The Art Of Inquiry – Why Asking The Right Questions Is Vital For Personal Growth And Success
- Brainz Magazine
- Aug 10, 2023
- 4 min read
Written by: Stephanie Train Puente, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Do you ever find yourself feeling trapped — unable to break free from the same frustrating patterns, or unproductive habits?
"The quality of your life is determined by the quality of the questions you ask yourself." – Tony Robbins
I get it. Because I’ve been there myself.
I’ve come to realize that one of the most effective ways to overcome feeling stuck is by looking at the questions we ask ourselves. Just like entering a question in a search engine — the quality of our questions determines the quality of the information we receive. And these questions play a vital role in shaping the outcomes we desire. Because our questions shape our thoughts, perspectives, and ultimately, our actions.
In order to break free from a disempowering cycle, we need to ask ourselves the right questions. More empowering questions. Because empowered questions attract empowered answers.
In this article, we'll explore the difference between disempowering and empowering questions and learn how asking the right questions can guide you toward a more fulfilling life.
Disempowering vs. empowering questions
1. Why
Asking "why" is a disempowering question for a couple of reasons. First — it tends to keep us in a victim mentality, ignoring our power to shape our own lives. Whether it’s questioning why certain things happen to us or why we didn't achieve our desired outcomes.
"Why" questions also restrict our answers to our intellect alone, or leave us to simply guess. Since the analytical mind relies on past experiences and data, asking "why" perpetuates the cycle of recreating familiar outcomes — holding us back from moving forward.
When we ask a question, our focus and energy are directed toward finding answers to them. And the energy of our questions matches the energy of our answers.
For example, asking, "Why am I always struggling to achieve financial freedom?" emphasizes limitations and reinforces a negative perspective. However — by asking a different question like, "What can I do to travel around the world and earn money while doing it?" we invite answers aligned with our desire for adventure and abundance.
It shifts our focus towards proactive solutions and opens the door to new possibilities.
2. When
"When" is another disempowering question because it implies that our desired results depend on external circumstances. We fall into the trap of believing our goals can only be reached once everything falls into place. When things are “perfect”.
“When ____ happens, then I’ll have ____”...
Sound familiar?
But the truth is, our desired outcomes depend on our internal state of mind and being. Instead of fixating on when external factors will change, we must focus on becoming the version of ourselves now that’s in alignment with our aspirations.
Instead of fixating on when external factors will change, we must focus on what we can do today that will bring us closer to who and where we want to be. The answer to "when" is always "now." By acknowledging this and releasing our focus on what it is we lack, we shift our mindset toward abundance and success.
“When” inspires us to move beyond waiting for the “perfect” conditions and to seize opportunities as they arise.
3. What
"What" questions are the key to unlocking our creative intelligence and tapping into infinite possibilities. When faced with challenges or goals, asking ourselves, "What can I do differently?" or "What action can I take to get to where I want to be?" connects us to our potential and opens the door to innovative approaches and new perspectives.
For instance, asking "What steps can I take today to become the CEO of my own company?" or "What can I do differently today to achieve financial freedom?" directs our focus toward actionable steps that align with our goals.
4. Who
Asking "Who" questions allow us to embody the qualities of the person we aspire to be. By focusing on the version of ourselves we aim to be — we become a better match for the outcomes we desire.
Begin thinking, feeling, and acting as the version of yourself that is deserving, capable, and in harmony with what you desire. Because when you see yourself as who you are now, you risk ending up recreating the same results.
So instead of wondering “Why is this taking so long?” ask instead: “Who do I need to be NOW to better align with my goals and what actions can I take today to move closer to them?”
By asking "Who” and identifying the qualities that match the vision we have for ourselves — we can align our thoughts, emotions, and actions accordingly.
Conclusion
Remember, the quality of the questions we ask ourselves plays a pivotal role in shaping our lives. By asking ourselves more empowered questions, we can transform our mindset, attract aligned answers, and take empowered actions.
By making this shift, and asking higher-quality questions, we invite higher-quality solutions into our lives — and achieve our most desired goals.
Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website to learn more about how we can work together to support you in asking the right questions — and empower you to create the life you dream of.
Stephanie Train Puente, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Stephanie Puente is a certified coach, speaker, international bestselling author and practitioner of life success principles. Her 25+ years of study and experience working with transformational mindset tools has helped hundreds of people to reshape their lives and discover their inherent ability to build their dreams and create a life they love living. Stephanie is a bridge for women leaders, helping them to transform their inner critic into an empowered advocate for greater self-love and authentic confidence so that they boldly shine their light, give their gifts, and fulfill their mission in business and in life.
