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Choices & Us – Integrity, Self-Love, Authenticity – The Real You?

Written by: Helen Kagan, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.

 

I think it’s safe to say that Life can be quite chaotic, hectic, confusing, and overwhelming at times… Especially over the last few years, for sure. Were you questioning yourself about your Life? What’s happening and Why? How to live it now with Dignity & Integrity? Is it still possible? With stress coming at us left and right, living in a total distress most of the time, we can end up burned out, unable to sleep, not functioning well, we are angry, frustrated, unsatisfied, unfulfilled, and just completely drained.

woman standing next to art painting

Can we still love ourselves? Even regardless the circumstances? Who is that person – a ‘Real You’? Do you treat yourself with compassion? How to live your life with Integrity if the whole World’s going nuts? Can you still have empathy to others if you’re falling apart? Authenticity – what is it? A constant or a variable? Decide for yourself…


As I wrote about Authenticity in my newest Poem Series “Colorful YOU”

(a fragment)


AUTHENTICITY.

A complicated word with such a simple meaning –

Live in accord with Higher Self, in harmony with Inner Critic,

in balance with your World. Just be your truest Self.

I know it’s not easy.

I know ‒ it’s opposite to lies, untruthfulness, complicity –

It’s all about dignity, integrity, and the simplicity

Of being true. Of loving self and others

Embracing your reality with joy, vivacity, and colors.

Then what is difficult?

To take responsibility for the decisions and choices I make

despite my limitless ability to be creative,

To trust the Process, live on Purpose.

To be accountable and trustworthy.

Just diving in without fear. Just trusting the Divine, You

just being thankful for the Life you’ve got. Just being true.

And gratefully continue on your sacred Journey of

Sincerity, Integrity, Humility, Simplicity –

AUTHENTICITY.


What can stop us being Authentic and living our life with Integrity?


As we already know, “negative beliefs” are those blocks that your subconscious mind puts there to “protect” you from happiness, abundance, joy, health, wellbeing – you name it! These beliefs need to be intentionally worked on to be released (eliminated) from all your systems as THEY ARE TOXIC. Examples could be your beliefs that “you are not good enough”; that “you are not worthy of” (money, happiness, love, etc.); that you can never be able/capable to do abc…; that you will never find xyz (love, relationship, good job, etc.); and many other limiting beliefs that poison your mind and therefore affect all aspects of your life.


Let’s examine these 4 types of Negative Blocks (limiting beliefs) that are affecting our lives (subconsciously) – i.e. without us having any awareness of it.

  1. Environmental ‒ people, places, things. Come from your childhood, family, society, politics, news, etc. You are affected/influenced by them more than you can possibly see (especially if you’re not paying attention to it).

  2. Psycho-somatic. You don’t know how each event in your life did or can affect you, how long your reaction could last, and how you process it, how much new trauma it can bring and/or how much past traumas were triggered by it. For instance, the relatively simple notions in your childhood ‒ “I am invisible; I’m unlovable; I’m not good enough, etc.” can become a dominant negative vibration which colors the whole life of this person.

  3. Generational. Come from parents, grandparents, parental figures, caregivers, and perhaps, even our own past lives. If you believe in Spiritual Laws and/or reincarnation ‒ we might have been given these “blocks” to live through them, to experience them, re-live and release forever.

  4. Spiritual gifts – can block our lives and become one of the most difficult to remove limiting beliefs as the majority of people can’t even understand and/or relate to us (as to too advanced or evolved). We begin to lose friends, even our own family don’t understand us. These can be a blessing and a curse.

Why are we better off if we embrace a concept of “Self-Love”?


See, I am not talking about ‘narcissists’ here. Nor I am talking about egocentric, selfish, full of themselves, self-centered people who believe they are ‘a center of the Universe’ and thus everything belongs to them – your ideas, feelings, money, even your life. I am exploring here a concept of “Self-Love” from a perspective of Integrity & Authenticity.


I’ve been learning that we can’t feel worthy of anything without first embracing a very basic concept of “Self-Love” (which is not easy for many!). You most likely heard that no one (including your family members, your significant others, the Universe, God, Angels, and all possible Sources you believe in) can love you more than you love yourself. You probably heard that you can only receive from any outside Source what you’re allowing to give yourself from your inside Source ‒ i.e., receive from yourself. Does it sound strange? And how do we know what Self-Love is if we might’ve never experienced it?


