Why The Surf of Life is Recovery Reinvented
- 5 days ago
- 7 min read
Godelieve van der Leij has extensive lived experience in international business and recovery. Through her website and blog, both named The Surf of Life, she aims to support others throughout their recovery journeys and bridge the gap between business and mental health care. She is also actively involved in the Recovery Movement in the Netherlands.
The idea that life is not linear, but rather like a set of waves, is ancient. The Roman Stoics and Taoism already gave us a hint, but the idea really took off when modern-day writers like Jon Kabat-Zinn and Danielle LaPorte started to spread the word about learning how to surf the waves of life. I picked up the philosophy in 2014 as a young professional who had just been diagnosed with a chronic mental illness, and it really helped me during my recovery process. I gained a deep realization that in life, as in surfing, there are different stages. I remembered from my time on a real surfboard that one moment you are riding that wave, the next you wipe out, then comes the liminal phase where you wait for the next set to roll in, and finally, there you go, back up on your feet for the next build-up. Easier said than done, I can tell you.
This is not another sad story
Now, I could tell you a story about medication, therapy, loss, grief, overestimation by health care professionals, apparent self-reliance, social declassification, the double culture shock, constantly having to adjust my perspective about the future, and what life is like in long-term mental health care, but I will not. Not today. Instead, I would like to share a few lessons learned from my own recovery process and the ‘Recovery Movement’ as a whole.
What is the Recovery Movement?
The Recovery Movement sprang from psychiatry and mental health care. Its origins lie in the US during the second half of the twentieth century. This is when people like Howard Geld, also known as Howie the Harp, started to advocate for more humane treatment of former mental health care patients. Peer work was born, with people who had ‘lived experience’ supporting others during their recovery from life-altering experiences.
About two decades ago, the initiative came to Europe. Schools like ‘Howie the Harp’ opened in the Netherlands to educate people to become peer workers. Today, there are various Recovery Colleges across the country that organize recovery groups and other activities. Recovery Colleges from elsewhere in Europe also visit Dutch Recovery Colleges to seek out best practices. I learned about the Recovery Movement when I obtained a certificate from Howie the Harp and did peer work at the local Recovery College. Today, peer work, or Experience Expertise, has become a real profession integrated into mental health care practice.
The myth of manufacturability
Growing up as a young professional in corporate structures, winning was a lifestyle for me. Until I was thirty, all I knew was winning. Then I lost my health. I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. For over a decade, I constantly had to reinvent myself within my newfound reality. Life was no longer an upward linear line, but more like a set of waves. Sometimes things went okay for a while. Other years, I had to rebuild my life from scratch. New house, new town, new people, basically a new life. I always thought life could be made, but a coach once told me, ‘life is given’. I believe she was right.
Let me be your guide
I have extensive lived experience in both the corporate world and the world of long-term mental health care, and I believe these worlds can learn a lot from one another through the Recovery Movement. Right now, it is mainly part of mental health care. However, since I speak the language of both business and mental health care, I know what success is, but I also know about struggle, and I aim to bridge the gap between the two.
I am different from many Experience Experts who might have grown up in mental health care or who do not have a background in business on a global level. Therefore, I would like to be a guide for young professionals, mental health care patients, business managers, health care professionals, and everyone else who is interested in lifting recovery out of mental health care and applying it to other areas of life.
Four takeaways from recovery
Obviously, I learned many lessons over the course of a decade during my recovery process. I know firsthand that getting sick does not just mean losing your health, but can also mean losing your job, home, and social status. However, for the purpose of this article, I would like to emphasize the four main lessons I learned from recovery. I will elaborate on them below.
1. Making a career vs. Living on benefits
I think the biggest difference, but at the same time a parallel, between making a career and living on benefits once mentally ill is how you spend your time. Making a career is a lifestyle and very time-consuming. Days and weeks are packed with work, appointments, and people. Time is carefully scheduled to make everything ‘fit’. In return, you receive a nice salary, so you can vacation in faraway places and go out for fancy dinners with family and friends.
At the other end of the spectrum sits living on benefits. Since there is no job obligation, time can be spent in many ways, such as working on your recovery by going to the Recovery College, meeting with your therapist, talking to peers, or doing volunteer work. Money is scarce, so you have to be very creative in finding free or cheaper activities and people with a similar lifestyle.
The lessons I learned were, first, that the discipline of working long hours and following a tight schedule, developed through working in corporate structures, came in very useful when living on welfare. This muscle memory helped me stay active and disciplined during the week. On the other hand, I truly learned to be creative with a lot of time on my hands but hardly any money to spend.
2. Always on vs. Early retirement
In my fast-paced working life, I was ‘always on’, always available for either work or my social network, as I remember it. During the first few years of my recovery, however, life felt like ‘early retirement’. That is what some fellow clients called it, at least. I think what young professionals today can learn from the Recovery Movement and mental health care as a whole is to slow down every once in a while.
On the other hand, the businesslike ‘can do’ spirit is what is often missing among clients. People in long-term health care tend to lean back and get used to their free time and slow days, while there is so much potential when it comes to contributing to society once we take a closer look at their competencies and life experience. Of course, this should take into account their daily energy levels and general interests.
3. Not your job vs. Not your diagnosis
When I lived the corporate lifestyle and was successful in the eyes of society, I identified myself with my job. But when I had to leave my career behind, existential questions started to surface. Who was I if I was not my job? Following that, as a patient, especially when I really started to work on my recovery, I became consumed with my mental illness. But soon I learned that you are not your diagnosis. It is something you have, not something you are.
On another note, my business experience taught me about success and the pursuit of opportunities. This really helped during my recovery process when I was looking for help and volunteer work. Recovery, meanwhile, taught me a lot about self-reflection and about taking the time every once in a while to process the experiences of life.
4. Prevention vs. Recovery
Finally, with so many people recovering from burnout, depression, or other causes, I believe the focus should shift from recovery to the prevention of mental illness. We can come up with initiatives like the Recovery Movement, but what needs to be done, in my opinion, is to create healthy environments at work and in society as a whole. This way, people do not get sick in the first place, at least not in such great numbers.
Did you know that worldwide, 1 billion people live with a mental illness, and that many of them have a good job and are well educated? It makes you wonder, right? But that is a different discussion.
The Surf of Life in practice
The Surf of Life is a recovery story turned into a theory that compares the different stages of both recovery and life: surfing, wipeout, the liminal phase, and buildup. It is not just meant for people who seek support during their recovery process, but also for business leaders who develop policies on retention and reintegration, and for health care professionals looking for other ways to activate their clients.
If you want to read more about my recovery and are looking to collaborate, or have any other inquiries, please visit the contact page on the website or my profile page. Remember, life is like a set of waves. Sometimes you’re up, and sometimes you’re down.
Read more from Godelieve van der Leij
Godelieve van der Leij, Experience Expert in Recovery
Godelieve van der Leij is a former IBM and Nike employee. After being diagnosed with a mental illness in 2013, she began working on her own recovery and became involved with the Recovery Movement. This experience inspired her to share the idea behind The Surf of Life, which compares life to a series of waves with its inevitable ups and downs. She is the founder, content manager, and author of the website and blog of the same name, which aims to “give people faith in their abilities to overcome.”
