5 Ways To Silence Your Inner Critic

Written by: Julie Leonard, Executive Contributor

Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.

A couple of years ago I was invited to attend an entrepreneurial mastermind in Italy. It was by invite only and limited to just 12 women. I embraced the opportunity and the experience turned out to be incredible and life-changing. However, during the first day, I felt uncomfortable and felt like I didn’t belong with these successful women. Even though I met the criteria for the group, I run a successful coaching business and was personally invited, I felt like an imposter.

Looking back, I’ve felt like an imposter at various points in my life, usually connected with work and most often when I’ve felt out of my comfort zone. What I was feeling was imposter syndrome.

What is Imposter Syndrome?

The term was created by clinical psychologists, Dr. Pauline Clance and Dr. Suzanne Imes, in 1978. They noticed that their female students doubted their abilities despite their degrees, test scores, and positive feedback. The women did not experience an internal sense of success. They saw themselves as’ imposters’.

Imposter syndrome is when you don’t believe that you are worthy of your success and have the persistent fear of being found out, not feeling as good as other people, and often with feelings of anxiety. That due to some internalized limiting beliefs, you believe that somehow your success is down to a mistake or luck.

Sound familiar? You’re not alone. According to research around 70% of people will be affected at some point in their lives- both men and women.

Why do people experience it?

There are many reasons why so many people feel like frauds. Internalized childhood beliefs such as not feeling good enough reduce our self-esteem and self-worth. Low self-confidence means we compare ourselves less favorably with others. Those who battle with perfectionism can be harshly critical of themselves.

Negative Impact

The negative impact of imposter syndrome means that you often work even harder to make up for this perceived ‘lacking’, are unhappy and not enjoying your life, and are not going for promotions and fulfilling your potential.

Here are 5 ways to overcome imposter syndrome that I use with my clients:

1. Identify the thoughts behind the feeling.

So often, our thoughts are so automatic that we simply accept them as ‘Who I am’. Getting behind the feeling of being an imposter and becoming aware of the negative thoughts is the first step. Become curious about what your negative thoughts are and begin to be consciously aware of them.

2. List your achievements and expertise.

Challenge these negative thoughts with facts. Negative thoughts are powerful but they are thoughts, not facts. It’s easy for us to focus on what is aligned with our negative beliefs and ignore anything that doesn’t fit in with our beliefs. Get analytical and write down all the evidence that challenges your negative belief.

3. Stop overworking and set boundaries.

Are you overcompensating for this perceived lack by overworking and overgiving? Stop! Set boundaries and learn to say no.

4. Let go of perfectionism, nobody is perfect.

And if things are not perfect it does not mean they are terrible. Something or someone less than perfect is still amazing. Embrace the knowledge that perfectionism does not exist and embrace your imperfections. That is what makes us unique and fascinating.

5. Develop positive self-talk.

The great news is that we can retrain our brains to become more positive. If your belief is ‘I’m Not Good Enough’ then tell yourself ‘I am good enough’. Even if you don’t believe it at first. Begin to lay those positive neural pathways in your brain and positive self-talk will become easier. In my self-compassion course, we train for just 5 minutes a day for 21 days with incredible results.

Personal and professional growth requires us to be uncomfortable and that’s where the feelings of being an imposter can arise. Understanding what is happening and having the knowledge of how to overcome it, empowers you to change it from a syndrome to a process of transformation.

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Julie Leonard, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

Julie Leonard is The Happiness Evangelist & Life Coach with over 30 years of Psychology, Mental Health, and Coaching Experience. Her concept of Intentional Happiness focuses on how much of your happiness is within your control and how to be proactive, not reactive in cultivating the life you really want. She truly believes that you do not have to be defined by your past, held back by your limiting beliefs, or remain stuck because of your negative inner critic and fear. She is the author of the No1 bestseller, Intentional Happiness: The Life-Changing Guide To Being Happy and Staying Happy, the creator of The Intentional Happiness Circle and Sunndach.com, and is the host of the international women’s Happiness Club.

She used to be that woman. But not anymore, and not for a long time. And after transforming herself and her life and supporting over 1000 women over the past 30 years, she knows that you can take control of your life, let go of limiting beliefs, get clear on what you want, and truly live the life you desire. To be successful. To be Intentionally Happy.