Red Lights (And Other Things That Make Us Pause) ‒ How The In-Between Moments Can Help You Thrive
- Dec 20, 2022
- 4 min read
Updated: Jan 24, 2024
Written by: Ginger Carlson, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
It is perhaps the most wonderfully busy time of year. It can also be the most stressful. Let’s begin it with an invitation to pause…
This arrival into quiet sitting
is merely a suggestion
A gift of grace
Until the ground begs for our bones.
Some thirst for silence here.
What if this discovering tranquility
In midst of mayhem
Is the real journey?
I think I’ll choose
the pain
the practice
the payoff
In that order
A warm invitation
To hover
Make the 2-millimeter shift
And knit ourselves back into
being
That’s right, the simple gift of grace that brings us back to our being.
The things that can invite an arrival into quiet sitting for us.
Consider this: In all your rushing and merry-making, do you ever suddenly find yourself stuck at an unexpected “red light?” Either literally or figuratively, they sometimes tend to pop up on the road of life when we are most intent on arriving somewhere quickly. They can feel like poor timing, an obstacle to your destination, a stress inducer, or plain bad luck. They can also be the best gifts of the season if we are open to receiving them. Here is your invitation.
The thing is, I’ve had more “red lights” than usual lately… all things I didn’t expect but made me stop, contemplate, wonder, and wake up to something new. There have been lots of little moments that caused me to forcibly pause my plans, such as my dog who wouldn’t come when called at the dog park, a pipe that burst and a resulting closed highway leading to where I needed to go, and longer than usual lines at the grocery store check out.
I’ve also had some crazily big moments of “pause” lately. Most notably, my partner’s sudden need for open heart surgery and the care and love it takes to recover (and thrive) from one. Sometimes the universe is telling us to slow down a bit. What a gift when we can actually listen.
What if the red lights in our lives were opportunities to think with greater intentionality, to savor with more openness, and to love with a depth we didn’t realize we could? What if we could see these moments as unique, gifted times? We often wait for large chunks of time. Perhaps it is the little moments when stacked, that will prepare us the best.
This is your invitation to embrace the “red lights,” anything in your daily life that reminds you to pause and be keenly aware. Maybe it is actually a red light, a 30-second moment of pause. Perhaps it is your phone ringing that triggers you to slow your breathing a bit. Maybe you slow your gait while moving to answer it and feel the ground more softly. Perhaps you take it as a time to contemplate, to dream, to let your mind release the things that can hold it back from making magic happen. Perhaps there is a moment of pause at the start of one of your busiest seasons.
How can you incorporate a Red Light Practice into your day? It’s easier than we make it out to be. Here are a few tips:
Pick an environmental sound or event that might usually be annoying (such as actually getting stopped at the red light, the sound of the train going past, or the voice of the colleague or neighbor who gets on your nerves.) Choose for that to be your “red light” and remember that your happiness is always a choice.
When that event happens, stop what you are doing and make a conscious choice to put your body in “state” – however that looks for you – stand straighter, shoulders back, hand on your heart, lungs full of fresh air, a gentle smile on your face. Bonus: when this becomes one of your habits, some real magic can happen.
Say to yourself, "Thank you. What a perfect moment I have to pause and contemplate and find a gift." You may find that those “red lights” become your everyday gratitude.
How can you spread this thinking?
Albert Einstein said, “Setting an example is not the main means of influencing others, it is the only means.” If you want to spread this idea of taking intentional pauses, just practice it. Do it yourself, and it will spread. The more you practice it, the more it will begin to show up in your life and the lives of those around you.
You can also jump-start it by actually spreading it around this holiday season. If you are thinking of giving a gift in the coming holidays (to your employees or other people you are in a relationship with) why not consider the gift of time? A day off of their choosing. Time away from the bustle, where their duties are taken care of for them.
We humans rush. Let’s encourage each other to take the moments we need for true reflection, rejuvenation, and re-connection. In these times, it seems we are going to need it.
Ginger Carlson, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Dr. Ginger Carlson is an international keynote and TEDx speaker, leader, and award-winning author. She has presented and written widely on the topics of creativity, communication, growth, and transformation, and how to uniquely and positively nurture each of them in our personal lives and organizations. Dr. Carlson is the co-founder of Möbius Dynamics and CEO of The Multarity Project™. She can be contacted through her websites https://www.gingercarlson.com/ and https://www.multarityproject.com/