I will define Self-Love as an unconditional experience of love for yourself no matter who and what you are, do or have, what’s going on with you and/or around you or in the World. You just love Yourself, and that’s the whole meaning of it. It doesn’t depend on you being smart or not smart, pretty or not pretty, talented or not, loving and caring or not, etc. It doesn’t depend on you being something or anything. It is about an unconditional acceptance of yourself. It’s true that it is not always easy to remember to put “your own oxygen mask first”, but this is exactly the main principle of Self-Love which will allow us to provide help and serve others in need.


Integrity. Can we still have it when “the world’s falling apart”?


What is Integrity? And why it is so important in our lives?


Integrity is about living in accordance with your values, beliefs, morals, and principles, even when it seems hard or impossible (read again a fragment of my Poem above :). BTW, this entire, very powerful, Poem will be published in the Book “The Keys For Authenticity” in co-authorship with Jack Canfield, Summer 2023.

I consider Integrity is not something we try to achieve; it is rather what we consciously choose. It is about our everyday CHOICE. So… choose wisely!


When we live with integrity, we become reliable and people can trust our word; we have a good reputation, we become just generally better and happier – in our relationships with others and with ourselves. We become trustworthy. People trust us and have trust in us. This is paramount. Can we see if we live with integrity or not?


This very simple 4-step formula (D.A.S.A.) can help you identify your “Integrity vault”:

  1. Define your values and beliefs. It’s easier to stand for what’s right if you know what you stand for.

  2. Act with the right intention. How do we know what’s right? ‒ see 1). Make conscious choices for your career, relationships, and life in general

  3. Strive to be honest with yourself & others – it’s a conscious decision we make daily.

  4. Assert your needs and opinions. Stand up for yourself & others especially when you believe it’s right. What’s right? – see 1).

I was examining my own values, beliefs, and my Integrity vault, and realized that I want to add one more, a rather non-linear, variable to the above formula.


I feel that NOW is a critical time for many of us to shift. To shift from fear – to love, from surviving – to thriving, despair – to happiness, illness – to wellness, from war – to peace. For instance, my HealingArts – is the creative foundation for my own shift to Love, Light & Gratitude. What’s yours?


I was so happy when several years ago I first came up with an idea of creating a “vehicle” for my HealingArts to be “transported” to people who can’t afford an original artworks but will be easily able to purchase a beautiful designer garment or a colorful household item – anything form my HealingArts Collections that contains high-vibrational healing energies so needed in our turbulent times. Even a simple yet a designer T-shirt, a baseball cap, a jacket, a dress, a household item – towels, glasses, blankets, pillows – just any item you need is having my HealingArts high vibrational frequencies embedded in all of them! It felt very authentic to me that I can continue to create my unique art with a healing intention, and that more and more people all over the world could benefit from having my unique colorful art in their environment in a way of “wearables” to put a smile in your heart!


My Big Dream, Vision and Mission is to deliver my WearableHealingArts® to Healthcare and Hospitality markets to promote healing and enhance wellbeing. I envision “hospital-wear” and “hotel-wear” made from my HealingArts artworks, will serve as a healing agent to every facility, patient, client, staff, visitor, just everyone who will experience the positive impact of my HealingArts™ in real time, and on on-going basis. Not only as artworks on the walls, but as wearable art - sheets, pillows, curtains, blankets, robes, scrubs, uniforms, etc. etc. And... I can guarantee that every person wearing my unique designer garment, or having various products with my healing art on them, will simultaneously enhance their well-being as every item is not only aesthetically appealing due to beautiful colors and fancy designs, but most importantly, carries the healing properties from the original HealingArts™ works.

Authenticity 24/7, or are we going in-and-out from our “Authenticity Zone”?


In a powerful Book on “’Authenticity Keys” I am co-authoring with famous Jack Canfield (which will be published Summer 2023) one of the questions I am pondering on is ‒ “Can we be completely authentic 24/7? Or do we create a special “Authenticity Zone” we go to every time we connect with our Higher Self?

