Written by: Kaye Doran, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Have you ever felt stuck; like a car stuck in the mud spinning its wheels and not getting anywhere? Perhaps you aren’t yet aware that your wheels are spinning, and no movement is taking place.
Maybe you hate your job, and you know deep down that it is not a good fit for you, and you so desperately want to move on, however for some reason you don’t do anything about it. You start telling yourself stories to justify why you can’t create the change you so desperately want. The stories are generally around money, time, fearful of nothing better to go too, you have been there a long time or simply no time to look. The battle begins between your mind and your knowing. Your reasoning and your desire.
The problem is when you don’t act upon the change you seek, you betray yourself at the deepest level. You know you are backing down and this feeds into behaviours that help you mask the fact that you are not actioning what you know you need to. You are not creating the life that you want, need, and deserve. You are empowering the feeling of hopelessness, undeserving and not being good enough. You settle. This robs you of vitality and energy. You feel trapped by your own doing, yet project those trapped feelings onto situations or people around you. Your dreams are robbed by your inability to act.
This is when avoidance tactics start to take over. You binge watch tv, drink more than usual, continually pick up your phone to either call people or scroll through social media. You do whatever you can to drown out the voice that whispers to you regarding the change you really want and desperately attempt to not feel disappointed in yourself.
Here is what you need to know:
You are not alone in this pattern of behaviour. This can happen to anyone at any given point in time.
Stop avoiding and recognise that you are feeling stuck.
Acknowledge what your fears are.
Choose to stop being the passenger and get back into the driver’s seat.
Courage is what you need to tap back into. We have all had moments in life where we have been courageous, regardless of how small or how large your act of courage was, it is simply an act of courage. When you revisit that moment, it begins to reignite the feeling and result that went with it.
Here is how to re-ignite your courage: Ask yourself the power questions.
When was the last time I created change in the face of my fear?
What did I tell myself to get over my fear?
What did I do that created the change?
Did I achieve the change I desired?
How good did it feel when I achieved my desired result?
How many times have I been courageous in my life?
I have done it before, can I do it again?
The truth of it is a resounding yes. Of course, you can do it again if you have already been successful. Your history has left you clues!
Now, forgive yourself for getting stuck. It does not matter that you were momentarily stuck, even if it was a long moment. What matters is that you start to move. To move, you need to be clear on what you are moving towards.
If you are wanting a new job yet do not know exactly what job, do not let that deter you. All you need to do is create the recipe, in other words, get clear on your ingredients.
Here are a few things to consider:
Do you work better alone or as part of a team?
Do you like to sit at a desk or be out on the road?
Do you like to serve and support others?
Do you like the work to offer variety?
What kind of manager do you need?
What is the culture of the environment?
Do you seek growth opportunities?
Do you want to be your own boss?
How many days or hours a week do you want to work?
What is the income you receive?
You really need to become the architect and allow the Universe to be the builder.
Now here’s the thing. As you find the courage, get clear on what you want and start taking action, some fear will still remain. Simply buckle the fear into the passenger seat and start driving. With each movement forward, the fear will begin to quieten because you will become energised by being true to yourself. Simply take one step, then another and before you know it you will come face to face with your outcome.
You are now a courageous action taking change maker.
If you would like to accelerate your progress and want to know how I can support you, please visit my website to set up a time to discuss working together or get to know me by joining my weekly zoom meditation and insight group.
If you want more, please go to my website, under resources, you will find three powerful meditations as my gift to you. Or, if you would like to join a weekly zoom meditation and insight group, please reach out to me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn to find out more.
Kaye Doran, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Kaye Doran is an entrepreneur, facilitator, speaker, women’s leadership and life coach, shamanic healer, and creator of Inner Expressions, helping women realize their leadership from within. An unshakable optimist, she lives with a foot in both worlds – physical and spiritual, working with her unique blend of gifts in connection, knowing, shamanic energy sound healing, and accredited master life coaching. She empowers women with self-worth and the ability to create change. Supporting them to feel and know their inner power moving them beyond their comfort zone and back into the driver’s seat of their life. She has been working with women for three decades – and working on herself longer. Her motto is, “the power of change is in your hands.”
