What Actually Motivates Self-Love and How to Cultivate It?
- Oct 18, 2025
- 4 min read
Patricia Kaulmann supports the balance between body and mind. She published the book "My Little Big Transformation" in Portuguese and German in 2024 and is a co-developer of HTGMusic, a supportive, energetic method with sound/frequencies.
If I say that abandoning yourself is the beginning of many illnesses, some might laugh at me. That's no joke. If I say that the cure for every illness lies within yourself, many might also laugh at me. I never tire of repeating this, though. In the form of a wake-up call. Yes, it's time to wake up. However, everyone will always be free to continue 'sleeping,' if that's their own choice.
How do you know that you love yourself?
In truth, you know it very well. Either you're honest with yourself or you're not. If you're someone who says, "I'll help everyone else first, then it'll be my turn sometime when I have time. I just have to," you haven't understood anything!
Have you ever flown? What are we told before takeoff, among other things? When the masks come off, put on your own first, then take care of your neighbor, child, or anyone else. What do you understand by that? It has nothing to do with being selfish. It simply means that if you're not well, you can't help anyone else, and maybe both will die.
It's the same in life. Always. If helping others inspires you, great! Take care of yourself, too. Then you can do everything with energy. Then you're capable of achieving anything. I've often heard, "How could he/she have gotten cancer? She helped everyone. She only did good things!" Then I ask, what did he/she do for themselves? Life is a balance of give and take. Always.
Self-love is different from selfishness
Self-love means taking care of yourself, accepting yourself, and listening to yourself. Selfishness is acting for your own benefit and needs without consideration for others. Then we have altruism, the opposite, selfless action for the well-being of others, out of compassion without self-interest.
Self-love draws on other concepts such as self-worth, self-respect, self-awareness, and self-confidence. They are connected somewhere and build our "I am."
Self-love is taking time for yourself. Paying attention to your mind and body. Accepting mistakes (that aren't mistakes) and frustration or anger as growth and making the most of them. Accepting what has happened, letting go, and continuing on with experience and a willingness to learn.
Are you never allowed to be angry, sad, or anything else?
Whether one is allowed, your emotions are there to warn you. If you've read other articles of mine, you've probably already experienced this. We have five basic emotions, sadness, anger, worry, fear, and love. From these, other, more specific emotions arise. These five emotions are essential for survival. They warn us through experiences we've inherited or experienced ourselves.
That means exactly that. Your brain will react according to old patterns. Emotions are linked to specific organs (you can observe this very precisely in energetic Chinese medicine). That's why you repeatedly experience discomfort in certain areas that come and go, and no one, or very few, understands.
The secret is, whatever happens, how you react in response. Look, perceive it, question it, act. Transform suffering into power. It's possible. You have to decide to do it and then trust the path.
By the way, do you really believe that Buddha, the Dalai Lama, Jesus, and all the other sages were never angry or frustrated? Of course. The difference between us? The time they allowed themselves to dwell in such frequencies.
Is there a ‘recipe’ for this?
Yes and no. If you respect yourself and have discovered your self-awareness, you will have understood that you live in the now. What you live today determines tomorrow, which is also today. Do you notice that? You only live in the now. So create bridges that "propel" you into higher frequencies, improve your mood, absorb the lessons, but replace the bad emotions with better ones.
Have you ever looked in the mirror, smiled, and said something nice to yourself? It feels so good. (Okay, it's really weird at first, but eventually you'll miss it if you don't do it.) Right after brushing your teeth. The mirror only smiles at you if you do it first. So does the world. The world responds to your behavior, confirming what you send out.
What do I personally do?
Today, there are different "tricks," methods, and ways. I actually use frequencies myself that not only take me where I want to be, but also energetically nourish my system. That's why I developed HTGMusic. You can always find 15 minutes for that somewhere.
I recommend everyone to build a little time for themselves in their day. For meditation, exercise (the minimum to stay fit), reading, or whatever else brings you joy. Yes! That's self-love. Being there for yourself.
If you're doing well, everyone else is doing well, too!
Read more from Patricia Kaulmann
Patricia Kaulmann, Specialist for Biological Emotional Balance
Patricia Kaulmann helps people understand how they can activate their self-healing through their thoughts and emotions and how they can get rid of blockages and beliefs through emotional intelligence and energetically supported frequencies. The right mindset plays a major role in healing. For this, it is essential to understand your own body embryologically, biologically, and emotionally. This is where Patricia brings in her expertise. Everyone should have access to this information and be able to live happily.