I know for me is that when I live from higher-vibrational frequencies of Love and Light, I feel ‘connected’ and authentic. I can speculate that when you’re connected with your multi-dimensional Higher Self, you inevitably become authentic. But can we do it 24/7? Or do we go in-and-out of this magical zone? It was an important realization for me that sometimes we are inauthentic. It doesn't necessarily mean that when you’re out of your ‘Authenticity Zone’ you are bad, or you do something you later regret, or you will make some major mistakes. Well… first, I believe there are no mistakes – just Lessons we have to learn from, and Choices we make that are not congruent with our Authentic Self. Authenticity means being true to yourself, right? But since we’re constantly changing, I can define “being authentic” is when I’m connected with my Higher Self in that “authenticity zone” from which we just have to go in-and-out, because it is simply impossible to be there 24/7. Or is it possible?


When I am creating, I know exactly when I am in my creative Zone, I know exactly how it feels when I am there. I can experience wonderful, meditative, exciting, happy, quiet, and other states at the same time because when I am ‘in a Zone’ with high-vibrational frequencies – I am 100% authentic, i.e., I AM connected to the Universal Wisdom and Creativity. I invite you all to experience this magical phenomenon ‘being in a zone’, even if it doesn't happen for 24/7, it's still wonderful!

If somebody told me how difficult my Journey will be, would I still do it?


I will use here my own example of “being an Artist” as I believe a lot of people will relate (both, “creatives” and “normal” ones :). I’ll try to convey a message that it is still possible (though quite difficult) to maintain your Integrity & Authenticity while the circumstances do not necessarily support you on your Journey. When you feel crashed, hopeless, or even completely falling apart… Yes, I do believe it is possible to “raise out of ashes” and start anew. Never easy. Can be devastating. But I’ve done it many times. So can you.


One might think that being a freelance “full time artist” entails some sort of a luxurious lifestyle, like similar to what you can see in the movies :) Well… Let me tell you that first of all, a “creative process” is not an easy thing. First – you must allow yourself to be creative. Give yourself time. MAKE time (even if you don’t have it at all), and let yourself get into this magic “creative Zone” where all the miracles happen… Where there’s no “writer’s blocks, “blank canvas” blocks, and any other blocks we make ourselves to self-sabotage… Just allow that sacred Connection with the Divine and start to blissfully create. Really, this is it! But if you ask me – how does your workday look like? I’d say – usually quite crazy. That’s another story, and… another reality.


The question is – is it possible to integrate and manage these opposite realities? Those who are familiar with various intricacies of a creative process of any nature, those who know closely what it is, will agree with me. So… my “workday” might look like a regular “working day” for most folks who work like 9-6 schedule, and then work another job on top of that for a few more hours :). Or my “work day” might become totally crazy with a lot of actual painting time and lots of “processing and conceptualizing” time in-between which would result in like 25H day… And then there’s a huge chunk of time going to other (yet important) stuff like creating advertising materials, ordering, producing, and hand embellishing giclees, making prints, taking good photographs, endlessly improving previously worked on images of your art, writing articles, even books (!), press releases, creating and managing websites (plural), and of course, making arrangements for shows and exhibitions, inviting guests and collectors, creating mailing lists, doing emails blasts, and all that other “marketing jargon” which I have very low tolerance to…, then actually curating, providing and facilitating your own Shows, packing, shipping and handling your art, transporting yourself AND your art pieces to and from those Shows and Exhibitions, producing all possible marketing materials, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.


Well… you can see that even reading about this can make you feel overwhelmed, right? It does make me feel overwhelmed, for sure! :) I think the actual time I spend painting, i.e. creating, being in my “creative Zone” ‒ is only about 20-25%, if I’m lucky to have this time. Other 75-80% goes to everything else around your art career – of course if you treat it as a career vs. hobby. And it is very sad for me. I’d rather spend 75-80% of my time creating my unique art – because this is what I do best. But I do understand that other things I described above are just a “necessary evil” which I have to accept, and even love, because without loving it I’ll not be authentic. So, you can see that developing my concept & brand HealingArts™, my newest unique venue & brand Wearable HealingArts®, AND squeezing time in-between to actually CREATE (what I love the most) ‒ my actual unique artworks, write poems, play music, author books, etc. – is of course, a double or rather a triple full-time career! :) Which I won’t change for anything else as I feel authentic doing what I love and living my life with integrity.


