Are Professionals Really Prepared to Support People Through Loss?
Written by Heather Higgins, Counsellor & Grief Coach
With extensive experience supporting people through grief and the professionals who work with them, Heather delivers practical, compassionate insights grounded in counselling, psychology, and emotional wellbeing. Her work focuses on helping individuals and organisations navigate grief with confidence and care.
Grief is something almost every professional will encounter, whether they are supporting a grieving pupil in a school, supporting an employee following a bereavement, a client in counselling, or a member of a community group experiencing loss. Yet many professionals find themselves supporting people without having received training in what grief can look like.
Knowing how to recognise and respond to loss can make a significant difference. Grief education is not about turning every professional into a grief specialist, it is about building confidence, understanding and compassion so that people experiencing loss are met with informed, caring and appropriate support.
Why grief education matters for every professional
This can often come up unexpectedly, and it is important that we are equipped to handle these conversations with care, empathy and understanding. Something I have found in my own work is that conversations around grief are quite often avoided. This can be due to a lack of confidence, lack of knowledge, worry about saying the wrong thing, or concern about upsetting someone even further.
Grief doesn't always look like sadness
Grief can present differently depending on the individual, taking into account their age, circumstances and relationship with the person who died. It can present as anger, withdrawal, irritability, changes in behaviour, anxiety, difficulty concentrating, reduced motivation, increased workload as a means of distraction, numbness or dissociation, physical symptoms including increased illness, changes in relationships, or appearing absolutely fine.
Appearing fine does not mean someone is not grieving. If we only recognise grief when someone is visibly upset, we risk missing people who may be struggling the most. This can be particularly true for children and young people who may present in school or at home as having “challenging behaviour.”
The risks of getting grief support wrong
When we are supporting someone through grief, even well-intentioned responses can sometimes have an unhelpful impact. Without an understanding of grief and how differently it can affect people, they may rely on familiar phrases such as “everything happens for a reason,” “you just need to move forward,” or “you need to stay strong.”
While these comments are often intended to offer reassurance, they can leave a grieving person feeling that their emotions are being minimised or misunderstood.
There can also be a tendency to look for a timeline or a particular way that grief should progress. But grief does not follow a predictable path, and people can experience emotional distress while continuing to participate in everyday life.
Getting grief support “right” does not mean having all the answers. It means understanding enough about grief to recognise when our own assumptions, discomfort or desire to make things better might be getting in the way of truly supporting someone.
What does grief-informed practice actually look like?
Being grief-informed does not mean that professionals need to become grief specialists or have an answer for every situation. It means having enough knowledge to recognise that loss can affect people in different ways and knowing how to respond appropriately within the boundaries of your own role.
This might mean creating opportunities for someone to talk about what has happened, using language that acknowledges their loss, or allowing flexibility when grief is affecting their concentration, behaviour, or ability to manage everyday responsibilities.
Grief-informed practice involves recognising the limits of our role. We need to understand what we can offer and when it may be appropriate to signpost someone elsewhere.
Ultimately, grief-informed practice is about responding to the individual rather than applying assumptions about what grief should look like.
7 practical ways professionals can become more grief-informed
Start the conversation: Don’t wait for someone who is grieving to bring it up. A simple acknowledgement can let someone know that their loss is recognised and that they don’t have to avoid the subject.
Learn about different types of loss: Broaden your understanding of what can lead to grief. This can include bereavement, relationship breakdown, illness, redundancy, trauma, changes in identity, loss of independence, and other significant life changes.
Understand that everyone grieves differently: Avoid applying your own expectations to someone else’s experience. Consider the individual, their circumstances, and what support is appropriate for them rather than assuming that one approach will work for everyone.
Build confidence around difficult conversations: Confidence comes with practice. Consider how you would respond to a disclosure of loss, what language you might use, and where you could seek advice if you were unsure how to proceed.
Create space for grief in your environment: Consider whether your workplace, school, or organisation gives people enough flexibility to manage the impact of loss. Review policies around bereavement, time off, communication, and ongoing support, and identify any gaps.
Know when to signpost: Know what support is available within your organisation and local community. This might include counselling, specialist grief support, bereavement organisations, support groups, or other relevant services. Be clear about what falls outside your professional role.
Keep learning: Use supervision, training, professional development, and reliable resources to continue developing your understanding. Grief education should be an ongoing part of professional learning rather than something covered once.
Why grief education should be part of professional development
Grief education can help bridge the gap between uncertainty and confidence when it comes to supporting people through loss. Providing professionals with a greater understanding of grief can create a shared language within a team, improve confidence when having difficult conversations, and reduce the fear of saying the “wrong” thing.
It can also help organisations consider whether their existing policies, procedures, and culture genuinely reflect the needs of people experiencing loss. Ultimately, this is about creating a more grief-informed culture, one where loss is acknowledged rather than avoided, where professionals feel equipped to respond, and where those experiencing grief are met with understanding, compassion, and appropriate support.
Creating change through grief education
Imagine schools where staff feel confident supporting grieving pupils, workplaces where managers do not feel afraid to acknowledge bereavement, counsellors who understand the complexity of grief, and community groups where loss can be spoken about openly.
Through my work as a grief support practitioner, I provide grief education workshops for professionals and organisations. My workshops are tailored to the needs of each organisation, helping professionals develop greater confidence and understanding when supporting people experiencing loss.
If your school, workplace, care setting, counselling service, community group, or organisation would benefit from grief education, I would love to hear from you. You can contact me via heatherhigginscoaching@outlook.com or Instagram to discuss your requirements and find out more about my workshops.
If this article has resonated with you and you would like to continue the conversation, you may also enjoy my articles, Why Conversations About Grief Matter More Than Ever, Supporting Grief vs Trying to Fix It, and Supporting Children and Young People Through Grief. You can also read my interview, How Parental Loss Shaped My Work With Grief, to learn about what inspired my work.
For a deeper exploration of grief and finding purpose after loss, my book, Guided by Grief, is available now. I also share practical guidance, education, and reflections on grief and bereavement through my Instagram community. I invite you to connect, continue learning, and help create a world where no one needs to navigate grief alone.
Read more from Heather Higgins
Heather Higgins, Counsellor & Grief Coach
Heather is a grief specialist, counsellor, author and facilitator with extensive experience supporting children, young people, adults and the professionals who care for them. After losing both parents at a young age, she now uses her lived experience to support others through bereavement. Her work focuses on helping individuals and organisations better understand grief, loss, and emotional resilience through practical, compassionate approaches. Through her writing and teaching, she aims to make conversations around grief more informed, accessible, and human.
