What's The Self-Fulling Prophecy Got To Do With Self-Love?
Updated: Feb 13, 2023
Written by: Sue Plumtree, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
I’m sure we’ve all heard about the self-fulfilling prophecy but you might not be clear about what this is exactly or how it works.
Self-fulfilling prophecies work both ways; it can support or hinder you through your expectations about the outcome of things you may want. If you believe that you will get what you want, you’re more likely to go for it, to do what it takes to get you there. If, on the other hand, you think what you want is way out of your reach you’re likely to think, “why bother? It’s never going to happen.”
That can refer to anything, from approaching someone you’d like to meet, to going for a promotion, a job you’d love that’s just been advertised or it could refer to meeting the right partner for you. I’ve been talking to hundreds of people about relationships, their bitter experiences, their current lives, and current relationships.
I often feel heartbroken to hear them, especially when it’s so clear that they believe they will never have a fulfilling life or a loving relationship or caring and supportive friends. And so, they often don’t even try or, if they do try, they do it half-heartedly and then tell themselves, “See? I knew it wouldn’t work!”
The root problem is a lack of self-love.
These people don’t love themselves; worse, they believe they don’t deserve to be loved. And, as a result, they withhold their own love, they don’t reach out, they don’t do kind gestures and then they wonder why their life is so empty.
Sometimes they look for somebody to complete them, to prod them to do something or stop doing something they know is not good for them instead of starting it or stopping it for themselves.
Self-love is the foundation, the absolute core of a happy and fulfilling life, of strong and loving relationships, and even of satisfying jobs and careers. It is my mission to enable people to love themselves.
To that end on 6 April, I’m launching my love bootcamp called ‘How to Love Yourself so You Can Love and Be Loved’. I’m only accepting 8 people maximum so I can give you the individual attention you deserve. If you want to know more, please email me here or text me on 07903 795027. I look forward to hearing from you.
Sue Plumtree, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Sue’s passion is to enable people to build strong and loving relationships.
Her third book, ‘Open Your Heart: The 7 Secrets Of Strong And Loving Relationships’, is getting 5* reviews on Amazon.
Sue was unhappily married for 37 years when she finally left aged 60.
Over the following 10 years, she built a successful coaching practice working with people over 50, wrote her autobiography, and built solid friendships.
In December 2015, aged 70, she met Dave, her best friend, lover, soulmate, and now her husband.
As a prolific writer and regular blogger, Sue shares her painfully acquired wisdom about what works and doesn’t work in a relationship, as well as how it affects our emotional, and mental health and wellbeing.
She also loves writing about how to build strong, loving, and long-lasting relationships both from personal experience as well as research articles and longitudinal studies.
Sue is a personal relationship coach, trainer, facilitator, and published author.
