don’t need to wait for a new year. You don’t need to be flawless. You simply need to keep choosing the version of you that you’re becoming, one small decision at a time.
Habits don’t shape you in one big moment. They shape you quietly, steadily, in the everyday choices you make.
And when you build them with kindness, clarity, and flexibility, they stop being something you chase, and start becoming something you live.
Read more from Madeleine Daleng Nyland
Madeleine Daleng Nyland, CEO of MAD
Madeleine Daleng is a five‑time Norwegian figure skating champion who now channels her competitive drive into helping people rebuild strength, confidence, and health. With a background from the Norwegian School of Sports Science, she works across rehabilitation, obesity coaching, and fitness training. Her approach blends elite‑athlete discipline with warmth, humor, and real‑life understanding. As the founder of MAD, she supports clients through personal training, group fitness, and long‑term lifestyle change. She also inspires a wider audience through her YouTube channel, Madeleinedaleng_goodvibes.
