Demanding Your 'Better Half' to Step Up Isn't Working – Exclusive Interview with Adrienne Beloin

Adrienne Beloin, psychotherapist and founder of Better Half, brings a bold and deeply human approach to modern relationships. In this executive interview, she reveals the power of relational intelligence, emotional literacy, and accountable partnership as the keys to personal evolution. Her work guides individuals, couples, and co-parents toward clarity, connection, and a legacy built on truth and growth.

Adrienne Beloin, Psychotherapist | Transformation Coach

What inspired you to create Better Half and dedicate your work to transformational coaching?

My private practice, Better Half, was born from my own mid-life reckoning–a perfect storm of professional burnout and personal breakdown, including a very public resignation, family crisis, and another failed relationship. For decades, I was the mission-driving leader, the wounded healer, tirelessly raging against systemic issues and pushing for accountability. I embodied compassion, empathy, and capacity; always charged on towards the light and away from my own shadows. Yet there I was, a 47-year-old, single mom depleted, unhinged, and self-abandoned. My new social responsibility needed to stay close to home and this inner work of becoming my own better half became my passion.

Founding Better Half was my locus: the chance to dedicate my resources back to myself and the practice of healing transformation. Now, I have the profound privilege of working in passionate co-evolution with my clients on their journey to wholehearted connection and Relational Intelligence. Together, we navigate all the high-stakes dynamics–dating, co-parenting, conscious partnering, intimacy, heartbreaks, and self-actualization–all while ensuring that we honor our authentic whole selves.

How does your background in psychotherapy influence your coaching approach today?

Coaching informed by psychotherapy fosters integrated and thriving humans. I’ve always been very solutions-focused, innovative, and holistic in my clinical approach. The work I have done in behavioral health has been to remove barriers to care for populations that are high-risk and high-need. I’m skillful at creatively engaging people in change work, creating safety where vulnerability can be practiced, and holding accountability to values and capacity. In psychotherapy, I work within the context of pathology and treatment. Coaching offers an unlimited path that takes often the same set of adversities and applies emotional intelligence to transcend. Both approaches confront shadows, work stages of change, and practice skills; however, coaching is the right fit for further deepening intimacy, negotiating conflict, and building a value-aligned legacy. Clients are in safe hands with a coach like myself, who can field crisis intervention, trauma, addiction recovery, and collaborative mental health care.

What are some of the most common relational challenges people face today, and how do you address them?

Many couples lose sight of their individual identities, treating the relationship as a single unit rather than a dynamic system requiring structured, dedicated time to address inherent differences. Polarity is fundamental to relational health: we are naturally drawn to contrasting skills and perspectives precisely because our deeper self seeks the challenge necessary for growth. The challenge is that most lack the relational framework to navigate the inevitable conflicts this polarity creates.

Sustainable partnership requires deep Emotional Literacy–the commitment to understanding yourself and your partner around key developmental dynamics:

• Attachment styles: How early experiences shape our current needs for intimacy and independence.

• Core wounds: Unmet needs that trigger reactive behaviors under stress.

• Social conditioning: The external scripts dictating how we "should" behave in relationships.

The ethical core of modern relationships is Empathy and Equity. When this core balance is disrupted, the inevitable reckoning manifests as exhaustion, resentment, and broken trust.

My coaching work involves holding a safe, non-judgmental space for clients to radically accept their current relational reality. The process focuses on:

1. Exploration: Understanding the internal and external forces (e.g., family history, external stress) that are driving their patterns.

2. Individual and Group Intervention: Using focused, skill-based interventions around self-accountability and emotional intelligence to hone key relational competencies.

3. Pattern Rewiring: We interrupt the deeply ingrained, hurtful old patterns and cultivate a new, intentional appreciation for what will serve your goals and values.

You often talk about relational intelligence–what does that mean, and why is it so vital?

Relational Intelligence is the active component of Emotional Maturity–the deep capacity to understand your internal world, the motivations of others, and the underlying dynamics of our shared relational environment. It is the art of cultivating deep connection while simultaneously preserving your true self and respecting the integrity of the person opposite you. Lacking this foundation leaves us unable to perceive emotional cues and needs, both externally and internally. The path to mastery involves developing profound self-awareness (the 'shadow' work) alongside high-impact relational strategies (the 'light' work). This integrated consciousness is what empowers an individual to sustain a conscious partnership–a connection built for honest growth and lasting success. My clients love that I wrestle with this myself and appreciate the pain and reward in personal growth and thriving relationships.

How do your creative virtual and live interventions differ from traditional coaching sessions?

I am obsessed with making growth accessible and dynamic. My whole coaching philosophy is shaped by working with highly resistant folks, which means I’ve perfected the art of high-impact, brief interventions that spark change without the heavy lift. I work at your speed, with a trauma-informed and clinically savvy approach, keeping the intimidation low and the relief high so you stay motivated to make change.

Want to move the needle? Sometimes, 15 minutes is all it takes. Need a major shift? A three-hour intensive can take you from confrontation to breakthrough repair. While my one-on-one sessions are affordable, I also offer an accessible $50 monthly membership with an unlimited messaging feature. Think of it as having me embedded in your personal journal: you can ‘brain dump’ your challenges, reflections, and insights, and I will respond with thoughtful, personalized guidance to build your Relational Intelligence as you flow the intel to me. My goal is always to customize the process and collaborate, ensuring the solution is effective, flexible, and perfectly tailored to get you unstuck.