And… if I knew what I was putting myself into… – I think I’d still do that :)


My Higher Self would still drag me to this place where I’m allowing myself to have joy creating. Where I am 100 % authentic. Where I feel Home. That “sacred place” where the most important things when we are starting anew (of course, after changing our “old stories”) – become Light, Love, Gratitude, Integrity, Authenticity.


The Real Us. What are we learning?


I believe everyone at this point most likely asked themselves about those grand lessons we’re given as humanity. Big existential questions like WHO AM I? WHY I AM here? WHAT I am here FOR? What is my MISSION? Do I have a VISION, what is my PURPOSE? What I find helpful in finding answers to these “BIG questions” are the following basic spiritual principles (regardless any of your religious beliefs):

  • Learning Forgiveness

  • Knowing your Strength

  • Speaking your Truth

  • Living Authentically with Integrity

  • Learning & Embracing Self-Love

  • Practicing Gratitude daily

And… a few more, depending on your individual choices :)


But as I said earlier, I don’t believe in “mistakes”. I believe there’re Lessons given to us to learn, and if we have not learned the first time, they will be given again, and again – to finally realize what we need to continue on our Journey. We also need to find and define our WHY-s. I think I am finally clear about my “WHY”. I choose to be an Artist that I was born to be, and that allows me to live authentically because it’s my Truth. But I want you to know that it took me almost 40 years to realize that I just must do it because it’s my Truth, because this is WHO I AM. Because without it, I will not be authentic. I won’t live my life with Integrity as it was meant to be. Because creating my unique Healingarts ‒ is not only one of the many ways to express myself but my unique way to heal myself and others. I am here to bring this message to the World that my Art is healing, my art is Love and Light, it is a healing tool that can help you on your Journey to YourSelf.


Helen Kagan HealingArts.


One of my own very strong (positive!) beliefs is that art heals. And this is exactly why I continue creating, in many different ways, shapes, and forms! I believe that art is a catalyst for healing individuals, society, and environment. I believe that for many of us, creatives, art is a spiritual path, a transformational process, a way of being. I believe in the inter-connectedness of mind, body, and spirit. I believe that now, more than ever, our World needs the positive energy and spiritually-based intentions, beliefs, and values. As a statement of all my beliefs, my “HealingArts” is my unique way to synergistically bring together fine art, expressive arts, and art of healing to enhance wellbeing, make right choices, bring Love & Light, practice gratitude, embrace humanity.


I’ve become a published and bestselling author rather suddenly… I’ve been previously featured in many Magazines including Authority, Thrive Global, ArtTour International, Art & Beyond, VoyageMia, Insights, but then was published in a “We’re All In This Together” (2021) which made me a Bestseller Author. Am continuing to work on my own 2 exciting books (despite all possible challenges), and co-authoring a Book on Authenticity with Jack Canfield. But my most attention and intention are always dedicated to developing my new unique venue integrating Art, Fashion, Design, and Healing – WearableHealingArts™ – to make healing through art more accessible to everyone. Our big commercial platform WearableHealingArts.com is almost ready… Just a few days left to a launch! Stay tuned!


In the meantime, please visit here to enjoy my healing colors, and perhaps even meditate on the above concepts about Authenticity, Integrity, and Self-Love.


Thanks for reading!


Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, Linkedin or visit my website.


 

Helen Kagan, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Helen Kagan Ph.D., a scientist, psychologist, artist, a pioneer of creating art with the intention to heal, is a creator of unique HealingArts™ for 30 years. Helen believes art is a catalyst for healing individuals & society and engaging Healthcare & Hospitality to encourage healing through art. As a severe PTSD survivor who dedicated her life to helping others, she synergistically integrates Fine Art, Expressive Arts & Art of Healing. “HealingArts” shown in multiple International Galleries, States, Countries, and Catalogs, won awards, named "Collectible Artist". Her Mission now is to develop a new unique venue integrating fashion, design, art & healing ‒ WearableHealingArts™ ‒ to make healing through art accessible to everyone.

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