The Comfortable Lie That's Murdering Your Business
- Brainz Magazine
- 15 hours ago
- 6 min read
Written by Rebecca T Dickson, Leadership Coach
Rebecca T Dickson is recognized as one of the most transformational leaders in the world. She is the founder of The Yes Method, teaching leaders how to feel and process emotions; an intuitive author, a horse medicine practitioner, and a huge fan of nature-based therapies.
Every entrepreneur's instinct when their business starts bleeding money is to buy more strategy. More business coaching. More marketing funnels. More productivity hacks.
It's the ultimate avoidance tactic, disguised as taking action.
Here's the brutal truth: you don't need another business coach. You need regulation, which can only come from self-acceptance and shadow work. But that requires looking in the mirror instead of hiding behind the comfortable lie that you just need better systems.
Business coaching feels safe because it lets you stay in your head. It promises external solutions to internal problems. It tells you the issue is out there somewhere, not buried deep in your unhealed nervous system.
Shadow work terrifies you because it demands you face the parts of yourself you've spent decades running from. It's easier to spend $10K on a marketing course than $500 on sitting with your crap because one lets you stay comfortable in your delusions.
Your business isn't failing because you lack strategy. It's dying because your nervous system is running the show like a drunk toddler with a machine gun.
Every entrepreneur pretends their constant state of fight-or-flight is just "hustle culture." That’s patently false. You're not grinding. You're drowning. Your dysregulated nervous system is sabotaging every decision, relationship, and opportunity that crosses your path.
The hidden assassin in your C-suite
Your nervous system doesn't give a damn about your quarterly projections. When it's hijacked by unprocessed emotions, it operates from one brutal mandate: survive at all costs.
This means your brilliant business brain gets overruled by a primitive alarm system that sees threats everywhere.
I've watched countless entrepreneurs torch seven-figure businesses because their nervous system couldn't tell the difference between a challenging client conversation and a saber-toothed tiger.
The result? They either become people-pleasing doormats or raging tyrants. Neither builds sustainable wealth.
Your hypervigilant nervous system turns you into a micromanaging control freak who suffocates every creative idea before it can breathe. Or it floods you with so much anxiety that you freeze completely, paralyzed by analysis while opportunities slip through your fingers like water.
The trauma tax on your bottom line
Here's what nobody talks about in those shiny business courses: whatever created that dysregulated nervous system isn't just your sad backstory. It's a living, breathing entity that follows you into every boardroom, every sales call, every strategic decision.
When you're dysregulated, you operate from scarcity even when abundance is right in front of you. You undercharge because, deep down, you believe you're worthless. You over-deliver because you're terrified of abandonment. You burn out your team because you can't trust anyone to handle what you think only you can do.
I once worked with a client who built a multiple six-figure coaching business, then systematically destroyed it by saying yes to every opportunity that came her way. Her fawn response was so strong, she couldn't disappoint anyone—even when it meant disappointing herself into bankruptcy.
Your nervous system doesn't just affect you. It infects your entire organization like a virus. Your employees mirror your dysregulation. If you're operating from fight-or-flight, your team becomes hypervigilant too. If you're checked out and frozen, they lose direction and motivation.
The fight, flight, freeze, fawn business models
Fight entrepreneurs turn their businesses into battlegrounds. Every negotiation is a war. Every competitor is an enemy to destroy. They burn bridges faster than they can build them, and wonder why nobody wants to work with them long term.
Flight entrepreneurs chase every shiny object and pivot so often they never build anything substantial. They're always one launch away from success but never stay in one place long enough to see results.
Freeze entrepreneurs get paralyzed by perfectionism. They spend years planning, researching, and preparing, but never actually launch anything. They're experts at everything except taking action.
Fawn entrepreneurs say yes to everyone and no to themselves. They work for free, accept abuse from clients, and build businesses that serve everyone except them.
Your nervous system's death grip on success
When your nervous system is hijacked, your decision-making becomes completely compromised. You make choices from fear instead of wisdom. You react instead of respond. You survive instead of thrive.
Your dysregulated state creates tunnel vision. You can't see opportunities because you're too busy scanning for threats. You can't build relationships because you're either too defended or too desperate. You can't innovate because your brain is stuck in survival mode.
The cruel irony is that the nervous system designed to protect you becomes the thing that destroys everything you're trying to build.
Reclaiming your nervous system, reclaiming your empire
Here's the truth they don't want you to know: sorting that dysregulation isn't about becoming soft or weak. It's about becoming dangerous in all the right ways.
When you regulate your nervous system, you stop operating from desperation and start operating from power. You make decisions from clarity instead of chaos. You build relationships from authenticity instead of manipulation.
A regulated nervous system gives you access to your full intelligence. You can think strategically instead of just reactively. You can see the bigger picture instead of getting lost in the weeds of daily firefighting.
Your nervous system regulation becomes your ultimate competitive advantage. While your competitors are drowning in their own dysregulation, you're making clear-headed decisions that compound into massive success.
The rebellion against nervous system tyranny
Healing your nervous system isn't about becoming a zen master who never gets triggered. It's about developing the capacity to feel everything without letting it run your business into the ground.
You learn to recognize when your nervous system is hijacked and have tools to regulate yourself in real time. You stop making million-dollar decisions from a ten-cent emotional state.
This isn't about positive thinking or gratitude journals. This is about soothing your nervous system so it serves your vision instead of sabotaging it.
Your regulated nervous system becomes the foundation for everything else: better decision-making, stronger leadership, deeper relationships, sustainable growth.
Stop bleeding money, start healing your system
You can keep throwing strategy at a dysregulated nervous system and watch it fail spectacularly. Or you can finally address the real problem.
The Trauma Paradox teaches you how to weaponize what broke you instead of letting it break your business. This isn't about healing your inner child. It's about turning your perceived flaws into your most lethal business assets.
Summer School gives you the daily practices to regulate your nervous system in real time and offers you the fastest ways to get visible and get clients. No more making decisions from triggered states. No more letting your fight-or-flight run your company into the ground.
Shadow Rising is where you meet the parts of yourself you've been hiding from and learn to use that darkness as fuel. Your shadow isn't your enemy. It's your untapped power source.
Each program attacks nervous system dysregulation from different angles and price points. Pick your poison based on where you are and how deep you're ready to go.
The bottom line
Your business problems aren't business problems. They're nervous system problems wearing business suits.
Until you address the dysregulation at the root, you'll keep recreating the same patterns of self-sabotage, no matter how many strategies you learn or courses you take.
Your nervous system is either your greatest asset or your most expensive liability. The choice is yours.
But here's what I know for sure: the entrepreneurs who win aren't the ones with the best business plans. They're the ones who've done the deep work to reclaim their nervous systems.
Your empire is waiting on the other side of your regulation.
Rebecca T Dickson, Leadership Coach
Rebecca T Dickson is recognized as one of the most transformational leaders in the world. She is the founder of The Yes Method, teaching leaders how to feel and process emotions – and rise. During her 16 years in the coaching industry, she has served tens of thousands of clients globally. The mission: Be yourself.
