Owning Your Wiring – Embracing Your Sensitive and/or Neurodivergent Nature

Written by Sinead Rafferty, Career & Alignment Coach

Sinéad Rafferty is a Career & Alignment Coach for highly sensitive people (HSPs), empaths & neurodivergent professionals. She has 15+ years’ experience empowering the genius of others. Founder of The HSP Purpose Pathway™ online course & community, she is passionate about the strength of high sensitivity & the impact of empathic leadership.

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The topic of Neurodiversity is an ever-evolving conversation, one shaped by lived experience, identity, perception, and definitions (clinical and social models) and the absence of a universally agreed-upon definition. It is not a simple, black-or-white concept. Instead, it draws together a wide spectrum of cognitive and sensory experiences, with no two individuals, whether autistic, ADHD, highly sensitive, or otherwise, sharing the same experience.

At its core, neurodiversity includes everyone. It accounts for all variations in neurological experience, including those shaped by life events such as injury, trauma, or even menopause. And yet, despite this inclusivity, it is also deeply personal to every individual.

As I explore the world of neurodiversity and neuroinclusion, here in this article and elsewhere, with colleagues and clients, I do not question anyone's lived experience; your truth is yours, you are the authority on your authentic experience.

The HSP connection: The complexity of labels & perspectives

Sensory sensitivity or sensory processing differences are often associated with autism and ADHD, showing up as light, sound, texture, or temperature sensitivity. Some autistic individuals are hypersensitive, while others may be hyposensitive.

Many people with ADHD experience sensory overload or have difficulty filtering out background stimuli. Sensory sensitivity is also present in countless other neurodivergent conditions/experiences.

Sensory sensitivity is also a daily reality for highly sensitive people (HSPs) and empaths.

The debate over whether sensory processing sensitivity (the psychological term for highly sensitive person) differs from autism and ADHD or if the distinctions are rooted in stigma and internalised ableism, is ongoing. Some argue that the traits of a highly sensitive person (HSP), such as sensory sensitivity and deep emotional processing, overlap significantly with autism and ADHD, and that the HSP label exists to avoid the stigma of neurodivergent diagnoses.

Others maintain that despite some similarities, autism, ADHD, and HSP are distinct, with neurological and behavioural differences, such as unique social communication patterns in autism and executive function challenges in ADHD. The discussion ultimately questions whether these categories reflect real differences or societal biases.

Here is my truth: I identify as a highly sensitive person (HSP) and empath, the descriptions and scientific findings around high sensitivity and empathic ability ring true for me and make me feel seen and heard, and understood, after many years of feeling the opposite.

My curiosity and thirst for knowledge led me to explore the possibility of ADHD or autism within myself, I do not meet the broader criteria, at least through my own research/assessment of the official criteria. I do, however, remain curious and open to my unfolding experience.

I do not doubt, though, that for some people, being labelled “just an HSP” has felt reductive or invalidating, especially if they later discover an autism or ADHD diagnosis that better explains their experience.

There are countless variations in how sensitivity, empathy, and neurodivergence present. We, as a collective, are seeking to understand the spectrum of human experience, not put individuals into neat boxes with specific labels.

Neurodivergent traits often co-occur, meaning individuals experience overlapping characteristics / neuro-traits. For example, many autistic individuals also have ADHD, experiencing both sensory sensitivities and executive function challenges.

Dyslexia frequently co-occurs with ADHD, impacting both reading abilities and attention regulation. These overlaps show us that the individual experience of neurodivergence cannot be mapped neatly; there are too many factors in play.

This is the complexity of the human experience. As we seek to understand, we may seek to categorise, but every individual is uniquely wired, experiencing the world in their own way. This diversity of thought, perception, and expression is what defines the human experience itself.

Labels are very useful for understanding, but also have the potential to cause a divide, which, ultimately, defeats the purpose of each individual living an autonomous life of agency.

What matters most is self-understanding and self-validation, isn't it?

High sensitivity may well be the entry-point for lots of people to discover that they are autistic or have ADHD... isn't that a good thing? Understanding our sensory profile and sensory experience brings so much insight to our daily lives, whatever the source of the sensitivity.

As a coach, I work with professionals across the neurodivergent spectrum, those with a formal diagnosis, those who self-identify, and those who are simply seeking greater self-understanding.

I can relate to and resonate with my clients due to my own lived experience with sensory sensitivity. I appreciate their challenges, and I seek to empower each individual's unique experience in life and work.

I have a deep understanding of how sensitivity, empathy, and neurodivergence intersect when it comes to career and personal fulfilment.

My coaching approach is entirely neuro-affirming and centres on identity alignment, energy management, and aligned action, all designed to help individuals thrive authentically in their work and life, whatever their neurotype or sensory profile.

From pathology to identity

The conversation around neurodiversity is empowering and inclusive, but can also be divisive. We are shifting away from a pathologised, clinical model where neurodivergence was considered as something to be “fixed", to a social model that embraces identity and self-acceptance.

