Healing Isn't About Erasing the Past, It's About Changing Your Relationship With It
As a reiki practitioner, channeler, yoga teacher, and sound healer, Rosie weaves together energy work, movement, and sacred sound to create deeply transformative healing experiences. Through the circles she hosts, she guides others on their healing journeys, holding intentional space for alignment, release, and reconnection to their inner wisdom.
Are we meant to heal everything? Can we just sit with an experience, acknowledge it, recognize it, and let it be? As humans, we are programmed to solve problems. We look for answers, explanations, and ways to make things better. But what if not everything needs to be fixed? What if some experiences are simply meant to be acknowledged, understood, and accepted?
Sometimes, an experience teaches us something about ourselves. We can ask what we learned, how it made us feel, and what we want to carry forward. Perhaps the lesson matters more than the experience itself.
Healing isn't always about fixing, releasing, or forgetting something. Sometimes, it's about allowing ourselves to process what happened and reaching a place where we can accept it without allowing it to define us.
Our experiences become part of our story, but they don't have to determine who we become. Grief, a breakup or divorce, an unfortunate experience, or a physical accident can all affect us in different ways. Some experiences leave emotional wounds, others affect us mentally or physically, and some impact us in ways we don't fully understand until much later.
We all heal differently. There is no right or wrong way to heal, and there is no universal timeline. It's important to give ourselves grace rather than put pressure on ourselves to reach a particular destination. Every circumstance is unique, and each presents its own opportunities for growth and learning.
But what happens when we believe we've healed from something, only to discover that it still affects us? Sometimes, unresolved experiences surface in our everyday lives, particularly in our relationships and interactions with others. A comment, a disagreement, or a difference of opinion can trigger an emotional response that feels bigger than the moment itself.
I feel like this is where our ego can come into play. We become defensive. We feel the need to explain ourselves, prove our point, or make someone else understand our perspective. Instead of pausing to reflect, we react. We focus on what the other person said or did rather than asking ourselves why it affected us so deeply.
Of course, not every strong reaction comes from an unhealed wound. Sometimes, our feelings are a natural response to what's happening in the present. But learning to recognize the difference can be an important part of understanding ourselves. What if, instead of immediately reacting, we gave ourselves a moment to pause?
What if we asked ourselves, “Why did that bother me? What am I feeling right now? Does this situation remind me of something I've experienced before?” These questions aren't about blaming ourselves for our feelings. They're about becoming curious about them.
When we bring awareness to our discomfort, we create an opportunity to understand ourselves better. We may discover that our reaction has less to do with the person standing in front of us and more to do with something we've carried from the past.
That awareness gives us a choice. We can continue responding the way we always have, or we can begin learning a different way.
With healing comes growth. But growth doesn't mean we'll never be triggered again, nor does it mean we'll always respond perfectly.
Sometimes, a familiar situation comes back around, and we find ourselves facing emotions we thought we'd already worked through. It's easy to interpret this as a setback, question our progress, or wonder whether we've truly healed at all.
But perhaps there's another way to look at it. Sometimes, we encounter a situation that reminds us of who we used to be, only to realize that we no longer respond in the same way. We recognize the feeling, understand where it comes from, and choose to approach it differently.
Other times, we may find ourselves reacting just as we always have. That doesn't mean we've failed. It may simply be an opportunity to recognize an area that still needs our attention.
Healing isn't about becoming someone who never feels hurt, anger, sadness, or discomfort. It's about learning to sit with those feelings, understand them, and decide how we want to move forward.
Sometimes, an experience we thought we'd healed from comes back around to show us how far we've come. Other times, it reminds us that there's still more to learn. Either way, we have an opportunity to grow.
Perhaps healing isn't about reaching a point where the past no longer exists within us. Perhaps it's about reaching a place where we can acknowledge it without allowing it to dictate our present or determine our future.
You cannot change what happened, but you can change your relationship with it. Sometimes that's where healing truly begins.
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Rosalba De La Rosa-Ruiz, Spiritual Wellness Practitioner
Rosalba “Rosie” De La Rosa-Ruiz is a reiki practitioner, channeler, yoga teacher, and sound healer devoted to guiding others through transformative healing experiences. Blending energy work, intuitive guidance, movement, and sacred sound, she creates heart-centered spaces that support deep release and reconnection. Through her circles, classes, and one-on-one sessions, Rosie empowers others to align with their inner wisdom and step into greater balance and authenticity. Her writing carries the same intention, offering insight, inspiration, and practical tools for the healing journey. Connect with Rosie to explore more of her work and upcoming offerings.