What can new clients expect when they begin a coaching package with you?

When you step into my space, the number one priority is for you to feel truly seen and completely safe–like you've finally found the person who gets it. I’ve made it my mission to walk alongside a wild diversity of intimate truths, so you’ll find my approach to be completely non-judgmental and totally savvy about the real-world messiness of relationships. My clients understand that I’ve been there and appreciate that I can interpret what they are trying to express.

Our work is customized: sometimes the truth hits you with a moment of sobering clarity, and other times we’re laughing as we unpack the absurdity of the human condition. We integrate wellness, collaborate with other pros, and focus on your specific goals. Plus, I don't just see you once a week; I load you up with the best tools, resources, and inspiration to make real changes between sessions.

The arc of our time together is simple: You arrive with decompression, you move through a phase of real healing, and you leave with a profound, lasting transformation–deeper in connection with yourself, your partner, and the life you want to build.

Can you share a powerful transformation story that illustrates the impact of your work?

I am most proud of–though it sounds sadistic–the work I have done to help people end relationships that were not evolving.

I know, clinically and personally, that staying stuck in a cycle where one or both partners refuse to engage with change is a form of slow, devastating relational trauma. My approach in couples’ work is to hold the relationship as a precious, third entity and fight fiercely for its potential. I rapidly elevate confrontation to radical transparency, providing the necessary reckoning that clarifies where core values are misaligned or where the foundational requirements for equal partnership (e.g., trust, respect, shared goals) are simply untenable. When a partner finds the courage to walk away, it is not a failure of love; it is an act of preservation. The goal is always to exchange suffering for transformational growth, ensuring the path chosen–be it reconciliation or separation–is one that honors your peace, models secure boundaries for your children, and affirms the truth that, in the end, integrity always wins.

How do you help couples, singles, and co-parents navigate the conflict between masculine and feminine energy?

The interplay of Masculine and Feminine energetic principles–which exists in all people, regardless of gender identity or sexual orientation–is a key, universal driver in relationship dynamics. This polarity dictates how we process information, prioritize needs, and express emotions, leading to the common, default state of dysfunctional dance: one partner pursues or pushes, and the other withdraws or defends. The goal isn't to suggest gendered roles, but to achieve an evolved freedom: the radical acceptance and honoring of this natural, fluid balance within ourselves and our partner. This awareness is not merely 'spiritual' but a profound social equity game-changer, allowing partners to successfully divide and conquer as co-leaders and elevate one another's capacities. Without this consciousness, the relationship will be defined by friction; with it, you unlock the divine, expansive growth that maintains lasting, mutual attraction.

You’re passionate about health equity and systemic change–how does that mission shape your practice?

I demand equitable partnerships, shared power, and everyone's right to safety and health. Patriarchy is a public health crisis that is making modern hetero relationships impossible. For men, the restrictive ideology of "masculinity" is alienating them; it acts as an emotional straightjacket that disconnects them from their vulnerability and general ability to consider others outside of themselves. Conversely, for women, this system institutionalizes chronic stress through reduced autonomy, overfunctioning in caretaking, and disproportionately high rates of gender-based violence. Access to health care is limited by this structure, either because we are not considering things like menopause or because men feel they can’t ask for help.

In my practice, I frequently encounter the cultural standoff: women, tired of carrying the emotional load, are understandably demanding that men 'do the work,' which often lands as an intimidating, ominous decree. The truth is, genuine growth doesn't require intensive therapy or emotional deconstruction. I simplify it to this: Emotional Intelligence is a strength women have developed out of necessity and survival under the patriarchy, but it is a universal human skill, not a genetic trait. My role is to provide a non-judgmental consciousness of the underlying social scripts and unconscious attachment strategies that drive our needs. Vulnerability is a non-negotiable prerequisite for an equal partnership, effective parenting, and successful leadership. It’s time we treat this–not as a soft skill–but as a core competency that must be further integrated across education, health, and business to truly build systemic safety and connection.

What’s your vision for how cultivating relational intelligence can help build healthier communities?

Before private practice, my career was dedicated to public health crisis response. We have an epidemic of self-abandonment breaking communities down. Relational Intelligence isn't a theory; it's the master key to your capacity for growth, offering true freedom from the corrosive toxicity of shame, guilt, and contempt that destroy the self and relationships. This capacity-building demands skillfully facilitated, destigmatized, and communal practice spaces to incubate change. When the intimacy and parenting spaces prioritize this vulnerability training, the effects are systemic: it directly strengthens families, builds a culture of safety (the very definition of a secure attachment), and provides a profound, measurable boost to both psychological and physical health.

I offer a safe and candid space for this emotional intelligence capacity building. Dynamic individual and community growth interventions that tackle constructs like gender wars and provide the awareness and skills needed to change brave hearts and influence a culture.

Ready to join the Relational Intelligence revolution? Better Half is a platform to make both micro and macro impact. Looking for help or a collaboration? Connect with me here.

Follow me on Instagram and LinkedIn for more info!

Read more from Adrienne Beloin