Prostate Cancer – Why Men Must Break the Silence
Denton Hugh Wilson is an author, speaker, and men’s health advocate who turns lived experience into education and hope. Through writing and advocacy, he encourages honest conversations about men’s health while inspiring others through stories of resilience, courage, and positive change.
For many men, talking about health does not come easily. We may speak freely about work, family, sport, and everyday life, yet when something changes in our bodies, silence can suddenly take over. Prostate cancer taught me just how dangerous that silence can be. My own experience changed the way I think about men’s health and taught me that speaking up, asking questions, and seeking professional medical advice are not signs of weakness. They are acts of responsibility to ourselves and to the people who love us.
When health becomes personal
Until something happens to us personally, health statistics can sometimes feel distant. We hear numbers, read reports, and see awareness campaigns, but it is different when the subject suddenly becomes part of your own life.
When prostate cancer entered my life, I was no longer looking at the issue from the outside. I was the man who had questions. I was the man who had to think about what the future might hold. That experience taught me something I have never forgotten: silence does not protect us.
Men can sometimes convince themselves that being strong means carrying worries alone. We may not want to frighten our families. We may feel embarrassed discussing certain symptoms, or we may hope that whatever concerns us will disappear.
But real strength can mean doing the opposite. It can mean speaking to someone. It can mean asking uncomfortable questions. It can mean making that appointment and talking with a qualified healthcare professional. Sometimes, one man speaking openly gives another man permission to speak too.
Why men stay silent
Men stay silent about their health for many different reasons. For some, it is fear–fear of what a doctor might find, fear of treatment, or fear of how a diagnosis could change their lives.
For others, it may be embarrassment. Talking about the prostate, urinary changes, or intimate health can feel uncomfortable, especially for men who grew up believing that personal matters should remain private.
Then there is the idea of masculinity that many of us were taught: be strong, don’t complain, deal with your problems yourself.
But I have come to see strength differently. Strength is being willing to say, “I need to get this checked.” Strength is talking to your doctor even when the conversation feels uncomfortable. Strength is telling a brother, friend, father, or son, “Look after yourself. Your health matters.”
We need to create a culture where men can talk about their health as naturally as we talk about football, work, or what is happening in the world.
Because when one man breaks the silence, the conversation does not necessarily end with him. It can travel through families, friendships and communities, and it may encourage another man to take action.
Know your risk
For Black men, understanding prostate cancer risk is particularly important. In the UK, 1 in 4 Black men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer in their lifetime. That is double the lifetime risk for White men, which is around 1 in 8.
Those figures should make us think, talk, and take our health seriously. For me, they are another reason why silence around prostate cancer has to end.
Risk increases with age, and family history can also increase a man’s risk. For Black men, Prostate Cancer UK recommends speaking to a GP about prostate cancer risk from the age of 45, even without symptoms. Knowing your own circumstances gives you something important: the opportunity to have an informed conversation with your GP or another qualified healthcare professional.
I especially want Black men to understand that we should not wait until fear forces us to have these conversations. Knowing our risk is higher gives us a reason to stay aware, ask questions, and take responsibility for our health.
Looking after ourselves also includes thinking about our overall lifestyle. A healthy, balanced diet and maintaining a healthy weight are important for general health. However, food should not be presented as a substitute for medical care or prostate cancer treatment. My message is simple: know your risk, know your body, ask questions, and speak to your doctor.
A life-saving conversation
Talking about men’s health is important, but the conversation must also lead to action. If a man notices a change in his body or has concerns about his prostate health, he should not simply hope that it will go away. Speaking with a healthcare professional can help him understand what may be happening and what, if anything, needs to happen next.
Men should also understand their own risk. Age and family history are among the factors that can affect prostate cancer risk. Knowing your personal circumstances gives you something valuable: the opportunity to have an informed conversation with your doctor.
We should also encourage one another. Ask your brother how he is doing. Talk to your father. Talk to your friends. If somebody tells you he is worried about his health, listen rather than dismissing his concerns.
