Forget Valentine’s Day ‒ Celebrate This Instead
Written by: Pauline Morris, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
February is the month of new beginnings, you thought it was January didn’t you?
The Chinese new year often falls in February (as it did this year), and it’s the month the groundhog emerges from its burrow to signal (hopefully) the start of spring. February is also the birth month of the woman recognised as the first female physician- Elizabeth Blackwell and one of the most influential forces of change Rosa Parks.
But it’s most well known worldwide (just about) as the month of love, Valentines Day, February 14th. A day that may be filled, with excitement, anticipation, joy, fun and celebration. Of course, it’s also plagued by, commercialism, pressure, expense and for many sadness, loneliness, disappointment, heartache and judgment. So I’m not going to write about Valentine’s Day, may I suggest we celebrate something else?
I propose we celebrate with equal or even greater fervour another day of acknowledgment, established but not universally celebrated, February 17th – Random Acts of Kindness Day.
Kindness doesn’t just help the people to whom you are kind, the impact on you and the subsequent acts of ‘paying it forward is immeasurable. But we know that, so why isn’t it more of a priority for us?
Kindness isn’t trendy or sexy, not like mindset or passion or self-care. We may think about it, we know it’s a good thing, but we don’t strive to epitomise it. There’s almost a negative association with describing someone as ‘kind’, tantamount to kindness being perhaps a character flaw of the weak, all be it a good flaw!
We tend to admire people who are determined, focused, charismatic, driven; how often do we celebrate people who are kind?
It’s a pity, I think, ‘cause it’s such a no-brainer. Imagine a world where we approach life with the intention to be kind first. Our actions would change, the tone of our conversations would soften, our mindset would shift, our very existence would take on a different hue. I feel calmer just writing about it and I’m even smiling!
Oh yes, that is lovely, but, would I describe myself as kind? I’m somewhat abashed that my first thought was no. Is it good enough to not be described as ‘unkind’? Food for thought this one.
All this ruminating on kindness has helped me come to a decision. In celebration of Random Acts of Kindness Day, I’m going to make a concerted effort to put kindness at the forefront of my thoughts, actions and deeds, not only towards others but also to myself.
The latter will be the bigger challenge I think. I don’t know about you, but I find it difficult to be kind to myself. Does the phrase ‘you’re being too hard on yourself’ apply to you? It certainly does to me!
I’ll be honest, when I started writing this, I thought I was going to be writing about how we should be kinder to each other, then I realised perhaps what we also need to be focussing on is how to be kind to ourselves. The proverbial put your own house in order first.
I think mine will look like this:
I forgive others I forgive myself
I speak kindly to others I speak kindly to myself
I compliment people I celebrate myself, my accomplishments, my wins
I don’t judge others I give myself a break
I speak kindly to people about people I speak kindly about myself to others
I do nice things for others I do nice things for myself (for no reason)
I have compassion for others I have compassion for myself
Powerful stuff this being kind to yourself, I am definitely feeling better and I’m smiling again.
What would you add to your kindness list?
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Pauline Morris, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Spanning several regions including the Caribbean, Middle East and the United Kingdom, Dr. Pauline Morris brings a wealth of experience as a leader within and outside of medicine, as a Consultant Anaesthetist and a Career Coach. After becoming a single mum at 17 and choosing a life of caring for others, she realised the true difficulties doctors face in attaining happy healthy lives, whilst providing a gold standard of care to their patients. As the founder of Doctors Caring for Doctors, a career coaching and support service for physicians, her mission is to help all doctors discover how they can have a fulfilling life and a successful career without burning out.
In crafting her own successful career as a physician and entrepreneur, she is well placed to help doctors who crave inspired solutions to the competing demands of a medical career and home life.
One of her greatest gifts is her ability to authentically connect with her clients, allowing them the space to find the complete clarity that leads them to their own unique path, emotional freedom, personal joy and professional achievement.
