Leading With Heart Isn’t Weak – It’s A Superpower
Cindy Benning is passionate about elevating the quality of leadership in our world. She founded Dragonfly Insights, a company dedicated to empowering leaders through coaching and teaching five BRAVE® virtues designed to propel organizations into excellence.
Leadership isn’t a one-size-fits-all journey. It’s a spectrum shaped by personality, experience, and choices. At one end, we find leaders focused on outcomes at any cost, and at the other, leaders who harness emotional intelligence (EI) to connect and inspire. Most leaders fall somewhere in between. Let’s take a closer look at this spectrum and how self-awareness can guide us toward a more balanced and impactful leadership style.
Alex: The tactical leader at one end
Alex operates at the "results-at-all-costs" extreme. Efficiency is their mantra, and metrics are their compass. Their leadership style is structured and predictable, yet it lacks a human element. The team produces results, but something is missing—a sense of fulfillment and connection.
When Mia, a top performer, begins to falter, Alex views her struggle as a problem to be fixed rather than an opportunity to connect. “Why aren’t your numbers where they should be?” Alex asks, oblivious to Mia’s personal challenges. Over time, Mia feels undervalued and leaves the team. The cracks in Alex’s leadership widen, revealing the limits of a purely tactical approach.
Jordan: The emotionally attuned leader at the other end
On the opposite end, we meet Jordan, a leader deeply invested in emotional connection. They prioritize trust, empathy, and collaboration. When Mia’s performance dips, Jordan pauses. “Mia, is everything okay? Let me know how I can support you,” they say with genuine concern. This simple act of empathy creates space for Mia to share her struggles. Jordan provides flexibility, and Mia not only recovers but excels.
Jordan’s leadership brings out the best in the team, fostering an environment of safety and creativity. But even Jordan knows there’s a balance to maintain—too much focus on emotional connection can sometimes delay tough decisions or create blurred boundaries.
The spectrum where most leaders reside
Most leaders aren’t Alex or Jordan—they’re navigating the vast space in between. Each choice they make moves them closer to one end of the spectrum or the other. For example:
A leader might prioritize results during a crisis but lean into empathy during quieter times.
Another might struggle with emotional awareness yet instinctively build trust through consistency and fairness.
Leadership is a dynamic journey, not a fixed position. The key is recognizing where you fall on the spectrum and adjusting as needed.
Finding the balance
The best leaders learn to balance strategy and empathy, blending tactical precision with emotional connection. They understand that:
Emotional intelligence is a tool: It’s not about being overly soft or accommodating—it’s about using empathy and understanding to make better decisions.
Results and relationships go hand-in-hand: Leaders who value their teams build loyalty and achieve sustainable results.
Self-awareness is key: Knowing your default leadership style helps you adapt and grow.
What kind of leader will you be?
Leadership isn’t about being perfect; it’s about being purposeful. Alex and Jordan represent two extremes, but the journey lies in finding your place on the spectrum. By embracing self-awareness and emotional intelligence, you can lead with both heart and results—blending humanity with effectiveness.
After all, leadership isn’t a destination. It’s a lifelong path of growth, adaptation, and discovery.
Where will you choose to go?
Cindy Benning, Leadership Development Consultant
Cindy Benning has a unique ability to turn chaos into calm. Her extensive career, characterized by continuous education, leadership, and coaching, has equipped her with robust strategies to navigate myriad challenges professionally and personally. Her 2022 publication, "Being BRAVE®, A Journey of Self-Discovery into Leadership," tells the story of how she came to develop insights into managing the stories we tell ourselves to reveal our true selves. Only then can we learn to lead and live with joy and authenticity.
