Resilience Is Not Endurance – Rethinking Mental Health in Leadership

Written by Sarah Roberts, Global Strategy and Communications Leader

Sarah is one of two managing partners at Vane Percy & Roberts with 25 years of experience in global strategy and communications. Known for her clear thinking, sharp wit, and approachable style, she blends expertise in media, public affairs, and strategy to deliver smart, effective solutions that make a real difference.

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This is part two in a short series I’m sharing on leadership and mental health, something I started writing because I’ve seen and lived the quiet cost of trying to hold it all together. In the first piece, I spoke about how we keep showing up when we don’t feel strong about the internal dissonance that can happen when we’re expected to project calm and control while privately carrying stress, doubt, or depletion. If you missed it, you can find it here.

Today, I want to go deeper into a word we use constantly in leadership, resilience.

We admire it. We reward it. It’s in job descriptions, team values and coaching frameworks. We wear it like a badge of honour.

But here’s the thing. We’ve confused resilience with endurance. And that misunderstanding is quietly burning people out.

Endurance says: Keep going, push through, don’t stop

Resilience says, rest. Recover and come back with clarity. Endurance is what helps us survive a crisis. Resilience is what allows us to lead again, sustainably, after the crisis is over.

One is reactive. The other is intentional. And yet in many organisations, we celebrate the grind. We applaud the ones who “just keep going” without stopping. The ones who don’t break down. The ones who are “always on.”

But what looks like resilience from the outside often hides quiet exhaustion on the inside.

I’ve been there too

Doing meaningful work while feeling increasingly disconnected from it. Saying yes to things I didn’t have the capacity for. Holding it together in rooms while running on fumes outside of them.

And the hardest part? It still looked like strength. It still looked like leadership. Because endurance does, until it doesn’t.

We don’t talk enough about the toll of prolonged “coping.” The slow erosion of creativity, connection, and clarity. The narrowing of perspective. The rising resentment. The feeling of being trapped in a performance you can’t pause.

And we certainly don’t talk enough about how many brilliant leaders stay in that state for far too long, believing that’s what’s expected. Or worse, believing that to step back is to somehow let people down.

But here’s what I’ve learned. Just because you can keep going doesn’t mean you should. And needing rest doesn’t mean you’re failing.

Resilience isn’t about being invincible

It’s about being intact.

It’s about staying resourced enough to still make good decisions, build strong teams, and lead with clarity.

It’s about having systems, personal and professional, that catch you before you crash:

• Boundaries that protect your time, focus, and energy

• Recovery that’s non-negotiable, not just a luxury

• People you trust to tell the truth and ask for help

• Awareness to recognise your limits, and act on them

So what does real resilience look like in leadership?

It’s not heroic. It’s not loud. It’s not showy.

It looks like this:

• You know your internal signals and you don’t override them.

• You value recovery as much as execution.

• You build support into your structure, not just your calendar.

• You don’t conflate self-worth with output.

• You model healthy behaviours, not performative endurance.

It also looks like letting go of the idea that to be strong is to always be available. Sometimes, real strength is in saying not today so that you can say yes with integrity tomorrow.

Endurance is what gets you through the hard season

Resilience is what lets you return whole. So if you’re someone who’s always carried the pressure well, who’s often been the calm one, the capable one, the “go-to” in a crisis, ask yourself this, At what cost?

You don’t have to break down to step back. You don’t need to justify needing rest. And if the strongest move you can make this season is to pause, not push, then that, too, is leadership.

Part of a short series on leadership and mental health. If it resonates, follow along for more.

Follow me on LinkedIn for more info!

Read more from Sarah Roberts

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Sarah Roberts, Global Strategy and Communications Leader

Sarah is one of two managing partners at Vane Percy & Roberts, with 25+ years in global comms, strategy, public affairs, and stakeholder relations. Known for her clear thinking, sharp wit, and approachable style, she delivers tailored solutions that drive impactful change. Her mission: to lead with authenticity, foster collaboration, and ensure every team member feels heard and valued. Recognised for her bold, inventive approach, Sarah is a gifted networker and convenor of creative talent, always ready to make strategic choices that drive success.