Are You Neurodivergent and Looking for a Counsellor? Here’s What to Look For and Why
Samantha Crapnell is the founder of Training for Counsellors Ltd and practitioner-facilitator of professional qualifications and continuing professional development events to support the training and ongoing development of counsellors and clinical supervisors.
Across the counselling professions, there is growing recognition that therapy will benefit from being genuinely neuro-affirming, especially if it is to be effective for neurodivergent clients. However, we are a long way from saying that all therapists are neuro-affirming, some therapists aren’t sure how to adapt. For the neurodivergent client, this can make it difficult to identify what to look for in a therapist. This article offers a guide to both what neurodivergent clients can look for and what practitioners may need to consider to create an affirming therapeutic space that is effective for all neurotypes.
“Niche construction”
A helpful way to understand neuro-affirming therapy is through niche construction. This is a term used by Thomas Armstrong (2010) to describe how neurodivergent people thrive when they can shape environments around their natural ways of functioning. Rather than expecting clients to adapt to a fixed system, niche construction emphasises creating conditions that support authenticity, coping, and long-term wellbeing.
A neuro-affirming therapist applies this principle by valuing your lived experience as the starting point. They don’t reinterpret your story through a deficit lens, dismiss your perceptions, or assume their framework is more accurate than your own. Instead, they listen closely, recognise the expertise you hold in your inner world and honour the fact that many neurodivergent people have spent their lives misunderstood, misread or pressured to mask.
A therapist working from niche construction will also reflect on their own ableism and the norms they’ve inherited from their training. They may not get everything right, but they remain open, responsive, and willing to adapt.
Every point that follows describes how you can tell a therapist is practising from this neuro-affirming, niche-constructing foundation.
1. They work from a relational frame
If a therapist is genuinely committed to creating a niche that fits you, the relationship needs to be flexible, attuned, and authentic. Relational practice centres the healing power of connection rather than rigid structure or prescribed techniques.
In this kind of relationship, the therapist shows up as a real person, adapts to your pace and communication style, and notices what helps you regulate. Therapy becomes a shared space shaped by your needs, not a performance of what “should” happen in a session. This is niche construction in action.
2. They understand that counselling training is full of neurotypical “shoulds”
Traditional therapeutic training reinforces norms about what a “proper” session should look like, 50-minute weekly appointments, certain displays of empathy, particular indicators of progress. A therapist grounded in niche construction recognises that these conventions don’t fit everyone.
They, therefore, welcome adaptations, changes to lighting, movement during sessions, longer pauses, different scheduling rhythms, or space for sensory needs. Instead of requiring you to fit the model, they reshape the model around you whilst still holding you in an appropriate therapeutic framework.
3. They practise sustainability
Niche construction emphasises environments that support wellbeing. A therapist models this principle by designing a practice that allows them to remain grounded, regulated, and present. This benefits you because a therapist who respects their own needs is typically more attuned to yours. For neurodivergent therapists, sustainability may include managing sensory input, pacing, executive-function demands, or working with awareness of changes in energy levels. Openly exploring what sustainability looks like for both of you can become part of contracting and relationship-building.
4. They actively support you to construct your own niches
A niche-constructing therapist sees adaptations as meaningful, not indulgent. They understand that the environments you shape at home, work, or in therapy can profoundly affect your well-being.
Whether they are neurodivergent themselves or not, they remove barriers within their practice where ethically possible and encourage you to identify what helps your brain function best. Therapy becomes a space where accommodations are normalised and where designing your own supportive environments is part of the work.
5. They are open to reasonable and appropriate adaptations
One of the clearest signs of niche construction is the therapist’s behaviour in the room. Do they allow movement, stimming, or reduced eye contact? Do they invite you to share your preferences? Do they consider sensory factors and potential disruptions?
A neuro-affirming therapist may not be able to meet every request, but they will be transparent, collaborative, and genuinely curious about what each adaptation means for your comfort and connection.
A personal note
My own late diagnosis of autism (and a nudge to seek a diagnosis for ADHD) radically changed the way I think about therapy. I realised that much of my training reflected neurotypical standards I had unconsciously tried to mould myself into. It wasn’t until I allowed myself to construct my own niche as a practitioner that my work became more sustainable and more genuinely aligned with who I am. And this has been a game-changer.
Now, along with other lived-experienced practitioners, we (Training for Counsellors) provide training, workshops, and clinical supervision consultations to support other therapists who want to make their own practices more neuro-affirming for adults, children, and young people. The therapy environment and the relationship matter when working with neurodivergent topics, and both can transform the therapeutic experience.
Read more from Samantha Crapnell
Samantha Crapnell, Training Facilitator, Counsellor, Supervisor
Samantha Crapnell is a training provider and also in practice as a counsellor, clinical supervisor, and executive coach. Training for Counsellors Ltd was created so that counsellors can access alternative routes into and develop within the counselling profession through inclusive education and continuing professional development. Specialisms include anti-oppressive humanistic practices working with children, adolescents, and adults, neurodivergence, and solopreneurship.
References:
Armstrong, T. (2010). The Power of Neurodiversity: Unleashing the Advantages of Your Differently Wired Brain.
Poletti, B., Tasca, G.A., Pievani, L., & Compare, A. (2024). Training in Integrated Relational Psychotherapy: An Evidence-Based Approach.