I am not suggesting that men should diagnose themselves or live in fear. My message is much simpler: Know your body. Know your risk. Ask questions, and when you are concerned, seek professional medical advice.
A conversation may take only a few minutes, but it can be the beginning of an important decision about your health. We cannot control everything that happens to us. But we can choose not to suffer in silence.
Why I wrote the book
My experience with prostate cancer did more than change the way I thought about my own health. It gave me a responsibility to use my voice.
I began thinking about the men who might be sitting at home with questions they are afraid to ask. The man who has noticed something different but keeps putting off speaking to his doctor. The husband who does not want to worry his family. The brother who believes he has to deal with everything alone.
I wanted to say to those men:
"You do not have to remain silent."
That desire eventually became part of the reason I wrote Brothers, Let’s Talk. The book grew from lived experience and from my determination to encourage conversations about prostate cancer and men’s health that too often never happen.
But for me, this has become bigger than a book. It is about creating conversations between fathers and sons, brothers and brothers, husbands and partners, friends and communities.
If sharing part of my journey encourages even one man to ask a question he has been avoiding, speak to a healthcare professional, or look after his health, then speaking openly has served a purpose. Our stories can become someone else’s reason to act.
A second chance
Fear was part of my journey too. When I was facing prostate cancer, I had moments when I did not know what the future held. Behind the strength that people may have seen on the outside was a man dealing with fear, uncertainty, and questions about life itself.
But coming through that experience changed something within me. I felt that God had given me a second chance at life, and with that second chance came a purpose.
I began to understand that perhaps I shouldn't keep my experience to myself. If I had walked through fear and darkness and found my way forward, maybe I could turn around and help another man who was still standing in that darkness.
I cannot make another man’s decisions for him, and I cannot promise what his journey will be. But I can speak. I can share. I can encourage him not to ignore his health and not to face his fears alone. That is what purpose means to me now.
My second chance is not only about being grateful that I am still here. It is about asking myself:
“What can I do with the life I have been given?”
My answer is to use my voice, to bring awareness, hope, and conversation into places where there has been silence. If my story helps another man come out of the darkness, speak to his doctor, or start a conversation he's been afraid to have, then my journey becomes more than my own.
Brothers, let’s talk
If you are a man reading this, I want to speak directly to you. Please don't let fear, embarrassment, or pride silence you when it comes to your health.
You do not have to pretend that you are never frightened. I know what fear feels like. I have lived through those moments when you wonder what tomorrow may bring.
But I am still here. I believe God has given me a second chance at life for a reason. That is why I am using my voice today. Talk to your doctor. Ask questions. Learn about your personal risk. Talk to the men around you. If another man comes to you with a health concern, give him the space to speak without judgement.
We need more conversations around kitchen tables, in barbershops, workplaces, places of worship, families, and friendships. We need men looking out for other men. You may feel strong enough to carry everything by yourself, but you should not have to.
Brothers, let’s talk. Let us replace silence with conversation. Let us replace embarrassment with understanding. Let us replace fear with the courage to seek help, and let us remind one another that our lives matter.
I was given a second chance. My purpose now is to use my voice so that another man may find his way out of the darkness.
Continue the conversation: Read Brothers, Let’s Talk and learn more about my work here.
Read more from Denton Hugh Wilson
Denton Hugh Wilson, Author, Speaker & Men’s Health Advocate
Denton Hugh Wilson is an author, speaker, and men’s health advocate whose work is shaped by resilience, lived experience, and a desire to help others. Raised by his grandmother in Jamaica before moving to England at age nine, he learned powerful lessons about identity, belonging, and perseverance. Today, he uses writing and speaking to encourage honest conversations around men’s health and prostate cancer awareness. He is also the author of educational children’s books that promote safety, kindness, courage, and positive choices. Through his work, Denton seeks to turn life experience into purpose and use his voice to educate, encourage, and inspire others.
