Written by: Mary Patricia Smiley, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Are you at that point in your business or life where things are stagnant? You’re doing the most! Sharing as much content as is visibly possible, appearing on all the platforms (even if it's not your favourite) but for the sake of the cause and all that… and cold messaging potential leads in the hope to bring in some last-minute interest in that programme you’ve so passionately been selling for months?
Are you this person? If you said yes to any of this - continue reading friends…
Despair...
What you have to realise is that you are not alone in this. Most of us as teachers, mentors and coaches have been right there at one point or other and recognise that feeling of absolute dread. You know when it’s happening as the gut tightens, you can no longer talk freely, the passion starts to trickle out like poison (in the despair to get anyone interested) and the sweat beads start appearing along the brow in anticipation of the envisioned outcome. The element of despair rears its ugly head because we are heavily invested in this idea - we are all in and it matters if people like it or not! This idea or concept somehow validates our existence in a way that feels scary as all hell! It’s like this huge gamble that must pay off - all or nothing folks, last chance saloon. This happens because the investment is more than financial, it's also emotional and that my friend is where the tower starts to crumble!
Suddenly we are moving from a space of open inspired creativity to a place of contracted, lacklustre blockages where flow can't exist.
The key is to ask yourself honest questions where the answer can only be yes or no...
Does your content always reflect what you genuinely believe?
Do you actually feel connected to your message?
Are you churning stuff out because we are told to be consistent?
Is your content connected to a desired outcome?
Do you find it difficult to create from love and abundance even when things are up in the air?
If you said yes to any of this stay tuned...
So how do we move from despair to desire in a short space of time in order to create abundance and freedom in our lives and businesses?
Remember that despair is an emotion like any other that can spiral out of control pretty quickly. I’ve been there. Once the nervous system receives intel that something isn’t right, something is off and out of balance, it can become a downward spiral of hopelessness that can be challenging to stabilise. The engine may be revving nicely but the situation can quickly shift gears to inertia and from inertia into the state of frozen bones which is an innate fear of taking another step in the process because loss is implied or the complete opposite; over the action which consists of doing things for the sake of appearing seemingly productive…
These are crucial moments in the shelf life of an emotion which has the ability and the leeway should we allow it, to create a chemical change in the matrix of our system to either reflect balance (rest and digest) or panic(flight or fight). It takes very little time to set in motion a series of actions to recalibrate the nervous system encouraging reconnection to that sense of equilibrium and spaciousness once again.
Desire…
When we lean into the state of desire we are going back to the basics of what we love. It reminds me of the 6 of Cups in the tarot deck when we marinade in the nostalgic feelings of why we do this thing we are passionate about and feel into what that felt like at the time of conception we can connect back into the true essence of the why. Remember your why? That guy is what you go back to - to start feeling again… It's a feeling rather than an activity.
Apart from your why, how does your work make you feel? How does it make others feel? The former is where the sweetness resides because as long as you are creating from a space of excitement and joy, it will naturally yield results - even when you least expect it to happen!
For some of us this feeling can almost be sensual - notice how you feel excitement… An example of this can be seen through our Human Design charts. For instance, I’m a Generator with sacral authority. I need to feel legit lit up inside for projects and creative pursuits to get started - there’s a lot more to it but this info alone is powerful enough to begin cultivating desire.
This will encourage you to move from a different space when creating and attract the people who love your work making the effort feel effortless and with a reduced expectation of an outcome, you become a match in vibration for what you give and in turn what you receive. The Transaction becomes equal and you can thrive in the conative state of desire rather than the shadow frequency of despair.
So when you start to notice your nervous system flaring up…
Stop and acknowledge the feeling.
Feel the feels… Go outside in nature and feel cool air hit the surface of your skin, journal angrily or brain dump everything onto that paper, scream do not try to control the emotion - this is where we go wrong. It needs to be released before we can move on
Watch something that shifts the mindset from the state of despair to desire. I recently discovered some footage on YouTube documenting Christiano Ronaldo’s effect on Children. It’s fascinating to watch but also to feel my energy move from anxious to amazing. Their absolute adoration of their fav star is infectious and how he treats them in return is adorable. It instantly alters the trajectory of my day… so find that thing that works for you…
Breathe slowly. Feel your belly expand with the breath going in - slowly count to 5 and feel your belly contract with softness as the air leaves with a count of 6. Feel the heartbeat start to slow as you calibrate once again
When you’re in it you can’t see but remember this is once again a self-imposed prison in the tarot that would present as the 8 of swords - you are given permission to take the blindfold off and connect back in with what’s real which is your amazing talents and gifts.
If you are interested in using your human design to cultivate desire click here for your free guide or get in touch for reading let's shift the trajectory of your creative projects and pursuits...
Mary Patricia Smiley, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Mary is a Holistic Guide, mentor & teacher who empowers, ignites and inspires individuals to live to their fullest potential. She’s a natural activator with a humble background in Corporate HR & Marketing. After quitting her last HR job after ten days due to irreconcilable differences with management and a passion to support the people more than the management, she escaped to Morocco to consider her next step as she knew another corporate role would reap the same result - it was time to just not search for a job but to seek the purpose. After a few weeks of deep soul searching, journaling and contemplation, a new path was born. Upon returning home, she decided to train to be a yoga teacher. With no money to do so, she relied on her belief and faith that this was the new path. Three days later she received a tax rebate totalling the amount needed for the training she aimed to do. From that day forward she believed that your energy can change the trajectory of your life if you believe it can. Her journey took another life-changing turn when she discovered Human Design and Gene Keys. The contemplations and deep transmissions enabled her to feel into the aspects of her inner landscape where she felt restricted growth and expansion - she examined the changes over many years and realized that other gifts had sprouted out of this foundational work and that this would be the gift that she would share with others.
After immersing herself deeply into the teachings, the other gifts amplified to the point where they couldn't be ignored. She recognized that there was a need for this work within the wellness sphere. It had such a dramatic impact on her life; she developed her own system to help others combat inner conflict in order to magnetize the life they desire. Most of the work is based on tweaking energy, managing fluctuating emotional states to cultivate desire; through the modalities of Human Design, Tarot and Gene Key contemplations, neuroscience tools, and embodied mindful practices.
Mary Patricia is a strong believer that inner alchemy is the catalyst for embodied energetic synergy. She teaches her clients how to shift out of spiraling emotional mindset patterns to feeling the spaciousness that clarity can bring, which grows through desire and open energetic vibrations. The majority of her work has a deep focus on managing fluctuating emotions and shifting quickly to a space of ease, flow, and abundance.
