Written by: Jill Witte, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
For a very long time, I lived in a negative mindset to where it became a comfort blanket. Feeling happy felt uncomfortable. Eventually, I got to the point where I wanted my comfort blanket to be happiness, but I knew that to do that I had to look back into my past and see where the negativity started. This can be hard to do but, to me, it was worth it not to live with anxiety and depression. It is important to note that this was done with the help of a therapist and my own self-discoveries.
Here are 3 of the ways I changed my conscious and subconscious to overcome my negative mindset into a positive one.
1. Stop negative self-talk in the conscious: As long as I could remember I would always put myself down to make myself feel better. I know that sounds strange because putting myself down shouldn’t make me feel better, but it answered questions I would ask myself.
answered questions I would ask myself.
“Why don’t those kids want to play with me”? … “you are weird”
“Why doesn’t that person find me attractive”? …“You’re ugly” or “You’re fat”
“Why can’t I do well in school”? …“You’re stupid”
These are just a few of the many negative thoughts I ingrained into my subconscious from a young age. When I wanted to stop the negative self-talk, it was hard at first to say everything in a positive way, especially when I was having a bad day. The more positive self-talk I had the easier it became. Here is how I changed the negative into a positive.
“You are weird” became “You are an amazing unique person”
“You’re ugly and fat” became “You’re beautiful”
“You’re stupid” became “You’re intelligent”
The more I repeated these positive thoughts the negative ones would go away. Soon I became comfortable talking positively about myself.
2. Retraining the subconscious: As it got easier to talk positively in my consciousness, I still had some work to do because the negative thoughts I had as a child became ingrained in my subconscious. I had to have a talk with my subconscious.
“You are an amazing woman”, “you are smart”, “you are beautiful”
“ You can do anything you set your mind to”
“ You are meeting your own expectations”
“You are meeting your own expectations.” was important for me to overcome. As a child, I thought I had to meet other people's expectations. The interesting thing is that no one actually set expectations for me. I put them on myself and did this well into my adulthood. It can be hard not to be a people pleaser because eventually it can consume us and we can lose who we are.
3. Being comfortable with being happy: Living in a negative state for so long we always think it won’t last forever, but thinking that way will make it true. As my conscious and subconscious started being in a positive state, I needed to become comfortable living positively and not waiting for something negative to happen. It took time but eventually being unhappy became uncomfortable and being happy became comfortable. Happiness was finally my comfort blank. I am at peace with myself.
Everything I have gone through has been a journey and didn’t happen overnight. There are days I want to fall back into old habits. When that happens I remind myself what I have gone through and I feel the uncomfortableness that comes with being negative and I stop the old habits. I want to live in a positive mindset and I am.
If you are going through something similar to what I have, know that you are not alone. When you are ready, you can retrain your conscious and subconscious to think positively.
Jill Witte, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Jill Witte, is the founder of True Fit Balance. She is a personal trainer who is certified as a Senior Fitness, Cancer Exercise and Clinical Exercise Specialist. Jill also has certifications as a Nutrition, Brain Health and Life Coach. She created True Fit Balance because of her past experiences of trying to find what exercises and foods worked for her. Now, Jill helps her clients find what works for them by connecting the brain, body and nutrition to create a healthy balanced body. Jill also hosts "Can You Relate Fit and Health". A podcast were she talks with people about their stories of overcoming injury or illness