This shift is crucial, but it also brings tension.

For example, some ADHD individuals see their traits as a “superpower” and proudly use terms like “neurospicy,” while others find these labels dismissive of the real struggles ADHD can bring.

Similarly, for some, high sensitivity is an innate trait, while others view it as a learned survival response to childhood trauma. Both perspectives hold truth, depending on individual experience.

This is why I believe in an open, nuanced approach. I have always worked from a place of embracing diverse perspectives, recognising that identity is shaped by personality, world view, cultural context, gender, sexuality, life experience, etc It is always nuanced, neurodiversity does not exist in a vacuum, it is one aspect of identity.

True inclusion means creating space for different viewpoints while ensuring that those with lived experience are at the forefront of the conversation. But if we don't all work together, there will always be division and separation, instead of inclusivity and cooperation.

Identity matters

The way we understand neurodiversity is constantly evolving. Through research, lived experience, and collective exploration, we are uncovering new insights that challenge old perspectives, reshape terminology, and expose underlying biases.

As our awareness expands, so too does our ability to recognise and affirm diverse identities.

One of the most striking intersections is between neurodivergence and LGBTQIA+ identity. Research suggests that neurodivergent individuals are significantly more likely to identify as LGBTQIA+ than the general population.

This connection may stem from a reduced susceptibility to rigid social conditioning, allowing for deeper self-exploration beyond traditional gender and sexuality norms.

Both communities share profound journeys of self-discovery, advocacy, and the need for affirming spaces, navigating a world that often misunderstands or marginalises them.

I have learned so much from the LGBTQIA+ individuals in my life about embracing authenticity, truth, and the power of living unapologetically.

Similarly, the apparent "increase" in neurodivergence among Gen Z reflects a shift in awareness, reduced stigma, and improved diagnostic understanding, not a sudden rise in prevalence!

As societal norms evolve, more individuals feel empowered to identify as neurodivergent, aided by online communities and greater mental health advocacy. Diagnostic frameworks have also expanded, uncovering previously overlooked presentations of autism and ADHD, particularly among women and marginalised groups.

What we are witnessing is not a trend, but a long-overdue recognition of neurodivergence as a natural part of human diversity, one that deserves understanding, support, and celebration.

DEIB (diversity, equity, inclusion, belonging) matters

Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, and Belonging (DEIB) initiatives are essential for neurodivergent individuals because they create spaces where identity is recognised, valued, and supported.

Many neurodivergent people have faced systemic barriers to diagnosis, workplace discrimination, social exclusion, and a lack of accommodations that hinder their success, leading to exclusion in education, work, and society.

Without DEIB efforts, neurodivergent individuals are forced to mask, conform, or struggle in environments not built for them. 

Can you imagine filtering and hiding your true identity every day? It is exhausting!

The result is burnout, mental health challenges, and so much lost potential and lost leadership! The increased stress and anxiety are due to the pressure of conforming to rigid social norms or workplace expectations, and that only applies to those who could secure employment in the first place! A lack of inclusivity leads to higher rates of unemployment and underemployment.

Inclusive policies and flexible environments ensure that neurodivergent identities are not just accommodated but recognised and appreciated as vital contributions to human diversity.

Inclusive workplaces tap into the diverse strengths and perspectives of neurodivergent individuals, enhancing innovation, collaboration, and overall well-being for everyone.

Bravely be you

In the end, self-understanding is what matters most. Whether someone identifies as (or is diagnosed) an HSP, autistic, ADHD, or other neurodivergent identities, the goal is the same: to embrace who they truly are, without judgment or limitation.

We need to focus on empowering each individual in the context of empathic leadership and compassionate workplaces; empathy is at the root of all DEIB, and it is a simple, human-to-human approach to interaction and co-operation.

This might sound like a pipedream in today's world, which means it is needed now more than ever before. We must strive for it in every possible way.

For me, the phrase "Bravely Be You" is as true as ever. 

Wherever you are on your journey, you're not alone. Be courageous and honest where possible, and aim for authenticity - your self-validation is the key to your success.

If you’re ready to create a career or business aligned with who you truly are, you’re in the right place. Let’s reimagine what’s possible together!

Book a free consultation, let's get to know each other (there's always zero pressure from me on these calls). Connection Call with Sinead.

Let's connect on LinkedIn or Instagram and visit my website for lots of free resources.

Read more from Sinead Rafferty

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Sinead Rafferty, Career & Alignment Coach

Sinéad is a visionary coach on a mission to uplift and empower the impactful contribution of purpose-driven and ambitious highly sensitive (HSP) & neurodivergent professionals.

Passionate about the role of empathic leadership in today’s society, Sinéad sees sensitivity as a powerful force and one with great purpose.

She guides her clients through an aligned and authentic approach to embodying sensitivity in meaningful ways so they can apply their innate skills and strengths to their work.

Her unique approach aims to not only bring balance to the depth and intensity of the trait of high sensitivity but also to achieve truly original, creative, and evolutionary contributions in the world.