Mr., Mrs., Ms., Miss? Where's My Box?
- Jul 20, 2022
- 3 min read
Updated: Mar 16, 2025
Written by: Laura J. Wellington, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Mr., Mrs., Ms., Miss? Where's My Box? Earlier in the week, I was asked to fill out a questionnaire. It began by requiring me to define my title prior to filling in my first and last name. I thought about how uncomfortable I was in doing so…not because I had a problem with any of the titles offered – Mr., Mrs., Ms., Miss – but because none of those exactly fit me. They all stopped “fitting me” years ago, if ever they had.
You see, I wasn’t born a Mr. I did use Miss as a young woman, but I happily traded that title in for Mrs. when I married my husband. When he died while I was in my mid-thirties, I embraced the title of Ms. because it seemed to suit me best at the time. To me, Ms. always depicted a woman who was “all business,” and frankly, I was. Being left with four little ones to raise alone and two failing companies to turn around in the aftermath of my husband’s death, I couldn’t be anything but.
However, somewhere between the age of forty-five and fifty-five, I morphed into a woman who finally 'came into her own' as a result of all of those previously mentioned titles and everything that came with them. Thus, I outgrew each and, in that, currently remain title-less.
Admittedly, I did research whether or not there were any additional titles available that I might have overlooked in my quest to fill in the proverbial box. The most reasonable ones that I came upon were “M’ or “Madame.” The former merely confused me. No doubt, it would confuse others too. The latter made me sound like a character straight out of Bridgerton and although I am a big fan of the series, I just can’t.
I find it truly ironic that, with all of the varied pronouns we recently adopted, that same train of thought hasn’t been applied to titles. I certainly can’t be alone in the gray abyss I continue to find myself. And although to many, it might be a small thing… to me, I’d like a proper box to check, one which makes me feel included too.
That said, by bringing the topic up doesn’t mean that I am pushing to eliminate all titles from our vernacular or society, especially those earned through remarkable accomplishments and degrees. I simply think we need to add one or two more to the group of titles considered mainstream simply because women have evolved beyond the present-day offerings. Otherwise, I may just have to create my own, such as Me.
Me. Laura J. Wellington, leaving everyone either wondering or laughing upon reading or hearing me refer to myself. I could probably live with the giggle as it would, once again, remind me of how far I have come and who I currently am today – a woman who has seriously moved beyond being able to be defined even by progressive standards. And again, I say, I’m not alone.
Laura J. Wellington, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Laura J. Wellington is the Founder of Celebrity-Lifestyle blog THREAD MB. A Media-Tech Entrepreneur, Wellington is also an Award-Winning Children's Entertainment creator and Author. Critics have called her most recent book "Be Careful What You Wish For" a 'magnum opus. A TEDx Speaker, Wellington's newest venture is called ZNEEX, an app that combines fitness and socializing for users and their dogs in a fun, new way that has partners saying "it's the best idea that they've heard in a very long time" (coming to you May 2022). A mother of five, Wellington was widowed at thirty-five years old. She has won The Forbes Enterprise Award, Multiple Telly Awards, The Buzz Award, and many more.
